Meditation or practice for healthy testosterone / yang resonance (celibate)

[ganjaboy]

I am a nearly 22 year old male and I have chosen at this time of life to be celibate and conserve jing while trying to restore lost chi from childhood. Since I don't have sex, masturbate or watch porn I am afraid my testosterone is low for a male although this may not be rational, I am not sure. But I at least want to train my mind to meditate on sexual desire and transmute it instead of pursuit of temporary pleasure into confidence and personal strength. The longest I have retained is 168 days and I'd like to go indefinitely from this point onward but it means I am going to have to find healthy outlet for fulfillment and accomplishment in life. That's the whole idea though lol. Any thoughts or suggestions? 

[RiverSnake]

Diet and Nutrition: http://www.anabolicmen.com/multivitamin-testosterone/

[vonkrankenhaus]

Use it or lose it.

 

and

 

They say that if you want to walk when you are old, walk when you are young.

 

If you think, or feel, that you "lost" qi "from childhood", then perhaps look into diet and lifestyle aspects first.

 

 

 

 

 

-VonKrankenhaus

[wilfred]

i would recommend looking into diet - specifically tonic herbs like he shou wu, rehmannia, dendrobium. these build jing quite powerfully as after a while you can feel it coming online through physical indicators/hormonal effects. then you start adding in yang tonics for maximum results - cordyceps (respiratory) and eucommia (bones, ligaments, marrow) are very good ones. i don't think there's any need to retain for that long, you can have your cake and eat it if you nail the energetics of what you're consuming.

 

of course you may have extinguished plenty of lust and have ample outlets, but for a guy in his early 20s i do think sharing with women should be on the agenda. especially while living in a western society. retention is useful but that usefulness is relative to the amount of energy you're dealing with and potential issues that need to be worked through. a teacher would be invaluable here.

 

on the meditation tip working through the body is the thing i've found most effective for transmutation, clearing issues and increasing qi output. you need to actively spread your energy/awareness through the body in a balanced way. a good qigong practice helps with this too.

[Orion]

All that conservation and jing produces yin, but it needs to be exercised to be converted to vital yangqi. Jing conservation does not mean you're no longer sexual, it means the energy is channeled differently.

 

You could also get a basic hormone panel done with your doctor, via blood work. It's easy to analyze testosterone levels. If they're on the low end of normal, or abnormal, you could try taking DHEA. It's over the counter in the U.S. and does wonders for the adrenal/testosterone cascade. Anyway, do more research on it before you commit to anything.

[ganjaboy]

The plan is not to remain celibate for my whole life but I feel that there's a bit of a fire that needs to be built especially since I want to do something special with my life. The next 3 or 4 years will be fairly celibate and ascetic for me though while i work on some specific issues in my self. I'd like to get a regular practice going in this time and stay disciplined. I wouldn't rule out starting to see a woman around 25 or 26 if I feel stable enough. 

 

I look at young men my age who engage too much sexually, too early and I think that they are losing too much of that fire too early on in life. It's a scary world out there and to be confidence and achieve I feel that cultivation helps me a lot since it puts a bit of a fight in my soul. 

 

As far as diet, I eat fairly healthy but am getting to the age where my metabolism slows down so I am really avoiding the less wholesome food. Also for whatever reason, I think my system doesn't respond well to heavy, rich foods so I avoid those. I try to stick with plants.

 

Music and meditation are two things I really enjoy. They both make me feel very alive and I am sure are full of life energy. I see too much death in modern society and lifestyle and I don't want to be part of it. 

[RiverSnake]

 

death in modern society and lifestyle and I don't want to be part of it. 

 

Death is important, don't shun it as something evil. That will just create more obstacles for your path.

[RigdzinTrinley]

In the tradition I practice in woman equal wisdom

 

did you see "dr. strangelove" by kubrick? remember mandrake and the general? If not youtube search "I deny them my essence"

 

if you want to get a certain understanding of how the world functions and how energies are moving and manifesting - then well, I think an awake woman can do and show you all sorts of incredible things about yourself and the manifest/unmanifest universe. Actually from a certain point of view, being or trying to be celibate can block you from psycho-spiritual growth, woman are naturally very much in tune with certain aspects of reality that the male counterpart likes to overlook.

 

Now brother please udnerstand that I just talk randomly whatever comes to my mind after reading your posts, and maybe you are destined for a certain lifestyle - but you know, ask a good teacher of a system you feel drawn towards. I just think that making these kind of plans without prober guidance can backfire sometimes, better be sure that what you want to explore with your body.speech and mind will benefit you and all sentient beings for sure, and it is not just some strange conceptual grasping at an image of who you think you should be or how you think you should be or something like that...

 

A personal anecdote: I remember one of my lamas looked me over when I was overly "celibate" wow I was almost holy but also a bit of a stick in the mud and just remarked "Matthias you should get laid"

 

another anecdote: I asked one western teacher what he did when he came back from India after all the years of study and practice there, he said that he learned dancing because he had developed a horrible stick up his ass

 

just saying sometimes our ideas of what genuin spirituality is might not be in line with what it actually is? Then again I don't know you, I am just a dude a little bit older then you - so in essence do what you want

 

A.C. said every woman and man is a star

 

those big shining things know pretty well how to move around the infinite ether so enjoy the ride brother and I wish you a realtively save journey (some adventure should be included too )

Edited April 10, 2016 by RigdzinTrinley

[ganjaboy]

In the tradition I practice in woman equal wisdom

 

did you see "dr. strangelove" by kubrick? remember mandrake and the general? If not youtube search "I deny them my essence"

 

if you want to get a certain understanding of how the world functions and how energies are moving and manifesting - then well, I think an awake woman can do and show you all sorts of incredible things about yourself and the manifest/unmanifest universe. Actually from a certain point of view, being or trying to be celibate can block you from psycho-spiritual growth, woman are naturally very much in tune with certain aspects of reality that the male counterpart likes to overlook.

 

Now brother please udnerstand that I just talk randomly whatever comes to my mind after reading your posts, and maybe you are destined for a certain lifestyle - but you know, ask a good teacher of a system you feel drawn towards. I just think that making these kind of plans without prober guidance can backfire sometimes, better be sure that what you want to explore with your body.speech and mind will benefit you and all sentient beings for sure, and it is not just some strange conceptual grasping at an image of who you think you should be or how you think you should be or something like that...

 

A personal anecdote: I remember one of my lamas looked me over when I was overly "celibate" wow I was almost holy but also a bit of a stick in the mud and just remarked "Matthias you should get laid"

 

another anecdote: I asked one western teacher what he did when he came back from India after all the years of study and practice there, he said that he learned dancing because he had developed a horrible stick up his ass

 

just saying sometimes our ideas of what genuin spirituality is might not be in line with what it actually is? Then again I don't know you, I am just a dude a little bit older then you - so in essence do what you want

 

A.C. said every woman and man is a star

 

those big shining things know pretty well how to move around the infinite ether so enjoy the ride brother and I wish you a realtively save journey (some adventure should be included too )

Thank you for your wisdom and bless you. 

 

I love dancing. Even though the crowd there is often not spiritually "pure"  by any means I love going to big dance festivals with fast loud rhythmic music, often under the influence of certain herbs lol    It helps me release energy that there is very little means for me to do so otherwise. 

 

I never intended the celibate phase to last forever but I want to use it is as a tool just for a few years as part of a wake-up call. Overindulgence sexually in my teens made me weak and too petty. I want to use this time and the power celibacy grants to grow stronger as a person and in my determination and willpower. When I have those, which bring confidence, the women will come more naturally anyways and perhaps around that time I can become interested in a parter and likewise. I'm thinking around 25 here. I'm turning 22 in May. 

 

I ask myself what do I REALLY want out of life? Is it pleasure or fulfillment? To me that is the difference between a boy and a man,  a boy just goes for temporary pleasure while a man seeks deeper meaning, fulfillment and illumination to life. There are many grown males out there still in the former mindset and they can't stop using women just for temporary pleasure. I haven't entered that cycle and I want to avoid doing so while I can. I agree that celibacy alone isn't the end all, be all though and I might actually achieve higher enlightenment having sex, just in the context of a meaningful relationship and balanced with soul sharing and love 

Edited April 10, 2016 by dhiggs

[vtrader125]

You are right in away that young guys waste that energy, but at the same time don't disregard it. Take advantage of your youth and instead have maybe phases. Like for a few months have lots of sex, then for another few months don't. 

Take it from someone who has never had any action and is a lot older, that notion of use it or lose it, applies. 

[ganjaboy]

You are right in away that young guys waste that energy, but at the same time don't disregard it. Take advantage of your youth and instead have maybe phases. Like for a few months have lots of sex, then for another few months don't. 

Take it from someone who has never had any action and is a lot older, that notion of use it or lose it, applies. 

Ideally what I would do would be cultivate for a few years to get myself under control, then have a girlfriend / partner who would be fine with having phases of sex and no sex for spiritual advancement, hopefully of us both. Jewish couples actually do this to help intermittently rebuild the lust and love between each other, it's supposed to be healthy for the relationship. 

[RigdzinTrinley]

I like not planing my sex life for the next 5 years and see what the great mother is preparing and having in store for me

 

my two cents: the whole thing is in actuallity "out of control", so it could end up being very exhausting to "stay in control"

Edited April 12, 2016 by RigdzinTrinley

[ganjaboy]

I like not planing my sex life for the next 5 years and see what the great mother is preparing and having in store for me

 

my two cents: the whole thing is in actuallity "out of control", so it could end up being very exhausting to "stay in control"

Funny you should say that lol. It has come to my attention that there are in fact a few females who fancy me. It can be interesting, while cultivating or being celibate , to take note of that attraction and use part of the energy to help confidence as a man.  But important to keep ego out of it too  

[RigdzinTrinley]

did you read about king arthurs court? the grail stories and parcival? we westernrs are actually hopeless romantics - but anyway thats another story

 

take care, I don't really answer any of your questions so I will slowly vanish from this thread

[Golden Dragon Shining]

I would say people need to stop thinking they are losing something or making some sacrifice  and see that they are gaining something. Obverse animals in the wild, they have mating seasons, once per year to procreate, and they are all of exceptional vigor, strength etc. There is no need for any special practices, this is perhaps the problem, do not put much thought into it, you set what you want and drop that which doesn't serve you, say I have not had alcohol in over 2 years. I do not meditate daily to control myself or do any special practice, I saw it was not benefiting me and cast it from my life in one moment. Is a stag practicing celibacy? Or just being natural? I would say you can connect with some women more so with this, some there will be no energy, others there will be a resonance of a kind, magnetic/ intuitive connection. I don't think we are suppose to connect with all people. I was in the city the other day walking past many people, one woman I went past though sparked my heart and a very pleasant feeling pulsed through my body. I kept walking. No attachment, gratitude for the brief encounter. Like a butterfly in spring.

The building energy I at times when inhaling move upward and through my entire body, very simple little time or effort. I think the energy of it's own will start to do this. I have trust in the awareness of the body.

You will have more profound experiences I think, and the other will seem like a shadow in comparison. People are stuck on this shadow not knowing any greater.

Just another approach to things which can carry over into other. A lucid dream recently with this beautiful woman, a very pleasant "orgasmic" dance of a kind, maybe like the yin and yang rotating around each other. There was hardly any physical contact. It is just a change in approach. Enjoy and continue on.

My experience so far anyhow.

 

Edited April 14, 2016 by Sionnach

[futuredaze]

Diet, making sure you get enough vitamins and nutrients. Zinc, for instance, is good for libido (among other things).

 

Herbs are good, certain foods too.

 

Finally, exercise. I dont lift weights anymore, but when I did it definitelty increased testosterone, confidence, and energy levels. Be careful not to overdo it. Taichi seems to be very balancing, giving more sexual energy but not as intensive as weightlifting.5

[thelerner]

this

Finally, exercise. .. lift weights .., but when I did it definitelty increased testosterone, confidence, and energy levels. Be careful not to overdo it.

Being 22 you are facing an uphill battle.  imo, If it starts effecting your life in a highly negative way, I'd vote for graceful surrender.   From what I've read celibacy is best when it happens naturally.   And/or when you have an art that supports the jing to chi conversion, and those tend to be involved.

Edited June 12, 2016 by thelerner

[ganjaboy]

this

Being 22 you are facing an uphill battle.  imo, If it starts effecting your life in a highly negative way, I'd vote for graceful surrender (and make the most of it, google Slow Down by Isabella Valentine)  From what I've read celibacy is best when it happens naturally.   And/or when you have an art that supports the jing to chi conversion, and those tend to be involved.

As someone who has not had a lot of confidence and has spent a LOT of time jerking off (namely, nearly 7 years lol), I would like to avoid that route if possible. I'm desperate to change my life and even if the practices to convert the jing to chi and joy and lust for life are difficult, I am willing to commit to an involved practice, short of an actual relationship with sex of course. I just want more out of life. 

[ganjaboy]

a question...If i've spent about 8 years with masturbation, but spend the next 9 strictly celibate and restoring jing, shen, and chi...will i feel "younger" when i'm 30 then i am now? my inner sense of balance leads me to believe that a young man possesses more of all of these than an older one...i just recall a magical feeling of lack of inhibition and lightness in the body, clear thinking, lack of anxiety, all of which are things that are plaguing me now and i am starting to worry for my health. I ultimately want a relationship but one which does not destroy essence while making love..key phrase making LOVE! not giving in to adolescent animal desire 

[WisteriaWinds]

Thighs parallel horse stance, magnesium, zinc, and selenium...all daily. See if celibacy makes sense to you anymore. If it does, keep it up. Otherwise, give it up.

 

Listen to your body.

[ganjaboy]

Thighs parallel horse stance, magnesium, zinc, and selenium...all daily. See if celibacy makes sense to you anymore. If it does, keep it up. Otherwise, give it up.

 

Listen to your body.

Since i'm young and still uncertain and starting out, celibacy does make sense to me. It's also clear to me when I retain that i am preserving life because it restores what i can describe as an ecstatic feeling of sexual self-containment ...and I would bet if i stayed celibate for years it could reach the level of joy I had for sex just as a young boy. 

 

I believe the detriment is caused when essence is wasted needlessly and repeatedly, if I could have my way I would never do so again short of for procreation because i did so needlessly in my younger years. I am going to use the energy to better my life, gain compassion and insight and strength at the same time. 

 

And one day, i do intend on having a sexual relationship with a woman i am in love with, hopefully one who is spiritually in tune so it could be true lovemaking that involves energy exchange, give and take, not just one-way. 

[WisteriaWinds]

Since i'm young and still uncertain and starting out, celibacy does make sense to me. It's also clear to me when I retain that i am preserving life because it restores what i can describe as an ecstatic feeling of sexual self-containment ...and I would bet if i stayed celibate for years it could reach the level of joy I had for sex just as a young boy.

 

I believe the detriment is caused when essence is wasted needlessly and repeatedly, if I could have my way I would never do so again short of for procreation because i did so needlessly in my younger years. I am going to use the energy to better my life, gain compassion and insight and strength at the same time.

 

And one day, i do intend on having a sexual relationship with a woman i am in love with, hopefully one who is spiritually in tune so it could be true lovemaking that involves energy exchange, give and take, not just one-way.

Yeah, energy follows economics. People should have a college level text on micro- and macro-economics sitting next to their Bible and Tao Te Ching.

[ganjaboy]

Yeah, energy follows economics. People should have a college level text on micro- and macro-economics sitting next to their Bible and Tao Te Ching.

What a lot of guys don't realize is that by being a player with women, for instance, they're really just robbing their own bank account with no possibility of return. And porn and jacking off isn't any better because there isn't even any possibility of giving to someone else. I'm coming to these realizations because i'm at the point where i'm juuuust starting to subtly age and am becoming more aware of how losing jing effects you. I want to get on a spiritual grind now and still feel like a teenage boy at 60 lol. Which i think is totally possible to do while still having a sexual relationship....just one that's a component of a very deep relationship with a great degree of emotional and spiritual connection. People need to understand each other more. 

Edited June 11, 2016 by dhiggs

[WisteriaWinds]

What a lot of guys don't realize is that by being a player with women, for instance, they're really just robbing their own bank account with no possibility of return. And porn and jacking off isn't any better because there isn't even any possibility of giving to someone else. I'm coming to these realizations because i'm at the point where i'm juuuust starting to subtly age and am becoming more aware of how losing jing effects you. I want to get on a spiritual grind now and still feel like a teenage boy at 60 lol. Which i think is totally possible to do while still having a sexual relationship....just one that's a component of a very deep relationship with a great degree of emotional and spiritual connection. People need to understand each other more.

You're not a closed system. Nothing's lost.

[thelerner]

a question...If i've spent about 8 years with masturbation, but spend the next 9 strictly celibate and restoring jing, shen, and chi...will i feel "younger" when i'm 30 then i am now?

I don't know.  I'd probably vote no, though.  Not unless you were supporting celibacy with some specific meditative arts.  And there's a chance if you did the arts and not the celibacy you'd still feel better after 9 years of training.   And there's a chance you'd have problems and/or find the life style too limiting a way to spend your 20's.  Celibacy is not a magic wand; more a tricky practice with potential problems and benefits.