lack of masculine energy

[bax44]

Lately have been feeling very drained of what id call "masculine" energy. Like that fire in your belly that drives you to achieve, be better, etc. I suffered a prolonged illness this summer where I lost 10-15 pounds. It seems the only time I get some of this spark back is when I go on long retention streaks. When I release, its as if my soul leaves me lol, leaving me vulnerable and over emotional. I practice meditation at least an hour a day and workout when my energy level allows. anyone with any ideas? practices? Ive had low T on and off for years but this lack of "drive" is making life difficult for me at times.

[becomethepath]

There's plently of TCM herbs that build up yang and jing energy. Just do a google search or search through the forums.

[SaiyaMan]

I'd consider some martial arts classes. Or something exciting, new and adventurous, something that'll give you that adrenaline rush, wake up that "fight or flight" reflex in you.

Sometimes you have to push your body a little. Working out only when you feel like it will keep you where you are. Push yourself and workout on a regular basis, regardless of how you feel your energy levels to be. Look into H.I.I.T (High intensity interval training), it increases testosterone and the amount of ATP stored within the muscles, pushing your physical boundaries.

 

I hope it helps

Edited September 26, 2014 by SaiyaMan

[Daeluin]

If the fire inside is waning, find something to re-ignite it. What are you doing here? What are you passionate about? How committed are you to finding and achieving your destiny, and to discovering and unwinding the karmic puzzles you've left for yourself?

 

If your sincerity is deep enough, and if you maintain it by consistent focus and renewal, your fire will get stronger, and will come from deep within, not needing external supplement.

 

Yes, things that release sincerity will put that fire out. These challenges ever come to test our commitment as the pressures within build, and it is when our internal fire cannot overcome the blockages that we end up distracting ourselves by extreme means which release the build-up of pressure externally - sexual release, drugs, overeating, over socializing/partying/working.... but it is important to understand the principle here. Sexual release that is mutually goal oriented can help to use the external for developing the internal. Overworking can serve to develop discipline, even while furthering projects that will serve your employer and hopefully affect some positive return upon your own path, feeding the external so that the external feeds the internal.

 

What is important is to recognize how well things are serving you, and being consistently sincere and present. Sometimes our shadow is dominant, and battling is not appropriate - fighting creates duality within. So sometimes being present and sincere and true to ourselves even as we explore the manifestations of our shadow can be incredibly developmental.

 

Just some reflections from my perspective - I hope you are able to find what you need to renew your light.

[soaring crane]

Lately have been feeling very drained of what id call "masculine" energy. Like that fire in your belly that drives you to achieve, be better, etc.

 

Maybe there's nothing to acheive and you're already as good as they come? Your meditation regime may simply be transforming your body and soul but your mind hasn't yet caught up with the new paradigm.

 

Just a thought. Feminine energy is vastly more powerful, but somewhat mysterious and paradoxical to the western mind. Perhaps you're biginnning to tap into it? That'd be a good thing.

[bax44]

Wow! some very insightful responses this is why I like this place.

 

I'd consider some martial arts classes. Or something exciting, new and adventurous, something that'll give you that adrenaline rush, wake up that "fight or flight" reflex in you.

Sometimes you have to push your body a little. Working out only when you feel like it will keep you where you are. Push yourself and workout on a regular basis, regardless of how you feel your energy levels to be. Look into H.I.I.T (High intensity interval training), it increases testosterone and the amount of ATP stored within the muscles, pushing your physical boundaries.

 

I hope it helps

 

Well I do what I can as far as physical activity. Since my illness I have been having a very difficult time recovering from exercise so its been hit or miss. I used to be hardcore 5-6 days a week when I was totally healthy, boy I miss those days. I love hiit training i may get back into that if My body lets me. Thanks!

 

 

If the fire inside is waning, find something to re-ignite it. What are you doing here? What are you passionate about? How committed are you to finding and achieving your destiny, and to discovering and unwinding the karmic puzzles you've left for yourself?

I feel like Im having a hard time reconciling whats inside me with what I experience on a day to day basis in the real world. Its as if something has shifted and Im really having a hard time relating with people and adding value etc. When Im alone in meditation or even just doing solitary things I feel sometimes a deep ache to do... something, but I cant say for sure what this isI I feel this love in myself but I have no where to put it, it feels like its just there but idk what for. I have moments where its like "i can do anything I want" and have great inspiration. Others its like "Youve made too many mistakes youre completely fucked up and no one will accept you.." Trust me this feels as strange to write as it probably is to read. Ive had a lot of things taken from me that I always associated with my core identity and sometimes its like im in the middle of a huge ocean with no island in sight.

 

If your sincerity is deep enough, and if you maintain it by consistent focus and renewal, your fire will get stronger, and will come from deep within, not needing external supplement.

 

Yes, things that release sincerity will put that fire out. These challenges ever come to test our commitment as the pressures within build, and it is when our internal fire cannot overcome the blockages that we end up distracting ourselves by extreme means which release the build-up of pressure externally - sexual release, drugs, overeating, over socializing/partying/working.... but it is important to understand the principle here. Sexual release that is mutually goal oriented can help to use the external for developing the internal. Overworking can serve to develop discipline, even while furthering projects that will serve your employer and hopefully affect some positive return upon your own path, feeding the external so that the external feeds the internal.

well, when I self ahem released last weekend it was as if this "fire" indeed went out. For some reason for me when Im "retaining"(I know this is a controversial topic here) I seem to become more and more calm, sensitive but not over emotional and in general balanced. Its since I released that all hell has broke loose this week. Deep insecurities, anxieties, fears, over analyzing, wanting to binge on every addictive substance I can find... and a general sense of unease and things not feeling right. I remember before this a deep longing to connect with a girl in a loving way and feeling a deep sadness about a lack of a companion in my life.which is generally not like me. and since having released I just feel..pathetic, needy and generally complete opposite of the way i did before. I feel like no one will accept who I am now..before, I was a professional athlete,(in my younger days) in great shape..now Ive had these health problems and meditation has opened floodgates to..something.Why this is having such a powerful effect on me I dont know, but its disconcerting.(the orgasm leading to these things)

 

What is important is to recognize how well things are serving you, and being consistently sincere and present. Sometimes our shadow is dominant, and battling is not appropriate - fighting creates duality within. So sometimes being present and sincere and true to ourselves even as we explore the manifestations of our shadow can be incredibly developmental.

Thank you. Id assume that what im dealing with are "shadows" it seems like this week Ive done everything I could to sabatoge certain friendships, etc and just generally feeling quite awkward around people. THis is what i meant by lack of masculine energy I feel off center and wobbled.Its like part of me wants to do everything it can to fuck things up for myself and my life..Idk where this comes from but Ive always had a self destructive side to me that even when Im feeling great tries to creep in. It feels like being a "good person" isnt enough sometimes, and Im not sure I really know what "good" is anymore anyways.

 

Just some reflections from my perspective - I hope you are able to find what you need to renew your light.]

 

Awesome thank you. Your post really got to me. Its like you knew exactly what Im experiencing:)

Edited September 26, 2014 by bax44

[i am]

Ever read the TTC? I'm not saying that in an undeveloped person that no drive is a good thing. But for developed ones, this is part of what they strive for, as soaring crane mentioned. I don't know you so I can't say.

 

But when I walk around and realize at times my sex drive is practically non existent, and I'm just content with me and things the way they are, I think "ah, this is nice, maybe I am making progress".

[Aetherous]

Lately have been feeling very drained of what id call "masculine" energy. Like that fire in your belly that drives you to achieve, be better, etc. I suffered a prolonged illness this summer where I lost 10-15 pounds. It seems the only time I get some of this spark back is when I go on long retention streaks. When I release, its as if my soul leaves me lol, leaving me vulnerable and over emotional. I practice meditation at least an hour a day and workout when my energy level allows. anyone with any ideas? practices? Ive had low T on and off for years but this lack of "drive" is making life difficult for me at times.

 

Sunbathe often. Fix the low T somehow...don't over-exert yourself in exercising, but make sure you're getting some squats in your routine. What you feel when releasing is the true effect when done to a certain point (destructive to the soul), and it means you need to back off of releasing that often. Like maybe you go on a long retention streak, but then you do it a few days in a row. Instead of doing it in a row, you should just do one day, then take at least 3 days off. By doing this, you'll ensure that your reserves are being built back up from the release. Drink lots of spring water each day to ensure the system is running properly. If you find a good qigong method, it can help you somewhat.

 

I would also advise you to see a Chinese herbalist/acupuncturist, although I know it can be hard to afford that more than a few times. But it's very worth it, because we're talking at this point about your soul (what you feel is being lost when releasing) and your lifespan as well as quality of life. The practitioner will help you get to a point where these things are no longer concerns, so it's worth the money, to improve your cultivation.

 

Oh yeah, also, it helps to write out your likes and dislikes about your current situation, write down what you can do about those dislikes, write down your goals in terms of what you want your life to be about, and write down your ideal life or if your dreams could come true what that would be like. This will help set you up for success, and is a very masculine practice. Do it often.

Edited September 26, 2014 by Aetherous

[bax44]

Maybe there's nothing to acheive and you're already as good as they come? Your meditation regime may simply be transforming your body and soul but your mind hasn't yet caught up with the new paradigm.

 

Just a thought. Feminine energy is vastly more powerful, but somewhat mysterious and paradoxical to the western mind. Perhaps you're biginnning to tap into it? That'd be a good thing.

 

Haha Id love to believe this all the time. Oh Ive no doubt the practices Ive done have transformed me and for sure* I made a thread a year ago about meditation after only 7 months having some life changing effects) it does feel like Im playing catch up sometimes like my intuition etc is telling me to do certain things but this damned negative voice keeps saying no no no play it safe.. the more I "play it safe" the more unsatisfied I feel. Thanks!

[bax44]

 

Ever read the TTC? I'm not saying that in an undeveloped person that no drive is a good thing. But for developed ones, this is part of what they strive for, as soaring crane mentioned. I don't know you so I can't say.

 

But when I walk around and realize at times my sex drive is practically non existent, and I'm just content with me and things the way they are, I think "ah, this is nice, maybe I am making progress".

 

Ive never read it no. the thing is,its like my drive has changed, to where Im only interested in a deep spiritual connection with someone. DOes that even exist now? Idk. but its not like I have no sex drive, its just totally...different. softer, in a way if that makes sense. I wouldnt mind having some of that raw lust back tho. I mean im only in my mid 30s, and you need some of that to attract a partner.But when I have a good streak of retaining going I can feel the energy in my body and its just this background.. contentment thats always there even when Im sorta depressed.

Edited September 26, 2014 by bax44

[bax44]

Sunbathe often. Fix the low T somehow...don't over-exert yourself in exercising, but make sure you're getting some squats in your routine. What you feel when releasing is the true effect when done to a certain point (destructive to the soul), and it means you need to back off of releasing that often. Like maybe you go on a long retention streak, but then you do it a few days in a row. Instead of doing it in a row, you should just do one day, then take at least 3 days off. By doing this, you'll ensure that your reserves are being built back up from the release. Drink lots of spring water each day to ensure the system is running properly. If you find a good qigong method, it can help you somewhat.

nice this makes perfect sense.

I would also advise you to see a Chinese herbalist/acupuncturist, although I know it can be hard to afford that more than a few times. But it's very worth it, because we're talking at this point about your soul (what you feel is being lost when releasing) and your lifespan as well as quality of life. The practitioner will help you get to a point where these things are no longer concerns, so it's worth the money, to improve your cultivation.

noted.

Oh yeah, also, it helps to write out your likes and dislikes about your current situation, write down what you can do about those dislikes, write down your goals in terms of what you want your life to be about, and write down your ideal life or if your dreams could come true what that would be like. This will help set you up for success, and is a very masculine practice. Do it often.

Yeah I used to do stuff like this all the time, sort of a manifestation type thing. This indeed is pretty powerful its amazing what your subconscious can do. Thanks for taking the time to respond.

[i am]

Well I'm no spiritual expert, doctor or psychologist, but I did stay at a Holiday Inn Express last night, and I'd say that if you get your general health checked out by a doctor, feel physically healthy, and don't feel you have problems with depression, I'd say you sound like you're doing pretty good.

[Daeluin]

Ive had a lot of things taken from me that I always associated with my core identity and sometimes its like im in the middle of a huge ocean with no island in sight.

 

I can relate, in my own way. Much of my early life was drained away by hyper awareness and sensitivity to external elements. At first I was so excited to share mutually with others, but they never reflected my enthusiasm, and I was "broken" long before learning to turn my light inward. But I never gave up. Many years and patterns passed and gradually I let my heart lead me to live in a new state where I immediately found my teacher... though it would be 4 more years before I could adjust to afford the humble school I now attend - but my heart knew deep inside what I needed, and my unwavering commitment to this goal has eventually led me through great healing.

 

Often when we receive messages from outside that what we have isn't wanted, it is a lesson for us to focus inward instead. The people and situations around us will likely remain blind to our gifts until we truly learn to change inside and learn to really love ourselves for all that we are, needing no external validations what-so-ever. It is then that we may begin to become seen by the outside world, but of course recognition is not the path of the tao. The same applies to possessions and anything built-up in the external world. If it continues to be taken from us, we probably don't need it to be whole.

 

True love comes from the embrace you give yourself from the outside in. Nothing is comparable.

[mike 134]

Get your T checked. Replace or take supplements if low. No brainer, really. I need to get mine checked too sex drive is unstable it goes up then suddenly crashes.

[i am]

Or perhaps spirituality and wanting to bone women don't necessarily go hand in hand. Always strange when people on a spiritual site miss this.

[bax44]

It's not about "boning women", if you ready post you'd see that. As a relatively young male who's had chronic health problems I've not experienced a "normal" sexual drive in quite some time. I just want to be able to function. Also the times I've felt the most "spiritual" my drive has been intact to a degree. I know I shouldn't assign these types of labels necessarily but I don't think I'm asking a lot to wanna have a balance. I've missed out on women who I had immediate great connections with because that inner drive just wasn't there. It makes you behave in more "feminine" ways which is a turn off to most ladies. i remember when i was virile and my confidence would just shibe throug. Any man knows exactly what I'm saying but I appreciate the perspective regardless. It seems the only way I have a somewhat reliable libido is when I go on these long retaining streaks. And I do seem to be more "magnetic" during these times so I know there's an innate connection it's not just in my head. It also seems the quality or type of women that are drawn to me is way different this way. I'm not saying it's right or wrong and maybe I should just accept it but as far as I know you only live once and a guy feels he's more alive when hes in his masculine. Hope that makes sense.

[bax44]

Get your T checked. Replace or take supplements if low. No brainer, really. I need to get mine checked too sex drive is unstable it goes up then suddenly crashes.

Yeah. During my illness(I have a thing called porphyria which isn't fun) I have constantly had hormones checked, rechecked etc. sometimes my T is lower others it's not so bad. I have an endocrinologist who will prescribe me T anytime I want it cuz hes aware of the hell I've been through and he tells me that "you're only young once" etc. a really great dr actually the first I've found after all these years. I might give it a try just to see what happens it's just I'd rather exhaust all options but I will say it's tough sometimes. Some days feel like a real struggle physically and it's like I have to really force myself to do things I used to love. Meditation etc has as I said changed me I've had people close to me remark on how much calmer I am. But.. This may sound bad kn a spiritual site, but I want some of my bravado and mojo back. It's there ion glimpses at times but all it does is make me more aware of how I used to be. Anyways I feel like I'm complaining but I always get great advice here and I don't have a ton of people who understand this stuff I can talk with.

[soaring crane]

For problems with "T", you may well want to explore simple Zhan Zhuang stances. A good fifteen to twenty minutes a day spent standing still with your palms turned toward your groin will work wonders in that realm. Twice a day even better. I guarantee noticeable results after three weeks.

[bax44]

Thx for the suggestion. I actually have the book "the way of energy" and was doing zhan zhuang back in December. I only stuck with it for like a month cuz for some reason I was getting nightmares while doing the practice. For some reason after having meditated for like ten months at that point anytime I'd try a new energy practice I was really really sensitive to them. I never did the one with the groin centered stance I mostly did the regular standing w knees slightly bent followed by "hug the tree". I remember feeling pretty refreshed after each session but stopped like I said cuz of the crazy dreams lol. So it's basically like hugging the tree but lower correct?

[soaring crane]

wel ... ok, I certainly didn't reckon with nightmares, lol. But ok, yes, basically like the metal phase 'tree' stance, where you have the palms turned to the lungs, but lower, palms turned directly to the groin. But -- you have to make some adjustments to your stance:

 

Allow the weight to settle along the outside of the legs and into the outer edges of the feet (which as always, are shoulder-width, parallel, forming a square or rectangle). It'll feel ever so slightly 'bowlegged', but all your toes will still touch the ground effortlessly. This will open the kua/groin very gently, and is one of the keys to the effectiveness of the stance. The dangly bits should have plenty of room and air circulation i.e. no tight underwear, or no underwear at all.

 

The weight will be centered more in the heels, about 60/40 heel/ball distribution, but this occurs through a sinking of the lumbar spine/sacrum and will cause the knees to 'give way' a bit (it looks like you're 'bending slightly at the knees', like it says in all the books, but that's only the outward appearance. The actual correction happens in the pelvis/hips and is more internal).

 

When you have this down, then it's time to pull up Huiyin/perinium. For a man, I think the easiset technique is applying the muscles you need to pull the scrotum upwards (you know you can make it move up and down, it feels similar to wiggling the ears). Do this also very, very gently, hardly any tension at all. It's better to err on the side of too little than too much, or even just 'think' about the movement instead of forcing the physical aspect.

 

Ok ... now we're getting there ...

 

Stand erect (except that the lumbar spine is extended and 'settled in' to the pelvis); shoulders hang loosely, underarms open (very important), and the palms turned toward the groin, at a comfortable distance in about the 10 to 20cm range. Hands very realxed, with a little space between all the fingers, as though you have little soap bubbles between them (check your thumbs, make sure they're not stiff and pointing upward).

 

Center your thoughts in the palms/groin, but keep your eyes open, your gaze wide, like a warrior standing on the bullwark, guarding the castle, looking out over the horizon for approaching danger. Feel into that role. Yes, a real man's work, lol. Strong, alert, firm. And just a little horny.

 

I previously wrote 15 to 20 minutes, but really you want to shoot for 20+ minutes twice a day, especially early in the morning. Second session ideally not too close to bedtime or you're going to have trouble sleeping, and maybe bad dreams Always start with some loosening exercises as in The Way of Energy (arm swinging, etc). And finish correctly(!)

 

To close an exercise like this:

 

Lay the hands atop one another on your low belly/pubic region. Close the eyes and be still for a minute or two. Soften the face. Move the hands from the belly to over the closed eyes. Hold a minute or two. Open the eyes behind the hands. Pull the hands slowly apart, allowing the light to enter gradually. Make note of the colors, light, shadow, depth, height ... like looking at the world for the first time, with new vitality and no fear.

 

Then a self-massage routine to really solidify the Qi in your body, but I'm done writing for the nonce haha

[Unseen_Abilities]

Clench the perineum muscles every day - works a treat.

[i am]

I wan't responding to you with that post, but mike. He's the one, if you'll recall, who posted about his "spiritual" "problem" of not being able to rub his boner against women in nightclubs.

 

Unfortunately, I think that's the lens I'll be seeing most of his posts through for a while...I'll try my best to see beyond my own biases but I'll admit that my interpretation of his posts will be colored by that.

 

I think what you're seeking is perfectly normal and not in conflict with a spiritual life.

[i am]

The Way of Energy is a good book, in my opinion.

[Michael Sternbach]

Generally, I find it strange how some people seem to see sexuality as contradictory to spirituality. Some clerics will agree. But (Western or Eastern) alchemists, tantra yoga practitioners, Wilhelm Reich, Jane Robert's Seth, and I see this differently.

Edited September 29, 2014 by Michael Sternbach

[i am]

It depends on where you're at and what you want to accomplish. We've been down this road and like everything around here it tends to end in an argument.

 

I don't know much, but I think that "healthy" (probably defined differently to different people) sexuality is probably beneficial to some people's practice and progress. It seems to me, and I've been taught, that at some point you need to move beyond it. It is, after all, a sensual thing and we want to transcend those things eventually, right?

 

So some people think that casual sex and using energy and spells to trick women into sleeping with you is a spiritual pursuit. Some go too far the other way and think any sex or sexual feelings are dirty and bad. The answer of course is somewhere in between, and probably truly different for different people.

 

But I'm definitely coming to believe that the final stages require saving sexual essence and giving up worldly desire.

 

If you're just looking to be spiritual and live a healthy life filled with love, sex is great.