Taoist Relationships

[witch]

teacher!

 

and I repeat

 

:lol:

 

All right, that was sexist of me.

 

 

 

 

[witch]

I should explain the source of my prejudice. From poking around here and other places, the problem with taoist men is that they are doing something unnatural. Most are trying to get their sexual energy up into the top of their craniums.

 

Some are here because they heard getting sixth chakra energy will help them pick up chicks in bars. I'm not kidding about this. It's a somewhat popular pick-up artist technique.

 

Some are here because they want kewl siddhis. Not pointing any fingers or anything. But someone who classifies women in the same category as cigarettes and strong drink doesn't understand the goddess nature of women. Or of people in general, for that matter.

 

Some fry their nether regions through bad technique, and then they get all testy () and belligerent and have physical difficulties too.

 

Some manage to get their energy to rise, but then get kundalini psychosis, causing hypersexuality and delusions of grandeur. Not that I'm throwing stones on that one!

 

Some do manage to get it to the top of their heads, and then it can drive them bananas.

 

Some get it to the top of their heads and then that's all they want to do, have crown chakra orgasms. Not really circulating the energy.

 

And finally, the ones who do manage to get the energy up safely to their heads, transmuted, are usually doing it under the tutelage of a celibate teacher. And those monk teachers tend to have a dim view of women. The attitude tends to rub off.

 

Most taoist men are fine, but it's no wonder that you came up with a few bad apples.

[GreytoWhite]

Some manage to get their energy to rise, but then get kundalini psychosis, causing hypersexuality and delusions of grandeur. Not that I'm throwing stones on that one!

 

Some do manage to get it to the top of their heads, and then it can drive them bananas.

 

Hey! I resemble that remark... it helped a lot when I met my ex. She needed that excess yang I had. I'm still sad she decided cocaine and ecstasy were more worthwhile than her own health and our relationship.

[TheGoldenFlower]

Ooops I didn't mean teach me bedroom arts as us 40 something year old women can be extremely orgasmic and don't need lessons. I meant I was seeking a Qigong Adept who was a high level cultivator to share knowledge of internal alchemy and qigong..

Edited September 14, 2011 by TheGoldenFlower

[GreytoWhite]

Go cougar...

 

Rawr!

 

[witch]

 

 

 

Ooops I didn't mean teach me bedroom arts as us 40 something year old women can be extremely orgasmic and don't need lessons. I meant I was seeking a Qigong Adept who was a high level cultivator to share knowledge of internal alchemy and qigong. I guess I thought men who were late 50's to early 60's would love to find a woman 20 years younger to be devoted partner on the way. I realize now I was just interfering with their search for some young jing.

 

Wasn't trying to teach you bedroom arts--my prejudice is that most women are naturally better at internal alchemy than almost all men. Very sexist, but I think our different wiring makes it easier for women. There are exceptions, but usually those exceptions have had many female teachers. I'd say the writer of The Jewel in the Lotus knows his stuff. He's a tantric yoga master rather than a taoist, but understands feminine energy flow.

 

Qigong, on the other hand, is much more impersonal. Lots of high-level qigong classes out there--probably would work better to go to a high-level class where you can check out the energy of your fellow students in person. That way you can avoid the hypersexual, delusions of grandeur middle-aged taoists who want 22-year-olds (and boy are they out there). High-level qigong students probably either are already practicing internal alchemy or would be very open to learning about it.

Edited September 8, 2011 by witch

[Friend]

Edited November 16, 2011 by Friend

[Creation]

Wasn't trying to teach you bedroom arts--my prejudice is that most women are naturally better at internal alchemy than almost all men. Very sexist, but I think our different wiring makes it easier for women.

Hi witch.

 

I'm not sure how generally you are using the term "inner alchemy", but as far as Taoist nei dan is concerned, here is some reading that you may find very interesting:

 

http://taijidandao.blogspot.com/2011/04/musings-on-longmen-dandao-part-2.html

 

Here is a teaser:

The readers have probably realized from reading this blog and also from my previous post that most of the inner alchemy phenomenons described are experiences from female cultivators and in fact most of the advanced level students of Shen laoshi are female. The reason is simply that female practitioners progress much faster than male in inner alchemy. Readers who have experience in other forms of qigong might also notice a similar phenomenon. But why do women progress so much faster than men? I have seen this question being discussed on various Internet forums but none of the rationals given that I have seen really got to the heart of the question (in my opinion anyway). So let me reveal here the real reason behind it. The main reason that women progress faster in inner alchemy (in Longmen Pai tradition anyway) is that women has a lower field already! Where? Their uterus! It's not surprising uterus is also known as the "Big Cauldron" in certain doaist classic texts. Let me explain further...

[Andrei]

Ooops I didn't mean teach me bedroom arts as us 40 something year old women can be extremely orgasmic and don't need lessons. I meant I was seeking a Qigong Adept who was a high level cultivator to share knowledge of internal alchemy and qigong. I guess I thought men who were late 50's to early 60's would love to find a woman 20 years younger to be devoted partner on the way. I realize now I was just interfering with their search for some young jing.

 

Maybe Michael Winn is the man for you, he's looking too for a Deva

[Taomeow]

Keep in mind that most men who present themselves as taoists are just Westerners who like the label and wear it over whatever they really are without this "whatever they are" being affected in the least. Some have picked up a few abhorrently wrong sexual practices from rather questionable sources. Most are circumcised and quite unaware that none of the taoist texts have ever been geared toward circumcised men, who need a totally different practice. Real taoist bedchamber arts manuals have not been translated, to my knowledge, the ones that are available are mostly bull, or else fragmented snippets of knowledge useless in the absence of the whole enchilada.

 

The only real taoists of supreme attainment whom I've met (not sexually, alas, all three are happily married) are plain vanilla sex-wise. Just like me. Sex has been invented by tao "first and foremost" -- it is the core of her most cherished endeavors -- so anyone trying to reinvent it, "improve" on it, make it "beat the real thing" better be VERY sure that they know what they're doing better than tao does. Tao invented plain vanilla. The very best chocolate syrup on top is useless if the ice cream itself is something you can't taste. Strawberries and cream on top are only masking the fact. Learn to taste it as is -- if you can't, that's your practice, learning what tao means when she says "sex." (I mean a generic "you," not anyone personally and particularly.)

[Harmonious Emptiness]

Real taoist bedchamber arts manuals have not been translated, to my knowledge, the ones that are available are mostly bull, or else fragmented snippets of knowledge useless in the absence of the whole enchilada.

 

 

Could you say a bit more about this? Where did you learn this? What else do you know about the real manuals (maybe the sect, or who reads them, their names, anything else)?

 

thanks.

[Informer]

Most are circumcised and quite unaware that none of the taoist texts have ever been geared toward circumcised men, who need a totally different practice. Real taoist bedchamber arts manuals have not been translated, to my knowledge, the ones that are available are mostly bull, or else fragmented snippets of knowledge useless in the absence of the whole enchilada.

 

What alchemical practice has anything to due with the penis being circumsized or not?

 

I'm calling bullshit that it even matters.

 

In the context that is presented it makes for a pretty broad statement.

 

What does foreskin have to do with internal workings? Where is it stated anywhere that this is so?

Edited September 8, 2011 by Informer

[corbin]

I am just speaking for myself, in my experience one has to find out why the relationships they have been in to this point have failed. I had two failed marriages, and almost gave up on love all together, before I came to the place where I looked into myself and realized that I was picking these types of relationships that always ended bad. This realization freed me, and I was then able to see more clearly what I really was looking for in a relationship.

[FixXxer1846]

I really get that men are visually attracted and there needs to be chemistry yet I feel ones soul, energy and radiant personality shines beyond the physical and I have meet many "beautiful" people that were ugly on the inside. I plan on living a very long healthy life so I want to grow old gracefully with a man who is not shallow but deeply able to see my souls essence.

 

Any thoughts from fellow Taoist on the way?

 

Well, I think Tulku or Non would definitely be interested in you.

 

But my guess you have more success with Facebook. Haha. Plenty of nice men out there. They don't even have to be spiritual. A beautiful woman as you can easily convince 'em to diligently practice the microcosmic orbit everyday until they can do in the bedroom what you expect of them (exchange energies and such). Few men would be interested in all the philosophical, theoretical aspects of spirituality though, but that probably also goes for most women.

[RiverSnake]

The better women you are the better man you will attract (practice cultivation).

 

Also i agree that sex and relationships can be very spiritual...after all it is simply a lesser expression of our subconscious higher desire for UNION.

 

However i think there is a very important distinction to make in relationships...it is important to realize that relationships are better and more joyful if they are an expression of your love and joy rather than a means for attaining joy and happiness. Otherwise the relationship becomes parasitic.

 

Also it is important to acknowledge that you can no more hold on and keep a partner than you can hold on to the air in your lungs, if you try to do so and keep a man in your pocket only suffering awaits.

 

-My 2 cents and now a video!!!!

 

 

Edited September 9, 2011 by OldGreen

[TheGoldenFlower]

Thank you for all the variety of responses as we are all so unique in our expression and words can be taken in so many ways.I am overflowing with love and joy and do not need a partner to feel happy as I am content. I do have an abundance of sexual energy and I feel it is healthy for me to share that if even if through subtle sex. I get asked to go out on dates a lot but I am not interested in casual sex as making love is sacred to me and part of my spirituality. The internet does not feel like a natural way to connect because there is not that instant magnetic soul attraction and as I have come to realize many older men are searching for women much younger with very specific beauty to satisfy them. I am seeking one that sees way beyond the physical realm. I wanted advice on a Taoist forum and now realize even men who consider themselves to be high level cultivators have different intentions and motivations.

 

I am just going to focus on my spiritual life and meditating as that is really the only thing in the world for me worth pursuing.Cultivating humility, compassion and virtue is what I am putting my energy into.

Edited September 9, 2011 by TheGoldenFlower

[Taomeow]

Could you say a bit more about this? Where did you learn this? What else do you know about the real manuals (maybe the sect, or who reads them, their names, anything else)?

 

thanks.

 

Besides oral transmissions from my teachers, I've gleaned some information from a few sources, of which the one I have handy to reference here is titled "Book of Changes and Traditional Chinese Medicine," by Yang Li, published by Beijing Science and Technology Press in 1998. The translation is absolutely atrocious, but the information is invaluable. Here's the title page credentials: "Yang Li, professor at the Graduate Department of the TCM Institute of China, is a well-known expert in Yi science and TCM theorist. Her works have made great contributions to the dissemination of Chinese culture. (...) The Book of Changes and Traditional Chinese Medicine was awarded the World Golden Prize of Taiji Science in 1993 (...), the National Prize for Outstanding Books on Science and Technology, (and a bunch of others.) (...)"

 

Chapter 24 of this work titled "Book of Changes and Sexology" references a number of important Chinese/taoist works on sexology dating from the most ancient times, and outlines the basic principles and practices of healthy, healing, and cultivation-geared sexual activities as understood by these authentic sources. Of note is Section 5 -- "The Application of the Decrease-Increase Theory to sexual techniques recorded in the book Effective Prescriptions," but the whole chapter is worth the closest attention, as well as the whole volume, although I predict sound and fury over the way translators (who are several, Chinese, and inconsistent in their use of English terms chapter to chapter, on top of having no clue of the already-established ways to translate particular Chinese terms and concepts into English, on top of multiple other linguistic and semantic transgressions against humanity) have made much of it quite a bit more cryptic than it was ever meant to be.

[Harmonious Emptiness]

 

 

Chapter 24 of this work titled "Book of Changes and Sexology" references a number of important Chinese/taoist works on sexology dating from the most ancient times, and outlines the basic principles and practices of healthy, healing, and cultivation-geared sexual activities as understood by these authentic sources.

 

Thanks for your response Taomeow

 

if it's not too much trouble, would you mind posting the names of these texts? I'm only aware of 2 or 3.

[Friend]

Edited November 16, 2011 by Friend

[konchog uma]

Thank you for all the variety of responses as we are all so unique in our expression and words can be taken in so many ways.I am overflowing with love and joy and do not need a partner to feel happy as I am content. I do have an abundance of sexual energy and I feel it is healthy for me to share that if even if through subtle sex. I get asked to go out on dates a lot but I am not interested in casual sex as making love is sacred to me and part of my spirituality. The internet does not feel like a natural way to connect because there is not that instant magnetic soul attraction and as I have come to realize many older men are searching for women much younger with very specific beauty to satisfy them. I am seeking one that sees way beyond the physical realm. I wanted advice on a Taoist forum and now realize even men who consider themselves to be high level cultivators have different intentions and motivations.

 

I am just going to focus on my spiritual life and meditating as that is really the only thing in the world for me worth pursuing.Cultivating humility, compassion and virtue is what I am putting my energy into.

 

hahaha it seems like high level cultivators are the ones to look out for

 

"SWM taoist aged 135 seeks young fit high school students for romping good times. must like chin whiskers."

 

i think dropping all concern for finding a mate is a great idea. life takes care of us, and when we turn our wants and needs over, it provides for us, in my experience. plus, even if you're meant to be alone for a while, best to accept it and not dwell on finding a man right? best wishes to you

[Friend]

Edited November 16, 2011 by Friend

[witch]

Thank you for all the variety of responses as we are all so unique in our expression and words can be taken in so many ways.I am overflowing with love and joy and do not need a partner to feel happy as I am content. I do have an abundance of sexual energy and I feel it is healthy for me to share that if even if through subtle sex. I get asked to go out on dates a lot but I am not interested in casual sex as making love is sacred to me and part of my spirituality. The internet does not feel like a natural way to connect because there is not that instant magnetic soul attraction and as I have come to realize many older men are searching for women much younger with very specific beauty to satisfy them. I am seeking one that sees way beyond the physical realm. I wanted advice on a Taoist forum and now realize even men who consider themselves to be high level cultivators have different intentions and motivations.

 

I am just going to focus on my spiritual life and meditating as that is really the only thing in the world for me worth pursuing.Cultivating humility, compassion and virtue is what I am putting my energy into.

 

The Internet is a very unnatural way to connect for a relationship. I can learn more about someone in five minutes in a room than spending five months corresponding with them online. I know it is inappropriate for me to give advice here, as I am interested in different things than you are and I'm very low plane, but I do think both things I have said here apply:

• 
   
  
• Meet high-level cultivators in person, maybe in a class or a conference
  
• Focus on what you want, not what they want. Being forty brings discernment that a younger woman does not have.
  

 

Just focusing on your own spiritual development is great for spiritual development, but not so great for meeting new people. It's very unlikely you will meet a nice high-level cultivator shopping for groceries.

[Dainin]

.

Edited October 13, 2011 by Dainin

[Friend]

Edited November 16, 2011 by Friend

[TheGoldenFlower]

I hope I did not sound judgmental of Taoists men as that was not my intention. Everyone has the right to be attracted to whomever they want to be and better to know right away what someone is seeking.

Edited September 14, 2011 by TheGoldenFlower