regrets

[3bob]

Sometimes we hear a line like, "I have no regrets". Well imo that is an impossible condition for a fairly "normal" and honest human being to really be in while more or less also being in a dualistic state. (although not for a fully enlightened being who has resolved all karmas)

 

Anyway, I have various regrets but I don't overly regret having regrets since one must learn and then move on...

[BaguaKicksAss]

But if you look at every single regret, if we had done things differently we would have been stuck in a situation which was not ideal for us. Also our lives would have taken a very very different path.

[Chang]

I certainly have regrets and the thought has oft times occured to me that were I to live my life again I would do things differently.

 

The fact is however that we cannot change what we have done and the really important thing is to do our best not to repeat the mistakes of the past. Unfortunately most of us make the same mistake over and over and never seem to learn.

[thelerner]

Ah, Regret and its sister Guilt. Not the most pleasant relatives, but they help keep one on the right path. We may not want to live with them, but imo its good to take there phone calls.

[3bob]

BKA,

And if we had done things differently we might have also not been stuck along with being in a more ideal situation.

[Anoesjka]

How can we learn, if not through regret?

Edited July 5, 2014 by Anoesjka

[Marblehead]

Yeah, but we shouldn't linger on those regrets too long or too often because they can actually hold us back. Sure, learn the lesson that caused the regrets. Don't do that mistake over again. Try something else. Another mistake? We will do that too.

[GrandmasterP]

There's a theme-song for this thread.....

 

[Marblehead]

I haven't heard her name is so, so many years.

[3bob]

Yeah, but we shouldn't linger on those regrets too long or too often because they can actually hold us back. Sure, learn the lesson that caused the regrets. Don't do that mistake over again. Try something else. Another mistake? We will do that too.

 

right, and at least make a variation of the original mistake if doing so

[manitou]

Sometimes we hear a line like, "I have no regrets". Well imo that is an impossible condition for a fairly "normal" and honest human being to really be in while more or less also being in a dualistic state. (although not for a fully enlightened being who has resolved all karmas)

 

Anyway, I have various regrets but I don't overly regret having regrets since one must learn and then move on...

 

 

I imagine only a really narcissistic person would really believe that 'they have no regrets'. Like, they've never hurt another? Intentionally or unintentionally?

 

But the sting is taken out of regret when we realize that everything is happening on schedule. I regret having an abortion at a young age - but on the other hand, if I had had a child and spent my life raising the child, I would not have had the time to devote years to metaphysical study.

 

Forgiving ourselves is a big part of the equation too.

[Marblehead]

Forgiving ourselves is a big part of the equation too.

A VERY BIG part indeed!

[3bob]

I imagine only a really narcissistic person would really believe that 'they have no regrets'. Like, they've never hurt another? Intentionally or unintentionally?

 

But the sting is taken out of regret when we realize that everything is happening on schedule. I regret having an abortion at a young age - but on the other hand, if I had had a child and spent my life raising the child, I would not have had the time to devote years to metaphysical study.

 

Forgiving ourselves is a big part of the equation too.

 

I know a couple of things about metaphysical study, while my wife, kids, dog, cat and being a householder taught me a lot more about getting down to the brass tacks.

[Bearded Dragon]

You were never going to do anything differently. You always act based on conditions and who you think you are at that moment in time. Therefore you should have no regrets. You accept that you acted accordingly to how you were at the time and that you would do things differently now only because conditions are different and/or your perceived self is different.

 

It's not even about forgiving yourself because even if you forgive your perceived self it's not who you are now.

 

It sounds like a license to do whatever you want guilt free. It is not.

[Chang]

[3bob]

You were never going to do anything differently. You always act based on conditions and who you think you are at that moment in time. Therefore you should have no regrets. You accept that you acted accordingly to how you were at the time and that you would do things differently now only because conditions are different and/or your perceived self is different.

 

It's not even about forgiving yourself because even if you forgive your perceived self it's not who you are now.

 

It sounds like a license to do whatever you want guilt free. It is not.

 

please don't give that out to our politicians, they are dangerous enough already.

[manitou]

I know a couple of things about metaphysical study, while my wife, kids, dog, cat and being a householder taught me a lot more about getting down to the brass tacks.

 

 

Agreed - any circumstance will promote the understanding of metaphysics if this is where our interest lies. At my child-bearing years, though, I would have been a horrible parent and raised my child just as I'd been raised - didn't know any different! I am actually thankful that I didn't have a child at that time - but if I had, I guarantee you I wouldn't have been involved in metaphysics. I would have been raising my child with a very heavy and controlling hand.

 

I'm guessing that That Which Lives Within Us is the very thing that attracts us to one life or the other. All it wants to do is express within the vehicles of our bodies, and it already knows the circumstances that formed the Acquired Personality, and the best way to break it down if needed.

[Stosh]

There's a theme-song for this thread.....

Thats a lovely song, thanks for posting it on, ( I like the french version ) Thought I recognized her voice from Saving Private Ryan, but its a different song.