How do you tolerate intolerance, accept negativity and generally cope with extremely detrimental individuals around you? How to cultivate here?

[4bsolute]

I have tried turtling completely up. Which is nothing but bathing in your own ignorance. Doesnt help. Might last a few hours but then its opening up again.

 

Speaking of opening up - I truly wonder where our beloved spiritual masters have learned to open up and develop compassion. Here we are again on the top of a mountain or behind monastic doors. Can this be IT??

 

Next: Accepting. The next day I wake up or come out of a meditation I see my environment more clearly and get all the negativity straight in my face. Especially from mentioned very detrimental individuals which happen to be "family" members.

 

My intention is to work in alignment with all elements and understand underlying principles so I understand that I will not get around these feelings that I feel so heavy on myself that I could just cry at least twice a day.

 

Generally this happens that I see more and more clearly how people intoxicate themselves and say out loud that they have clear vision of circumstances/arguement, 100% believing it. Numb people who unconsciously hurt and hurt and hurt. Negative expressions became standards?! The other day in a chinese restaurant, the only other people who were in was another family who were talking about problems the entire conversation, cursing left and right. Bon appetit!

 

How do you come into a place of accepting with the unspeakable gigantique garbage dump all around? I am living in a place where we have no spiritual roots, just very shallow religious branches. Thanks again Romans and Christianity for cutting them down in the year ~300/400.

 

How on earth would one cultivate virtues here, like the very basic Healing Light of the Tao (Mantak Chia) when I have already trouble even generating love in my heart - to connect to the loving field all around me? What act it is to even feel my thymus through all this emotional mud

 

I practice and then -BAM- negativity from here and there, feeling it in my system, having to get it out again first and then being able to somewhat continue. With an already tangibly weakened spirit. Can you imagine what Work this is?

 

Not to speak of how long it takes to fully calm down again, relax every miniscule muscle to properly utilize your breath..

 

And then there would be the solution of seeing life as a comedy. But again that is just another layer of fantasy upon it. Oh how wonderfully and easy you can stroll through life when you hear said extremelly yelling father here in my neighborhood and call him just underdeveloped or "Oh look here we go again, haha!" while totally neglecting the impact of his actions on others in his family and in the surrounding neighborhood. And that is just One example of many.

 

Having seen soil turn so sour that only moss grows upon it, while years back actual grass was there? Or lichens on trees all around the house, rotting the trees slowly? Welcome to our garden. But hey at least family members shoo away woodpecker who "harm" the trees. God...

 

Every conversation with said "family" members on how to improve their thought patterns and actions is instantly understood as assault. And how often do I come to a point where I say to myself "Why even further care? Just let it all happen as it flows.. parents living a detrimental lifestyle, neighbors abusing their kids" - Welcome to the 21st century of living in a community, not caring for the community. Ohh only when its about positivity, when something negative comes up We shut our eyes ears and mouth!

 

What mad pit I am in here..

 

Are you sensitive enough how much trouble the earth currently has? What else is there before a call out for a mass wipe?

 

Asking from a livingspace on the country side in an outskirts of a larger "family" community.. not in a city. Is cultivating impossible these days in a general human environment?

Edited July 12, 2014 by 4bsolute

[Marblehead]

Remember, cultivating an aspect of ourself such as this is an internal thing, not external. What I suggest is that these negatives that set you back are not things you should be concerned with.

 

I'm not a good example to say this but sometimes we need to just keep our mouth shut and allow our mind, soul and spirit to determine what happened, what our responsive thoughts were and, most importantly, why.

 

Being tolerant has two levels. The first are those things that effect us (or things we have a vested interest it) and the second are those things that do not effect us (or things we have no vested interest in).

 

The second should never cause us anxiety. The first must be dealt with. The circumstances will dictate how these things should be dealt with. (We will find that oftentime we are the very source of the problem.)

Edited July 21, 2014 by Marblehead

[4bsolute]

Yes but how can you cultivate internally (and then act upon externally of course) when you feel the external pushing so hard on the inside? Therefor the question of intoxication arises. To this I include processed sugar without a doubt! I can deal with everything when I get sugar during the day, but without? "Oh whats going on with you, why are you not happy?"

 

Yes, this is also to some extend my approach to life but you have left out the second point and it is all about the second point.

 

Really, I would live a blissful life only caring for myself. And I do to 90% but whenever I start caring for others, opening up to my surroundings, an internal hell breaks lose. Ask other empaths. Funny even having the term that there are non-empaths out there. Feel emotions! and then stop eating sugar and lets have a conversation again how you "survive" the day!

 

Becoming sensitive to fundamental aspects of life itself while ignoring certain aspects to it? How would that work? It's impossible that we have to live ignorant to some degree to manage this life.

 

For this conversation you need to have a properly developed Right Brain. I hope that this is not too much asked for..

Edited July 12, 2014 by 4bsolute

[Unseen_Abilities]

Been in a similar situation for a long time myself. Tough thing, being naturally more introverted and relatively private, but also very energetically connected to the collective consciousness, which here is naturally more extroverted and generally...not a good fit for me. It will be interesting to travel more in the future and see what this is like in other countries.

 

I still don't know what to make of Karma, but the fact is I was born an energetic sponge (amongst other things) that naturally soaks up garbage from the environment.

 

One thing that's worked for me is to reframe it so that, no matter what, my spirit ultimately becomes stronger as a result of it all. Also, working on transmuting the energy I collect into something of value that I can then put back out there is, although difficult, a very good thing to do - don't be afraid of getting angry about it, just do something valuable with that anger - create, train, do SOMETHING with it.

 

Just my two cents.

Edited July 12, 2014 by Unseen_Abilities

[Aetherous]

Dealing with family members can be very challenging.

Suggestions... Instead of attempting to avoid all negativity, try to just make choices that are good. Focus on what you can do, rather than what is happening to you ("when life hands you lemons..."). Let the negativity just wash over you instead of trying to get rid of it. Avoidance and trying to shut out a part of the world, is negative and makes you open to negativity from others...whereas openness and acceptance are positive. Not a feeling of openness and acceptance, but actively doing those things. Cultivating has more to do with your decisions than it does what you feel and pick up from others. It's not such a bad thing to feel bad things...that's life. It's actually a good thing to face it directly, with bravery. Once again, it's about making a choice, rather than being assaulted by unwanted feelings and trying to shoo them away.

Making decisions and taking action, making a choice that goes against the current...establishes boundaries in your psychic life...which means that you won't be so "sensitive" in the negative sense of the word. Boundaries with family members are especially good.

 

Also, I would definitely not attempt to change anyone...most importantly, family members. Just don't even talk about spiritual stuff with them, and you'll be much better off. Focus your cultivation only on yourself. Just some ideas from me on this kind of thing.

[Marblehead]

Regretfully I cannot answer these additional questions because they are all internal to you specifically.

 

You have had your personal experiences in life that have caused you to be in the state you are presently in. I have no way of seeing these experiences. Sometimes you cannot even see them and rationalize them.

 

Thing is, we do care about things in life. That's natural, I think. It is a very rare person who is truely apathetic.

 

To the internal part I am talking about "Why do I feel this way about such and such?" Know thyself so that you may know others.

 

The external part take practice. Parctice. And more practice. Including self examination.

[Seeker of Wisdom]

Perhaps this may help?

 

The Four Immeasurables

 

These are four virtues which are about our attitudes towards beings, including ourselves. They are called immeasurable because we should aim to apply them to all beings, in all circumstances, at all times.

 

While bodhichitta isn't emphasised until the second turning, this aspect of the first turning forms such a great level of compassion that, if you are truly adept at it, you are either a bodhisattva or just a focus of intent away from being one.

 

First is loving-kindness, the desire for beings to be happy. If you read that word between 'the' and 'for' again, you'll see again why the difference between craving and desire is, as I said earlier, so important.

 

Second is compassion, the desire for beings to be free of suffering (or in bodhichitta, dukkha as a whole).

 

Third is sympathetic joy - taking pleasure in the pleasure of beings, their successes, and their virtues or noble actions. Why their virtue? Because of the knowledge that those actions have brought or will bring pleasure to themselves and others, counteracting the tendency to look for flaws in others. Also, it encourages your own mind to follow that example.

 

Fourth is equanimity, considering the happiness and suffering of any being to be of equal importance to that of any other. This removes unbalanced sentimentality from your compassion. If suffering matters and happiness matters, but not who they happen to, you can do what you can manage without crying about everyone you can't help.

 

 

It's significant that these apply to oneself, not just everyone else. This counters the self-flagellating tendency some people have around compassionate stuff. In the short-term it's generous to give away everything, but really that means you end up burnt out or needing handouts yourself, which isn't so helpful. An analogy given by the Buddha is that of an acrobat who has to get a firm balance himself before his partner can stand on top of him.

 

This also means we can follow a middle way between letting people walk over us and being vengeful. If we are attacked, we can have compassion for the attacker while defending ourselves. Pacifism based only on fear of conflict or self-hate is weakness, inferior to the compassion of one who jumps an assailant or sentences a murderer to jail for the safety of the public.

 

So, how to cultivate the four immeasurables?

 

They can arise by themselves out of wisdom from other practice, but there are practices for actively encouraging them.

 

Each of the four immeasurables can be used as an object for shamatha. Different approaches range from simply radiating them in all directions to radiating them in one direction at a time (working towards all directions), towards different classes of beings (working towards all classes at once), or sequentially focusing on oneself, a friend, a neutral person, an enemy and all beings.

 

Repeating a phrase such as 'may all beings be happy' can help to generate the relevant immeasurable, and should not be needed at some point when it is stronger.

 

Which approach will be best for you depends on how naturally the immeasurables come to you. The cultivation of the immeasurables seems to me to work based on neuroplasticity - taking however much is available until that way of thinking and feeling becomes stronger, more natural, and broader in scope.

 

For the first three immeasurables, you take what you already feel for yourself and loved ones, and engulf your mind in that feeling until your heart naturally expands to include people you didn't used to particularly care about and, eventually, people you used to hate.

 

For equanimity, you again use what you have to help bring it out more, perhaps starting with the equality of yourself and a loved one. This is easier if the first three immeasurables are already established to a wide range.

I'll also add - we can only become stronger by facing challenges. We can't develop truly robust love if there is nobody around that we could hate, any more than an athlete can become strong lifting up feathers.

 

Hang in there, cultivate the immeasurables - emphasising loving-kindness and compassion for yourself and sympathetic joy and equanimity for the people who bother you - and find some way to have an open heart that's still defended by your ribcage.

 

It's disappointing that most of society seems to be mired in mundane concerns, but we have to accept that all we can do is work on ourselves. Trying to teach people who aren't interested just leads to frustration.

[Chang]

The original question could be described as the the ultimate question for the seeker. The person who can answer it and put that answer into successful practice has indeed reached a very high state of being.

 

Some good advice has already been given and all that I would add is that we are all in the same boat and can simply do the best we can, in the place and situation in which we find ouselves. These few words may help in moments of stress.

 

"Grant yourself a moment of peace and you will realise how foolishly you have scurried about.

Learn to be silent and you will notice that you have talked much too much.

Be kind and you will realise that your judgement of others was too severe."

Tschen Tschi Ju

[4bsolute]

Been in a similar situation for a long time myself. Tough thing, being naturally more introverted and relatively private, but also very energetically connected to the collective consciousness, which here is naturally more extroverted and generally...not a good fit for me. It will be interesting to travel more in the future and see what this is like in other countries.

 

I still don't know what to make of Karma, but the fact is I was born an energetic sponge (amongst other things) that naturally soaks up garbage from the environment.

 

One thing that's worked for me is to reframe it so that, no matter what, my spirit ultimately becomes stronger as a result of it all. Also, working on transmuting the energy I collect into something of value that I can then put back out there is, although difficult, a very good thing to do - don't be afraid of getting angry about it, just do something valuable with that anger - create, train, do SOMETHING with it.

 

Just my two cents.

 

What I do in these situations is similar, I make the best out of it.

 

You do not worry about Karma. The idea of Karma is just uncomfortable from a human perspective, spirit loves to dive into it, to expand. Uncomfortable from a human perspective due to fantasy and misconceptions of "hell" and "suffering". Believe me, this is hell, there is no greater hell. Emotional hell, is hell. There is no hell down below, in a seperate dimension.

There should be no worries, since you can work out all Karma in one lifetime doing various Exercises like Primordial Qigong, which neutralize all Karma. Neutralize not in a sense of *pouf gone* but rather Karma being presented to you, everywhere you are, right here and right now. Why? Because you wash yourself with cleaner Personal, earthly and primal heavenly energies. Those karmic, energetic patterns can not stay. I simply watched my first lesson yesterday and had my greatest dump in years. Sounds very crude, probably gross, but it was as it is. Even just watching it, something had to move.

 

This is where I am also. Naturally I am always the one who made everyone smile and laugh and naturally was the one being bullied in school. Everyone wants a piece. Was never different. Also I soak up everything. Similar my girlfriend. But it is very helpful to have likeminded around you, to perfect your methods on how to deal and solve situations.

 

The trouble with being a sponge slowly dissolves through learning of energy transformation, negative into possitive. Several methods out there and very easy. So easy that you might doubt they work. But they work! Intensely.

 

-

 

I want to add, that interestingly enough, after this extremely arguement I had today (loads of it in the past, slight bettering this year) I could let go off my emotions very fast. I felt very sad, rooted myself with an extensive horse stance, lateron cried and then quickly went into a short meditation, connected to my heart and the tangible Universal Love all around us and drew that Energy into my heart, through my mideye brow. This is so transformative, that around 5minutes later everything went better so fast!

 

I am very new to this that I am literally suprised by the effects on my emotions and on my entire system. Before I had thoughts of genocide, can you imagine? They were all neutralized. I did not eat, did not stimulate myself in any other form other than connecting to this energy.

Edited July 12, 2014 by 4bsolute

[4bsolute]

The original question could be described as the the ultimate question for the seeker. The person who can answer it and put that answer into successful practice has indeed reached a very high state of being.

 

Some good advice has already been given and all that I would add is that we are all in the same boat and can simply do the best we can, in the place and situation in which we find ouselves. These few words may help in moments of stress.

 

"Grant yourself a moment of peace and you will realise how foolishly you have scurried about.

Learn to be silent and you will notice that you have talked much too much.

Be kind and you will realise that your judgement of others was too severe."

Tschen Tschi Ju

 

It feels funny where I am now, compared to before. And I love seeing myself answering my own questions again. Already happened a few times on this forum in the past. Who is this "seeker" you speak about?

 

Judgement lead me to the arguement today. I foresee often where people go in the near future, through the very action they do in a critical moment. But apparently it is not wanted and I get heavily attacked, when ever I do it. My girlfriend 1:1 the same picture with her family, we have a good laugh about it. Today I did not knew if I should laugh or what to do else, so I shrugged it off and let it go away.

 

Where is this initial seriousness coming from? Inexperience?

Edited July 12, 2014 by 4bsolute

[4bsolute]

Oh and I want to add, that these energy practices with Higher Energies makes it very easy for oneself to stay (or be more often) in a state of faster regeneration from such negativity and therefor leaving the individuals causing damage surprised, by oneself being non attached to their creation. No resentment, no revenge. The goodness shines through and boy is it strong!

[Chang]

A seeker in this context is simply one who sees that there are higher states of consciousness and who therefor seeks them out.

 

We can only do our best and work on ourselves. It does not pay to be too judgemental of others and you may also find that advice should be given sparingly and only when asked for; pointing out to someone that there actions or lifestyle will lead to disaster will seldom gain you their thanks.

 

If we can do this then our relationships with others can run more smoothly.

[sunchild]

Pacifism based only on fear of conflict or self-hate is weakness, inferior to the compassion of one who jumps an assailant or sentences a murderer to jail for the safety of the public. - Seeker of Tao

 

i don't agree with much of what you said in your post, but specifically i don't agree with this.

to me this is just another of your egoistic musings.

 

to suggest that 'evil'/'good' are anything but your personal perception, and cultural conditioning, is false.

 

It's disappointing that most of society seems to be mired in mundane concerns, but we have to accept that all we can do is work on ourselves. Trying to teach people who aren't interested just leads to frustration.

^herein lies profound irony.

 

Seeker of Tao how do you win a game with no rules?

 

if someone likes pepsi, why are you going to try and teach them about the wonders of coca cola?

[Seeker of Wisdom]

...to me this is just another of your egoistic musings...

Well, you're welcome to feel that way.

 

I'm not trying to be a teacher. I'm still new to this stuff, loads of the people here have much more knowledge and experience than me.

 

But if someone asks a question and I feel like I have something to say that might be helpful, or if no question was asked but I feel like writing something anyway, I'll say it. I won't just put it aside for a few years until I feel worthy.

 

I don't know you, maybe you're a great cultivator, maybe you're even less experienced than me and just don't like me.

 

Either way, if I come off as arrogant from what I say or how I say it, please tell me exactly what the problem is, because I need all the guidance I can get. Arrogance is definitely one of my flaws, and if you can call me out on it for me, cheers.

 

*edit* if you want to talk to me more about this, click the 2nd link in my sig.

Edited July 12, 2014 by Seeker of Tao

[silent thunder]

It seems like a magnetic resonance to me, negativity in culture and society.

It sucks me in like gravity or magnetic compulsion at times.

 

My intention and my daily practice in cultivation seem to be my only armor and it is full of holes. The negativity, like smoke finds the smallest opening and floods into my sense of self.

 

Still, in spite of my constant failure, I will sit, stand and walk into the storm again and continue with my intent.

 

My endgame from this perspective is the 'resolution of the opposites', but there are times when this seems an implausible feat.

 

Thanks for posting this topic... timely and needed on this end, I'll be watching closely.

[PLB]

One element I remind myself of often is how the time things take to happen has different kinds of consequences.

At one end of the scale is the emergency that requires the quickest response. Life hangs in the balance.

At the other end of the scale is the way decisions bring about results that won't appear for many years in this life or even after it is done.

What I love about the practice is that it knits those two ends together. It changes things.

[Spotless]

Some take the Pinball machine to be a model for their path - not by choice generally but by injury.

 

One can become specialized in knowing what they do not like, what is wrong with the world, what is infectious and what they deem bad or evil.

 

Effectively they become a bumper room and their life force is primarily undirected and moves about in a fog banging from one mangled dislike to another - eating up a profound amount of energy in the process and creating grooves in the energy field.

 

The resistance is a vibrational replica of that which it "dislikes", so the 2 gradually find resonance.

 

Qi Gong would do wonders as an accomplice to easing off of the automated chatter that has been set up in your "defense".

It is difficult to disengage from the inner chatter - but the Qi Gong movements will help to re-calibrate and re-integrate each step in the right direction. Yoga will do the same and it is often offered for free somewhere like the YMCA and elsewhere.

 

Postures and practice by themselves offer some respite from the mind. You will not tackle this from mind.

You must look lower - the rage sets up in the third chakra and in your case the arms and heart.

 

Look up "correct thinking" - very simple concept that is overlooked until advanced practice makes its review a requirement.

Drop all blogging or internet reading that reinforces your "defenses" - those endless tapes in your head.

Take in nature through your abilities, typically if you are an empath your are also clairsentient - breath in and come to know nature and nature spirits, the pulse of the earth - do not concede your energies to trivial battles that drive you from yourself. Drop all consideration for the past and do not plan the future.

 

Master correct thinking, do posture movement practice and find also in your heart what "I Am" likes - do not specialize in knowing what the you that is not you is repelled by.

 

Your parents / family know not what they do - love them - but you do not need to become their bumper table or anyone else's.

Edited July 13, 2014 by Spotless

[nestentrie]

Master correct thinking, do posture movement practice and also find in your heart what "I Am" likes - do not specialize in knowing what the you that is not you is repelled by.

Your parents / family know not what they do - love them - but you do not need to become their bumper table or anyone else's.

 

Brilliant. WIth that I almost forget what the Original Post was.

Edited July 13, 2014 by nestentrie

[GrandmasterP]

I have tried turtling completely up. Which is nothing but bathing in your own ignorance. Doesnt help. Might last a few hours but then its opening up again.

 

Speaking of opening up - I truly wonder where our beloved spiritual masters have learned to open up and develop compassion. Here we are again on the top of a mountain or behind monastic doors. Can this be IT??

 

Next: Accepting. The next day I wake up or come out of a meditation I see my environment more clearly and get all the negativity straight in my face. Especially from mentioned very detrimental individuals which happen to be "family" members.

 

My intention is to work in alignment with all elements and understand underlying principles so I understand that I will not get around these feelings that I feel so heavy on myself that I could just cry at least twice a day.

 

Generally this happens that I see more and more clearly how people intoxicate themselves and say out loud that they have clear vision of circumstances/arguement, 100% believing it. Numb people who unconsciously hurt and hurt and hurt. Negative expressions became standards?! The other day in a chinese restaurant, the only other people who were in was another family who were talking about problems the entire conversation, cursing left and right. Bon appetit!

 

How do you come into a place of accepting with the unspeakable gigantique garbage dump all around? I am living in a place where we have no spiritual roots, just very shallow religious branches. Thanks again Romans and Christianity for cutting them down in the year ~300/400.

 

How on earth would one cultivate virtues here, like the very basic Healing Light of the Tao (Mantak Chia) when I have already trouble even generating love in my heart - to connect to the loving field all around me? What act it is to even feel my thymus through all this emotional mud

 

I practice and then -BAM- negativity from here and there, feeling it in my system, having to get it out again first and then being able to somewhat continue. With an already tangibly weakened spirit. Can you imagine what Work this is?

 

Not to speak of how long it takes to fully calm down again, relax every miniscule muscle to properly utilize your breath..

 

And then there would be the solution of seeing life as a comedy. But again that is just another layer of fantasy upon it. Oh how wonderfully and easy you can stroll through life when you hear said extremelly yelling father here in my neighborhood and call him just underdeveloped or "Oh look here we go again, haha!" while totally neglecting the impact of his actions on others in his family and in the surrounding neighborhood. And that is just One example of many.

 

Having seen soil turn so sour that only moss grows upon it, while years back actual grass was there? Or lichens on trees all around the house, rotting the trees slowly? Welcome to our garden. But hey at least family members shoo away woodpecker who "harm" the trees. God...

 

Every conversation with said "family" members on how to improve their thought patterns and actions is instantly understood as assault. And how often do I come to a point where I say to myself "Why even further care? Just let it all happen as it flows.. parents living a detrimental lifestyle, neighbors abusing their kids" - Welcome to the 21st century of living in a community, not caring for the community. Ohh only when its about positivity, when something negative comes up We shut our eyes ears and mouth!

 

What mad pit I am in here..

 

Are you sensitive enough how much trouble the earth currently has? What else is there before a call out for a mass wipe?

 

Asking from a livingspace on the country side in an outskirts of a larger "family" community.. not in a city. Is cultivating impossible these days in a general human environment?

Hello 4bsolute.

Thank you for that post.

If it's any comfort at all please rest assured that as you get older these current priorities of yours will shift.

The world, along with the multiverse; is no doubt unfolding as it should.

Chen XiYi the hermit reminds us in that poem of his.....

 

"Be still like a mountain

Rooted like a tree

then move like water.

Soft and supple, gathering Qi.

As your movements flow...

Search for the meaning of the Tao..

and follow its natural way."

 

Hope that helps.

Edited July 13, 2014 by GrandmasterP

[manitou]

The way I see it, all Past, Present, and Future are Now. So....in essence, this has all already played out. We're just going through the motions and playing our parts - like actors on a stage.

 

Love is the answer. Doesn't matter if they love you back or not. Love is the best offense, to me. This type of agape love can be achieved once the self-importance of ourselves is lost.

 

Plus....look back over your life and see how many times something you judged as 'negative' at first, turned out to be the best thing that ever happened to you. I think that's why it's pointless to label anything as negative or positive.

Edited July 13, 2014 by manitou

[GrandmasterP]

Spot on Manitou.

Good can come from bad in many unexpected and marvellous ways.

Said it before.

One tutor we had at uni was a mean, careless person who was always late to class and sometimes smelt of booze.

She 'mislaid' some student projects, was tardy with what bit of marking she did do and when she did mark something nobody could decipher her comments.

Absolutely useless she was and should have been sacked, but back then; that was a rare occurrence.

Every week that semester she 'taught' us I learnt a bit more from that teacher how NOT to deal with students and those lessons have served me well.

Edited July 13, 2014 by GrandmasterP

[4bsolute]

It seems like a magnetic resonance to me, negativity in culture and society.

It sucks me in like gravity or magnetic compulsion at times.

 

My intention and my daily practice in cultivation seem to be my only armor and it is full of holes. The negativity, like smoke finds the smallest opening and floods into my sense of self.

 

Still, in spite of my constant failure, I will sit, stand and walk into the storm again and continue with my intent.

 

My endgame from this perspective is the 'resolution of the opposites', but there are times when this seems an implausible feat.

 

Thanks for posting this topic... timely and needed on this end, I'll be watching closely.

 

Isnt it? I just came home from a visit to my girlfriend, out from the cities, the crude energies and I could nearly cry out of nowhere. I dont even understand why. I even asked for it while I was driving home, what this is: If I should accept all emotions as the same, positive and negative. But this was not the point. Clearly something very deeply is going wrong here with our approach to spirituality of including both concepts. Forget negativity, we do not work with negativity other than transforming it. I am sick of my Self being stuck in it.

 

Every day a deep effort in not identifying with these emotions. Yes, I allow myself to identify with positive, uplifting emotions. It is my birthright to do so. Otherwise I will be never able to create for goodness. There has to be a minimum positivity each day to live. Where do we get with a day half good, half bad? We want stability. Stability is not found in 50% shit 50% roses. Something more profound needs to be discovered.

 

This negativity is like glue, like mire sticking to your feet and sucking you in. My girlfriend is so empathic that she feels every emotional state am I in. And she noticed that two women today, on our sightseeing trip we had, were disgusted by me, wondering why it felt so "wrong" near me. And I then recalled that situation, when she told me about those women and their reaction towards me, that I initially did not feel very well where I was standing, with the people around me.

 

Cultivation energy, bringing more virtues in, for some reason - I lack the wisdom at the moment why this is the case - also can strenghten negative emotions you carry. And they become so loud, that they are felt by your surroundings in an instant. You clearly do not temper foolishly with these things. But at the same time just pause and imagine for one moment what beneficial effects this has: Increasing your being with higher energies and then automatically benefiting your surroundings with this positivity. Because I have already made experience with beneficial energies, such as others being affected my calmness after meditative sessions. But at that time, I didnt really believe in it. Now its totally different. I have my evidence that it works.

 

My sole problem at the moment: How do I quickly get rid of negative emotional states. I have never learned how to transform them, send them into the earth, what so ever. When I feel them affecting me, it is like they cling so hard, I feel it like jumping off a bridge. And I am not kidding. Before these practices I saw myself to be stable.

 

At this point, with this amount of experience - I would highly recommend Not doing any practices that invole raising your energies in an urban environment. Or do you know any monk building his spiritual foundation on a garbage dump?

 

 

...

 

no idea why I write this.. But then I was eating in a vietnamese restaurant this evening and shortly before we wanted to leave this young asian female walked into the room, hesitantly asking for a table for one person. She radiated so much innocence. How can someone so delicate survive in an urban environment these days? It was such an awkward moment.. football fans all around, your random uncultivated fellow human beings and then this appearance...

Edited July 13, 2014 by 4bsolute

[4bsolute]

The way I see it, all Past, Present, and Future are Now. So....in essence, this has all already played out. We're just going through the motions and playing our parts - like actors on a stage.

 

Love is the answer. Doesn't matter if they love you back or not. Love is the best offense, to me. This type of agape love can be achieved once the self-importance of ourselves is lost.

 

Plus....look back over your life and see how many times something you judged as 'negative' at first, turned out to be the best thing that ever happened to you. I think that's why it's pointless to label anything as negative or positive.

 

But you clearly saw what you did there? When I am here and it affects me negative, I do care. Because I am here. And not imagine myself (due to memory) already in the future, where it then will feel good, because I have 'somehow survived' the negativity I now am in. Negativity is meant to move OUT of. It is a clear sign of where we DONT want to be.

 

You feel your past negative always as positive, because the underlying principles of our being ARE positive. You did not actively transform your negative emotional states, your emotional memory just forgot the negative affect on your being. But it is a different positivity than our "positve and negative duality debate". Call it a greater positivity. Non-dual. Still it feels what we know as positive, good, pleasant.

 

Please dont form yourself into a being we have terms like 'Borderline' for. Things are very simple. Nature does not concern itself for negative emotions. Negative emotions to mother earth is decay. Mother earth is our closest representation of "nature", the greater "outside nature".

 

Or whatever, yes, there might be parts of our universe, which acts like a playground, really, which you can mess up and possibly blow up. But whats the point if we feel this playground as real and suffer in it. Okay, then blow it all up. Completely and lets move on with this shit. Lessons are learned When we have feelings that the negativity can eat us up, and our external universe reflects the inner, vice versa, would this mean that it really consumes itself. And that stuff goes wrong.

 

So I personally sign out that we can conclude this land of great suffering once and for all. Feel free to join. Oh wait, you didnt hear that quote of Buddha saying "In order to transcend suffering you must accept suffering as it is?" - hmm, wonder why there is no such quote and Buddha always wanted the best for each and everyone. So please, suffer, because it is good for you? Or what? This is disgusting. Shut up and meditate, thank you

 

Ask yourself why do you come out of each deeper meditation with wonderful POSITIVE feelings. They are not balanced in negative And positive way, no, they are clearly and very easily to experience Positive.

 

PS: Ever wondered why you feel good when the sun shines, without you doing Anything? Ohh, again positive and LIFE-AFFIRMING emotions for free. Hm, why is that so? Because it is as it is. Life grows with positivity and decays with negativity. And you are? Life. Or do you know yourself as something different?

 

Negative as Yin is NOT negative feelings. There is clearly a huge misconception. Detrimental has nothing to do with the Yin aspect. Yin Yang is not Good and Bad, such as positive feelings and negative feelings. Huge, huge misconception.

Edited July 13, 2014 by 4bsolute

[Aetherous]

.

Edited July 13, 2014 by Aetherous

[manitou]

But you clearly saw what you did there? When I am here and it affects me negative, I do care. Because I am here. And not imagine myself (due to memory) already in the future, where it then will feel good, because I have 'somehow survived' the negativity I now am in. Negativity is meant to move OUT of. It is a clear sign of where we DONT want to be.

 

You feel your past negative always as positive, because the underlying principles of our being ARE positive. You did not actively transform your negative emotional states, your emotional memory just forgot the negative affect on your being. But it is a different positivity than our "positve and negative duality debate". Call it a greater positivity. Non-dual. Still it feels what we know as positive, good, pleasant.

 

Please dont form yourself into a being we have terms like 'Borderline' for. Things are very simple. Nature does not concern itself for negative emotions. Negative emotions to mother earth is decay. Mother earth is our closest representation of "nature", the greater "outside nature".

 

Or whatever, yes, there might be parts of our universe, which acts like a playground, really, which you can mess up and possibly blow up. But whats the point if we feel this playground as real and suffer in it. Okay, then blow it all up. Completely and lets move on with this shit. Lessons are learned When we have feelings that the negativity can eat us up, and our external universe reflects the inner, vice versa, would this mean that it really consumes itself. And that stuff goes wrong.

 

So I personally sign out that we can conclude this land of great suffering once and for all. Feel free to join. Oh wait, you didnt hear that quote of Buddha saying "In order to transcend suffering you must accept suffering as it is?" - hmm, wonder why there is no such quote and Buddha always wanted the best for each and everyone. So please, suffer, because it is good for you? Or what? This is disgusting. Shut up and meditate, thank you

 

Ask yourself why do you come out of each deeper meditation with wonderful POSITIVE feelings. They are not balanced in negative And positive way, no, they are clearly and very easily to experience Positive.

 

PS: Ever wondered why you feel good when the sun shines, without you doing Anything? Ohh, again positive and LIFE-AFFIRMING emotions for free. Hm, why is that so? Because it is as it is. Life grows with positivity and decays with negativity. And you are? Life. Or do you know yourself as something different?

 

Negative as Yin is NOT negative feelings. There is clearly a huge misconception. Detrimental has nothing to do with the Yin aspect. Yin Yang is not Good and Bad, such as positive feelings and negative feelings. Huge, huge misconception.

 

 

Not quite sure what you said there, 4bsolute - but I am sorry if I pushed a button.

 

You can call me Borderline if you wish - just don't call me Shirley.

Edited July 13, 2014 by manitou