timelessness Posted September 2, 2013 How would you deal with a friend who is flirting with a girl you have a crush on. He knows that you have a crush on her. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Protector Posted September 2, 2013 Count his teeth  ...no, wait Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Basher Posted September 2, 2013 (edited) If they are a really close / trustworthy friend and they think that you're a bit shy, they might be trying to force your hand & get you to "Act" and ask her out for a drink, meal, etc yourself. Â Alternatively, they might also like her and might think that you'll never ask that girl out anyway. Â But there are plenty of people who flirt with just about everybody they meet. Now that might be because they think they're fantastic, or they have a HUGE....ego. It could even mean that THEY are a bit insecure themselves. Â But a crush doesn't really entitle you to any sense of ownership iro somebody else, does it ? A relationship is all about putting the other person first, in order to enjoy a "real" life together. Wishing / Hoping and having crushes doesn't IME get you very far in the Romance / Relationship department. Â I'm an ugly Old Fart, but I've had several good/great relationships in my lifetime. So there's hope for everyone. My advice (for what it's worth) is to casually go up & talk to her. Don't try to chat her up, or give her some corny old line you read in a dating book someplace, or act like a crazed stalker and follow her about. Just look into her eyes and talk to her casually, like it's no big deal and that you talk to girls like her all the time. Find out her likes / dislikes, hobbies...etc. and take it from there. Â If it works out....Great !!! But if she wants to just be friends, accept that. If she's not interested, you have to accept that too & move on. Â Sometimes these things happen when you least expect it ! Â Â (Or even better, do what Flo said) Â Â Edit: What Flo said Edited September 2, 2013 by Basher Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Flolfolil Posted September 2, 2013 lol...how -we- would deal with it wont make one bit of difference. follow your heart, etc etc.... 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Formless Tao Posted September 2, 2013 I would not deal with the friend. I would act on your feelings before you lose her to your friend.  "Knowing is not enough, we must do." Bruce Lee  My 2 cents from a person who has been in the same situation and won... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Thunder_Gooch Posted September 2, 2013 How would you deal with a friend who is flirting with a girl you have a crush on. He knows that you have a crush on her. Well you cannot call dibs on a girl, if you are twiddling your thumbs on making a move and your friend beats you to the punch, that is your fault. Â At the same time unless this girl is flirting with him, if he is going out of his way to to flirt with her, he is not your friend. Â I'd stop talking to him because you don't need ***holes like that in your life. Â I had one, I let him back into my life and it caused only more drama. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
abandonhope Posted September 2, 2013 Ask her to have lunch with you or dinner depending how friendly you guys are. Try to make it a really awesome date, make her laugh, and at the end tell her your true feelings. You will only be full of regret if you don't. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Cheshire Cat Posted September 2, 2013 How would you deal with a friend who is flirting with a girl you have a crush on. He knows that you have a crush on her.  Usually, brutal violence works in this kind of situations  2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Aetherous Posted September 2, 2013 Usually, brutal violence works in this kind of situations  Violence will save a friendship long before passive aggressive resentment and bitter silence will. Really. Be very direct and upfront with your friend, even to the point of having a physical fight. Do not let any bruised feelings smolder beneath the surface...release them. Only enemies and strangers hide the truth from each other and wait...so if you do that, your friend will feel like you're acting weird...not like a friend anymore. Air these things out. Sometimes men need to fight each other to grow in friendship and respect for each other as men...you will laugh about it later. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Friend Posted September 2, 2013 How would you deal with a friend who is flirting with a girl you have a crush on. He knows that you have a crush on her. More to ask how you are now dealing with the girl? More to ask why does he flirt when he know you have a crush? More to ask why not observe and see what they are talking, then you can start to talk next? More to ask was.... it count his teeth or was it count my teeth or count our teeth if she had already a friend? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Formless Tao Posted September 2, 2013 Usually, brutal violence works in this kind of situations  Violence will save a friendship long before passive aggressive resentment and bitter silence will. Really. Be very direct and upfront with your friend, even to the point of having a physical fight. Do not let any bruised feelings smolder beneath the surface...release them. Only enemies and strangers hide the truth from each other and wait...so if you do that, your friend will feel like you're acting weird...not like a friend anymore. Air these things out. Sometimes men need to fight each other to grow in friendship and respect for each other as men...you will laugh about it later.  "To win without fighting is best." Sun Tzu Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Celestial Posted September 3, 2013 There's a million fish in the sea. If you have a crush on her, I imagine you're really young. No adult says "crush" Â When you get older you'll realize that losing a friend over a "crush" was the wrong thing to do. Granted this "friend" of yours is someone of a value. How long have you been friends with this guy? Since childhood? Â The adult thing to do is just to let him know. If he doesn't listen, then he doesn't respect you, therefore he's not a true friend. Â Move on. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
timelessness Posted September 3, 2013 I used the word crush because I didn't know a better one. she is not my girlfriend... Just somebody I really like. Either way this guy lives with me. He has that sinister laugh because he knows that he is hanging out with the girl I like. I really want to kick his ass for betraying my trust. Â A decent person would have respected the boundry... A friend would have helped you talk to her. A good friend would have helped you set up a date... but this slimey bastard backstabbed me. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Celestial Posted September 3, 2013 It sounds like you already know what to do then. Move out and move on. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
timelessness Posted September 3, 2013 Move out? I want to kick him out. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
joeblast Posted September 3, 2013 he who does not apply his rudder and engine to the water simply becomes pushed around by the waves Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Flolfolil Posted September 3, 2013 Violence will save a friendship long before passive aggressive resentment and bitter silence will. Really. Be very direct and upfront with your friend, even to the point of having a physical fight. Do not let any bruised feelings smolder beneath the surface...release them. Only enemies and strangers hide the truth from each other and wait...so if you do that, your friend will feel like you're acting weird...not like a friend anymore. Air these things out. Sometimes men need to fight each other to grow in friendship and respect for each other as men...you will laugh about it later. Wow, this is the best argument for being confrontational i have ever heard Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
joeblast Posted September 3, 2013 but...one can assert himself without being a dick about it Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
KenBrace Posted September 4, 2013 Usually, brutal violence works in this kind of situations   lol Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Mudryah Posted September 6, 2013 How you get the the girl will set the tone of the relationship. This goes for anything you get in life. But in your situation you may need to compete for her time her love or something. If you talk with her but she chose your friend let it be. Â The energy you put out is what you get back and what is that called? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites