how to give up on life without giving up on life?

[woodcarver]

Does anybody have any suggestions? If you can catch the tone of voice in the topic it seems there's a fine line between the two. I've been in a very low state for months and I don't know what to do. But there's nothing to do right? Just leave it to the tao?

[Silent Answers]

You're not alone. The winter months don't help, either. Try to get out more on the nice days.. Experience as much of life "outside the system" as possible. Find something to pour yourself into that in someway compliments or tests your beliefs.

 

Is there something in particular on your mind or is it the usual "What is the point!? Why do I have to keep doing this?!" feeling.

[nestentrie]

I'd give up cheese.

[Marblehead]

I'll break it down into two sections in order to reply with my honest thoughts.

 

First, giving up on life: What we need give up is as many of our desires as possible. That means not trying to have everything we see advertised on TV or everything our friends have. It means to give up a bit of our ego. We, individually, aren't really all that important to the universe. I'm sure it will continue to do its thing with or without us.

 

Second, without giving up on life: Realize that we are a part of the Tao; a part of the totality. We were allowed birth; given life. What we do with it is up to us. We should test our capabilities and capacities. Find those things that afford us peace and contentment and even joy and happiness. We will never know if we don't try.

[Jetsun]

Good question!

 

Trying to make surrender happen won't help, I guess all there is for us to do is to be with and accept whatever is happening, let everything be as it is including our own struggle and confusion with life.

[Brian]

Chop wood, carry water.

[Ish]

Does anybody have any suggestions? If you can catch the tone of voice in the topic it seems there's a fine line between the two. I've been in a very low state for months and I don't know what to do. But there's nothing to do right? Just leave it to the tao?

 

There can be a lot to do before one is ready to leave it to the Tao!

 

 

I think it can help if you try to see yourself clearly. Then you can know what you can do for yourself.

[dust]

But there's nothing to do right? Just leave it to the tao?

 

I'm not sure that "leave it to the Tao" means anything.

 

In my view, Tao isn't some kind of karmic reinforcer, making sure everything balances out for each person. There is a general balance of forces/energy in the universe, but does that necessarily mean that each person will share equal amounts of good times and bad times from life's beginning to end, just because?

 

We have to push a little bit. In order to find balance, to be contented, we've got to unlearn a lot of bullshit, and often get away from certain places, people, and situations.

 

Some might say "You can find happiness anywhere, just readjust your thinking" or "Running away from life won't help", but -- to get extreme for a moment -- I guarantee that there was no contented, well-adjusted person in a Nazi concentration camp, and there are no contented, well-adjusted Syrian refugees in places like Za'atari.

 

You're not in such an extreme situation (I hope!) but that doesn't necessarily mean that just leaving life to fate will improve things. Sometimes a change is necessary.

 

 

湍而群之不可長保也 Working against the tide cannot last long

[...]

功述身退天之道也 When the work is done, withdraw; the Way of Heaven

 

 

Sometimes going with the flow / being like water means doing what you feel, making a change, not fighting an uphill battle against your emotions.

[hagar]

Does anybody have any suggestions? If you can catch the tone of voice in the topic it seems there's a fine line between the two. I've been in a very low state for months and I don't know what to do. But there's nothing to do right? Just leave it to the tao?

 

From the tone of your question you seem to still have a flicker of hope that "you" can do something about this.

"you" cannot do it. The part that gives up is not the part that is real. However, to really give up you need to grieve.

[Daeluin]

Giving up the ego is not giving up on life. As my ego dissolves I find myself returning to innocence, open, humble, everything I face is full of life and so am I. The goal isn't to give up this richness of life - it is to enter completely into it, and to maintain it with equanimity, ever retaining finding balance amidst the ups and downs. At least, this is my perspective.

[Daeluin]

And yes, the richer life becomes, the more sensitive one is - sensitive to more refined energies and all their harmonies and clashes, and the more difficult it is to face the world with equanimity. But I do not believe hiding from the world is the answer - perhaps hiding within the world, at the very heart....

[Marblehead]

... perhaps hiding within the world, at the very heart....

I like that!

[IntuitiveWanderer]

Does anybody have any suggestions? If you can catch the tone of voice in the topic it seems there's a fine line between the two. I've been in a very low state for months and I don't know what to do. But there's nothing to do right? Just leave it to the tao?

 

Without trying...

 

Who gives up on what? maybe a butterfly was crushed 10.000 years ago by the buttcheek of a primitive man and the chain reaction will ultimately result in a jet plane falling on my house and killing me while I am on the toilet reading the weather forecast.

Edited December 15, 2014 by IntuitiveWanderer

[liminal_luke]

I say don´t bother with giving up on life at all. Don´t use any kind of philosophy, even a nifty sounding Taoist one, to justify collapsing into a depressive funk. There might be a time for quietly sitting by the rinverbank, accepting that everything is perfect just as it is, feeling your ego dissolve into the non-dual nature of ultimate reality. Blah, blah, blah. Now is not that time.

 

Now is the time to take action in the world. Find your passion. Work to acomplish your dreams. Socialize. Study. Eat good food you make yourself. Move. Do some chi gung or practice a martial art. For now, the riverbank can wait.

 

Liminal

[johndoe2012]

45 mins of walk everyday outside while there is natural light makes a huge difference to me.

 

As for philosophy, drop it and listen to your what your body is saying. The next step for everyone is individual and is not stated in books or teachings.

[thelerner]

Be in the world, but not of it. Which I understand as don't take things too seriously. (a female cardinal and bright blue jay just landed in the the bushes a few feet from me)

 

A sense of humor isn't just about 'funny'. Its also about being able to take a step back and look at the absurdities and sweetness of the world and appreciate them. Cultivate and don't lose it.

[Aetherous]

I've been in a very low state for months and I don't know what to do. But there's nothing to do right?

 

Nah there is always something to do. There are always things that we don't like in the world, therefore there's always a desire for something better. Because there's a desire, there is the beginning of formulating a goal. With creating a goal, there is the action of writing it down and thinking about it, and there's also the (more important) action of taking real steps toward actualizing it.

 

Even your post included all of this. You have been feeling low, so you had a desire to feel better, and you thought of what to do about it, and therefore you asked the forum. You did something.

 

So to gain clarity, it can help to write down all of the things that suck in your life. Then it can help to write down all of the ways that things would ideally be for you and for the world. Then write down all of the steps you will take toward making things how they should be. That's a lot of work to do. Then the second half of the work is to actually take those steps.

 

The Daoist concept of wu wei does NOT mean taking no action and being lazy, or letting things happen to you. It means taking no unnecessary action...wu wei means just doing what needs to be done. It does not mean shirking your duties or sensible actions, believing that things will take care of themselves without your help.

 

Furthermore: feeling "low" is a yin state of being. To be proactive and take control of your life is yang. Doing this should make you feel better. It's best to balance the two of course...if you become too controlling and active, then you might be burning yourself out. But as of now, I think you're overly yin and could do with some action. For this very reason, the suggestion by Chris to walk for 45 minutes in the sun is excellent, and will truly help you.

[soaring crane]

“This is a test to see if your mission in this life is complete: if you are alive, it isn't.”

 

From Illusions, by Richard Bach (of Jonathan Livingston Seagull fame), one of my all-time favorite quotable books.

 

A list of quotes from the book:

 

http://www.goodreads.com/work/quotes/30365-illusions-the-adventures-of-a-reluctant-messiah

 

Maybe you'll find something in there that rings with you.

 

Read a good book :-)

 

(edit to point out there are three pages of quotes at that link)

[Chang]

Moderation Message

Such material is in no way for inclusion on this site. IntuitiveWanderer is banned for two days whilst further action is considered by the Mod team

 

Added by Admin: A video was removed as part of the thread removal.

[Marblehead]

I'm glad I wasn't home when that happened.

[Aaron]

Depending on how low you're feeling, you might need to see a professional. Remember religion and philosophy are fine, but there is no reason to avoid the advantages of scientific discovery in helping you feel better, that includes psychology. I've seen a few in my time and they have always been helpful. I also talk to my friends about how I'm feeling, because I know for me isolation is a big part of depression. If I'm actively engaging others and being a part of the community, then it really helps alleviate some of that sense of loneliness. I hope you feel better. If it gets too much, remember to reach out and ask for help before you harm yourself. There are people that care about you, let them help you.

 

Aaron

[woodcarver]

I'm actually feeling a lot better thanks to a lot of the input from all of you. I really appreciate the support for this odd loser

I also found the perfect beat, ending my quest...

 

[dust]

Bam's a living legend. I mean, his influence on the beginning of hip-hop has helped shape modern Western culture. No lie.

 

But he oversold that beat

[woodcarver]

Bam's a living legend. I mean, his influence on the beginning of hip-hop has helped shape modern Western culture. No lie.

 

But he oversold that beat

Money, fame, and power.

 

I appreciate his work coming from the electronic world because the music is alive and changes a lot. For the love of god I need music that changes!

[Marblehead]

I appreciate his work coming from the electronic world because the music is alive and changes a lot. For the love of god I need music that changes!

And here I sit, totally content, listening to (Soul) music from the early 1960s that changed in the late 1960s but I remained with what was good for me. At the moment I am listening to Ben E. King singing "Stand By Me".

 

Yes, music changes with the times. I stopped changing my music in the mid-1970s. There is nothing written that I pay any attention to that states that I must follow the herd.