What made YOU laugh today/tonight ?

[Taomeow]

[Nungali]

22 hours ago, manitou said:

Look again.  Actually, it's not a doggie door or any type of door.  It's the top of the chair below.  Which really makes it interesting, because there are 2 arms on the chair, which means it's not merely steps up to the bed.  The fact that the pillow may be covering a toilet chamber occurs to me as a possibility.  If that were the case, I wonder if they were usually pushed up against the bed like that right next to the pillow?  There seem to be some inherent problems with that.  Maybe if it were more down toward the foot of the bed....

 

Errrmmmm ....      the door with the king's picture on it  has a chair below it  ? ? ?  

 

here ya go ;

 

Spoiler

 

Quote

 

And who cuts a square hole into their bedroom door, anyway?

 

 

 

 

 

VERY  prudent people !   (You have heard about the nightgown with the hole in it  ... the sheet with a hole in  it ?   This is just a step further .    

Edited October 19, 2020 by Nungali

[Nungali]

3 hours ago, Taomeow said:

 

 

I forgot about covid    (not that hard here as it has virtually disappeared )  the other day, I went to get a coffee and  since I had not had breakfast  I decided to have some fruit toast as well . 'Take away or have here .'     I decided to eat in .   'Name ?"   I tell her .   "Phone number ? "

 

Why does this woman want my phone number ???  " You want my phone number ?  "     "Yes."     ......   

 

" Why do you want  my  phone number ?"

 

...  " For covid records . "

 

 

" Ohhhhhhhh   .... "    

[manitou]

Laughing face times ten, Ms. Meow, on the sitting kitty.  I had other posters on my tail so I had to pull out of the lane onto the shoulder.  But I'm back now, a little less shaky.

 

 

 

Edited October 20, 2020 by manitou

[manitou]

6 hours ago, Nungali said:

 

Errrmmmm ....      the door with the king's picture on it  has a chair below it  ? ? ?  

 

here ya go ;

 

  Reveal hidden contents

 

 

 

VERY  prudent people !   (You have heard about the nightgown with the hole in it  ... the sheet with a hole in  it ?   This is just a step further .    

 

 

Oh.  You found my readers.

 

No, weisenheimer.  the wooden structure adjacent to the dragon appears to be a chitter.

 

 

Edited October 20, 2020 by manitou

[Apech]

[Nungali]

Watching 'Black Comedy'  last night ; 

 

father and son sketch ;

 

"Dad , how come only white people get abducted by UFOs ? "

 

(    )  

 

 

<  father thinks a bit  >

 

" Because they are easier to see at night . "

 

[manitou]

21 hours ago, Apech said:

 

 

That's great, lol.  I actually got that very same picture texted to me by my sister in law (with her true knees) laying on a beach in Hawaii, when I was up in Alaska at 36 below waiting for the aurora borealis to appear.  I was so cold it almost made me angry.

 

 

Edited October 21, 2020 by manitou

[Nungali]

Why is it when I mishear a word I sometimes think it was a crazy out of context, a word that makes no sense instead of my brain sensibly working out  the right word that sounded like it in the it in the proper  context ?

 

Thank goodness its been done to me on occasion so I know its not  'just me '.

 

So I am at 'Alchemy' , the local holistic center getting a deep tissue massage . The masseur is pretty good and has given my neck tendons a  full on work out and then goes to a more relaxing  sort of kneading below my collar bone , a bit like a cat does when it gets on your lap or a  cushion and starts kneading it with its paws .

 

And she goes  : "  I can offer you a special panther massage  "

 

Me;  " That sounds scary ."

 

" Why ?  "

 

"  What , you gonna bring a panther in here  ....  you got one out the back ? "

 

" What ? "

 

" I suppose its the name of some special technique ? "

 

"  What is ?
 

" A panther massage   -  sounds sharp and scratchy  ."

 

" Special  pamper massage , I said  ;   a relaxing massage followed by a facial. "

 

" Oh ..... 

 

 

[Nungali]

[Taomeow]

[Nungali]

( now you have done it  ... I had Nuns as teachers in early school, so we had a LOT of Nun jokes . )

 

A flasher sees a Nun and decides, because  she is a nun she will make a great victim and be really shocked at his exposure . So he waits until there are other people around to increase her embarrassment .  At the 'right ' moment he jumps in front of her and yells out

' Yaaahhh !  "  everyone nearby turns to look and the flasher rips his overcoat open .   Everyone is staring, the nun, is just standing there staring  ... curiously .  Then she says ....

 

Spoiler

"  Ohhh  ...... that looks just like a penis , only a lot smaller .  "

 

[Nungali]

 

< delete >

Edited November 1, 2020 by Nungali
too dumb , apparently .

[manitou]

LOL.  that's a really dumb joke, Nungers.

[Nungali]

6 hours ago, manitou said:

LOL.  that's a really dumb joke, Nungers.

 

 

Okay I get rid of it then .

 

But I like dumb, bad jokes .     Also  '  Dad jokes ' .  and really long jokes that dont actually have an ending , politically incorrect ones ... (actually, I have been sparing you  ) .

 

or even jokes that dont even have to have a joke attached  .

 

Spoiler

Have  you heard the one about the albino, mongoloid, schizophrenic,  Siamese twins joined at the hip ?

 

https://bestlifeonline.com/dad-jokes-so-bad-theyre-actually-hilarious/

 

[Apech]

 

I am truly amazed that two men in their late 70's can keep up their election for four days!!!!

 

 

[doc benway]

On 11/1/2020 at 5:28 PM, Nungali said:

 

 

Okay I get rid of it then .

 

But I like dumb, bad jokes .     Also  '  Dad jokes ' .  and really long jokes that dont actually have an ending , politically incorrect ones ... (actually, I have been sparing you  ) .

 

or even jokes that dont even have to have a joke attached  .

 

  Hide contents

Have  you heard the one about the albino, mongoloid, schizophrenic,  Siamese twins joined at the hip ?

 

https://bestlifeonline.com/dad-jokes-so-bad-theyre-actually-hilarious/

 

 

So this baby seal walks into a club...

[Nungali]

 

[Apech]

 

[Nungali]

I love an unexpected ending  

 

 

 

 

 

[Apech]

 

People may laugh at me but I'm not stupid - I once did a jigsaw in 6 weeks when the box said 3 - 6 years.

[Apech]

[Nungali]

Not as bad as the mystery of getting the doona into its cover !

 

I mean why one earth do they make the slot only half as wide as the bloody dooner ! 

 

I've tried everything ! 

 

 

They could just put the studs down 3 open sides . Then you lay it out, lay dooner on it , fold the cover over and snap, snap, snap .

 

Stupid bloody dooner covers !   

 

 

.

 

Edited November 21, 2020 by Nungali

[manitou]

10 hours ago, Apech said:

 

 

 

Now that's a joke that went one frame too far.

[manitou]

8 minutes ago, Nungali said:

Not as bad as the mystery of getting the doona into its cover !

 

I mean why one earth do they make the slot only half as wide as the bloody dooner ! 

 

I've tried everything ! 

 

 

They could just put the studs down 3 open sides . Then you lay it out, lay dooner on it , fold the cover over and snap, snap, snap .

 

Stupid bloody dooner covers !   

 

 

.

 

 

 

I have absolutely no clue what you are talking about.  hopefully others will.  Is that a draped figure of some sort?  A religious icon, perhaps?

 

* * * * * *

 

post-Urban Dictionary:

 

1. Dooner. An uncool stoner. Someone who gets high alone, doesnt shower typically found in Government Camp Oregon. Wow, look at that dooner down the road in his gross, smelly flannel.

    

 

So now I ask you:

 

why have you thrown a cover over the Dooner?  Is that because he hasn't showered?  Does he mind the snap, snap, snap thing?  Are you doing his laundry?  Wash the flannel in cold.

 

 

 

Edited November 21, 2020 by manitou