silent thunder Posted January 10, 2015 (edited) . Edited February 4, 2022 by silent thunder 2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ThisLife Posted January 13, 2015 If you're not familiar with the work of Steven Wright, he's the famous comic scientist who once said: "I woke up one morning, and all of my stuff had been stolen and replaced by exact duplicates."His mind sees things differently than most of us do. Here are some of his gems : Â **1 - I'd kill for a Nobel Peace Prize.2- Half the people you know are below average.3 - 99% of lawyers give the rest a bad name.4 - 82.7% of all statistics are made up on the spot.5 - A conscience is what hurts when all your other parts feel so good.6- A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.7 - All those who believe in psycho kinesis, raise my hand.8 - I almost had a psychic girlfriend once... But she left me before we met.9 - OK, so what's the speed of dark?10 - How do you tell when you're out of invisible ink?11 - Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.12 - When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.13 - Ambition is a poor excuse for not having enough sense to be lazy.14 - I intend to live forever... So far, so good.15 - If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?16 - Eagles may soar, but foxes don't get sucked into jet engines.17 - What happens if you get scared half to death twice?18 - My mechanic told me, "I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder."19 - Why do psychics have to ask you for your name.20 - A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking.21 - Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.22 - The hardness of the butter is proportional to the softness of the bread.23 - To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research.24 - If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.And my all-time favorite:25 - If your car could travel at the speed of light, would your headlights work? Â Â ** 7 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Infinity Posted January 13, 2015 (edited) Everything! Â Edited January 13, 2015 by Infinity Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Marblehead Posted January 13, 2015 Yeah, but sometimes when you're smiling people wonder what kind of naughty stuff you're thinking about. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Apech Posted January 13, 2015 Yeah, but sometimes when you're smiling people wonder what kind of naughty stuff you're thinking about. Â Laugh and the world laughs at you. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Marblehead Posted January 13, 2015 Laugh and the world laughs at you. They used to laugh with you though. 2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ThisLife Posted January 13, 2015 (edited) . He who laughs last thinks slowest. Edited January 13, 2015 by ThisLife 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Marblehead Posted January 14, 2015 And we won't say anything about those who never get the punch line. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
GrandmasterP Posted January 14, 2015 And we won't say anything about those who never get the punch line. Â Punchline = Bartender - " I'm sorry we don't serve breakfast here." Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Joke = Two eggs and bacon walk into a bar. 3 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
futuredaze Posted January 14, 2015 This video my friend showed me of animals bein gangsta. Â 2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
gatito Posted January 14, 2015 (edited) http://www.canalplus.fr/c-divertissement/c-le-petit-journal/pid6515-le-petit-journal.html?vid=1197729 Edited January 14, 2015 by gatito Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
thelerner Posted February 9, 2015 Hubble Telescope Spots an Emoticon in Outer Space Hubble/ESA/NASA Galaxy cluster SDSS J1038+4849 It's actually a cluster of galaxiesIn the center of this Hubble Telescope image is the galaxy cluster SDSS J1038+4849 — and it appears to be smiling back at you. The two orange eyes of the grinning face are actually two distant galaxies, and the peculiar smile was caused by an effect known as strong gravitational lensing. Galaxy clusters are so large that they can create a strong gravitational pull that warps the time and space surrounding them. From afar this creates a distorted view of reality, known as a ‘cosmic lens. 4 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Taomeow Posted February 13, 2015 This coming Monday is Presidents day. I had a FB listen in on an exchange between a grandmother and a 10-year-old girl that revealed to me what it's all about (I'm not all that clear on many holidays and memorable days, but now I know about this one!) Â So, the grandmother goes, "Monday is Presidents day," the girl responds, "yes, I know." So granny decides to test her on the extent of her knowledge and asks, "What do you know about Presidents day, sweetie? What happens on this day?" She thought the girl would say, "no school," or else talk about Obama or Bush or Clinton, but instead she came back with, "It's the day when the president comes out of his White House, and if he can see his shadow, it means we'll have another year of BS." 5 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
zerostao Posted June 20, 2015 (edited) Â Â http://travel.aol.co.uk/2015/06/18/raccoon-ride-alligator-florida-photograph/ Edited June 20, 2015 by zerostao 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Marblehead Posted July 8, 2015 That is actually a drawing of a real fish in the deep oceans. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
blue eyed snake Posted July 8, 2015 (edited) Â :DÂ Â Â meditation made me laugh Edited July 8, 2015 by blue eyed snake Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Marblehead Posted July 8, 2015 I see you are expanding your spirituality. Good for you! 2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
