Taoist Ethics for taoist PUA

[beancurdturtle]

I was joking.

 

It was actually a parody of an American point of view.

Whereas I did not sign a release form holding you harmless from the results of your parody the American point of view.

 

Resolved therefor that you are not sheltered from harm either direct or of proximate cause.

 

Therefore, as I am of the aforementioned nationalism, you shall soon receive a summons to answer to my lawsuit for having done me irreparable harm and caused me considerable pain and anguish.

[Pietro]

Whereas I did not sign a release form holding you harmless from the results of your parody the American point of view.

 

Resolved therefor that you are not sheltered from harm either direct or of proximate cause.

 

Therefore, as I am of the aforementioned nationalism, you shall soon receive a summons to answer to my lawsuit for having done me irreparable harm and caused me considerable pain and anguish.

Hmm, suing from one nation to the other...

lot's of luck

[三江源]

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Edited March 26, 2015 by 三江源

[VeeCee]

Not to bust in on your conversation, but I was wondering if the sheep in Pietro's picture has signed a release.

 

V.

[Pietro]

Not to bust in on your conversation, but I was wondering if the sheep in Pietro's picture has signed a release.

 

V.

She gave me oral permission.

When you truly love a mammalian you can pick up permission from subtle clues.

 

ooh. cocky funny! excellent.

so am I getting my drink or hot?

[Wayfarer64]

Pietro- Kudos on having the sheep while riding a bike ! We discussed just that situation on an earlier thread and I have been very happy to see this activity given the light of day.

 

If the gay rights agenda can usurp the freedoms of scientific research as has been noted around the web- than sheep lovers need to unite as well- if just to create another front for love and freedom...

 

I am in favor of humor taking precidence over political correctivity at every instance ! Laughter at the expence of others proclivities is a god-given right !

 

BUT... ethics in love and romance is a very important factor of our interactions! We need to show respect & nurturing for each other. If we can laugh at our foibles while doing so all the better...

[Pietro]

BUT... ethics in love and romance is a very important factor ...

 

I agree. that's why I started this whole thread. More specifically what kind of behaviour would you consider ethical for you, unethical for you, unethical for anybody.

 

And most importantly, why?

(remember no references to external authorities in the answer)

[beancurdturtle]

what do you think of PUA ethics, turtle of the america?

I always do my best to act with honesty and sincerity - and *gasp* even respect. That leaves little room for PUA games. Hence my long stretch of no babes.

 

Well, there's that - and the fact that nearly every woman in this "Christian Nation" I've dated recently runs screaming for the hills when she finds I have no faith. Weird freekin' society here in the US.

 

It's not "God Fearing" - it's "Godless Fearing."

[VeeCee]

Well, there's that - and the fact that nearly every woman in this "Christian Nation" I've dated recently runs screaming for the hills when she finds I have no faith.

 

BCT,

 

Have faith, you'll meet someone who has no faith.

 

V.

[Ian]

I agree. that's why I started this whole thread. More specifically what kind of behaviour would you consider ethical for you, unethical for you, unethical for anybody.

 

And most importantly, why?

(remember no references to external authorities in the answer)

 

Interesting. I used to be a typical AFC. Then I went through a brief period of just having other priorities than relationships, sex etc. And during this time I met someone. And with her I find myself able to be a lot more confident and less inclined to take any crap. By no means 100%, I'm still pretty soppy, but better than before.

 

And this has just arisen from the dynamic with her. I didn't have to pretend until I got the hang of it or anything.

 

My opinion is that pretense is unethical. Because the universe is one. Pretense creates extra secrets, extra difference, extra separation. So by all means make someone find you more attractive by being confident, cocky, funny, whatever, IF you've genuinely got to a point where that's how you are.

 

If you just pretend it, you may get verbally, posturally, even energetically convincing. But you're still riding for a fall, if you don't get spiritually confident first and let the rest flow outwards. Because only the reinforcing feedback will make you feel ok. And if it stops....

 

As ever, just my opinion...

[三江源]

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Edited March 26, 2015 by 三江源

[Ian]

Behavioural psychology works from the outside in. Encouraging people to act 'as if ' they have the qualities they desire ie confidence, assertiveness, etc, their experiences back up inside them to create a new reality and voila, they have the qualities they aped.

 

I don't believe they do then have the qualities they aped. I believe they then think they have them. Which may be operationally indistinguishable, but not the same.

[VeeCee]

I don't believe they do then have the qualities they aped. I believe they then think they have them. Which may be operationally indistinguishable, but not the same.

 

I agree with Ian - acting "as if" is not the same as actually being. I think that eventually the cognitive dissonance is eventually going to cause problems (imo). Better to be one's "real" self - warts and all.

 

V.

[Wayfarer64]

The idea of blamelessness - which is one of the ideals of Taoism as I undestand it ; leads me to believe that my activities should not bring about results or conditions that I would feel myself to be at blame for -or guilty about.

 

I think most of us - ( but maybe not those who are actually sociopathic anyway)- do indeed know the difference between right and wrong at a very basic "gut" level... we know when our thoughts and actions are low-down.

 

The whole idea of living for the physical, sexual and hedonisic potentials of life is in itself a lowering of our beings. When we keep our consciousness higher in our efforts; than our efforts and actions will probably have better results -this does not however preclude the fact that no good deed goes unpunished -which has baffled me for a very long time !!!

 

I do not think that there is any proscribed right or wrong in the usual christian morality view of life ( in the west mostly) -that is a reason that Taoism has so much appeal for me...The -" to every seasaon" -there is a reason-ecclesiastical -way of thinking... for the Christians -is to my thinking a rightious attitude -

 

So, there is a time to seduce or be seduced, there is a time to kill. There is a time to go to war- it is odious and hateful but sometimes it is needed due to the foilbles of humankinds' nature...

 

But back to topic-HONESTY and compassion are all that is needed to be a good lover. The rest is machanics.

Edited August 29, 2007 by Wayfarer64

[三江源]

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Edited March 26, 2015 by 三江源

[VeeCee]

But back to topic-HONESTY and compassion are all that is needed to be a good lover. The rest is machanics.

 

Yes!

[Pietro]

heh heh! Good point. and - what is the difference between thinking we have something, and actually having it, practically speaking?

 

What is the difference between a dream and reality? That one does not disappear when you wake up. Or you can say if you really have something you are less prone to the pain of discovering that it was all a delusion.

 

Said that there are some things in which believing something might help you to get it. But believing something is not having it. Example you might thinkl you have 1000 dollar in your pocket, and this might give you the confidence to go at an interview and eventually have the job, and then the money. But just believing that is so, it just doesn't work. Especially when you try to pay with it.

 

it is this kind of concept that I think is the more viral and dangerous part of the new age mentality. And the one that most of us received as part of our HT training.

[三江源]

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Edited March 26, 2015 by 三江源

[Pietro]

I always do my best to act with honesty and sincerity - and *gasp* even respect. That leaves little room for PUA games. Hence my long stretch of no babes.

 

It's painful, eh. Been there, suffered that. Somehow my ethics was changed when I started looking deeper in the issue and eventually I made peace with the fact that women are attracted to different kind of guys. When I realised (or rationalised) that it was so because it made sense from an evolutionary point of view I stopped wishing them to be different, and hoping to find the one. Some articles helped me. I'm sure you read this, I link it in every PUA post I make. It is scary how precise it is. I always thought I did not want to go with married women. A woman I met this summer, just after making wild sex at her tent told me: "I need to make a phone call, or it will be too late". So still damp she took the phone and: "Oh darling, how are you? We were just speaking, and it got late...". Then, to me, "my husband". Just as the article describe. I was seeing her, and thinking about the article. This article more than others changed my values. The others is, as Wayfarer calls it "the mechanics".

 

Btw, you know why I eat meat? Because, although I do not like to kill to eat, this diet makes me the healthier. And I believe that being healthy is my duty. And it has a higher priority than not killing animals.

 

Similarly I believe it is my fundamental right to reproduce (and not be tortured daily by my reproductive-hormonal system). I don't think an ethics that makes it so difficult is an acceptable ethics, grounded in this universe. And since women are perfect as they are (because they have evolved to be so), it is me who needs to change. If my ethics requires me not to lie, but reproducing requires me to say some white lies ("Me? I never even thought about having sex with you,... but you did naughty girl!") then so be it.

 

You see, it is not that they are attracted to a different kind of Pietro, and I lie by claiming to be so. It is that they are attracted to a Pietro who can say some light lies and not treat them like mommy. A Pietro who can flirt, and make the world around them spin, and be interesting, and challenging. It is different. They like me when I lie. Even when they can see right through them -although they are not fully sure. It is a different kind of lies, that is why people call it flirting.

[mYTHmAKER]

If you play games you might get laid but you will never have a relationship.

[Leidee]

Hrmm

 

To flirt is to lie? I don't believe so.

 

It is easy to construct behaviour around a set of preferred beliefs. Doesn't mean there is any value to the beliefs.

[freeform]

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Edited December 18, 2019 by freeform

[VeeCee]

 

You see, it is not that they are attracted to a different kind of Pietro, and I lie by claiming to be so. It is that they are attracted to a Pietro who can say some light lies and not treat them like mommy. A Pietro who can flirt, and make the world around them spin, and be interesting, and challenging. It is different. They like me when I lie. Even when they can see right through them -although they are not fully sure. It is a different kind of lies, that is why people call it flirting.

 

But what does all the lying and game playing do to YOU if it is not who you really are? I think that ultimately it has to do some deep lasting damage. So is it really worth it?

 

V.

Edited August 30, 2007 by VeeCee

[Mal]

[beancurdturtle]

where do you live, turtle?

 

Maybe you'd have more luck if you make it clear that you practice Yoni worship, and you'll practice till you're perfect...

I live in Orange County, Southern California. Lower left corner of the US.

 

Haha! Bring it on - I'll lavish it with worship.