Lesson's Over! - Today's Public Training Incident

[GreytoWhite]

Earlier in the afternoon I was helping a friend get into the groove of practicing some jibengong so he can get into the xingyi and bagua I've been practicing and promoting here in town. He has a pronounced lordosis of the spine and duck walks. I'm trying to get him to sit into his pelvis and keep his feet straight. We're at the park and at the end of the standing lessons and some lines of metal and wood element we go to a nice tree in a circular patch of grass to work on some circle walking. This sunburnt jackass carrying a yoga mat and a tub of potato salad comes up asking if we were doing"PAW kooah."

 

I just said, "Yes" and went on showing my friend some circle walking. We get a couple of circles around the tree and the new arrival gets up to show me a horrible example of single palm change that he "learned from some guy in DC Chinatown." He then says, "Ty cheeee, xingyi, and PAW Kooah are no good for self defense" and demonstrates a very simplistic five step karate kata I first saw in elementary school. I told him this karate form was, "...somewhat antithetical to what we were doing" and he then sits back a few feet away and "allows" us to continue. Then he interrupts again and says, "Here is a self defense lesson - just get on a line with me."

 

He does one move that's a step back, a combo uppercut and maybe a throw - pretty wide open and useless. Then it's a forward punch with a hip chamber on the other end, a back fist and some other couple of moves. He goes through and explains the application of each move and I'm laughing inside. After two tries seeing him do the first move I could replicate it easily. I then asked, "Why would I ever do that in the first place? Never do that, it's wide open. What would you do were I to..." then I put my right toe softly into his solar plexus without any force behind it. After just leaving it there a good full second (I counted one one thousand in my head) of my toe at the top of his belly he panics, "blocks" downward with the backs of both forearms and fists clenched. I softly said, "Good" and then stepped into his space, off balanced him and chose not to add a punch. He stumbled back a bit and shouted, "Lesson's over!"

 

An orange belt's kata, "some aikidio and ty cheee," and a weekend learning bagua in the park in DC - I keep encountering delusional guys who either got really lucky in the past or have never fought. I've gotten my ass beaten enough to know what a true fighter's movement looks like. One guy is about my age and he claims he got to orange belt and then read a book to "become a master." I almost expect it from the eighteen year old kids but someone my age, and a forty year old man? Christ's cracker, get me some cheese and sacramental wine! Thankfully my friend bought me some brews after practice.

[Nungali]

Well ... the delights of public training !

 

We train in town, by the river in the park, in full view of the main bridge linking north and south sides of town.

 

Oooo you will get all sorts ;

 

Car goes past, guys hang out and scream incomprehensable agro and something about 'Poofters are gay!" ... really ? a self evident statement I would have thought ....  'The Israeli'  waves a kama in the air ( which we were practising with )  and abuses them back . I ask him " What would you do if they came over here ?"

 

" Well, not just laugh, like you are ... I have this." and holds up the Karma

 

"Hmmm ... dont you think if we start slashing up the public with martial arts weapons it might effect our allowance of training in this park by the local police ?"    

 

Another time a guy (total stranger)  stands off to the side and starts doing his own really bad  beginners 'karate kata'   next to our training  ( WTF ?    ) - he was about late 30's - no silly kid there either.

 

One out of it guy is eye balling us and eventually comes over to the teacher  and starts raving and teacher invites him (who obviously has a hangover) to join in ... and why are you drink, are you looking yourself .... blah blah ,,, starts a whole on the spot re-manage your life course ... fuckin hell !  yeah right, the guy is obviously fucked up, lets teach him how to take out an eyeball followed by a neck break    

 

Then there was the old fat guy, that pulled up on a little step through motor scooter, set up a boom box, stripped of to undershorts and started dancing to some Elvis music. 

 

Once, even a guy I knew "he was going on about his KI master teacher, 'Put you on your arse without even touching you ! "     And  then he offers to show me 'deadly inescapable move. he tries to start with a punch, I slapped it away, cracked him on the elbow and did a little flick kick into his groin. he stood there looking horrified "You kicked me in the balls! "

 

"But I didnt hurt you did I ?"

 

"No  ... but I felt it ... < looks confused>  how come I felt it and it didnt hurt ."

 

"because I stopped in time ... I didnt want to hurt you."

 

No no no ... that was too much for him "Thats too full on man ! Thats it for me today "  

 

"Okay, well, you tell your Ki master he can try and fight me with untoucable key,  and I will be going for elbows wrist knees eyes and throat ."

 

" hey man ... why are you getting so heavy"

 

"me ? you were the one that said, out of the blue, that some guy you knew, at your instigation, would come here and put me on my arse ! "

 

   people are funny  

 

 

 

My favourite, doesnt include me, its a story I was told by a guy that was pretty good at Kung Fu ... I asked him how he was lucky enough to find a good teacher. he said he saw this old Chinese guy in a park training and hid in the distance and started trying to copy his moves. Then when he looked up after a while old Chinese dude had disappeared. Then all of a sudden he gets a tap on the back, he was behind him.

 

"Please do not copy without permission, it is rude.  If you want to learn I will teach you properly . "     

Edited July 1, 2015 by Nungali

[Nungali]

Oh I left out the best one .   This was years back.

 

We would get to our nice grassy spot to train and it would be all dug uop and muddy by young hoons that had done wheelies and burnouts on the grass. It became really annoying.

 

Then one day they decided to do it while we were there, they came in off the road at a ridiculous speed, in a stupid badly hotted up car, slid all over the place out of control  ( and also kids on bikes and people walking dogs are about, as well as us ) and came to a big sliding grass tearing stop right near us

 

Me;  "You fuckin idiots! What the hell do you think you are doing?"

 

They take a quick look at me (and nothing else apparently) and all 5 of them decide to jump out the car and go me  

 

then they realise they are in the middel of a bout six guys with staffs, sais, swords ....           classic !  They pannicked and ran back to the car 

 

Me " Dont try to run off Mr WQV 467 , I have you number!"

 

But they did, so later I gave it to the cops, they said 'Good, we have been waiting to catch those guys.'

 

Next week, turn up to the park ... big tear up right through our spot  - bastards!  But then I noticed it was a rather big long one ... that went all the way to the river edge, I walked over and their was that same car upside down in the river ...

 

 

 Beautiful !    

[GreytoWhite]

Great stuff Nungali. Yeah I get a little peeved when people think because I'm short that I can't fight or that I'll just be scared of someone bigger. My first taiji and kung fu teacher was less than 1.5m, I'm only 1.7m tall - the average joe here in AZ is about 1.8m or taller and thinks he's tough because of size and 'Merica fuck yeah! It's fun to show those guys what it's like to be a real scrapper.

 

About six months ago I was hanging out with my brother from another mother that I've known since high school. I'd had some amphetamines as he ran out of coffee and his girlfriend is ADD huzzah prescription speed! Then I topped it off with some rum to make the night interesting and stumbled over to the neighbor's house who was having a party. Smoked a bowl of reefer with one fellow and started chatting. I looked down on the ground and this girl was giving another girl a massage and I was thinking, I'm in the right kinda place. Massager then got up and punched three of the dudes there right in the gut, knocked the wind out of 'em and they all got to bitching and moaning.

 

As I was the new guy and she decided I deserved extra special attention and punched me right in the lower dantian. I yielded and decided not to cotton body her hand into brokenness. I was still standing there intoxicated to the gills just happy as can be and she tried again. Again I chose to be merciful and not fuck her hand up. At this point I was getting rather turned on. The other three guys all turned and looked at me. She then sunk a fist all the way to my iliac crest through my abdomen at some weird angle and that one stung but wasn't too bad. She decided that I was a different level than she was used to and gave up - she was really unused to someone just laughing off her strikes. One of the gents came over and said, "I was in wrestling and boxing in high school and college - what the fuck do you do?" They didn't believe me when I said, "Mainly taiji." LMAO!

 

I am rather liking the changes happening to my body from the xingyi and bagua training. I've gotten a much better idea of how to use the middle dantian and clavicular cradle "kua" now and hope to be able to use it sometime in the near future. Sifu has me working on a buncha stuff that's quite transformative but very painful at times thanks to how fucked up my spine is. I'm sure I'll have a full on scrap here any moment - it's been brewing up around me lately and I've been rather lucky to avoid most of it so far with measured responses and staying out of my friends' idiocy.

[Nungali]

Not being used to getting hit can really go against you in a self defence situation ... thats where boxers can come good. Some I know, dont really get intio form until they are smacked around a bit.

 

other MA s that arent used to that get quiet shocked and offended at a whack , even one that doesnt injure them. One club  I attended said you were not supposed to hurt each other ???

 

I asked for clariifcation "Do you mean 'hurt' or injure' ... a lot of techniques 'hurt' .... my other club has a rule that we should not injure, or leave marks that last more than 3 days or do anything that effects the others ability to gain income, look after their family etc ... but you can hurt people in training ."

 

The instructor looked rather horrified at me .   .....  ( I later realised not everyone taps out because of pain or inability to escape or avoid unconsciousness ... some just tap out if they feel the other has the technique 'on right'  ... which would lead to people getting pissed with me for not 'giving up'     .... then the teacher would come over and do it properly and I would  ' Arrrgh !    tap tap ! '  

[GreytoWhite]

Yeah that patty cake crap a lot of the wing chun guys play gets me heated as does a lot of the taiji tuishou where no one really does anything except hop a little. The worst was the aikido I trained as a kid, I had no one in my class who weighed as much or really fought as regularly so the other kids got upset when I wasn't a "good" uke and refused to throw myself. It's martial arts - I expect to be thrown, made extremely uncomfortable, kicked, and occasionally struck in the face ya know? Otherwise, where is the martial? I don't dance.

[Nungali]

Poor old Aikido ... its so misunderstood ...

 

... by many of the people that teach it ! 

 

I even had one person go to demonstrate a throw on me and got pissed off when I didnt respond right  ! 

 

They said Aikido consists of two parts; one does the technique, the other rolls  (and this is in front of a class I am giving with my students )  .

 

I said; thats not the way I was taught, you throw me, if you can, and I roll to avoid breaking my neck, you allow me to roll to be polite and avoid responsibility for making me a paraplegic ...   I could easily keep hold of your arm or wrist and manipulate you into danger as you roll ... but I wouldnt do that in training or friendlies . .

 

Horrified again .   

 

Same with sword work ... I feel I learnt some good techniques with Aiki sword ( especially years back ) , but still recently when I did it, it seemed very degraded. It lacked a lot of what I had learnt elsewhere (and visa versa )  ..... I easily 'killed' the sword instructor twice  ( he was leaving the area and closing the school, last day, everyone else gone, he goes "Okay, let's see if you can kill me ?" and attacked , I just stepped forward off line at 45 and skewered him one handed, with the tip sideways between the rins right over the heart - stopped in time of course ... with a boken -  he goes  ' Ohhh  .... that would have done it !   ... OK see if you can get me ."

 

I kicked my rubber croc ( a shoe that is ... in case Apech is reading )  off into his face and cut up through both his arms .

 

people dont often train using tactics, environment, etc. 

 

On the other side ... the non Aikido sword guys ... they get really freaked by Kiara Tsuki - cut to the face ....   well, its supposed to be intimidating , but they never use it .... ? 

 

 

Some guys dont like it when you refuse to throw yourself      ... like this guy   (but you can see he is a total dickhead right from the start ) ; 

 

 

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=buYAxrwEcSk

 

 

 

Edited July 3, 2015 by Nungali

[GreytoWhite]

Yeah it's crazy sometimes how this world of martial arts gets. Attracts all kinds and usually not fighters. I didn't choose to be in most of the fights in my childhood around the neighborhood or schoolyard that was just Stockton. Also being beaten by someone much larger (my kempo black belt mother, her various boyfriends, babysitters, and my stepdad) on a regular basis really changes how one responds to being hit and sticks with ya.

 

That's one of the reasons why I train internals - I already know how to fight and I want to do so powerfully without having to be on the weight machines constantly. I told sifu about this today and he laughed and just said, "One of those guys."

[Nungali]

 ... I dont get the beat on people thing .  Especially kids !   I spent a bit of time with young lads,  a lot of fathers seemed absent around here. They all come good ( or at least a little better) with the right energy.   Some need a good 'wrassle' too, again , with the right energy. 

 

One kid here needed a 'good beating', so his father made him climb up the waterfall opposite with him. That's scary ! Apparently they had to sleep on a ledge overnight during a  thunder and lightning storm. The  he made him go fruit picking up north with him. Kid ended up with a car, money and a girl friend (and some self-esteem) when he came back .    

 

I, personally had it pretty good with my parents . so lucky, but had a big brother ... big    brother  .... here is a 'trick' ;  stand on my toes so I cant move my feet and then push me backwards ...   whump! ... then grab my ankles and  ift me up in the air and up and down donking my head on the floor.     ha ha har  ..... yeah, mostly fun ....       

 

So, began the development of my sneaky and innovative methods  of  'doing  nasty shit to the bastards so they will think twice before doing it next time'   and relying on psyche, wit and tactics.   Ohhh , there are a few  stories there !  (Like the one when I slipped a live octopus down the front  his swimming trunks while he was helping to carry a large wooden surf life saving boat on hos shoulders ... flexing in front of all the beach bunnies .   ( Nyuk nyuk  nyuk ! ) 

 

....   yeah ..... he was 'one of these guys' ; 

 

 

[Nungali]

Just for fun ... this is what happens if you dont run up the back ( over the seats, shipped oars , etc )  in time   ;

 

 

[Vanir Thunder Dojo Tan]

been meaning to read this article.... drawn to it...   "Omniversal singularity theory, 'singularities attract'" 


anyways, im glad i did. made my day. totally worth the heat i get to walk in on my way back to the house



in all fairness, i am "that guy" except i know my place      i can totally understand his eagerness to show off, but at the same time, KNOWING im prone to that kind of idiocy, i cant help but laugh at him anyways


Your toe on his solar plexus was genius!

[Nungali]

Had to put this here   

 

 

Lesson in bag snatching is over dude !