Meditation and sex

[GrandTrinity]

What do you think about during sex? I was making love the other day and practiing some healing sounds and even kan and li. Part of me thinks this is a bad idea. Does anyone else have experience meditating during sex?

Edited April 16, 2007 by GrandTrinity

[exorcist_1699]

As meditation requires quite a lot of spiritual concentration ( on peeling off endless layers of nothingness / emptiness) and physical strength( sit for hours) , I wonder how they co-exist .

[liminal_luke]

I don't have too much experience meditating during sex (except if you count energy spontaneously going up through microcosmic orbit), but I have done some meditating while giving bodywork--another activity that, like sex, becomes richer when I can be acutely present both to myself and the other person. This meditating while giving acupressure and chi nei tsang sessions was a suggestion of several teachers, and frankly I was a bit skeptical. Wouldn't focusing on myself by running the microcosmic orbit and even doing fusion etc, take me away from connecting with my client? Curiously, just the opposite occured. Although I wasnt paying as much attention in the normal outer way, the meditation seemed to allow a deeper--and automatic--connection to occur. My hands adjusted in subtle and precise ways that were in tune with the moment and worked, something that never would have happened in my normal non-meditative consciousness. Perhaps this applies to meditation during sex as well?

It might seem like a silly question, but what are you having sex for? Are you hoping to connect deeply with a partner emotionally and spiritually, or just have a little fun? And how does your meditation contribute or detract from your goal(s)? How does your meditation effect the quality of your experience with your partner? My guess is that if you can let the meditation bubble up through you as a spontaneous process that you've activated with all your previous spiritual work, without needing to unduly focus on the technical aspects, you'll find that meditating during sex will open up deeper levels of intimacy.

[GrandTrinity]

Liminal, Good questions and assessment of the situation, thanks!

 

What you say about the bodywork is quite enlightening too.

 

I had the same experience in which going deeper within made the love making deeper.

It was like I was having sex with - not just my partner but all of humanity, the earth, nature and the heavens.

 

I have felt real, real mellow since then, too (it was like raw kan and li energy channeled into the body). It did help that my partner is real spiritual and interested in this sort of thing.

 

It also helped that at times, the love was real relaxed and involved deep breathing as opposed to "fucking" or something like this that you might think involves shallow breathing.

 

I have read a number of books on the Tao of love, but none of that is like the lived experience!

[Spectrum]

Mentally release your attachments to the outcome of your actions. This translates usefully into many navigatable mediums of expression. Broadens experiential awarenesss of time (dilates), space (dilates) kinesthetics (enriches, deepens, dilates). Because of the amplification to your field through the truth of interaction experienced with another person it is advisable to leave as much of your luggage at home as possible. Take only what you need SkyWalker.

 

Spectrum

[voice]

When I began learning these methods I did try them during sex. But, unlike you, ended up with low-quality experiences.

 

Training and living can be two different things - we train in a controlled environment, and live in an uncontrolled one. Training in some martial arts may not help you in real life, if your opponent doesn't employ the same constraints that you trained under.

 

Training in an internal art, like Daoist practices, lets you explore your inner world in a controlled manner. Sex, is an uncontrolled situation - using some of our training practices in that situation can reduce the complexity of it. Indeed, reaching into the core of someone's being, as we do in sex, is a very priveleged setting, and to "do" things is to miss out on the great power and richness of that field.

 

Keeping the basic motivation of our practices, of developing communication between the inner and outer, is certainly key to fantastic sex. But I do it instinctively, like an animal -- sometimes in sex I follow an energetic track that dead ends, or we build an energetic field that dissipates, and so like an animal, go hunting in some other direction.

[thaddeus]

Does anyone else have experience meditating during sex?

I think it's called fantasizing about someone else.

[GrandTrinity]

Yeah, the cosmic being!

 

[Wayfarer64]

Here is a poem I wrote when I was 17 & very much In Love...

 

WHEN WE MAKE IT (1971)

 

When we make it gal

It's like always in the tree-tops

It's mudslidin' happy and warm river swimmin'

It's sunbeams dancing with rainbows and singin'

It's flowers spreading petals and flutes in deep woods

It's church-organ majestic and mmm-mmm good!

 

When we make it gal

We transcend like mantras

We're sky-born and gleefull

We may just go bonkers

We're in a dream state so peacefull (rockin' and rollin')

When we make it gal, it's like church bells a-tollin'...

 

When we make it gal

There aint a devil for miles 'cept me and I'm flyin'

There's no scent of bad apples or lost souls stopped tryin'

Aint a tear-drop or rain-drop, 'cept those the sun freed

Aint a bit of regret or bein' discrete

There's no cloud overhead or rock underneath,

No cloud overhead or rock underneath.

 

 

 

(Ah... to be young and in love...I sang in my chains like the sea)...Namaste-PDG