Cat Pillar Posted March 10, 2011 What I think is important: that you are paying attention and being honest with yourself. Growth is always going to be messy; being willing to stay present throughout the changes, that's what's going to keep you on the front edge of the curve.  Yeah, I agree! When I earnestly started my spiritual journey, self-honesty was one of the first things I had to learn. Hard to get anywhere if you keep lying to yourself.  --------------------------  1) Calm down. A nervous state of mind accomplishes nothing. A fearful state of mind likewise. 2) Don't worry about the nature of self. Concern yourself with virtuous acts, good deeds and wholesome thoughts. Once you are in a habit of these, things will fall away and all your questions will be answered.  3) The path to happiness is happiness. Liberation is a mind state not a destination.  1) Easier said than done, especially with anxiety disorder. But I'm working on it! Meditation is helping, slowly.  2) I don't even know what virtuous acts, good deeds, and wholesome thoughts are. It all seems so subjective. I try to help anyone who asks and give as much as I can, try to live up to my word to the best of my ability, try to be as honest as I can, and do not harbor ill will against others...those are virtuous things to me. As for wholesome thoughts...is thinking about sex unwholesome? If so, I probably still have some work to do. Having never been with a girl, I've got quite a bit of frustration to work through. Not that I have room in my life for a relationship right now anyways...  3) It's a mind state I'm not familiar with, and therefore do not how to experience it. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Birch Posted March 10, 2011 Yeah, I agree! When I earnestly started my spiritual journey, self-honesty was one of the first things I had to learn. Hard to get anywhere if you keep lying to yourself.  --------------------------    1) Easier said than done, especially with anxiety disorder. But I'm working on it! Meditation is helping, slowly.  2) I don't even know what virtuous acts, good deeds, and wholesome thoughts are. It all seems so subjective. I try to help anyone who asks and give as much as I can, try to live up to my word to the best of my ability, try to be as honest as I can, and do not harbor ill will against others...those are virtuous things to me. As for wholesome thoughts...is thinking about sex unwholesome? If so, I probably still have some work to do. Having never been with a girl, I've got quite a bit of frustration to work through. Not that I have room in my life for a relationship right now anyways...  3) It's a mind state I'm not familiar with, and therefore do not how to experience it.  Most things are easier done than said:-) What i mean is if you imagine having to verbalise every single movement, thought, process, reaction, counter-reaction then IMO one would end up bonkers:-) Just take "driving a car" for example and you'll be close to what I'm trying to explain. Of course, one might object that whatever we're referring to is nothing at all like driving a car. And you're right, it's just the object that's a bit different. Well, this is how I figure it myself anyway.  Who gave you anxiety "disorder"?? If there's one very big thing that pisses me off it's the classification of certain behaviours and perspectives into "disorders". IMO and IME, feeling "anxious" is actually warranted in lots of situations. Of course it's unpleasant and I totally get why one would rather not. So for sure, all of the meditation techniques that help with that are very awesome  There's nothing wrong with sex unless the sex is wrong :-) IMO I laugh at myself with this one quite often. The more it goes, the more i see sex as a sort of a "let's hold hands" thing. IMO What's really the point is the relationship between the people (however long or short). 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Cat Pillar Posted March 10, 2011  Who gave you anxiety "disorder"?? If there's one very big thing that pisses me off it's the classification of certain behaviours and perspectives into "disorders". IMO and IME, feeling "anxious" is actually warranted in lots of situations. Of course it's unpleasant and I totally get why one would rather not. So for sure, all of the meditation techniques that help with that are very awesome   My counselor. I'm not intending to use "disorder" as an excuse, and I'm not nearly as "bad" as I used to be...but when the prospect of getting in the car for a 5 minute drive to a friend's house gives you panic attacks, something is obviously wrong.  Now, I don't experience that level of anxiety anymore, but I do seem to have a default "worry" mode. True relaxation is something I haven't felt in years, except fleetingly. The closest I get is in meditation, and I have been noticing that even then there's still tension/anxiety being harbored in nearly every part of my body.  I agree that anxiety can be warranted in certain situations, but it's still something I would rather let arise and pass naturally...it has a tendency to stick with me.  There's nothing wrong with sex unless the sex is wrong :-) IMOI laugh at myself with this one quite often. The more it goes, the more i see sex as a sort of a "let's hold hands" thing. IMO What's really the point is the relationship between the people (however long or short).  The relationship is the part I'm most interested in...I'm not really interested in the sex if there's no relationship to go with it.  That said, I don't think a relationship is in the cards right now, and have no idea when it might be. Not enough room in my life at this time, and making room for it isn't high on my priorities at this stage in my development. As much as I'd like a partner, I don't think I'm ready for one. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Otis Posted March 10, 2011 I do seem to have a default "worry" mode. True relaxation is something I haven't felt in years, except fleetingly. The closest I get is in meditation, and I have been noticing that even then there's still tension/anxiety being harbored in nearly every part of my body. Great observation, Mr. Pillar. Â In my own exploration of panic, I find that much of my anxiety plays out in my body. Stretching has actually been one of the greatest stress reducers I've experienced (especially stretching in the steam room!). IME, emotional stress + physical tension = suffering, but emotional stress without my body resisting it, I find to be more of an adventure. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
