Material desire is Illusion

[fiveelementtao]

I tried your approach of analyzing how my subconscious effected my life in such profound and deceivingly ways. Just like you analyzing my thoughts. You really encouraged me to go deep into the subconscious, I thank you for that.

 

The thing is, I've already gone trough that and it didn't really have a lasting effect. It left me with a feeling of awe to the power of subconscious and hopelessness. Knowing the cause of disharmony doesn't really solve it?

 

Well, I don't know what you mean by you've "already gone through it" that can mean almost anything from "I read a few books" to "I spent 10 years in therapy" If you had really gone through it, you would not still be struggling with the problem. It is natural to want to minimize the problem. Of course there weren't any lasting effects. It has taken you your whole life to create these subconscious patterns and defense mechanisms. They aren't going to disappear after a few days or even months of analysis. This stuff doesn't go away easily or immediately. Analyzing the subconscious is only the first step. Then comes the years and years of continuing to work through the emotional pain of unraveling the pain we cause ourselves....

 

One important thing I wish to share with you from my experience working through similar issues is that it won't go away anytime soon. It will take years and years of thorough and diligent work, perhaps the rest of your life and IME, you will need objective help from a counselor or a therapist. You are not qualified to treat yourself. I myself have been in some form of therapy for over 30 years. I have no intention to stop. I see a counselor twice a month. The new age idea that we can investigate a spiritual path or read some books or chant a mantra and all are problems vanish is not a traditional spiritual understanding. The process of enlightenment takes years and years of diligent practice with the help of others...

[fiveelementtao]

I'm currently very happy, you must understand.

 

Oh.. Well, then disregard everything I have said... Good luck...

[Everything]

Well, I don't know what you mean by you've "already gone through it" that can mean almost anything from "I read a few books" to "I spent 10 years in therapy" If you had really gone through it, you would not still be struggling with the problem. It is natural to want to minimize the problem. Of course there weren't any lasting effects. It has taken you your whole life to create these subconscious patterns and defense mechanisms. They aren't going to disappear after a few days or even months of analysis. This stuff doesn't go away easily or immediately. Analyzing the subconscious is only the first step. Then comes the years and years of continuing to work through the emotional pain of unraveling the pain we cause ourselves....

 

One important thing I wish to share with you from my experience working through similar issues is that it won't go away anytime soon. It will take years and years of thorough and diligent work, perhaps the rest of your life and IME, you will need objective help from a counselor or a therapist. You are not qualified to treat yourself. I myself have been in some form of therapy for over 30 years. I have no intention to stop. I see a counselor twice a month. The new age idea that we can investigate a spiritual path or read some books or chant a mantra and all are problems vanish is not a traditional spiritual understanding. The process of enlightenment takes years and years of diligent practice with the help of others...

Its hard to explain. Its like one moment the problem may arise, but when I wake up the problem is still there but it no longer affects me. I don't think I should try to explain... I'm just at peace with everything. Even with pain. Ugh... This needs more thought. Maybe another time.

[Everything]

Oh.. Well, then disregard everything I have said... Good luck...

I can't. Its already part of me. I treat everything of equal value. Your words were read with my fullest attention, but these words I write is void of that attention to your earlier texts. Thank you again

[fiveelementtao]

but these words I write is void of that attention to your earlier texts. Thank you again

I have no idea what that means, but I hear your request to leave you alone and I will honor that. Good luck...

[tulku]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=outiYpazvcA

My body is a cage that keeps me
From dancing with the one I love
But my mind holds the key

[Everything]

I have no idea what that means, but I hear your request to leave you alone and I will honor that. Good luck...

Hehe. I just make some desperate attempts to explain the source of me. I don't recall why I overcame the mental disorders. I want to understand my self. Because I began this journey not for me, that much I know. It sux when you can't understand why you are so much more content with everything compared to most people. Without clinging to pleasure. I guess its related to my inability to recall. Now it seems that the whole world around me has borderline disorder. Not to sound arrogant.

 

There is this artist in my mind, I forgot her name. She had borderline, and she actually uses the symptons for her music! The extreme emotions produce emotional music. Maybe bach's music in the form of fugues is based on this complimentary mental disorder, hehe. Its hard to explain. All has to do with polarities. Bach is a mason, he believed "as above, so below"

 

Thanks for the kind words, tulku.

[Everything]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=outiYpazvcA

 

My body is a cage that keeps me

From dancing with the one I love

But my mind holds the key

I just wanted to say that its the other way around for me. My mind a cage that keeps me from dancing with the one I love. But my heart and body holds the key to rythm.

 

I saw an old friend at a party, he refused to dance because he was thinking. I dragged him around the room, and he woulden't dance. His mind went in circles, I can't dance!

 

Did you know that a believe is Idea that is glued to emotions? It attracts more ideas. I asked this to a person who was trained to beat a lying detector. Te brain is measured for extra activity or less. When there is less, it means you don't really believe it like the other things you did believe.

 

If you don't believe anything, everything becomes equal. This is a confusing road to walk upon. It doesn't even exist in words, such a road. Your believes forms a map of this reality. So that everything becomes simple and easy to react to. Without this map of reality you're lost. Have no ground to stand upon. This is why most people go back to the ground. Where I have learned to fly. Constantly maintaining a state of confusion. I can change believes like they were never even a believe but a thought. The growth of a believes I do in minutes that takes others years. Its like you are free to create whatever thought you want at any given moment, if only you accept that everything fake. That reality is real, but not unchanging like you've thought.

 

So you start to say "I can dance." I often addopt realities from other peoples mind, temporary. Wity dancing, I become micheal jackson. The regularr mind would say"no you idiot! You cannot be micheal jackson!" and this are those moments where I find it hard to resist revealing the truth to other people. Because micheal jackson is relative, and ths I can become him. In my eyes, then I will truely become everything I thought he truely was. I just begin the journey of a thousands steps, and with one step I know I've finished it. The truth is we will vecome micheal jackson in the eyes of many, eventually. if we keep believing it. That is how nature works. Believing is your most important tool. And it is done not trough the mind, but heart.

Edited September 17, 2011 by Everything