Death for Dummies

[Yoda]

I just searched for "Death for Dummies" on amazon and up came "Single Parenting for Dummies".

 

 

I'm wondering if anyone has any cool exit strategy tips that can help me maximize the pleasure of dying.

 

 

I'm thinking that the primary practice is fasting... it generates endorphins, and even heroin-like releases in the brain, and enhances an otherworldly focus that will already be well underway during the aging process.

 

Then comes sungazing assuming circumstances permit.

 

I bet amaroli will be another one to include, but I'll have to experiment further on that one.

 

If sungazing is out of the question, then music will be the next item on the list. I'd imagine I'd be in the mood for Rachmaninov or that tune from Brideshead Revisted... a romantic vibe.

 

I'll be very curious to find out what religion I actually am!!! That'll be fun. Vivekananda did not discover his true identity until immediately before he died and I think that is probably more the rule than the exception.

 

Yoda

[Trunk]

I'm wondering if anyone has any cool exit strategy tips..

Choose your loka way ahead of time, and practice hanging out with the beings there. Per everyone, big opportunities right around/after death, but the storm of confusion is intense. If you're already practiced at aligning with a celestial lineage, then you can benefit from their skilled support at that time. MG once said that that's when the lineage really "earns their $10 per hour".

[Taomeow]

In Dzogchen, there's a part that trains you to sleep a certain way, a sleep yoga practice that takes years or even decades to master. They assert that training to sleep consciously is the necessary step for retaining consciousness and control during and after death. As much control as you have over your sleep process you are expected to have over your death and afterlife. Unconscious sleep with no voluntary control is a harbinger of being lost and confused in bardo. A master of sleep, on the other hand, is expected to be able to choose where to go once she's dead, and in what capacity.

 

Then there's assorted taoist views. Complete Reality and Celestial Teachers folks believe you become a gui, "hungry ghost," if you die unfulfilled, or if you don't practice, or if you screw up your practice, e.g. by sitting in stillness meditations too much and accumulating too much yin or by "practicing tao without understanding it." Zhuangzi is far more optimistic -- you are just going to be incarnated as "a rat's liver," for instance, "where can tao take me that isn't good?" Then there was a realized master, forget his name, who was asked by a student what happens after death and replied, I've no idea. "But you're a great and accomplished realized master," the student protested. "Yes, that I am, but not a dead one!" snapped the teacher.

 

Then there's old shamanic beliefs, more or less universal worldwide. Some African tribes believe that if you had a normal, successful family life, then after death you turn into mboga. Mboga is the kind of ancestor who retains interest in the affairs of the living and makes himself or herself available for wise and kindly advice provided the living remember and respect their mboga, or becomes vengeful and hindering if they don't. This places the affairs of the dead and the living in a feedback loop that is also taken into account by the oldest part of classical feng shui, yin feng shui, the art of making the dead comfortable.

 

I think Zhuangzi appeals to Westerners more than many other Chinese philosophers because he basically advocates doing nothing special towards any special goal whatsoever. That's unusual and eccentric in the overall scheme of things, most would require certain preparations and imply different options and choices after death, on the assumption that to the same extent that life can (and often does) go haywire, so can death, and it might be a good idea to take some care to disentangle and straighten out both.

[Ian]

I'm wondering if anyone has any cool exit strategy tips that can help me maximize the pleasure of dying.

 

I'd suggest: practice enjoying no stimulus whatsoever. Get intimate with the space between the sensation inside the body. Loosen up on the idea that it will be enjoyable in any way you're familiar with.

 

None of the above based on experience, inevitably.

[Yoda]

Awesome thoughts Trunk, TM, Ian... my next incarnation will surely be appreciative!!

 

Choose your loka way ahead of time, and practice hanging out with the beings there. Per everyone, big opportunities right around/after death, but the storm of confusion is intense. If you're already practiced at aligning with a celestial lineage, then you can benefit from their skilled support at that time. MG once said that that's when the lineage really "earns their $10 per hour".

 

LOL!!

 

"Loka yoga" automatically spills into sleeping yoga so maybe both strategies can be put into play. For me, everything has to be 'just so' for me to get anywhere with sleeping yoga right now. Hopefully that'll change. If not, loka yoga is one of the easiest practices out there to do under any set of conditions.

 

Yoda

[mYTHmAKER]

I'm wondering if anyone has any cool exit strategy tips that can help me maximize the pleasure of dying.

Yoda

 

Definately die slowly.

[Neijia]

I think when it comes to thetaobums, Taomeow is my personal hero.

[Pero]

 

If not, loka yoga is one of the easiest practices out there to do under under any set of conditions.

What makes you think that?

 

Anyway, I guess you could always OD if you want a pleasurable death.

[Taomeow]

Neijia, whatcha doing to my hard-earned humility!

 

Bow ...

[Yoda]

Pero,

 

Actually, I just made the phrase 'loka yoga' up on the fly but what I meant by that is the practice of focusing on a particular enlightened soul, either their image, a memory of them, a mantra associated with them. By loka, I'm assuming Trunk meant was that if you focus on Jesus, Tara, Odin, etc you go to their particular beer hall when you croak.

 

There's a story of Avalokiteshvara (sp?) who taught his student to ring a bell and say his mantra on a regular basis. When she died she started heading towards and iron pot full of molten magma or something but one of the devils foolishly banged his stirring spoon against the side of the pot which made a ringing sound and reminded her to say the mantra and she was wisked off to eat grapes and practice the dharma in a pure land setting instead.

 

The story is pretty ghastly in how it tries to inspire fear. If I remember correctly, that was Avalokiteshvara's own mother too. Yucky stuff, but at least it is instructive how the whole loka business goes.

 

I think it is considered easier to think of a divine soul at the moment of death rather than try to pull off a complicated practice as there may be a lot of confusion or bewilderment at the exposure of such new stimulation.

 

I had recently capsized my canoe in some very cold rapids and it seemed like it took me awhile to get my thoughts together to even begin to attempt the basic how-tos of the situation. And even that was hard. Assuming that analogy has anything going for it, you gotta keep the solution as simple as possible.

[rex]

Lokas are one of six destinations for transmigrating beings - admission by negative emotion. According to the Bon tradition unpurified mind streams with particular dominant qualities may have the following karmic vision:

 

Hell Realm: Anger

Hungry Ghost Realm: Greed

Animal Realm: Ignorance

Human Realm: Jealousy

Demi-God Realm: Pride

God Realm: All negative emotions combined

 

Slightly different to the Buddhist view but the gist is the same.

 

Focusing on divine beings etc. may result in rebirth in a pure realm beyond the lokas.

[Pero]

Yes Yoda, but even in that story it's not as simple as it looks IMO. I don't doubt that she practiced that for quite a while before she died. Getting ready to die can be a lifetime thing. If you don't train it's not very likely you'll ssucceed (sp?). And having Avalokiteshvara as your teacher is no small thing either. May the rays of his compassion reach all sentient beings.

 

I would just like to add something to what Rex posted. The divinities meant are the ones that are enlightened, not just some great gods. Something like Tara, Avalokiteshvara, various Buddhas and so on. Odin, Brahma, Allah and so on don't coun't. Gods or not, they are still in samsara.

[Yoda]

A favorite visualization of my death is that of riding at the helm of a viking ship through an ocean of blood with the immigrant song blasting away as my predeceased brethren are busy rolling a massive barrel of beer into the hall. My kind of loka!! But don't worry... we've thought it through and invited a live band with Jesus (guitar), Krishna (vocals), Buddha (bass), Kwanyin (drums) so we won't find ourselves in a sucky loka at the end of the bash.

[beancurdturtle]

I have a sneaking suspicion that practicing for death is as effective as practicing to be a parent.

 

You have no freakin idea what it's really going to be until you actually get there.

 

Any parent will vouch for me on this.

[Taomeow]

I have a sneaking suspicion that practicing for death is as effective as practicing to be a parent.

 

You have no freakin idea what it's really going to be until you actually get there.

 

Any parent will vouch for me on this.

 

Actually, it helps to have practiced taking care of a house plant, at the very least. If a cactus has never thrived under one's care, chances are his or her children are gonna be so screwed...

 

Or take a cat, a dog, a fish tank -- and practice. If everything alive withers from one's touch, his or her future kids are screwed, guaranteed.

 

Another way to practice parenting: do whatever it takes to come to an emotional place where you feel fine in your own company, under any circumstances, with no help from anybody or anything else. If you're cool being with yourself, chances are your kids will be too. If you don't need props, distractions, things to do that are all aimed at helping you avoid any prolonged one-on-one contact with yourself -- chances are your kids will not be used by you as props, distractions, things to do so as not to have to deal with yourself directly. And they are going to be far better off in this situation than the children of the opposite deal.

 

As for death preparedness... as a protagonist of my all-time favorite novel (translated into English four times but, unfortunately, with none of the translations even remotely touching the real thing) said to another protagonist of same,

"That man is mortal is not the real problem. The real problem is that man is sometimes suddenly mortal." And proceeded to predict to another protagonist that he would die via having his head chopped off by a woman. The forewarned party didn't believe it, but that's exactly what happened five minutes later... and having been totally, utterly unprepared for it caused a helluva lot of trouble for him in the next world.

[eatyourgreens]

I think when it comes to thetaobums, Taomeow is my personal hero.

 

 

i second that with deep respect!

Edited August 10, 2007 by eatyourgreens

[Pero]

I have a sneaking suspicion that practicing for death is as effective as practicing to be a parent.

 

You have no freakin idea what it's really going to be until you actually get there.

 

Not quite. You were a kid once and you learned from your parents. So you do have some idea. But you're right it's not easy.

 

 

That man is mortal is not the problem. The real problem is that man is sometimes suddenly mortal.

Indeed. I really like this, might use in my sig sometime. Where is it from?

[beancurdturtle]

Houseplants die under my care - but my son is one of the most wonderful, respectful, and caring people I know. That however does not negate your point.

 

My point is; you can practice all you want, but there is no way to fully know what death really is until you step off that precipice. It's like practicing to pull a Radio Flyer Red Wagon so you can pilot a Space Shuttle.

 

I would also say that where we are after death is largely irrelevant to the space we inhabit now. So preparation for it is a moot point. But I understand my concept of the afterlife being a moot point confounds the mind and raises fear for many people.

 

It's better to accept that we are here now, and we will be dead sometime - the time and occasion of death is only a detail. It's much more important to do here and now appropriately then to practice for whatever and wherever we might be after we are dead.

 

Fear, anticipation, beliefs about what or where will be or go after death are all grounded in expectations. I go for acceptance - after I die, there I will be.

 

Until then I'll try to get it right here and now.

[Taomeow]

QUOTE(Taomeow @ Aug 10 2007, 08:10 AM) *

That man is mortal is not the problem. The real problem is that man is sometimes suddenly mortal.

 

Indeed. I really like this, might use in my sig sometime. Where is it from?

 

"The Master And Margarita," by Mikhail Bulgakov. Spoken by the devil in the course of a theological discussion he's having with two hardened atheists. This novel inspired Mick Jagger's "Sympathy For The Devil," by the way.

Edited August 10, 2007 by Taomeow

[Pero]

Houseplants die under my care - but my son is one of the most wonderful, respectful, and caring people I know. That however does not negate your point.

 

My point is; you can practice all you want, but there is no way to fully know what death really is until you step off that precipice. It's like practicing to pull a Radio Flyer Red Wagon so you can pilot a Space Shuttle.

 

I would also say that where we are after death is largely irrelevant to the space we inhabit now. So preparation for it is a moot point. But I understand my concept of the afterlife being a moot point confounds the mind and raises fear for many people.

 

It's better to accept that we are here now, and we will be dead sometime - the time and occasion of death is only a detail. It's much more important to do here and now appropriately then to practice for whatever and wherever we might be after we are dead.

 

Fear, anticipation, beliefs about what or where will be or go after death are all grounded in expectations. I go for acceptance - after I die, there I will be.

 

Until then I'll try to get it right here and now.

 

 

We should be mindful of our death, since it is coming. But it`s not like you think about it all the time, or that you worry what your "afterlife" will be or something. It`s just that, when it comes, will you be prepared to die and will you be without regrets? And what you do "here and now" as you say, is related to what you`ll do then. A practitioner must know how to die and not ask himself at the time of death, what is he to do now.

 

You can`t know what death really is like, but you can get an idea. Falling asleep is similar. So as Taomeow (I think) mentioned, if you have no awareness during sleep, then you will have none when dead. So in this regard, it would kind of suck if I die tomorrow or something.

 

"The Master And Margarita," by Mikhail Bulgakov. Spoken by the devil in the course of a theological discussion he's having with two hardened atheists. This novel inspired Mick Jagger's "Sympathy For The Devil," by the way.

 

So it`s:

 

"That man is mortal is not the problem. The real problem is that man is sometimes suddenly mortal." - The Devil

 

[beancurdturtle]

It`s just that, when it comes, will you be prepared to die and will you be without regrets?

Do you think that, in the afterlife, your regrets will have relevence to your beforelife?

 

And what you do "here and now" as you say, is related to what you`ll do then.

And what regrets do you think you will have then, if you get the here and now mostly right? None at all I would say.

 

You can`t know what death really is like, but you can get an idea. Falling asleep is similar. So as Taomeow (I think) mentioned, if you have no awareness during sleep, then you will have none when dead.

How can you be certain, now that you are awake, that you had no awareness when you were asleep? Perhaps sleeping awareness is something so different from waking awareness that it's not possible to reconcile and understand it while awake.

 

You assume that you know what awareness you had while asleep by conjecturing about it while awake. Then you conjecture that death is akin to falling asleep. Seems a far stretch to me.

[Pero]

Do you think that, in the afterlife, your regrets will have relevence to your beforelife?

 

What?

 

Anyway, regrets are irrelevant, but what you did is not.

 

And what regrets do you think you will have then, if you get the here and now mostly right? None at all I would say.

 

Yes.

 

How can you be certain, now that you are awake, that you had no awareness when you were asleep? Perhaps sleeping awareness is something so different from waking awareness that it's not possible to reconcile and understand it while awake.

 

You assume that you know what awareness you had while asleep by conjecturing about it while awake. Then you conjecture that death is akin to falling asleep. Seems a far stretch to me.

 

I know from experience.

Death is similar to falling asleep, since in both cases the senses dissolve. But when you go to sleep they dissolve inside you, when you die they dissolve back into the elements. Or something like that, don`t remember exact explanation, but that`s the idea more or less.

[Lozen]

I think when it comes to thetaobums, Taomeow is my personal hero.

 

Mine too!

[Taomeow]

Mine too!

Thank you, wonderful people. Whatever have I done to deserve this? ( It's a rhethorical question, please don't subject my hard-earned humility to more tests! )

[beancurdturtle]

Mine too!

Geeze!

 

I must be so under-cultivated - 'cause I'm just hot for her.