BKA's guide on how to pickup women.... and lizard people

[Captain Mar-Vell]

...

 

... must resist.. pull to... the dark side...

 

...

[Sloppy Zhang]

Women don't like to be "hit on" by guys that make them feel like they're being hit on.

 

End of thread.

 

Bold are my fixes.

[Wells]

...

 

... must resist.. pull to... the dark side...

 

...

 

"to the Dark Triad", to name it correctly.

 

So what does the Dark Triad consist of?

 

Narcissism: characterised by grandiosity, entitlement, dominance and superiority (Corry, Merritt, Mrug, & Pamp, 2008).

The scale largely used to measure this trait is the Narcissistic Personality Inventory (NPI; Raskin & Hall, 1979).

 

Psychopathy: characterised by high levels of impulsivity and thrill-seeking along with low levels of empathy (Hare, 1985). It has been described as the most ‘malevolent’ of the Dark Triad (Rauthmann, 2012).

The scale which is largely used in the literature to measure Psychopathy is the Self-Report Psychopathy (SRP) scale, version III forthcoming (Paulhus, Neumann, & Hare). It was modelled on the Psychopathy Check List (Hare, 1991), which is largely seen as the ‘‘gold standard’’ for the measurement of forensic Psychopathy.

 

Machiavellianism: characterised as being cynical, unprincipled and using manipulation of others for self-gain and life success (Jones & Palhaus, 2009).

The scale which is most used to measure this construct is the Mach IV (Christie & Geis, 1970).

 

Global measures of the triad have recently been created such as the Dirty Dozen, a 12 item scale (Jonason & Webster, 2010) and the Short Dark Triad, a 27 item scale (SD3; Jones & Paulhus, forthcoming).

Edited January 2, 2014 by Dorian Black

[Captain Mar-Vell]

...

Darn it.

 

Ha ha ha!

 

You shouldn't have mentioned Loki just after I posted Deep Purple's "Hell to Pay!"

 

No way man!

 

I'll be gettin meself in trouble...

Poem No:66 Hell to Pay.

...

Edited January 2, 2014 by Captain Mar-Vell

[Sloppy Zhang]

My bane post was actually satirical, however it's pretty funny watching it be dissected haha.

 

Let's keep going!

 

For clarification though, bane wasn't technically a henchman, he did what he wanted when he wanted. In fact when talia wanted him not to kill the batman he was gonna anyway.

 

He was gonna... but he didn't.

 

Talia pulled the strings the whole time. Do you really think he would have done anything without checking in with Talia first?

 

Reworded, do you think there was anything he did Talia didn't know about?

 

Also I highly doubt their relationship was remotely sexual, as he was in his late twenties when talia was 8.

 

So when she was 18 he was in his late 30's.

 

So he wasn't really lovesick, this is a misconception.

 

How do you think he felt when she was stroking his face during her ending monologue?

 

"Oh my god finally she touched me tenderly." Is something how I think might have gone through that character's mind...

 

Also batman did get laid in his low test period, however she got with him in order to weaken him and get him attached to her.

 

Is THAT what she told Bane?

 

Adding to this batman did lose Rachel to Harvey dent in the dark knight. Of course he was also shagging European models. All this to say I also disagree with Dorian about bane being beautiful. Many a girl has confessed they'd jump bane, mask and all. All this to say we can make generalizations, but shit is random.

 

Which girls? Characters in the fictional batman universe?

 

Or girls in the meta universe (our universe) who know that Bane is actually a good looking and famous, charismatic actor?

 

An actor who is able to play emotionally afflicted characters but still relate on a human level (a human actor with other performances to be viewed) therefore actually fulfilling Dorian's criteria??

[i am]

Well I've found there's a place between "douche" and "predictable boring dork submissive male".

 

This would include someone who is smart, willing to take chances, won't tolerate shit from other men or women, is extremely confident WITHOUT the ego, and will not lie to you, cheat on you, belittle others or you...basically a man, confident in himself but not "into" himself, secure in who he is, who doesn't need to play games or mess with other people.

 

And the kind of women who are into men like that and see through the bullshit of the others are quality women.

 

But we're talking about different things. Getting laid and finding a quality women are not necessarily in the same universe, though they can and do mix.

 

Being a douche in order to pick up women is a game (unless you just really are a douche), and though most people do it to some extent, it's acting out a lie in order to get laid.

 

When being a content person is more important than scoring, you'll see the difference. It's a completely different lens you view the world through when you're just out to be a good person and enjoy life, rather than trying to be a certain way to attract women.

 

But we've had this conversation before. Some want to be the dominant male, gain power and ass and play some version of a man they see in the movies, since they've spent more time in fantasy than real life (but they're in good company, these days...so many people acting out a version of reality supplied by Hollywood and thinking its genuine). Or they just are that way.

 

Some believe women to be power and energy hungry greedy moochers and avoid them.

 

Others are happy to stay out of all the silly games and just live life, connect with people, and hopefully evolve a bit.

 

I know a couple guys who are great people, strong, confident, secure, and the greatest guys you'll meet. They had their time out at the bars bringing girls home. But never did they deceive, lie, or play games. They were themselves. They didn't put other guys down to make them look better. And before they went past a certain point, they made sure the woman knew what they were after in the night (not a relationship). And they did WELL.

 

So...am I looking for the average, "I like douchebags" women? No. So I don't really much care about the statistics.

 

Being nice, genuine and secure is not necessarily being submissive and boring. When you get past the games of dominance and become a man who could be dominant but chooses not to be, then you're an enviable, attractive man. It's been touched on here already. If you ARE dominant, there's no need to make a show of it. Other dominant men give you a nod and respect. Less dominant people naturally give you space and often help. And cool women, when they see you are dominant AND nice, with nothing to prove, come out of the woodwork.

 

But yeah...most drunk teen and 20-something women don't have the appreciation for maturity yet. They're still playing the game.

Edited January 2, 2014 by i am

[Aetherous]

Men: a few books on what women possibly like and why that might possibly be, some with a more positive tone which is always nice...

One

Two

Three

[Sloppy Zhang]

 

Well I've found there's a place between "douche" and "predictable boring dork submissive male".

 

This would include someone who is smart, willing to take chances, won't tolerate shit from other men or women, is extremely confident WITHOUT the ego, and will not lie to you, cheat on you, belittle others or you...basically a man, confident in himself but not "into" himself, secure in who he is, who doesn't need to play games or mess with other people.

 

...

 

Being nice, genuine and secure is not necessarily being submissive and boring. When you get past the games of dominance and become a man who could be dominant but chooses not to be, then you're an enviable, attractive man. It's been touched on here already. If you ARE dominant, there's no need to make a show of it. Other dominant men give you a nod and respect. Less dominant people naturally give you space and often help. And cool women, when they see you are dominant AND nice, with nothing to prove, come out of the woodwork.

 

If nice guys and douche's are both getting laid by (hot?) chicks at bars and clubs, then "being nice" or "being a douche" is not the determining factor in getting laid.

 

Or having fulfilling (sexual) relationships with women.

 

But yeah...most drunk teen and 20-something women don't have the appreciation for maturity yet. They're still playing the game.

 

 

So what are teen and 20 something men to do?

Edited January 2, 2014 by Sloppy Zhang

[silent thunder]

I find the title change very appropriate.

lol BKA

[Trunk]

I'm more and more appreciating the traditional arts (music, painting, cooking) for all purposes...

- soothing the loneliness of the solitary mystic, when I'm on my own... also as a way to psychologically process the changes brought on by practice of the internal arts, and a way to communicate with 'regular people' (especially since I've gone way past odd, a long long time ago, relating to folks has its challenging aspects)

- bringing joy and harmony to the house-hold, with those that I live with

- as traditional courtship arts, something to share with would-be sweety

 

 

[Aetherous]

I find the title change very appropriate.

lol BKA

 

Guys, please don't insult people here.

[Sloppy Zhang]

So my advice to guys who are after gals, men who are after women, dufi* who are after chicks, etc., would be this:

 

try to become aware of what the girl, woman, chick might want. Flex the muscles of your awareness. Try to approximate as closely as you can what would make her happy right now, this very moment. And then give it to her before asking for anything in return. This behavior is absolutely irresistible.

 

*dufi: the plural of dufus

 

Not sure that "dufus is to guy as chick is to girl" necessarily holds...

 

If a girl calls a guy a "dufus" that is not the equivalent to when a guy calls a girl a "chick."

 

 

[edit]

 

Let's talk about how "men" and "women" are opposite on the spectrum, but it's "guys and girls" instead of "boys and girls". We can use words like "infantilization." We may even go so far as pedophilia in the mainstream.

Edited January 2, 2014 by Sloppy Zhang

[Sloppy Zhang]

Nice explanation. What about those that learn their behavior from their peers and don't know any differently ?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

That's a form of parental neglect, which is a form of abuse of power. Healthy parenting safeguards against learning from peers anything counterproductive. Peers as a stand-off for parents and teachers are not equipped, they assume the role only in circumstances where there's no satisfactory parenting and teaching by parents and teachers taking place. This can do harm, no doubt, but this is the secondary source of harm, the primary source is the absence of true power-installing, power-infusing parenting and teaching. If parents failed to make a child powerful inside, the child will seek artificial circumstances to fake having this power. Peers can help fake it. Not their fault, theirs is exactly the same predicament.

 

And parents, in their turn, are not equipped to give their children true inner power because they don't have it themselves. All they know is how to either be weak or make someone else weak, i.e. appear strong at the expense of taking power away from someone else.

 

And this, in its turn, is a larger social set-up resonating into every family...

 

And what happens when a person with a good parental background a good sense of internal direction finds themselves lonely amongst a peer group of "drunk teens and 20-somethings" who don't appreciate this internal direction?

 

What happens when this person observes (through direct interaction) that those who are forming human relationships are the douchebags? The girls who put out for the douchebags?

 

What is a person to do?

[silent thunder]

And what happens when a person with a good parental background a good sense of internal direction finds themselves lonely amongst a peer group of "drunk teens and 20-somethings" who don't appreciate this internal direction?

 

What happens when this person observes (through direct interaction) that those who are forming human relationships are the douchebags? The girls who put out for the douchebags?

 

What is a person to do?

I find they are drawn to older partners...

[BaguaKicksAss]

Guys, please don't insult people here.

 

My thread title change was an insult to the methods recommended, not people in this thread. Well OK and perhaps your stereotypical douche that one sees at the bar , but more about the methods recommended. The thread pretty much downgraded for a bit there into how to treat people like crap to get laid/find a partner.

 

___________________________________________________________________________________________

 

Only doing one post here, can only practice so much Bagua in one day .

 

*This* is one of the actors considered most attractive by many women I have talked to (and I do mean his role in this movie in particular).

 

 

 

[silent thunder]

My thread title change was an insult to the methods recommended, not people in this thread. Well OK and perhaps your stereotypical douche that one sees at the bar , but more about the methods recommended. The thread pretty much downgraded for a bit there into how to treat people like crap to get laid/find a partner.

 

___________________________________________________________________________________________

 

Only doing one post here, can only practice so much Bagua in one day .

 

*This* is one of the actors considered most attractive by many women I have talked to (and I do mean his role in this movie in particular).

 

 

 

Tim Curry rocks!

Although my wife is into bald white guys....

Which just happens to be awesome in my case as I shave my head

[Sloppy Zhang]

I find they are drawn to older partners...

 

And should their sexual attraction be more towards the teen and twenty something crowd?

[bax44]

 

Let's keep going!

 

 

He was gonna... but he didn't.

 

Talia pulled the strings the whole time. Do you really think he would have done anything without checking in with Talia first?

 

Reworded, do you think there was anything he did Talia didn't know about?

I think they were working sort of like a duel pronged attack on Gotham.. Actually if you watch the documentary in the darkknight trilogy box set christopher nolan actually states this. That Talia was attacking Bruce emotionally/ and wayne enterprises, while Bane was corrupting the city/ attacking batman physically. they were working in tandem, together on their own plans. I can see how its confusing, but I think banes his own man.

 

So when she was 18 he was in his late 30's.

 

 

 

How do you think he felt when she was stroking his face during her ending monologue?

 

"Oh my god finally she touched me tenderly." Is something how I think might have gone through that character's mind...

I highly doubt how thats it was supposed to come across. In fact I find it laughable anyone could think he was moved because Talia "finally touched him".. I think the writers in the trilogy proved to be a bit more nuanced than that. Bane was emotional over her re-telling of him saving her from death in the pit..Of him being cast aside by the league of shadows..of his lost innocence.

 

Is THAT what she told Bane?

No idea. Doubt bane cared much either way

 

Which girls? Characters in the fictional batman universe?

In real life. Yes, its been said.

 

Let's keep going!

It is fun i agree haha..

Edited January 2, 2014 by bax44

[Wells]

*This* is one of the actors considered most attractive by many women I have talked to (and I do mean his role in this movie in particular).

 

 

 

 

 

Did the character demonstrate psychopathic, narcissistic & machiavellian behavior in the movie...?

 

[silent thunder]

And should their sexual attraction be more towards the teen and twenty something crowd?

No should.

Attraction happens very naturally.

Odd concept to me.

[Sloppy Zhang]

I think they were working sort of like a duel pronged attack on Gotham.. Actually if you watch the documentary in the darkknight trilogy box set christopher nolan actually states this. That Talia was attacking Bruce emotionally/ and wayne enterprises, while Bane was corrupting the city/ attacking batman physically. they were working in tandem, together on their own plans. I can see how its confusing, but I think banes his own man.

 

It's not confusing. I just don't think Bane was his own man. He always had a thing for Talia.

 

I highly doubt how thats it was supposed to come across. In fact I find it laughable anyone could think he was moved because Talia "finally touched him".. I think the writers in the trilogy proved to be a bit more nuanced than that. Bane was emotional over her re-telling of him saving her from death in the pit..Of him being cast aside by the league of shadows..of his lost innocence.

 

Bane was never the innocent one. It's Talia's innocence he was protecting in the prison.

 

No idea. Doubt bane cared much either way

 

I disagree. He cared for her since day one.

 

How do you feel when a girl you've raised since 8 years old (if we go for the theory that he didn't have a thing for her, which I still think he did) hooks up with the dude who killed her father...

 

In real life. Yes, its been said.

 

Then that proves Dorian's point

 

We need to draw a distinction between analyzing women's sexual attraction to Bane the character (women who live in the Batman universe, which is roughly analogous to our society), compared to women's sexual attraction to Bane the actor.... more correctly, Tom Hardy playing Bane.

 

When I analyzed your first post about Bane, I was analyzing him from the point of view of women inside the Batman universe. I compared that to Loki, and whether women inside of the Marvel universe would find Loki attractive.

 

That's DIFFERENT than if we look at whether women would be sexually attracted Tom Hardy dressed as Bane. They know he can act the part of Bane, but is NOT actually Bane (he's a human being). Same thing with whether women are attracted to Tom Hiddleston acting as Loki.

 

It is fun i agree haha.

 

Glad to hear!

[Sloppy Zhang]

No should.

Attraction happens very naturally.

Odd concept to me.

 

The question I was asking:

 

"What happens if they are sexually attracted to younger women despite getting along better with older women."

[bax44]

 

It's not confusing. I just don't think Bane was his own man. He always had a thing for Talia.

 

 

Bane was never the innocent one. It's Talia's innocence he was protecting in the prison.

Lol well you disagree with the director and writers of the movie, because they say quite clearly that bane was in fact working on his own plan in tandem with talias plan, which were actually two seperate things which converged at the end.

 

I disagree. He cared for her since day one.

Of course he did. But caring for her and wanting to have sexual relations with her are two different things. THeir relationship struck me more as a big brother/little sister thing. He was her "protector".. and she funded his operation. Hardly would say he was under her in any way.

 

How do you feel when a girl you've raised since 8 years old (if we go for the theory that he didn't have a thing for her, which I still think he did) hooks up with the dude who killed her father...

You were arguing he had a romantic thing for her, and were claiming he was somehow talias puppy dog. If he had no romantic interest in her, I doubt he really cares who she hooks up with, especially if its to further the cause of humiliating and destroying the person responsible for killing her father.( which in the end is really the only reason Talia sleeps with bruce, to get him attached and weaken him)

 

Then that proves Dorian's point

 

We need to draw a distinction between analyzing women's sexual attraction to Bane the character (women who live in the Batman universe, which is roughly analogous to our society), compared to women's sexual attraction to Bane the actor.... more correctly, Tom Hardy playing Bane.

 

When I analyzed your first post about Bane, I was analyzing him from the point of view of women inside the Batman universe. I compared that to Loki, and whether women inside of the Marvel universe would find Loki attractive.

 

Ok.. Not sure why women in a superhero movie would be analgous to women in our society necessarily, but fair enough I suppose I minsinterpreted something there lol.

 

That's DIFFERENT than if we look at whether women would be sexually attracted Tom Hardy dressed as Bane. They know he can act the part of Bane, but is NOT actually Bane (he's a human being). Same thing with whether women are attracted to Tom Hiddleston acting as Loki.

No, I was saying that women in real life have said they would sex up Bane..not Tom hardy lol. Obviously Tom Hardy is attractive to ordinary women, although his jawline isnt quite as chiseled as dorian would probably like. My whole point was he demonstrates the alpha male characteristics regardless of what you think of his relationship with Talia was.. Forgetting you cant see his jawbone because of the mask, which is a real handicap. My original satirical argument was bane was just as much an alpha male as Loki was. The same Loki who showed some giant weaknesses towards the end of the avengers. Lol I was just kind of making a little bit of fun out of the Loki being a Pimp argument. None of this is really serious although it is funny how people can view characters so differently in the case of bane/ Talia.

 

Glad to hear!

Edited January 2, 2014 by bax44

[Sloppy Zhang]

Lol well you disagree with the director and writers of the movie, because they say quite clearly that bane was in fact working on his own plan in tandem with talias plan, which were actually two seperate things which converged at the end.

 

Can we clarify what you mean by "in tandem"?

 

If Bane and Talia were working "in tandem" that means they were working together...

 

If you mean that their plans, say, dovetailed nicely together, then they may have been separate and things just worked out in the end.

 

Of course he did. But caring for her and wanting to have sexual relations with her are two different things. THeir relationship struck me more as a big brother/little sister thing. He was her "protector".. and she funded his operation. Hardly would say he was under her in any way.

You were arguing he had a romantic thing for her, and were claiming he was somehow talias puppy dog. If he had no romantic interest in her, I doubt he really cares who she hooks up with, especially if its to further the cause of humiliating and destroying the person responsible for killing her father.( which in the end is really the only reason Talia sleeps with bruce, to get him attached and weaken him)

 

I think he DOES have a romantic interest in her, and yeah, it does bother him that he banged his girl. At the very least there is sexual tension, even if they do have a brother/sister relationship.

 

You can argue Talia slept with Batman for whatever reason you want. The fact is:

 

-Bruce kills Talia's father

-Talia sleeps with Bruce

-Bane takes care of her since she was 8 years old

-Talia does not sleep with Bane

 

Ok.. Not sure why women in a superhero movie would be analgous to women in our society necessarily, but fair enough I suppose I minsinterpreted something there lol.

 

Because they are humans living in a modern(ish) earth. America. New York (or New York analog). It's fair to assume their values are fairy analogous, as is who they would find sexually attractive.

 

No, I was saying that women in real life have said they would sex up Bane..not Tom hardy lol.

 

Bane doesn't exist in real life

 

Real life women who say they would have sex with Bane are not wanting to have sex with Bane. They are wanting to have sex with Tom Hardy as Bane.

 

Talia, though, is a fictional character who had fictional sex with a fictional Bruce Wayne.

 

Now if Catwoman said she wanted to have sex with Bane, you'd have an argument to say "women said they wanted to have sex with Bane." Alternatively, if you found a screen capture of the Batman film that showed a character who wanted to have sex with Bane, then you could safely say "women want to have sex with Bane."

 

But if you cite a woman from "our world" (the real one) who said she wants Bane... she really means Tom Hardy acting as Bane.

 

Obviously Tom Hardy is attractive to ordinary women, although his jawline isnt quite as chiseled as dorian would probably like. My whole point was he demonstrates the alpha male characteristics regardless of what you think of his relationship with Talia was.. Forgetting you cant see his jawbone because of the mask, which is a real handicap. My original satirical argument was bane was just as much an alpha male as Loki was. The same Loki who showed some giant weaknesses towards the end of the avengers. Lol I was just kind of making a little bit of fun out of the Loki being a Pimp argument. None of this is really serious although it is funny how people can view characters so differently in the case of bane/ Talia.

 

Well now you are getting into the "different types of alpha" argument

 

Bane is an alpha in the sense that he's a badass leader of a rebel army that can overthrow a large city and paralyze the government of the United States.

 

He's still not getting laid.

 

Loki is more of a sleight of build sarcastic mischievous fuck.

 

He's probably getting laid a lot more than Bane.

 

We can infer this because the women in these fictional universes more than likely behave similarly to the way they behave in the real world (since those fictional universes contain more similarities to ours than not) and, as we all know from copious amounts of experience and touches of scientific evidence....

 

Players get laid my multiple sexually attractive women and girls.

[silent thunder]

The question I was asking:

 

"What happens if they are sexually attracted to younger women despite getting along better with older women."

Oh! Missed that point entirely In that case, what a bugger... I guess there's the route of 'grin and bear it' until the right fit comes along.

 

Most of these situations being discussed recently in the thread are pretty situation specific and represent a small percentage of actual people and relationships in my experience.

I acknowledge to have been surrounded by spiritually elevated, intelligent, aware women most of my adult life.

I have hung out mainly with artists this time around. Perhaps that has something to do with it...