Hello, looking for guidance

[gyoko]

Hello all. Mostly joined seeking help with a possible qi gong deviation. I was taught basic dan tien meditation as a part of my training in ba gua chang. My school disbanded, but I continued this meditation for quite a while. Eventually I started experimenting on my own even trying out different forms of meditation, including kundalini.

 

Anyways long story short I started feeling results, warm feelings deriving from the dan tien and moving up my spine, feeling of tranquility, etc. But then It was like I couldn't turn it off. I had like a burning sensation that felt like the sun that radiated through and off of me. Also my breathing was constantly deep and metered like during meditation. Also there were occurrences of these strange jabbing pains in my lower back (kidneys?) sometimes.

 

These pains usually happened when dealing with a negative person I guess, and there always seemed to like electromagnetic issues around these meetings. Like power outages, flickering lights, etc. But interacting with positive people produced a tingling, warm, wonderful feeling in the same place. Probably just synchronicity/delusion. But I prattle on.

 

All this stuff lead me to have a breakdown and now I have been diagnosed as bi-polar. So just looking for help/ counsel on whether or not its all in my head or if my current psychological state is a result of, or if it sounds like I truly am crazy and improper meditation just made it evident.

[Marblehead]

Hello Gyoko, and welcome.

 

Your membership is approved and we're happy you found your way to us. We look forward to accompanying you on some of the way that you still have to go.

 

Please take the time to read the two posts pinned at the top of this Welcome page and take a look at the forum terms and rules. This covers all you need to know when getting started.

 

For the first week you will be restricted to ten posts per day but after that you can post as much as you like. Also, until you’ve posted fifteen times in the forums, you’ll be a “Junior Bum” with somewhat restricted access and will be allowed only two private messages per day.

 

Good luck in your pursuits and best wishes to you,

 

Marblehead and the TDB team

 

 

Hi Gyoko,

 

Yeah, it sounds like you are in need of, at minimum, a good understanding of your condition.

 

I will firstly state that I believe that you should follow the instructions of your professional medical personnel.  None of us here are professionals.  We are just individuals sharing our experiences.

 

Yeah, it sounds like you brought something out of hiding that would have been better remaining hidden.  But now that it is out you have to find ways to deal with it.

 

You can either start your own thread in whatever sub-forum you think appropriate or you can restate your situation in any of the associated threads/sub-forums already active.  Not too many people read these "Welcome" posts so you likely won't get much feedback here.

 

And remember when interacting with others about your condition make sure you question everything.

 

May you enjoy your time here.

 

Marblehead

Edited February 11, 2016 by Marblehead

[RiverSnake]

The sensations your experiencing are the result of chi and developing sensitivity to it. As you continue practicing the sensations will become more pronounced. Choose your company wisely, cleanse with salt baths regularly and keep practicing your Qigong and Meditation, maintaining balance and calm through growth is very important. Welcome to TTB.

[gyoko]

Thanks for the reply. I stopped practicing qigong and meditation fearing I might do more harm than good. Instead, I have just been doing wu wei excercises. But you have given me the courage to continue.

 

As far as the bi-polar diagnosis; I don't really question the diagnosis, but its not like doctors have measured my neurotransmitters any more than they have measured my qi. I guess I was just worried that they were only looking at the issue from a strictly 'body' perspective and neglecting both 'mind' and 'spirit'. So I will most assuredly continue to take my medication, but will now integrate meditation in as well. Of course I'm sure psychoactive medication will hinder meditation to some degree...

[Marblehead]

Yeah, "bi-polar" is a popular diagnosis nowadays.  Yeah, you have mood changes.  From what you said they are caused in most part by how you are receiving energy from others and that effects your energy.  Maybe you are just more sensitive than most?

 

I doubt meditation would ever hurt and likely your meds will facilitate your meditations.

[looking4peace]

Hi Marblehead, it sounds like you may have activated the Kundalini energy.  I would suggest being careful with continuing further meditative practices particularly without a teacher to help you if needed.  I had a Kundalini opening/crisis myself due to Shaktipat earlier in my life and was just practicing Taoist Nei Gung at the time.  Those who have not had a Kundalini awakening may assume it's just a Chi deviation that needs to be balanced out through further practice.  That may be true, but this could have detrimental effects.  There are teachers out there who have worked with many people who have had a Kundalini opening.  Bonnie Greenwell and Tara Springett are 2 that come to mind.

 

I hope this helps and wishing you all the best on your journey.

[Marblehead]

Hi Looking,

 

WoW!  I didn't even know I had any.  I don't practice inner alchemy.  I do on occasion meditate but I use empty-minded form.

 

But thinking on what you have said I think you were actually talking to Gyoko.

 

And what you said would likely be valid for him.

 

Thanks for sharing.

[looking4peace]

Yes, my message was meant for the OP, Gyoko.  Sorry about that.

[gyoko]

Thank you for your insight looking4peace. Sounds like something I should look into. Especially since I was just kind of 'winging it' in regards to Kundalini, while working from at least a basic foundation of nei gung as taught by my sifu. I was also dabbling in Sufic mantra meditation at the time as well.

[Gerard]

Hello all. Mostly joined seeking help with a possible qi gong deviation. I was taught basic dan tien meditation as a part of my training in ba gua chang. My school disbanded, but I continued this meditation for quite a while. Eventually I started experimenting on my own even trying out different forms of meditation, including kundalini.

 

It's unfortunate that you were taught a bogus practice as part of Bagua. Real Bagua is pure circle walking and purification of the mind via stepping, opening of the joints and the eight mother palms. Expect at least 2 decades of continuous pratice around these three foundational elements before moving on to the next level: martial, healing others, etc.

 

You must work with trees in order to purify the 5 elements.

 

Finding a good and caring teacher is a quest itself.

 

All the best.

[gyoko]

"Real Bagua is pure circle walking and purification of the mind via stepping, opening of the joints and the eight mother palms."

 

I only practiced for ten years and that was all I did for the first nine. So is zhhan zhuang frowned upon that early as well? I just find it hard to imagine really understanding what opening your joints really means without a concept of chi flow. But again, I didn't put in twenty years.

[gyoko]

Eugh the more I look into this stuff and all the conflicting information out there. Styles, schools, sects, etc. Let alone other eastern religion/spirituality. Not to mention trying to decipher and use pinyin; since I was introduced to this stuff in wade-giles. I'm thinking I should just go learn joe america homogenized karajukidokwanchijitsu. You know and just focus on straight up, old fashioned, physical fitness.

 

I'll come back to magic once we can scientifically measure it. The only magic I wanna hear about is the kind in a young girls heart.

[Marblehead]

You could always join the Army.  That should help.

[thelerner]

Eugh the more I look into this stuff and all the conflicting information out there. Styles, schools, sects, etc. Let alone other eastern religion/spirituality. Not to mention trying to decipher and use pinyin; since I was introduced to this stuff in wade-giles. I'm thinking I should just go learn joe america homogenized karajukidokwanchijitsu. You know and just focus on straight up, old fashioned, physical fitness.

 

I'll come back to magic once we can scientifically measure it. The only magic I wanna hear about is the kind in a young girls heart.

Sounds smart.  The downside to living in the Information Age is that there's too much information and most of it conflicts and the loudest are often the most critical of everything.  Taking some time out, working on general fitness is good if you've been 'energy' burned.  

 

Later on, there's some good babies out there, and with fresh bath water you'll find one you click with.