de_paradise Posted July 14, 2011 Strange and difficult week, friends.  Symptoms:  -complete loss of apetite, the thought of food made me feel un-hungry -muscle tension (normally I do yoga and vocal singing exercises, so I am exactly aware of how many muscles should be, I could not sing due to the tension, and yoga was hard going) -nightmares, somehow caused by a base fear and negativity. -misery, negative thinking, torpor. -lack of concentration, memory and senses like eye function -energy getting vamped everywhere, want to avoid eye contact or proximity of people.  Meditations: good Physical energy: good   I deduced that it was perhaps detox symptoms, but I'd not have this kind of array of symptoms before, yet I've detoxed lots. My friend believes its a kind of machinations of a bad person, but I dont think its that either  Steps I've taken:  -Avoid eye contact and any person who is not pure and giving -create a clean environment in my apartment, burning scented oil (rose water) to gods and protectors -joined the gym, did lots of cardio and steam room, (which did not make me feel any better, but the heavy sleep seems to help alot) -taken it as easy as I could, distractions (even though its so hot and croweded here in high season.)  There must be more steps one could take.  I'm curious if anyone else has been out of whack lately, since a Kundalini friend tells me so as well. Also offer your theories on what may be behind all this. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
manitou Posted July 14, 2011 Are there unusual circumstances going on in your life at this time? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
de_paradise Posted July 14, 2011 Nothing unusual in the mundane life. Â Just after I posted this, I meditated on my bed doing the Tara mantra and made up a little meditation on the way, staying so long because it seemed to be going good. Then I somehow found myself in a voidness, and I started flying down. But as I flew I realized that I was going to ejaculate, so I tried to pull out of the state. Alas I spooged in the void, not sure how that works. But I didnt wake to consciousness, but into a dream state, and later finally I emerged back to this apartment. Â Not really sure, but I hope this is Tara or my higher mind helping a guy out. I was already seemed to be near the end of the "flu", but now feel much better. Â Draw your own conclusions about semen retention making a guy go nutty in the high summer, about Tara, about it all. Who knows. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
suninmyeyes Posted July 14, 2011 (edited) Loss of apetite could be due to the heat. Unusual circumstances in life?-(listen to the detective manitou )is a good start. Secondly,is your general health good? Â If yes than,is there something that is bothering you,some deep unsolved issue?Something you were meant to be doing and you just never did,or some realtionship that never healed,or is there something you keep on putting up with but you would rather not?(of course I am not expecting you to answer that becouse it could be deeply personal) This is what I would ask myself in such situation. Food ,are you sensitive to some foods,if yes certain foods could have a negative effect that shows in many ways(one of my big problems)? Sometimes detox does go deeper and deeper,so you never know could be that,even if you have detoxed loads already. Get better soon ! Edited July 14, 2011 by suninmyeyes Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Harmonious Emptiness Posted July 14, 2011 (edited) Strange and difficult week, friends.  Symptoms:  -complete loss of apetite, the thought of food made me feel un-hungry -muscle tension (normally I do yoga and vocal singing exercises, so I am exactly aware of how many muscles should be, I could not sing due to the tension, and yoga was hard going) -nightmares, somehow caused by a base fear and negativity. -misery, negative thinking, torpor. -lack of concentration, memory and senses like eye function -energy getting vamped everywhere, want to avoid eye contact or proximity of people.  Meditations: good Physical energy: good   Are you eating a lot of meat? That can cause some of these things. Do you do qi gong? I would recommend doing some. 5 treasures is great -- brings in lots of positive energy to all 3 dantiens, and has a nice balance of purging/gathering energy.  http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=1572962536605659291#  I've posted this link quite a bit, but it's good, and resembles some of the general movements of many other systems.  Depending on the system or teacher you're following, ejaculation retention is not necessarily detrimental. What I've taken from reading is that you just need to find you personal balance. If you have a partner there's a lot more flexibility, and age is also a determining factor, but find out what your personal range is. If you have the same energy while doing retention for less time, then it's probably okay. Some people feel tired and down if they lose it more than once a couple times a week. Some people are run out if they lose it more than once a month. You might have different instructions, but this is a more laymen approach to it. It's good to be at peak physical energy, but being all pent up can cause other issues which make it more difficult to stabilize the spirit, and that might be worse. Some people are better able to manage, but it's something to consider. Abdominal breathing and qi gong can help bring back the energy balance too. You might be overdoing the retention, but that's something for you and your instructor to decide. If you're on a path/program for some seriously high level stuff, then I wouldn't be the one to give you advice about this... Edited July 14, 2011 by Harmonious Emptiness Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Informer Posted July 15, 2011 Sounds like it could be kundalini symptoms. Do you feel the third eye? Â I would guess that you are overworking the higher centers, and need to work on the lower ones. Â When you have a reserve of energy, it creates a sort of shield around you that gets stronger as you train, and you won't be as susceptible to other energy influence. Â I think the nightmare may prove that you have some unresovled issues that you should attend to. It may be as simple as paying more attention to your dreams or as deep as actions that you still regret and haven't let go of. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
de_paradise Posted July 15, 2011 Loss of apetite could be due to the heat. Unusual circumstances in life?-(listen to the detective manitou )is a good start. Secondly,is your general health good? Â If yes than,is there something that is bothering you,some deep unsolved issue?Something you were meant to be doing and you just never did,or some realtionship that never healed,or is there something you keep on putting up with but you would rather not?(of course I am not expecting you to answer that becouse it could be deeply personal) This is what I would ask myself in such situation. Food ,are you sensitive to some foods,if yes certain foods could have a negative effect that shows in many ways(one of my big problems)? Sometimes detox does go deeper and deeper,so you never know could be that,even if you have detoxed loads already. Get better soon ! Â Thanks dear. And thanks people for your input. Probably it was detox of a deep issue, or too much pressure from the climate and the semen retention. Theres alot of other details but, its mainly gone away. Â What a hard week it was, I really learned just how fragile our sanity can be when our energies are acting strange. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites