Taoist Ethics for taoist PUA

[Pero]

We win again, 66-51, still undefeated! :D

Now that I bragged a little, we can go back to topic.

Edited September 8, 2007 by Pero

[三江源]

.

Edited March 26, 2015 by 三江源

[beancurdturtle]

beancurdturtle: this is both an invitation and a test, if I ever saw one.

I've not enough ego to be an exhibitionist. I'd decline the invitation if it really was one, and I'd pass the "not an egomaniac" test.

 

I actually think it was casual flirtation - a handy skill for a PUA. Am I being played?

[VeeCee]

I actually think it was casual flirtation - a handy skill for a PUA. Am I being played?

 

I think I've made it clear that I'm not a player. Just have a goofy sense of humor.

 

V.

[VeeCee]

Crap, how bad does my math suck, I calculated she was 23!

I guess she`s a couple of years too young for me then.

Happy birthday to your daughter.

What? I`m a little confused to what you mean here?

 

I think he's trying to say "it ain't gonna happen." She's under lock and key for another 5 years, at least.

 

V.

[Pero]

I think he's trying to say "it ain't gonna happen." She's under lock and key for another 5 years, at least.

 

V.

 

Then why did you confirm she was single?

Well in 5 years, she would be old enough.

But are you sure she`s under lock and key?

 

[VeeCee]

But are you sure she`s under lock and key?

 

At age 13, she's pretty safe. We'll see what happens in a couple years.

[Pero]

At age 13, she's pretty safe. We'll see what happens in a couple years.

 

Maybe...

[Ian]

 

Cat, howcome, I feel that in your response there is a bit of an agenda? As if you feel that yes, all this Pick up is nice and merry, but the real work is in monogamy? Am I being over reading here, or am I right? What about those people whose ming is to develop a poligamous relationship? What's the next challenge for them?

 

 

You've said before that your ming is to be polygamous. Bearing in mind this quote from you in a previous post....

 

In my job I have to pay attention to what I say. Everything that I say have to be bullet proof true. Provable on the blackboard, chalk in hand, writing equations. At times my work consists in tearing apart claims made by others. That's how good science works. This lead me to be very careful to the claims I make, very careful to the topics I touch. This is even more true since my job lies between different traditional disciplines. Like Biology and Chemistry. Disciplines that I never studied during my math degree, but that I have to apply willy nilly in my job.

So every time I write a paper I need to pay attention that someone from those fields will not disprove it. It makes you humble, as you have to admit all the things that you do not know.

Science also makes you humble in forcing you to write papers with the real state of the art. Not saying this is so, but this could be an explenation. We suppose that... . An educated guess would be that... . Because really you don't know. It takes many many experiments from different point of views before a theory is accepted, and considered part of the standard paradigma. And this is good.

I tend to use the same language also when I write on the internet. In fact I even tend to think along those lines.

 

....how can you be scientifically sure that your ming is to be polygamous, and it's not merely that your restless, sensation-hungry, thrill seeking mind is making justification for the variety it wants?

[Pietro]

You've said before that your ming is to be polygamous. Bearing in mind this quote from you in a previous post....

....how can you be scientifically sure that your ming is to be polygamous, and it's not merely that your restless, sensation-hungry, thrill seeking mind is making justification for the variety it wants?

 

Well, of course I am not. At least fully. In fact, working in science, I don't even know what does it mean to be scientifically sure? We are not so sure about things. We tend to be quite full of doubts.

 

But the problem with the ming is that is an ancient chinese concept, that (at the present time) is had to measure, if it is possible at all. What is the ming?

 

In fact I am not even sure there is a ming that is independent from the body you have. Example, the amount of testosterone (free? I suppose), that a male has is correlated with the probability for him to divorce. There have been studies that has been done, and I found the data in The Alchemy of Love and Lust.

Now, what is the relation between the free testosterone that a person has and his relationship ming? Are they independent or is ming just a way to pack together a series of charatteristics, that makes a person fit well into a certain lifestyle. In other words even if it was just (and why is a just?) the restless, sensation-hungry, thrill seeking mind this might be coming from some blockages in my bodies (physical/energetic/...), but it might also be coming from the fact that my body when is living in its natural state, produces more testosterone. And this, through a cascade of hormones, being activated, produces the effect you describe above.

 

From my understanding, and from my experience, there is a difference between what you are good in doing and what gives you a deep sense of satisfaction when you do it. And I think/feel/believe/has-noticed/has-experienced that is this deep sense of satisfaction that more tells us about the ming of a person. Or at least, this is what I refer to when I speak about my ming. Not being measurable, we have to accept those descriptions as definitions.

Now, I had various girlfriends in my life. Only in one case, and just for few days, did I stopped looking to other women. I was deeply inside still searching. This has happened in a time span of several years. I always felt I wanted more women. I felt one was not enough for me. Well, lately through PU I was able to be in the situation where I had more girls willing to be intimate with me. We weren't in a formal relationship, nor did they knew each other (apart vaguely knowing that they were not alone, and I had 'others'), well in that period I felt a deeper sensation of rest. Of satisfaction. Would three give me even more rest and satisfaction? Or would I feel that it is too much. I don't know (I am obviously open to try it, PM me in case ). So I cannot tell you where exactly my ming lies. And this is why I don't say: my ming is to be bigamous. But I more generally say poligamous. As I said I try to be precise when I write. Sometimes, (also to make my posts readable) I might not put all the dots on the i's. Especially in a discussion. But you might be right. I might adapt my language to my audience more than I am happy to admit. I do notice that I put an awful lot of clarifications (I think, I assume, I believe) but maybe I was exagerating when I said I did it all the time.

 

Cat, I haven't answered your question, mostly because I don't understand it either. I shall try to read it slower, lately. Please don't take any offence, I seem to have big language issue with all the meditators communities those days.

[Trunk]

Trunk, your post about the shen of PUArtistry was spot on, of course.

Thanks. I knew that this thread was rich with angles on 'shen theory', but it's been a tough topic for me to crack, and it took several tries at writing that post before I could say anything coherent (or anything at all, really).

 

 

Interesting what you say about your own experiences of organ shen. ... and for myself I have found my spleen to be deeply yin and it has taken a long time and a lot of relating ... to get in good communication with all the organ shen. .. it's been very rewarding to persevere with them. I have fed them all, seperately, orgasmic energy, and the way they take the energy and the way they individually reach their own climax, really gives an insight into "who they are".

Impressive. This is the first time that anyone has spoke about relating to organ shen, where I get the sense that you have actually done it. Thank you for communicating, really helpful.

[Wayfarer64]

hi Pietro, I knew it came off a bit that way, as if I had an agenda. Which I dont. It's a model of individuation, that I was referring to. I'm not aware of what will happen to indiividuation in the scenario you describe. I dont see where it leaves room for Eros, which brings with it the deep need for exclusive possession. The soul gets a dose of Eros to knock the ego off it's perch and bring some flames and juice to what is becoming dry in the psyche. I wonder what jealousy/ies might appear and cracks in the brickwork.

I'd like to know more about the soul need for a harem.

I think it's interesting. Very interesting. I think it is such a common thought : that one husband/wife is not enough to meet all the needs. Yet it is an Ideal in many people\s minds to have a Soul Mate. To have someone who really sees you and knows you. How easy it to get that in one person, let alone in enough people to have a harem.

 

I think the challenges in polygamy are things that you can tell us about already. What are they?

 

When I had a lot of people around me, all of whom I loved and cared for,and it was reciprocated, I still wanted one person. One river deep mountain high person. But why one? I dont know if it is a pragmatic matter of time and space, or if , ultimately , if you have more than one lover, you are keeping a trap door open between you and that other person which in some energetic way means that they are held at arms length.

 

I will continue thinking about it. Maybe a lot of people would be happier with the arangement you are outlining. Do you think it is a particular personality type that has this as their ming?

I know that for sure long term monogamy is work. And work gives us a lot. And I know people in their 50's who have never settled down or sat in the vessel, have an insubstantial air. To my perception.

 

and BTW. I am thinking taoist lovemaking, even in seperate tents, would be a bit de trop for a 13 year old..

 

 

I want to peep into a few of these ideas...

 

 

BEING Insubstantial may be the goal for some . Going on an intrnal(lonely) journey that leads beyond the chosen/dictated) path of any given society and creates a new path -the edge of the razon -as it were...For one's own being to live on...

 

 

NOT Being part of the social norm - their reality - gives them a status (as social beings)- that only makes

them someone who is living a different reality-

 

I see it then, as being perceptions that become a way to see who/what they are as individuals

For a seeker who is trying to go beyond the mundane and expected paths that so many ASSUME is the only accepted pattern of life...

 

Non attachment may be their way to become awakened... or maybe not...For some it is the long-term partnering that brings them to a state of harmony with life - -which is a pretty good step to have taken...for them-

harmony with life can be found anywhere -it is a matter of us knowing ourselves well enough to abide as we grow...

Edited September 11, 2007 by Wayfarer64

[beancurdturtle]

harmony with life can be found anywhere -it is a matter of us knowing ourselves well enough to abide as we grow...

ding, ding, ding, ding, ding!...

 

Correct answer!

[三江源]

.

Edited March 26, 2015 by 三江源

[Wayfarer64]

I agree, if one spent a few years in a cave, one would be confronted with oneself as relentlessly as within a committed and enduring relationship.

 

we all know how easy it is to slide into nice ideas about oneself and complacencies, if we go unchallenged.

 

 

I for one have seldom -if ever, been complacent. Restlessness is a far stronger trait in most who do not wish to settle down. A cave offers one little of reality to ponder as one ponders oneself, and then all you are left with is yr intrinsic nature.

 

This is not much to show for yr time if what you are working towards is just not found at those very basic levels of introspection...

 

 

I'd venture a guess that, it is the depth of knowledge as well as the quality of knowledge that can translate into levels of being and DOING that actually transmit a connection to the path where one is becoming closer tobeing "blameless" in the Taoist sense-as one makes their way through life.

 

For me it is a progressive journey with many ways to be me and hopefully a better me as I go along. To be able to do this with another person as a couple is twice as difficult an operation.

 

 

So I think anyway can be come one's way to being one's best self... which may be found in both self reflection or using those around us as "sounding boards to our observed selves"

[Trunk]

new acronym:

afsc: average frustrated spiritual chump

[markern]