What to do when the Dark Night of the Soul hits

[skydog]

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Edited July 4, 2013 by skydog

[ChiForce]

Hmmm...what? You are just dealing with the sensational energy. If your body is good shape and pure (don't drink don't take drugs and etc), nothing should happen to you. In fact, it is a very blissful moment. But your mind??? Just wait until you begin to see your past life and how the past life karma begins to unfold itself before your eyes. How you are making decision solely out of your habitual energy of your past life!!!!! People around you may think of you "WTF is wrong with him???" You know full well that your inner self, along with your past life, must LIVE. It wants to live. That was the reason why you were reborn....

Edited July 4, 2013 by ChiForce

[WillingToListen]

 

haha makes you wonder if your crazy

[gendao]

What you can do is - keep the faith & focused on resolving whatever issues come up. I would recommend employing a combination of bodywork (like "brute force" acupressure) and "spiritual" psychotherapy for this..

 

...And then be prepared to do this for a few years!

 

 

[silent thunder]

...I love the wack-a-mole analogy.

Wack-a-mole is what I did for yeeeeears with my inner voices and the old tapes of religion/family/school.

I was and still am that guy in the car by himself having a full blown conversation with the inner voices.

Usually explaining with gusto why they are irrelevant and need to shut the fuck up...

Edited July 4, 2013 by silent thunder

[Flolfolil]

well i wouldn't do it for you but that is one of the few birthrights that people have, so you have my blessing - to live your life happily or to end it if you find that impossible. Good luck with whatever path you choose

[ChiForce]

When I was in my long dark nights, I used entheogens to rocket blast my self out of them - I have found that the best entheogen of all time (for me) is methoxatamine (MXE) - what it does it take you deep into your mind palace, and Kundalini will then bring everything you are to your surface for you to see in living color...you will do years of process work in mere weeks. You must be brave, as all your demons and angels will come out in full force, and you will experience hell as well as heaven. Becoming unattached and fearless is both a requisite and a result of this practice. Not for the faint of heart, but for true shamans and warriors, yes. Please do not take this as medical advice as any kind. No one has ever died off this stuff, even at doses 30x the usual dose...but if you have a tendency towards psychoses, and cannot control yourself - it might be bad...fortunately it is not like LSD or MDMA - you cant do anything on it, as your body becomes incapacitated for a while.

 

To those who preach against drugs - preach not to me, as my path is my own. Preach to others as you wish. Each to his own.

So, what wisdom, in the actual forms, have you discovered from you "medically" induced Kundalini energy rising?

[Songtsan]

oh, she was arising in me long before i did drugs of any type..didn't start drugs until i was 18. Basically drugs are simply a catalyst, that is all. The wisdom isn't anything that couldn't come from exercise, meditation, etc. It's simply a launching pad to use drugs (for some, not for all). You can say that I am lucky in that I was able to make use of them that way. Others can not. I don't know all the reasons why not, but some people are ok doing it, others can damage their entire beings. I am no expert on who is who.

[Songtsan]

my question is how to tell between spiritual crises and plain depression? i feel like i really need professional help but what could a psychologist possibly say about the supernatural crap i have to deal with?

 

usually not much, although some are more learned than others. Depression has roots on many levels. Bad chemistry often stems from unresolved issues, and unresolved issues can stem from bad chemistry. Genetics contribute. Probably best to deal with everything using all means - treat everything like a spiritual crisis and also like its purely chemical/physical/emotional/mental...treat issues from all angles - the worst you can do is overkill, and in this case, it won't be a big deal to pamper yourself from all angles.

[Songtsan]

song, have you read my first MXE trip report? it is in my personal practice journal on here. i think you would get a kick out of it

 

no - I will check it out - I should tell people about some of mine - but they are so crazy and awesome words cant do it justice I would be painting a 2-d rough sketch for a 4-D experience....

[WillingToListen]

well i wouldn't do it for you but that is one of the few birthrights that people have, so you have my blessing - to live your life happily or to end it if you find that impossible. Good luck with whatever path you choose

Cool. Good to know I have "your blessing", I don't know what I would've done without it.

[WillingToListen]

None of this represents who you truly are. If you could reverse the statements to all of the above, it still isn't you. You are so much more and so much less than all that.

 

Are you getting professional support at this time in your life? Working with a counselor or spiritual healer?

It's funny you should think that.

 

Working with drugs and razors beautiful.

[Songtsan]

I'm trying to get there soon. I don't believe it's exactly something you can work up to though.

I could pay you if you'd do me the honor. The one person who agreed to do it faked

 

 

I waited 24 years for some semblance of a "life" until I figured out I really didn't want one to begin with, I'd say I was fairly patient.

 

 

I am a virgin, never had a girlfriend.

I am 24.

I only cared about music and writing, "shakti" took those.

I don't have a car.

I don't have any friends, just a few acquaintances.

I don't have any other hobbies/interests besides those I lost.

I don't care for anything anymore, I work for no reason.

I just spend my money on weed/drugs, since it's the only way I have to get away from here.

My family is falling apart.

I am poor, no bank account.

No schooling beyond high school.

I don't care for any more relationships with people, or any more suffering.

I no longer care to experience/know anything more.

I am living when I rather not be.

 

Songtsan get your bullshit out of here, maybe a lot of people don't know what they want/wanted from life, I'm not one of those people.

 

weed is a crutch - i smoked it for 18 years...it robs you of your soul and passion. Weed leads to anhedonia...and amotivation. The best thing you can do with your life is to quit weed - you will be done with withdrawal symptoms in less than a week or two max...what other drugs are you doing?

[ChiForce]

oh, she was arising in me long before i did drugs of any type..didn't start drugs until i was 18. Basically drugs are simply a catalyst, that is all. The wisdom isn't anything that couldn't come from exercise, meditation, etc. It's simply a launching pad to use drugs (for some, not for all). You can say that I am lucky in that I was able to make use of them that way. Others can not. I don't know all the reasons why not, but some people are ok doing it, others can damage their entire beings. I am no expert on who is who.

Look, typically, people experience the kundalini energy rising from some extreme mental stress (a near death experience, or something really traumatic). For me, it was a prolonged period of self examination of myself and EVERYTHING around me. I managed to experience it when I successfully penetrated the skandha of forms and to let go after realizing the impermanence nature of forms. That's the wisdom I gained. Thereafter, past life karma and memories started to emerge. I began to question the identity of my physical form.

 

Look, if you haven't gained any wisdoms and insights about your world from your experiences, most likely something isn't right.... I don't know when you started to do drugs or what you take. You can't have a kundalini energy rising experience without acquiring wisdsoms and insights about the world, as far as I understand.

[Songtsan]

It's funny you should think that.

 

Working with drugs and razors beautiful.

 

I don't know if you read some of my other posts, but just a few short months ago I was scouting out bridges to jump from - finding the exact best spot to jump...thinking about taking some kind of drug that would knock me out and going out into the woods to freeze to death and hiding my body in a drainage pipe, considering buying an inflatable raft and going out onto the lake and putting a backpack full of rocks on and just diving in, tried plastic bags over my head, using nitrous oxide to knock my self out so I would suffocate, and was looking into buying a gram of heroin so i could OD...just about 4 months ago or so!!! So don't think I don't know what you are going through...

[skydog]

deal with your own shit, was only trying to help

Edited July 4, 2013 by skydog

[Songtsan]

Look, typically, people experience the kundalini energy rising from some extreme mental stress (a near death experience, or something really traumatic). For me, it was a prolonged period of self examination of myself and EVERYTHING around me. I managed to experience it when I successfully penetrated the skandha of forms and to let go after realizing the impermanence nature of forms. That's the wisdom I gained. Thereafter, past life karma and memories started to emerge. I began to question the identity of my physical form.

 

Look, if you haven't gained any wisdoms and insights about your world from your experiences, most likely something isn't right.... I don't know when you started to do drugs or what you take. You can't have a kundalini energy rising experience without acquiring wisdsoms and insights about the world, as far as I understand.

 

You are wrong...do your research - even Patanjali said that drugs were a way to attain an advanced stage of gnosis - what have you done? I know what I am talking about - please see the thread that Flofolil made on using entheogens...I will not discuss anything else with you on this subject. please remove your ignorance

 

EDIT: I just don't have the patience or any kindness when it comes to this type of ignorance. How many times do I have to state that entheogens are part of my religion!? Think of me as a native american doing peyote, or something similar - are you going to go talk shit to them? If you were a Buddhist and I had decided that Buddhism wasn't for me or for you, and told you to 'grow up' and 'get real' - wouldn't you think me a damned fool? I would. This is my spirituality folks. I am a shaman of sorts. Quit disrespecting my spiritual path and who I am.

Edited July 4, 2013 by Songtsan

[WillingToListen]

Cant really see how what I said was so different to what rainbow vein said.

 

Unneccessary swearing and insults really?

Your feelings aren't real.

[WillingToListen]

I don't know if you read some of my other posts, but just a few short months ago I was scouting out bridges to jump from - finding the exact best spot to jump...thinking about taking some kind of drug that would knock me out and going out into the woods to freeze to death and hiding my body in a drainage pipe, considering buying an inflatable raft and going out onto the lake and putting a backpack full of rocks on and just diving in, tried plastic bags over my head, using nitrous oxide to knock my self out so I would suffocate, and was looking into buying a gram of heroin so i could OD...just about 4 months ago or so!!! So don't think I don't know what you are going through...

Some of those are funny ^__^. It's obvious you weren't going to do it. I would've gotten it right already if they didn't find me bleeding.

 

Heroin's my best idea so far, the guy is like an hour out though and it's hard to get a ride. The only ride hahaha

[Flolfolil]

Cool. Good to know I have "your blessing", I don't know what I would've done without it.

You would probably be exactly the same. All i know is that when i want to kill myself, the best thing anyone has ever done for me is give up on me. i cry until i feel empty, and then happiness and insight arises from that mental state

[WillingToListen]

I don't really know what to say to you at this point.

Did you ever know?

[WillingToListen]

Hhahaha all this energy cultivation and manipulation, isn't theere a way to blow up my dantien or something?

 

Or a way I can make K fry my brain again, maybe even some permanent retardation this time? I'll take retardation if it's the closest I can get to death- it's like being elightened anyway ^__^

[WillingToListen]

You would probably be exactly the same. All i know is that when i want to kill myself, the best thing anyone has ever done for me is give up on me. i cry until i feel empty, and then happiness and insight arises from that mental state

I'm glad you care. One less thing I have in common with you or anyone else it seems.

 

What's taking me so long to become a serial killer hahaa ^__^

[Songtsan]

Some of those are funny ^__^. It's obvious you weren't going to do it. I would've gotten it right already if they didn't find me bleeding.

 

Heroin's my best idea so far, the guy is like an hour out though and it's hard to get a ride. The only ride hahaha

 

Actually I almost made it...I had the plastic bag filled with nitrous oxide and a belt tied around my neck, and was lying down on a plastic sheet so that if my body crapped itself in my death my mother wouldn't have to clean up anything. In the last few seconds before I passed out, the nitrous must have escaped, because I didnt black out, and my body freaked out and my arms damn near tore the plastic off by themselves. I went to the same bridge multiple times and counted the number of fence sections to know exactly where to jump - I told my mother I was planning on killing myself, my parole office, and my therapist - you dont talk about killing yourself unless you are serious on either doing it, or you are serious about seeking help - I was in between on a knife edge..closest I ever came in my life...I once had a gun and was about to shoot myself too. And also thought about the whole wrist slicing thing...I am really glad I didnt do it though.

[Songtsan]

Hhahaha all this energy cultivation and manipulation, isn't theere a way to blow up my dantien or something?

 

Or a way I can make K fry my brain again, maybe even some permanent retardation this time? I'll take retardation if it's the closest I can get to death- it's like being elightened anyway ^__^

 

I asked her the same thing hundreds of times - she wont (maybe cant) do it...if she wanted you dead she could probably make you kill yourself - nope, its all on you...