3bob Posted December 30, 2014 I think this great Buddhist sutta on the "poison arrow" could also be well used with blame being inserted below instead of the arrow - and how we sometimes go through motions similar to those described in trying to pin down blame(s) on someone. (ouch)  Quoted: Cula-Malunkyovada Sutta: The Shorter Instructions to Malunkya" (MN 63), Majjhima Nikaya  "It's just as if a man were wounded with an arrow thickly smeared with poison. His friends & companions, kinsmen & relatives would provide him with a surgeon, and the man would say, 'I won't have this arrow removed until I know whether the man who wounded me was a noble warrior, a priest, a merchant, or a worker.' He would say, 'I won't have this arrow removed until I know the given name & clan name of the man who wounded me... until I know whether he was tall, medium, or short... until I know whether he was dark, ruddy-brown, or golden-colored... until I know his home village, town, or city... until I know whether the bow with which I was wounded was a long bow or a crossbow... until I know whether the bowstring with which I was wounded was fiber, bamboo threads, sinew, hemp, or bark... until I know whether the shaft with which I was wounded was wild or cultivated... until I know whether the feathers of the shaft with which I was wounded were those of a vulture, a stork, a hawk, a peacock, or another bird... until I know whether the shaft with which I was wounded was bound with the sinew of an ox, a water buffalo, a langur, or a monkey.' He would say, 'I won't have this arrow removed until I know whether the shaft with which I was wounded was that of a common arrow, a curved arrow, a barbed, a calf-toothed, or an oleander arrow.' The man would die and those things would still remain unknown to him"  2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Marblehead Posted December 30, 2014 Too late for blame when we have been given a gift of a poisoned arrow. Â Actually, he should blame himself for being a target for the arrow. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
soaring crane Posted December 30, 2014 hmmm... good stuff. Thanks, Bob :-)  I unfortunately have a few people in my family (in-laws) who always play the blame game. Any time there's any kind of discord or disagreement, something gone kaputt, their first concern is always deflecting the blame to someone else. It's really impossible to discuss things with them and I hate it. I really hate it  However, I'm good at sidestepping these things and deflecting the deflections. We have a saying here in Oberfanken: "Du hast dei Recht und ich hab mei Ruh". Translation: "You have your puffed-up sanctimonious satisfaction, and I have my peace of mind". Or, in the short form: "You're right and I'm happy"  Been married to the same woman almost thirty years now. That's the secret 4 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Marblehead Posted December 30, 2014 (edited) That was fun seeing German in print once again. I had trouble with "Ruh" but as soon as I read your translation I said (to myself), "Of course." Edited December 30, 2014 by Marblehead 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
soaring crane Posted December 30, 2014 That was fun seeing German in print once again. I had trouble with "Ruh" but as soon as I read your translation I said (to myself), "Of course." Â that wasn't German. It was Fraconian dialect. Â In German it would be "Du hast dein Recht und ich habe meine Ruhe" Â "Du hast Recht" translates directly to "You have right" but in real English, we say, "You are right". Â "Ich habe meine Ruhe" translates directly to "I have my quiet/peace" Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Chang Posted December 30, 2014 When people talk of blame and point the finger I am always reminded of the following zen tale:- Â A beautiful girl in the village was pregnant. Her angry parents demanded to know who was the father. At first resistant to confess, the anxious and embarrassed girl finally pointed to Hakuin, the Zen master whom everyone previously revered for living such a pure life. When the outraged parents confronted Hakuin with their daughter's accusation, he simply replied "Is that so?" Â When the child was born, the parents brought it to the Hakuin, who now was viewed as a pariah by the whole village. They demanded that he take care of the child since it was his responsibility. "Is that so?" Hakuin said calmly as he accepted the child. Â For many months he took very good care of the child until the daughter could no longer withstand the lie she had told. She confessed that the real father was a young man in the village whom she had tried to protect. The parents immediately went to Hakuin to see if he would return the baby. With profuse apologies they explained what had happened. "Is that so?" Hakuin said as he handed them the child. 3 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
soaring crane Posted December 30, 2014 huh. Had me going for a while there but it was kind of a letdown in the end. Nobody got stabbed? 2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
3bob Posted December 31, 2014 (edited) I liked what to me were the workable reflections and positions given as, "is that so?" and "You're right and I'm happy". Thanks for those...  I believe a much more difficult reflection and position to take in relation to also dealing with blame is given in the following quote, (which btw is along the lines of "love thine enemy" an enemy who may often include blaming others)  Meditation in Affliction, Gyalwa Longchenpa  "Assailed by afflictions, we discover DharmaAnd find the way to liberation. Thank you, evil forces! When sorrows invade the mind, we discover DharmaAnd find lasting happiness. Thank you, sorrows! Through harm caused by spirits we discover DharmaAnd find fearlessness. Thank you, ghosts and demons! Through people's hate we discover DharmaAnd find benefits and happiness. Thank you, those who hate us! Through cruel adversity, we discover DharmaAnd find the unchanging way. Thank you, adversity! Through being impelled to by others, we discover DharmaAnd find the essential meaning. Thank you, all who drive us on! We dedicate our merit to you all, to repay your kindness" Edited December 31, 2014 by 3bob Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Marblehead Posted December 31, 2014 that wasn't German. It was Fraconian dialect. Â In German it would be "Du hast dein Recht und ich habe meine Ruhe" Â "Du hast Recht" translates directly to "You have right" but in real English, we say, "You are right". Â "Ich habe meine Ruhe" translates directly to "I have my quiet/peace" Okay. Are we going to translate that into Latin nest week? Hehehe. Â There was a time, back in the mid-1960s, when I could read at about fifth grade lever. Â I'm back to working on my English now. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Marblehead Posted December 31, 2014 (which btw is along the lines of "love thine enemy" an enemy who may often include blaming others) I can't do that 3bob. But I do like to know who my enemies are. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
3bob Posted December 31, 2014 (edited) I can't do that 3bob. But I do like to know who my enemies are. Â if we know who our enemies are, and then why they are, and then how they are, and then what they are, then we are half way to being able to put transformation into practice, otherwise we as individuals and as mankind will always have "enemies" popping out of the woodwork and in effect never get off first base with teachings like the T.T.C., etc. Â And as many of us well know, "we have met the enemy and he is us" Edited December 31, 2014 by 3bob Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Marblehead Posted December 31, 2014 if we know who our enemies are, and then why they are, and then how they are, and then what they are, then we are half way to being able to put transformation into practice, otherwise we as individuals and as mankind will always have "enemies" popping out of the woodwork and in effect never get off first base with teachings like the T.T.C., etc. But why should I have to do all the work? Â And as many of us well know, "we have met the enemy and he is us" I can honestly say that I am no longer my own enemy. Â But I do disagree with me sometimes. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
3bob Posted December 31, 2014 why did various Sages leave various nuts and bolts legacies and also write books for us to reflect upon? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Marblehead Posted December 31, 2014 Because they care about us. (Even if they are impartial.) Â Or maybe they needed to earn some money from the sales. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
3bob Posted December 31, 2014 or maybe both in varying degrees. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
3bob Posted January 1, 2015 btw, to blame the blamer for the blame is just more fancy footwork, thus how would one take off such shoes? (examples anyone?) Share this post Link to post Share on other sites