Amish Wood Milk

[manitou]

How Off Topic can one get?

 

Okay, so I walked by the As Seen On TV rack one too many times. I actually bought this stuff. I know there are others here that are eyeing that product too. So here's a heads up.

 

I can't imagine what this stuff is made of. Possibly just water with a tiny bit of soap in it. It absolutely does not remove old wax. It absolutely has no smell (I'll go back to the nice, clean Pledge smell!)

 

I'd like to find the Amish man that came up with this scam and go cut his beard off. Plenty of 'em around here to choose from, lol.

[Chang]

And yet it sounds so good.

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qIEEhzwaGKM

[manitou]

Oh I know! I've been watching that stupid commercial for months, just knowing it was a scam. Now isn't that a testament to the power of advertising? I finally just broke down.

[manitou]

Not only does it do nothing to give any sort of a shine, but I couldn't even get any of that old furniture polish to make that nice black spot on my rag, like in the commercial. I was really looking forward to the black spot, that's what hurts the most.

[manitou]

Actually I don't really need anything for my wooden items. I fell prey to idiot advertising, that's all.

If there is any saving grace for my actions, then I could possibly hide behind the fact that I'd love to find a 'treatment' for my husband's dremeled furniture - he will dremel the entire wood surface off around a stenciled design, leaving the design in relief. Real Appalachian stuff. There was a sane part of my brain that thought maybe it would somehow be good on Joe's pieces, which are not conducive to Pledge, etc - because of their uneven and pitted surfaces. Maybe the Murphy Oil Soap would be beneficial for that? But if there's a soap component to the Murphy Oil Soap, that may not work so well either.

[GrandmasterP]

Have you tried olive oil on a soft cloth?

That's all I use to clean my trusty briar pipes and they get filthy.

You only need a drop.

Edited October 28, 2014 by GrandmasterP

[manitou]

Have you tried olive oil on a soft cloth?

That's all I use to clean my trusty briar pipes and they get filthy.

You only need a drop.

No, but it sounds like what I'm looking for. The only problem is that they've been sealed and resealed and I never know if the oil thing is a good idea or not. But I think I'll try it and see if it won't revive a bit.

 

 

As an aside on this As Seen On TV thread, don't buy the light little pocket hose. I got taken in on that one too. The commercial shows it shrinking back to its original size, which it will most likely do if on a wood surface, like the commercial - but not on grass.

[Nungali]

Manitou! These are what YOU ARE looking for ... you NEED these !

 

[manitou]

I already have the 16-ton Hydraulic Nail Unbender, but I paid $179.00 for it! Damn! I think I got took...

[thelerner]

I'm a guy, I needs my gadgets.

 

Gadget, gadgets,

tools & gadgets

thingamawobs and duudads,

need'em need'em you will too.

but wait.. there's more.

[Nungali]

I'm a guy, I needs my gadgets.

 

Gadget, gadgets,

tools & gadgets

thingamawobs and duudads,

need'em need'em you will too.

but wait.. there's more.

 

There certainly is! here ya go

 

 

[Andrei]

[manitou]

Thanks for that, Andrei. I was going to order the Poo-Pourri Before-You-Go Toilet Spray, but then when the guy said it smelled like a lemon took a dump I cancelled the order. Good thing I watched it all the way through -

 

Nungali - that 8-Function Electronic Multi-Tool is pretty tempting. Corn holder as well? Wow.