Zen teacher sugested psychoteraphy after seeing dramatic kryias

[Kubba]

Well, I would say that one need to be carrefull even among buddhists!

 

Somehow it happened to me that after some period of intensive practice I started to experience very dramatic body movements, spasms, different sound emmission, very loud laughting (meaning veryveryvery). I did not know wher it came from, I did not ask for it nor I even tried to let it happend. 

 

THere is deep understanding of the process when it shows up (kundalini and prana movements), you know where the mantra "om" comes from, you kow how they invented asanas, mudras and sexual tantra, and you know that everything is okay even if your experiences can look strange for people around you.  It can even look as if you were dying, or having some psychodelic episodes.

 

So you are not afraid to much, but these experiences are so unusuall and unpredictable, that I just went to the forest close to the temple where I was practicing to let it burn out.

I spent there one week in order not to bother people nor being bothered, sometimes comming back to the temple to drink some water and sleep some hours until it wake me up and called back to the forest.

 

The last day of these psychodelic like "dancing and singing" the abbot came to my room, before I left to the forest and started to ask stupid questions about whats going on with me.  I tried to hide, but he entered to my room by force. At that moment I could not control myself, so kryia movements and different laughting or singing "OM' on different tones and very loud continued in front of him. It was very hard to talk to anyone even if I heard them and could understand.

 

He suggested that he will call the ambulance or some psychological support. Then he brought some other person and did not let me leave my room just making my process more complicated.

 

Then he called the formal teacher of that temple to tell me something about, thinking that I may bend or calm down in face of someone having some power in the school. But the teacher did not know what is it even after my explanations, he just suggested hospitall.

 

It lasted maybe 6 hours with them, sad and includes checking my stuff in order to find drugs and calling my familly in order to sell them a story that I have some serious psychological problems.

 

My opinion is that people in such places, placed in big citties can be not preparred the right way for meditators. They are okay for fancy meditators and selling big words, but when real things come they don't know what to do and panick.

They can confuse normal effects of meditation with psychic problems, and if you are not strong enought and dont understand you can even believe them. Going there in the midst of rising of your energy can be even dangerous for one's health.

 

Someone that has experienced hard kryias can say that controlling them, or even stopping by force can produce some temporary ilness.

While they come and tried to controll me and not let me leave the place alone a tumor grew on my neck under my ear, and I knew the reason of it, but how to explain it to close minded people called themselves zen buddhists? So I just used the right moment and run out of the place into the forest and started to laught so strong that almost loosing conciousness but it was required to relase the body of some tension to be able then to drive the car. They offcourse run behind me, chasing me. What could I do?

THen I had to go to my home and spend 2 more days in forest, to let the turmor vanish.

 

They even told me that there was one woman, that had simillar experiences that I had, and they sent her to the hospital and there, they injected some "medicine" into her body, to let her relax. She achieved some psychological problems after it. Poor girl.

 

How is it possible? I have no idea, I always thought that places called "temples" are "proffesional". I was not prepared for all this.

 

I just say that for people not to believe to much in someones oppinion about your practice, and not be afraid when something literally starts to count your bones one after another. Its too late to run away so just let it happend, give up controll, the gorilla will fuck you, you cant do anything about it.

 

Be also carrefull with listening to advices of people that had spend many years practicing meditation. They often can be more close-minded than an average person that has meditated only for one week. Someones achievements or the sense of achievements is just another bullshit. That abbot had practiced for more than 30 years and had no idea whats going on! I don't mind, but better don't count too much on other people. There is deep understanding inside you  that is better to follow if you don't have a good guru in front of you. People are crazy and can harm you with their ignorance.

Often it is better to pretend that you are stupid and don't know anything.

 

And I just want you to be carrefull with choosing places when going to retreats and so on. it can be crucial thing if you don't want someone chase after you in the forest.

cheers

Edited June 2, 2015 by Kubba

[Silent Answers]

Well, it was silly of you to play your game and expect them to react any differently. There's not a lot of places playing by those rules.

 

You should still respect other people, and maintain an understanding of how your actions will be received. Otherwise, you're just lost in a new game...and before long, in some kind of trouble.

Edited June 2, 2015 by Silent Answers

[Kubba]

youre right, but it was impossible while it happening (or I did not know how to stop). I did not know what's going on, what is the game, it was lakie putting a newborn pappy in front of the aligator,

cause did not have any experiences like that, nor even imagined, nor having any suggestions from my teacher or books what can come.

Could not stop it, just calm it a bit to calm these people too, and calm my body a bit until I get some privacy.

 

Somehow I believed that the abbot knew whats going on, and just pretended in front of the other ones that he didnt, but I overestimated his understanding. I was stupid too and arogant to some degree.

Of what I know, they saw simillar things, and are used to it so they just waited me to leave. I had contact with them through e-mail after these episodes, and they seemed not moved to much, so noone was harmed I guess. I'm just another crazy guy that they can look at from the perspective of their "strong and stable practice".

 

But understanding of how it can affect others came after some troubles with trying to explain....

Edited June 2, 2015 by Kubba

[idiot_stimpy]

Hahaha, the image I had of you running through the forest laughing and the monks chasing you is priceless.

[Silent Answers]

My comment before was assuming that you already had better control of it. I'm glad you removed the guilt from the second post, as that's unnecessary, and wasn't my intention.

 

Like Stimpy says, it's pretty damn funny to an onlooker, but it must be annoying having other spiritual leaders think you're crazy. Especially when this is out of your control.

 

It's such a tricky process around others ...and a slippery slope to really losing your mind. Can you distinguish between the kriyas and your own ego, completely?

 

There is a lesson to be learned from the reactions of others, too. Once you get that, it should also hopefully bring you more control.

 

By the way, which country are you in?

[Henchman21]

interesting storythanks for sharing

[idiot_stimpy]

Sometimes, when you need to vent you just have to. 

 

Re-reading you post has me in fits of laughter. You must have had some wicked energy going on there!!!!

[soaring crane]

It's all a lot of fun until someone gets sued.

[Kubba]

My comment before was assuming that you already had better control of it. I'm glad you removed the guilt from the second post, as that's unnecessary, and wasn't my intention.

Like Stimpy says, it's pretty damn funny to an onlooker, but it must be annoying having other spiritual leaders think you're crazy. Especially when this is out of your control.

It's such a tricky process around others ...and a slippery slope to really losing your mind. Can you distinguish between the kriyas and your own ego, completely?

There is a lesson to be learned from the reactions of others, too. Once you get that, it should also hopefully bring you more control.

By the way, which country are you in?

By the way - can you answer what "mu" means and where it cones from? (I don't mean the history of kongan)

 

The word kryia I found after these things. Before and durring it I did not really know any names of these processes. I did not know any yoga systems.

 

While it going on I just knew what these things are cleaning from the body and how particullar movements and sounds work for cleaning, cause one can simply sense it and understand how everything is related to the proces, but its hard to explain it to someone.

It still lasts I can tell, ego trips still show, but its more related to throath and ceasing the "throath breathing", and all mind things that are rooted into breathing patterns, but am not sure if thats the right terminology.

 

Then you see an angry dog, and then how he twistes his body on the ground and then yaws, and you understand what he just did and why it is happy and relaxed now. Then you see a human being angry and you see the difference and modifications added to the body in order to carry the ego. Shit!!

 

Im not sure about mudras, maybe they clean some gesticulation memory of the ego within body. People , usually move hands and fongers when talki g and acting or having emotions

 

Some days after these processes in the temple I read somewhere this word - kryia and what it describes. When knowing it I could say the difference between ego and this process, I could say, cause when I try to evoke these processes of curiosity they cease.

when some mind things like guilt or pride or anger shows I can work with them, and body, especially facial muscles, breathing patterns, throath tension and eyes movements related to them somehow relaxes. For example after writing that email, or after talking to some member of my familly. I guess the deepest part of ego, that are rooted in the body-mind are activated by parents.

 

Actually it somehow works like that: egotic patterns show, then the cleaning follows, changing the breathing patterns and some tensions show, that came from in body representations of particular ego-pattern and the balancing force. But it does not bother people around me anymore cause It is very soft, cant be notice by others, and when its more drastic I know I just have to leave for some moments.

With time these ego trips are very slight, almost can't be noticed.

Now it's more on throath level and superego. So am not fully ballanced yet in my action.

And talking about it sometimes brings a slight exaltation and then embarasment of this exaltation.

Edited June 3, 2015 by Kubba

[Captain Mar-Vell]

...

 

I feel your pain, man.

 

I was stupid too and arogant to some degree.

 

Me too.

 

...

[idiot_stimpy]

It's all a lot of fun until someone gets sued.

 

The Zen Master probably should have hit him with a big stick.

[soaring crane]

The Zen Master probably should have hit him with a big stick.

 

yes, I was going to add that to my post, lol

[Kubba]

And then the zen master gets sued cause of "hitting people with a big stick".

 

Police agent said that the master's explanation was:

- he gave the wrong answer!

 

The problem is big. Investigation shows that all around the world there are people called masters and they hit people cause they give wrong answers. Evidences show that some of these sticks are giant, and can seriously injure the body and even the brain.

People are afraid to open their mouths.

The goverment did not yet decided what to do with this case. The society is shocked.

Edited June 4, 2015 by Kubba

[idiot_stimpy]

And then the zen master gets sued cause of "hitting people with a big stick".

 

Police agent said that the master's explanation was:

- he gave the wrong answer!

 

The problem is big. Investigation shows that all around the world there are people called masters and they hit people cause they give wrong answers. Evidences show that some of these sticks are giant, and can seriously injure the body and even the brain.

People are afraid to open their mouths.

The goverment did not yet decided what to do with this case. The society is shocked.

 

What if the moment he hit you, you became enlightened? 

[Kubba]

If required, some kind of stick will hit you anyway. Also there is a time for you to hit the master