ganjaboy Posted October 24, 2013 greetings musings: I am a 19 yr old young male and I feel that i am becoming more of a man all the time. I feel the masculine force growing stronger in me day by day, the powerful yang resonance and heat affecting me in many ways. I was always a very internal, yin-child when i was a child. i loved art, pretty things, music, reading. I never paid much heed to the outside world. I am a Taurus, and hence, a late bloomer - i was slow to develop. Now, as I am rapidly becoming a man, BANG! there is this sudden imperative need to be a MAN and fit into this outside world. The mind psychology changes, the waves transition from theta to beta. I feel that my child is still there in the background, but the man I see looking back at me in the mirror is not that child, or even the adolescent. I feel the feelings of a fully developed man in me....the aggressive drive to compete, the primal sexual urges, but they make me feel very alone and hollow inside.... the love and spirit is missing. I feel the resonance so strong that I feel obligated to treat women with respect and decency, not because it is the right thing to do, but because i feel strong myself, strong enough to be weak. I want to fall back on my child-like creative pursuits once I am strong enough, because, at least to me, the greatest strength is in being able to indulge the love and whimsical passions of a child.... I meditate and practice qi-gong to work with the aggressive feelings and sexual heat. once those have been redirected to the heart i feel that i can act out of genuine compassion and kindness to others, not adolescent tantrums. The funny thing is that when i was a younger teenager, i did not have strong yang resonance, and it stopped me from doing my yin pursuits because i perceived them as too sensitive and weak. little did i know. I want to use the confidence i am gaining to be able to be strong enough to do my yin-pursuits ..... art, music. a basic principle is that yang attracts yin. does this sound logical and in-line with taoist teachings?? peace and thanks. dhiggs 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Protector Posted October 25, 2013 God, I hate labels Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ganjaboy Posted October 25, 2013 God, I hate labels ? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Brian Posted October 25, 2013 ? I think Protector is reacting to the implication in your post of some rigid definition of what it means to be a man. Worry less about "the rules and roles" and follow your heart and conscience. The idea of being strong enough to be weak is valid but don't get too hung up on any of it. As Master Wang said, remain calm, be a good & moral person, and practice your qigong daily... 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
liminal_luke Posted October 25, 2013 (edited) does this sound logical and in-line with taoist teachings?? Hi Dhiggs, It's natural enough, I suppose, to seek advice and feedback from others. Taobums is full of experienced and opinionated practitioneers of various paths so you are sure to hear many different views. I'd like to suggest though that you are the best and final judge of whether what you are thinking and doing makes sense for you. Clearly you are a thinking, self-aware person. Perhaps part of your emerging Manhood, as you put it, will be having greater confidence in your own wise counsel? If I might suggest a simple process. Ask yourself where you'd like to go, what you'd like to achomplish in life. Then think about the next small steps you will need to take to get yourself headed in that direction. Try some things out as an experiment, and keep track of how it goes. After a period evaluate the results of what you're doing and see if it's indeed working for you, or if you need to make modifications or go off on another path altogether. In this way you'll soon become an expert on your own process. You'll feel comfortable in your own skin, self-assured. Your path may not fit somebody else's idea of what's "taoist," or even logical--but it will be authentically your own. Just my two cents. Liminal Edited October 25, 2013 by liminal_luke 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
liminal_luke Posted October 25, 2013 I thought I had something of value to say so I spoke up. Sorry to hear you disagree. If Dhiggs wishes to hear only from taoist priests and their students he is free to ignore my posting and,well, no harm no foul. Ok, please forgive my momentary ranting. Back, I hope, to the subject at hand. Liminal Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
