quite a insecure complex

[Taoway]

.

Edited March 12, 2016 by bodhidharma

[Aetherous]

It sounds like you're on the right path with therapy. And don't get down on yourself about the Dao...there are times along the way when we have to simply focus on taking care of ourselves, rather than being anything in particular.

[thelerner]

It is a silly phobia.  You'll have to get over it sooner or later.

 

When one doesn't know what to do, it's time to strategize.  Possible strategies:

 

1. Date and live normally, if you're close to having sex ask if they have penis size hang up.

If they do, drop'em.  Find another, but I bet you'll find most woman don't have that hang up.

 

2. Date and live normally, wear your underwear to bed, as many men do, and have sex in the dark. Which most people do.

From the first words, to first touches, there's much more to sex then genitals. 

 

3. There are 1,000 crazy kinks in this world, find one you like, go with it, find your own kind. 

If you're dressed in feathers and acting like an Owl, they won't be looking at your groin.

 

4. Date short woman.

To them everything is larger.  hmnn, that also with myopic and the blind

 

5. I could go on and on.  But in truth your problem isn't physical, its mental.  Get over it.  Focus on something else, being a great lover, great dresser, dancer, being in great shape.  If you want greater confidence with woman there is some decent PUA stuff out there that respects woman while giving guys decent hints on increasing there self esteem.

 

I'm sure at some point you'll get over this because it is ridiculous.  In the mean time if its causing you anguish, take some time to be celibate and don't torture yourself. 

 

Peace Out.

 

In my collection of unusual  guided meditations there's one called Confidence Beach by Isabella Valentine.  Might be worth looking up.  Cause it all about confidence.  

Edited February 12, 2016 by thelerner

[Marblehead]

Hi Bodhidharma,

 

I have said this before but will say it again:  We each are special and unique.  But we each are a manifestation of Dao.

 

My fingers are short and stocky but they can still undo a woman's bra.

 

It's not about what Dao has given us; it's about how we utilize what Dao has given us.

 

Short and long.  What's the difference?  Perspective.  That's all.

 

And besides, you might have the best tools in your garage but if you don't know how to use them they are pretty much useless.

 

To compare our self with someone else is an error.  We can compare our self with only our self.

[wilfred]

besides a womans vagina (a healthy one) has shapeshifting properties - it can mould to the shape and clamp down mercilessly on any size of penis! there's no design flaws

[Apech]

besides a womans vagina (a healthy one) has shapeshifting properties - it can mould to the shape and clamp down mercilessly on any size of penis! there's no design flaws

 

clamp down mercilessly?  Yikes.  Easier - just look for a woman with very small hands.

[liminal_luke]

Very few men would have the inner strength to post about such insecurities, and yet many women value the endowment of an open heart over all else.  What you lack in size you make up for in courage.   

[dust]

If I remember correctly, your last girlfriend broke up with you, hurt you? That was the cause of your spiral? And you're penis size isn't genuinely an issue with most women?

[wilfred]

clamp down mercilessly?  Yikes.  Easier - just look for a woman with very small hands.

 

what a horrible thing that would be eh! maybe not mercilessly, but grant me some artistic license for painting a picture, bodhidharma loved it too.

[Apech]

what a horrible thing that would be eh! maybe not mercilessly, but grant me some artistic license for painting a picture, bodhidharma loved it too.

 

Yes that's some picture you painted there.

[Marblehead]

And both Y'all are coloring way outside the lines.  Hehehe.

[thelerner]

yeah, now you've got me afraid of those merciless clampy shape shifters.. 

[Marblehead]

That, like Dao, can never be described with words.  But it can be experienced.

[AussieTrees]

OK so I'm going to out come out and say it. It's embarrassing and shows how I am not putting the Tao into practice in the last year. So..

I've developed a very strong penis size insecurity. I cannot value my self. I cannot see my self as worthy or strong knowing this part of me is this way. Average range. Size not important.

But the point is its become so strong. I am thinking of hospitalization I want to run away from sex all together and just let go of it if it's really giving me this much suffering. I've struggled every day trying to be OK about it but it's in the back of my mind and it's intense.

Robs all power I have from my being. I used to practice qi gong everyday but slowly stopped. I don't know where to turn. I'm in therapy. I have family supporting me. I am just so weak. And can't fight through this. The only hope I have is to just believe that sex is not needed and that a higher state of mind should be pursued.

I know what I'm saying is imbalanced. Lacks the trust of the tao. But I'm exhausted I can't fight this anymore. I can't find a ground where I accept my self the way I am. No amount of perspective has stuck. My mind clings to the negative.

I am so lost. I don't know what to do anymore.

To feel comfortable with yourself just the way you are,well this is a neat trick.

Ever try chanting,there is chanting for many personal traits.

 

Chantings have magical qualities that help us gain insights into feeling good.

Choose your chant,speak it with voice,then repeat it in your head.

 

After a time of chanting you will still be,only different,best wishes.