What would you tell your 20 year old self?

[qvrmy11vz]

I've been reading this forum for the last 6 or so months, really enjoy the stuff that gets discussed here. I'm turning 20 next month and currently going through exciting changes, and I think it would be beneficial hearing some views from you people.

 

Grown up in the city (bar the one year I lived in the country) and I currently work long hours at a restaurant. I work a lot of hours, so I'm making quite a lot of cash (more so than my peers that is). Lately, and especially from my current readings, I've been pondering a nomadic life.

 

Anyway, this is more about what YOU would do as a 20 year old, knowing what you know now.

 

As a side note, what forms of exercise would you start doing? (Tai Chi, Qi Gong, martial arts)

 

[soaring crane]

"Do NOT re-enlist!"

[woodcarver]

Don't burn out

[sillybearhappyhoneyeater]

keep going!

[joeblast]

if you actually want to get anything done or accomplished, dont bother with relationships

[dawei]

Anyway, this is more about what YOU would do as a 20 year old, knowing what you know now.

 

I would travel to the other side of the world... as that was my destiny later, I would of liked to see how I absorbed it all earlier in life.

 

Whatever shape or size you think exists... is but a figment of our imagination... it is all so much bigger than we'll ever think.

 

As a side note, what forms of exercise would you start doing? (Tai Chi, Qi Gong, martial arts)

 

Realize that 'practice is not natural' on a certain level. It should come from an inner drive or desire or destiny that this is where your heading. If your just interested and want to try things out, then you are just exploring life.

 

I think there is [rightly so] a fascination with Tai Chi and anyone so moved should explore it... but true mastery and understanding is for the long haul... and most will never really get there... but if you can appreciate what it offers you, then try it.

 

Qigong... results and experience is generally faster and in our faster paced life this might be more appealing... it also lends itself to deeper energy work and practices as it is the foundation.

 

But this can be harder to find proper teaching or even a class... if you're lucky enough to have something available, then you should definitely try it... it is akin to traveling to the other side of the world

[Chang]

"Do NOT re-enlist!"

 

I did not know that you had "made the error double" S.C.

 

This is an interesting question which is somewhat akin to "if you had your life again what would you do differently?"

 

Well the fact is that you cannot go back and do things differently; if you could give your twenty year old self advice from the standpoint of your present state of maturity - you would be unlikely to heed that advice. If you could go back in time and do things differently you would simply make different regretable mistakes. This sorry state of affairs is called life.

[C T]

W

 

I did not know that you had "made the error double" S.C.

 

This is an interesting question which is somewhat akin to "if you had your life again what would you do differently?"

 

Well the fact is that you cannot go back and do things differently; if you could give your twenty year old self advice from the standpoint of your present state of maturity - you would be unlikely to heed that advice. If you could go back in time and do things differently you would simply make different regretable mistakes. This sorry state of affairs is called life.

I think such reflections can be useful for parents with teenage kids, don't you agree? In this sense, its not completely without merit.

[Chang]

W

 

I think such reflections can be useful for parents with teenage kids, don't you agree? In this sense, its not completely without merit.

 

Yes. Unfortunately we have exactly the same problem when we are dealing with and advising our children. We are at a different stage of maturity and they will not see things as we see them. Its almost like being on a different wavelength.

[kudos100]

Listen to what your body and mind are telling you. It is amazing the ability we have to ignore the signs that there is a problem.

 

ALWAYS get a second opinion when it comes to health.

 

There is no such thing as a quick fix. Learn to accept this and be wary of anything that suggests otherwise.

 

Fuck what society, your parents, your peers or anyone else tells you should do with your life. Don't follow the herd and take time to find out who you are and what you are really about.

 

Learn to meditate.

 

Your health is the greatest thing you will own. Take care of it, as you will miss it when it is gone.

Edited October 13, 2014 by kudos100

[Brian]

I wouldn't bother because my 20-year-old self wouldn't listen.

[soaring crane]

I did not know that you had "made the error double" S.C.

 

Oh, I didn't (perhaps because future me contacted young me and spoke some sense?) but it was a very close call. I had planned on it, and then some things happened in Colorado that convinced me to get the hell out while I could. If I hadn't been planning all along to re-up, I could have spent a lot more time preparing for the life afterwards. As it turned out, my new wife and I jumped into icy cold waters of reality fully unprepared.

 

Something else to tell 20-year me: Get it writing!

[Aetherous]

Everything happens for a reason and has its way of working out later on, so don't become discouraged by obstacles or failures...to have these things means that your character is being forged, and they will happen regardless of anything. Try your absolute best in every endeavor, even if you don't need to, and even if it won't make a difference, and always be planning your next steps...aka, set goals constantly. You can't get what you want if you don't know clearly what that is. Who you are and what you do with yourself is more important than what you can get out of life...the meaning you derive from how you live will last much longer than an expensive car for instance. Don't neglect moderate fitness, and sensible nutrition...looking good gives you a big leg up in this world. Be tenacious and persevere.

Edited October 13, 2014 by Aetherous

[joeblast]

Interesting, joeblast, that you choose this one sentiment. Even though I had a couple of LTRs with ultimately incompatible partners, it seems that I would want to tell my younger self something more fundamental. But I'm not sure what. As, even if I did tell my 20 y.o. self something, where my mind was at, I might still have brushed off my own recommendation! lol

 

As a late teenager, I felt the call of the deep universe. But didn't know what that was all about. So I tried my darndest to sidestep it. Now, I can say, "Rainbowvein, trust that calling. Find your way back to the Source your own way. You do not need to follow any others. Chart your own journey. And if you feel the strong call to live out of the city, do it."

 

Just gotta chuckle sometimes when you reminisce.

Well, if I had to go back and identify the most colossal wastes of time in my life...

Whether that speaks more to me, or the warped personalities that pursued me, may be debatable

Maybe a more simple "dont compromise yourself for the appearance of well being in certain others" would be more apropos

[soaring crane]

Well, if I had to go back and identify the most colossal wastes of time in my life...

 

mine seem to have all involved hot rods

[Flolfolil]

...

Edited March 5, 2015 by Flolfolil

[silent thunder]

If you love it, if it feeds your soul, never give up on it... if not, don't worry about it, don't obsess on it, just let it be.

 

If you are betrayed or hurt, don't waste your time fighting for revenge or justice and don't isolate and cut yourself off. Your energy is much better spent on healing and connecting where you have love.

 

cultivate three things above all others.

kind heart

quiet heart

sincere heart

[BaguaKicksAss]

There's this awesome thing, it's called Bagua, start now so you don't have to stumble through it starting at 40. Here's a list of good teachers and ones to avoid and which years you can find them teaching. For magic, your current teacher will try to curse you, get a link object. Oh and here's the email of the one with a legit path you will meet 15 years from now. Aside from that, life is going to rock overall, don't worry about the crappy bits, they will end up being some pretty amazing learning experiences. PS invest in gold, it's going to go up way faster than regular inflation in the next 25 years . Don't invest in US $$, they are going to crash for a bit lol!

Edited October 13, 2014 by BaguaKicksAss

[Infinity]

Interesting question.

 

Many years ago I was a troubled young man who could not reconcile parts of himself due to strong judgements about life which stopped me being and expressing the sides I judged wrong.

 

Anyway I was trying to resolve my psychological limitations and decided to give past life therapy ago. I decided to do a course which would enable me to learn the method and be regressed at a few times too, the course was with Denise Linn.

 

The method consisted of calling on higher energy spirit guides, visualisations and a guided script and in one I went to see a younger self to heal the past or something.

 

Anyway I went back and there I was not as clear as day but I could sense I was there in the playground at school at about aged maybe 8. I went up to myself and did not know what to say, so I enquired are you ok. My younger self said 'yes', but I was so moved with complete sadness and began to sob and sob tears from somewhere very very deep inside myself as I knew he was lying. I had never been ok and no one ever had the time to stop the world and really ask me if I was ok I just said I was because no one really cared. I felt as though I released a big burden that day and learnt something too.

 

If I could go back now and maybe I will have ago later :-) I would give myself some love and acceptance, no advice needed. :-)

 

If I love enough that is what I will express and that is what I will get back.

 

Beyond the little 'i' mind who knows what is possible. Past, present, future maybe they are all one. Who knows I am not sure.

 

There are books / techniques on seeing your future self too.

 

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Future-Yours-Introducing-Progression-technique/dp/0749939842/ref=asap_B0034PZJCM_1_4?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1413227226&sr=1-4

 

Who knows?

 

∞

Edited October 13, 2014 by Infinity

[BaguaKicksAss]

Hmmm, perhaps hand myself a few floppy discs full of info, no wait, they at least CD roms by then...

[thelerner]

What would I tell my 20 year old self?

 

Nothing. It wouldn't change him and it'd sound like a book of cliche's anyway. Instead we'd just hang out, back in the early 80's.

[Nungali]

Dont do anything different from what you are going to do ! ...

 

Change one thing and all the rest could end up somewhere else . You will do fine.

 

And stop worrying ... you will finally get to have sex towards the end of this year.

[GrandmasterP]

Vicar: " If any amongst ye knoweth any just cause or impediment that this couple may not be joined together in Holy Matrimony ye are to speak now or forever hold your peace."

 

GMP ( aged 20): "Yeah I do. byeeee."

 

If only!

 

Edited October 13, 2014 by GrandmasterP

[liminal_luke]

Oh to ask this question! I'd like to ask the bums over 70 or so what they'd advise their 48 year old selves. Darn it though, but somehow that inquiry doesn't have the same ring of rightness to it as your OP. Then again, perhaps it's just my ageism (or the late middle age blues) that makes me think my desire for life-advice less valid.

 

Much of the advice I'd give my 20 year old self would serve me just as well today. Trouble is, I'm not so sure I'm any more willing to take it now than I was then. Well, maybe a little more willing.

 

I dunno. What advice would you give your 10 year old self? Your 15 year old self? Maybe you've gained more wisdom in the last five or ten years than you think. And how much of that advice would still apply?

 

Liminal

[qvrmy11vz]

As a late teenager, I felt the call of the deep universe. But didn't know what that was all about.

 

What is the call of the deep universe, to you?

 

I think there is [rightly so] a fascination with Tai Chi and anyone so moved should explore it... but true mastery and understanding is for the long haul... and most will never really get there... but if you can appreciate what it offers you, then try it.

 

Thanks. I live in a main city, so I think I will take a stab at Tai Chi. I've prepared my time so I can invest in doing it consistently, with hopes of cementing a habit.

 

 

Everything happens for a reason and has its way of working out later on, so don't become discouraged by obstacles or failures...to have these things means that your character is being forged, and they will happen regardless of anything. Try your absolute best in every endevor, even if you don't need to, and even if it won't make a difference, and always be planning your next steps...aka, set goals constantly. You can't get what you want if you don't know clearly what that is. Who you are and what you do with yourself is more important than what you can get out of life...the meaning you derive from how you live will last much longer than an expensive car for instance. Don't neglect moderate fitness, and sensible nutrition...looking good gives you a big leg up in this world. Be tenacious and persevere.

One of the other main reasons I decided to post was to get advised on exercise, diet and other enriching activities which would be good to pursue as a young human. I've eaten a vegan diet for nearly two years now. From the book I'm currently reading, Cultivating Ch'i: A Samurai Physician's Teachings on the Way of Health by Kaibara Ekiken, I've concluded that it would be beneficial to see a doctor of Eastern medicine to get advice on ways of improving and refining my diet.

 

Some of the things I plan on investing time in the next year or 3 are studying Wittgenstein, Nietzsche, Kieekergaard, Diogenes, Heraclitus, Eastern philosophies, Jung, classical art/art history, literature, martial arts on top of regular exercise, learning Chinese and classical piano.

 

I am not without goals nor do I think I'm overloading myself - everything mentioned are things that I am already interested in, and I expect to add or remove some of those things... Wouldn't want to set myself up for disappointment

 

______

 

Thank you all for your replies, I've read every one and have taken something from it.