Why are there fewer women than men in search of Enlightenment and Freedom from Samsara?

[SunLover]

In case all of you think I am starting a Misogynist troll thread , please summon the patience to hear me out and analyze my words with a critical questioning mind. I am starting this thread in response to the Normals just don't care thread and I found some posts in that thread to be particularly enlightening,

 

For eg, Gerard said this. Souls need to experience suffering many times before they can awaken to the Dharma and highly-refined spiritual practices. Baby and young souls have no interest in spiritual matters, they just want to enjoy being in a body. I like to apply this statement of his to my observations of human women over the last decade or so of my life

 

I was lucky enough to encounter women of many different countries and races. What I find in common between women of all races and from all countries is that women are more prone to loneliness than men. There is a bigger gaping hole in the emotional heart of most women than men. This is why most women are more prone to loneliness than men,

 

To make up for this loneliness, women tend to splurge on clothes, cosmetics, jewellery and the next hot iphone etc etc etc. It is like they want to buy all these items to make themselves more appealing and/or to fill a hole in their psyche. Almost every woman I have met suffered a huge attack to her confidence if you say that she is not as attractive as the next woman. Almost every woman I have met prides herself on her looks even if they do not say so. Ever seen how women behave when a real 10 Hot Babe enters the room? Talk about throwing daggers.

 

It is just that women are much more attached to the material realm than most men. Women seem to have more material desires than men. And I am not just talking about desires for money or clothes or jewellery or food. Desires for a family, for a child, for a man are as much material desires as desires for material goods.

 

Gerard said that most souls do not awaken to the teachings of the dharma until they have suffered enough. A few other posters have made claims in the same thread saying they can't find women of like-mined interests.

 

I am gonna say something right now which will piss off the feminists in this forum but I am still gonna say it anyway. Women have been suffering for the past few thousand years because their souls have chosen a life of suffering so that they would wake up to the Dharma, to Enlightenment and to Freedom of Samsara. Only pain and suffering would awaken a soul to the delusions that make up this world. Why do you think women are so deeply desired in their youth and their appeal go down the tube as they age? This is because the souls of most women chose to suffer more than men in this lifetime. How do you think you will feel when your attractiveness go down the drain as you age?

 

There is just a lesser number of developed souls in women than in men. Just look at the priests and monks around the world. Why are there more men who is willing to forsake everything in the world in their search for God? Why aren't there as many women as men who are willing to forsake everything in their search for God? Just ask yourself this question and meditate deeply on this subject.

Edited October 23, 2012 by SunLover

[Marblehead]

Okay. So you are educated. You are also, IMO, misguided.

 

I will hold what else I might say until others have had the chance to comment.

[Gerard]

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Edited September 13, 2013 by Gerard

[Nikolai1]

I think the first thing I would say is that I think women are indeed more materialistic than men, but this does not mean that they are any the less spiritual. The true opposite of the philosophical term material is ideal and in religious language these might be translated as earth and heaven respectively. the spiritual search for enlightenment and samsara is the search for the material and ideal to be united according to the religious formula: samsara is nirvana, or the kingdom of heaven is at hand.

 

Before this union is achieved I think women tend to root their spiritual practise in the material realm through acts of love, good deeds etc. It takes time for them to realise that spiritual life is more than just making other people happy and comfortable while they live on earth.

 

On the other hand men can be overly idealistic and root their practice in what seem to women abstract formulations of theologies, systems and laws.

 

The female way might be thought of goodness and the male way the way of wisdom. But, as I said, the aim of both paths is to realise that being kind needs a wise and sober understanding of the situation if we are not to make it worse, and that all the wisdom in the world is useless without anyone to benefit from it.

 

I therefore can't agree that fewer women seek enlightenment. It can however appear that way if we understand that path to enlightenment in an overly male way. This can also lead to one-sided evaluations of female behaviour. For example:

 

Almost every woman I have met prides herself on her looks even if they do not say so.

 

Actually I agree with this, but I also think that they are less likely to judge men on their looks. men on the other hand can be quite unvain in themselves but find themselves quite harshly judging an unattractive woman. Each gender is therefore guilty in their own way but in a way that complements the virtue of the other. If we only see the negatives in the opposite gender we are missing the whole picture.

 

Why do you think women are so deeply desired in their youth and their appeal go down the tube as they age? This is because the souls of most women chose to suffer more than men in this lifetime.

 

Yes, I agree that the frustrations inherent in the female path will steer them towards the male path, and vice versa. I'm not so sure about this notion of choice but I certainly think that a young woman who seems overly invested in their appearance is in for a big and ultimately productive shock.

 

I think the materialistic nature of women can be so hard for men because it goes against everything that they feel to be right. But if we can come to terms with it and endorse it then it frees us up and makes us able to love women properly and deeply. We don't have to be afraid of what women represent, and so many women, especially the feminists, don't need to be afraid of us men.

 

best wishes, Nikolai

[Jetsun]

Traditionally women haven't been allowed to become priests and spiritual leaders etc because of misoginistic attitudes, so in public they may not seem to be as many women is search but privately that may be different.

 

But what the Dalai Lama has been saying recently is that in reality women have many advantages over men for cultivation in the Tibetan way at least because they have the stronger child rearing instinct which can be used to connect with compassion, so he is always encouraging women to become more responsible and take advantage of this, but really the Tibetans aren't much better for sexist attitudes as there was only ever about one nunnery to hundreds of male monasteries so they can't talk.

 

But it could be that women and men express their egotism in different ways, Gurdjieff used to talk about "Madame vanity and Monsieur self-love" as two of the main expressions of egotism, but you can certainly find many examples of how men are more vain and materialistic these days.

[三江源]

Men like cars and videogames and wearing beanies, looking at women,beer and masturbation.

 

Women like deep and endless amounts of orgasms,babies, shoes, shopping, lipstick and sweet drinks.

 

Translate this this to Gods and Goddesses, Yin and Yang.

[Mokona]

Really? Since when was such a general and wide-sweeping blanket statement any sort of true? We are talking about personal opinion here obviously, and the thread was started by a troll. You people will feed anything, won't you?

[Stosh]

Men like cars and videogames and wearing beanies, looking at women,beer and masturbation.

 

Women like deep and endless amounts of orgasms,babies, shoes, shopping, lipstick and sweet drinks.

 

Translate this this to Gods and Goddesses, Yin and Yang.

 

 

Im quite surprised at your expression of stereotype there.

Very tempting to respond in kind.

I dont know if its trolling , I see it as button pushing

I also dont know Tulku-sunlovers full history here

I guess I see him as our own angel-demon right out of the book of the dead.

 

Stosh

Edited October 23, 2012 by Stosh

[idiot_stimpy]

The more you suffer the more you search for answers?

 

Men are more egocentric, hence suffer more and have a higher rate of searching for the truth?

[Stosh]

Scientific studies Ive seen suggest that men are more satisfied and happy with their

lives and families than are women,, (but I didnt do the polling.)

Stosh

[三江源]

Scientific studies Ive seen suggest that men are more satisfied and happy with their

lives and families than are women,, (but I didnt do the polling.)

Stosh

 

True. And the majority of divorces are instigated by women and single women live longer than married women, and married men live longer than single men.

[Jetsun]

Ken Wilber says that the basic drive of women is to be full, full of relationships etc while with men it is to be free, which is represented in the way the sexual energy is configured. How this transfers into the spiritual search I'm not sure but it is interesting to contemplate.

[Stosh]

True. And the majority of divorces are instigated by women and single women live longer than married women, and married men live longer than single men.

 

Would this not emphasize-underline women are not sucessfully

finding satisfaction in their relationships ,(coupled with not

looking for spiritual satisfaction elsewhere either?)

Why not?

It kind of suggests to me that men tend more to search and

find that which satisfies them ,or , they are satisfied with what they find.

Stosh

Edited October 23, 2012 by Stosh

[三江源]

[raimonio]

hahaha good post

 

like the fact that men have literally abused, plundered and downlooked women for thousands of years has no effect on anything, it was actually the women who wanted it, their fault right?

[skydog]

lol tulku why do you post this shit about freedom from samsara, get a life, do what you enjoy, love someone come back in a year.

 

peace out homay

[Stosh]

I cant really speak for thousands of years worth of behavior

It just seems like women are statistically blaming men for their situation

Angry loud unhappy old dude screaming to a much younger woman

with nice hair suffering it.

But it doesnt jive with dudes being more satisfied in their relationships really

unless you think all men are wife haters who love to be mean.

All the married men I know for the most par kow tow to their wives and joke it off.

Honey , do this honey do that (from the wife)

Husband says ,"Hey get me a beer sweetie" and the response is indignation.

[GrandmasterP]

Men are outnumbered about ten to one by women in our neck of the woods and that's always been the case. If you visit the temples it's the same far more women than men doing stuff. It's only online where you find mostly chaps posting and IMO quite a lot of those chaps are solo practitioners either because there's no centre nearby for them to attend or they prefer posting online and working on their own.

[Stosh]

_{That may be a telling statistic , men basically doing things on their own first.}

_{But exceptions dont disprove statistics ( though I dont have the statistics)}

_Stosh

[GrandmasterP]

Just back from visiting a Tai Chi teacher. Twelve in the class. One man all the rest women plus me a male visitor. Rare as hen's teeth are men in social cultivation situations.

Same with mediumship very few men working platforms never have been many. On the other hand in professional stage (theatre) mediumship the numbers are skewed as there are probably as many men as women doing that.

[三江源]

[Basher]

Basher is stepping away....... :wacko:

[GrandmasterP]

I post on here and on Dharma Wheel (a big Buddhist site). Women posters seem to be few and far between on either.

Par for the course I suppose. Men talk about it whereas women get on and 'do' it and save their chat for their chums when they meet up at temple or centre.

I do think anyone ONLY posting is missing out on the opportunities for growth and learning that come via being part of a real world group of like minded chums.

[三江源]

[GrandmasterP]

Hope that didn't come across as being 'anti-male' that wasn't intended. I'm a guy but gender being to an extent performative I love a good gossip as much as the next person and have always been social animal hence enjoy all things to do with centres and temples.