What ways do you transmute sexual energy?

[misterziegler]

What are some ways others here, transform their sexual energy or transmute it, as in using it for something more.

 

I used to have sex 2-3 times a day with my partner. This went on too long. It ruined our relationship, it became a grimy feeling addiction which i began to fill with porn while at work as well. I was having 4-5 orgasms a day. All loveless, even the ones with my partner save for a few.

 

2-3 years later i am alone. I can keep from the urge for about 2 weeks now. Every 2 weeks i have been purging the urge so to say.

 

What are some tips and tricks to

A) During the time leading up to before i even have the urge, what are some practices others may do that diverts this energy elswhere? Art, Talking to a friend, a journal entry perhaps? I commonly write about other things that come to mind or the urge itself

 

During time of said urge itself, what are some "emergency" diversion or rather, transmuting techniques to better use the energy elswhere

 

and

C) Should i just be okay with spending that energy every week or two weeks in the "natural" way?

 

 

This is something i have more or less decided to be okay with accepting lately, which helps because i used to be self ashamed every time. So i am at least this far. Now i want to explore intelligent ways to transmute my sexual energy to creativity other than sexual acts and want to hear about anyone else's experience with this., I DO notice a huge difference in my mental acuity and daily energy improvements since i have gone from so many orgasms per day down to one or two per two weeks.

[liminal_luke]

This is something i have more or less decided to be okay with accepting lately, which helps because i used to be self ashamed every time. 

 

Here´s what I believe.  For most people, most of the time, masturbation or sex with a concensual partner whenever you feel like it is best.  For some people in limited circumstances, holding off from having sex can be useful.

 

What´s not useful -- for anybody at any time -- is feeling ashamed.  I don´t care how many times you cum a day, feeling shame always makes things worse and never better.

[Kar3n]

Meditate

Tai Chi

QiGong

Work out

  weights

  run

  yoga

Journal

Read

 

There are a lot of things you can do, all it takes is refocusing your mind onto something else.

I believe I read somewhere it takes 21 days to create or break a habit.

 

Good luck

[C T]

I believe I read somewhere it takes 21 days to create or break a habit.

So did i, until yesterday that is. Apparently its 66 days. 

 

 

 

 

On average, it takes more than 2 months before a new behavior becomes automatic — 66 days to be exact. And how long it takes a new habit to form can vary widely depending on the behavior, the person, and the circumstances. In Lally’s study, it took anywhere from 18 days to 254 days for people to form a new habit. 

 

In other words, if you want to set your expectations appropriately, the truth is that it will probably take you anywhere from two months to eight months to build a new behavior into your life — not 21 days.

(according to research done by the University College, London)

[ilumairen]

My response to this has been to dance; sometimes it works better than others.

 

 

 

 

 

 

[liminal_luke]

I made a recent discovery about myself, and, if you´re like me, it might help.  For me, the desire to have sex is often preceded by some sort of semi-conscious twist of conflicting emotions that I don´t understand and would rather not deal with.  When I sit down and really get to the bottom of whatever it is that´s niggling at me (say by just writing out whatever is on my mind for an hour), the desire to have sex just isn´t there anymore.

Edited May 30, 2016 by liminal_luke

[Songtsan]

Instead of focusing the energy on some outer form separate from my own body, I limit it to being turned on by my own self, and feel the energy circulating throughout my body. Also, less time spent pursuing sexual delights = more time to spend cultivating..

[Aetherous]

The mind is powerful. It can be easy to suppress or repress sexuality, which leads to it expressing in less than healthy ways.

So it's important to not be thinking "I'm distracting myself with this right now so that I won't experience sexual thoughts"...that's already thinking sexual thoughts.

The mind simply has to be on something else, 100%. It takes time to set out with this knowledge and make it happen...at first, you can't help but suppress/repress to some extent. After a while, you're able to lose sight of sexuality from time to time.

When you can do that, it helps to be busy doing things. Have a job. Have a hobby or five. Read books. Exercise.

When you're busy doing things, avoid doing things that stimulate sexuality. For instance, don't go to yoga class. There are tons of beautiful women in those classes wearing skin tight clothing...not a wise environment to exercise for a guy who needs less sexuality in his life.

Imagine working at a manufacturing facility, where you have to set something in a machine, and then stay clear of the machine and press a button so that it does something. In that environment, you're not going to be stimulated by sexual images.

So...don't avoid; don't suppress/repress. But simply put the mind onto other things as best you can. Develop your interests...for instance, learn a foreign language. Meditate. Go for nature hikes. Learn about investing in the stock market.

It especially helps if you have a practice which makes your mind more clear and your heart more open and soft. Lust is like the lowest form of this energy, love is a higher form...compassion, which is having so much love that you actually act on it to help others, is the highest.

So that's all for before you have the urge. You can manage yourself like that for as long as you want, once you are cultivated enough...it's possible to be celibate for life after a certain point. It might take years to get to that level of development.

If you already have the urge, you're kind of screwed. It's not that you're 100% helpless, such as in that very moment you can't help but touch yourself or someone else. We have enough self control to hold off for a while, but we'll go a little crazy, and we will have to sooner or later do something about it...just in my opinion. So if it's a matter of looking at porn at work, or not...perhaps you could think about the consequences of such actions. What if you were caught? Would you lose your job? Are you willing to face that just to look at porn in that setting? Can't you wait?

Try to focus on the tasks at hand, even if they're boring. Every moment can be a meditation. Just have mindfulness of what's going on, and get out of your head.

Being distracted away from sexuality is the key...the sooner the better. Having spiritual practices which transmute the energy is just icing on the cake.

And when in a good relationship, try to not have too much of a good thing. Intimacy, which is what we're actually looking for, is more than just banging. Creating memories is an overlooked part of relationships...go explore places, take videos of it. Talk about your childhood, what excites you, what your dreams and vision for your life are. Also, sexuality can be a sacred thing if you take it to that level. A spiritual practices that develops and heals both of you. It sounds like the type of sex in the previous relationship wasn't very healing...some issue must have been there which caused you both to spiral downward with it, rather than upward.

[ilumairen]

Aetherous, have you worked in manufacturing?

[misterziegler]

Thank you for your knowledge all, and thanks most to Aetherous.

 

Your response has evoked new hope within me, now i am aiming to cultivate myself on my own.

 

Yes many factors involved in our downward spiral and the sex among lots of recreational partying was... distracting us from our problems we weren't facing. In a nut shell I've faced all those problems, including the porn addiction. I have read others' views and experiences briefly with tantric sex and a few other words on sacred forms of intimacy. And sex is something I am willing to try at those levels with somebody very special one day. However I do know ultimate celibacy is something I will achieve in my lifetime.

 

I feel very on the surface of my own mind and capabilities all the time. Something keeps me from diving in. Sometimes I feel like it isnt me. I do break through into deep focus and meditation and states of very receptive mind now and then, but not nearly as often as i'd like. Maybe 1-2 days a week i can acheive this.

 

A little off topic here.

 

An empath who has known me for many years has come to stay here and she says the presence she felt some time when she stayed before is still here and it follows me. I see my dog looking at my back sometimes, over my shoulder behind me at the air. And so does my friend as i walk from room to room, she sees the dog watching the air as well. When i am reading or doing something quietly, something trips my bird motion sensor, as if knowing i will hear it because i am doing a silent activity at the moment. My cats always visit me and sleep by me and like to be in the same room as me. And when they are around it feels like something bad has suddenly gone, however i didnt notice the air was even heavy until the cats came and the air became light .

 

I used to deny the possibility of a presence in my mind and forget about it, distracting myself same as with overcoming porn and masturbation.. however certain things pop out at me, not from my own mind, to remind me of said possibility.

 

I can no longer deny it, i used to believe if i acknowledged it then i was manifesting it on my own. This is not the case.

 

I awoke one day in mid afternoon, my curtains were holding out the sunlight, and to the right of my door was a cloud of black smoke, barely swirling. I am 24 and have never seen such a thing. I am not a drug user nor do i partake in alcohol use, i odnt even smoke.

 

I felt nothing when i saw it, and layed back down and shut my eyes, i knew something was there and i didnt feel like it wanted to hurt me. I lay and meditated light from within the bottom of my stomach growing larger and brighter. Breeding good feelings. And I opened my eyes and it was gone of course.

 

After this i know that there is a presence here.

 

My empath friend slept over 2-3 years ago and she astroprojects a lot. She said as she was on her way out the window she saw a similar figure watching from next to a tree outside.

 

Now its in my house.

 

I burnt sage one day and marked x's on every doorway and window, barring entities from entering or exiting, leaving my doors open for them to exit, clapping loudly and exclaiming in positive tones that this was my castle and "it" was not welcome here. This is the only thing i realy have done in combattance. My house felt much better for a month after this. However this was BEFORE i awoke to the presence 5 feet from my bed not too long ago. Maybe 10 weeks now?

 

Any thoughts?

Edited May 31, 2016 by misterziegler

[Aetherous]

Aetherous, have you worked in manufacturing?

 

I did a little bit, but it was part of a job that was mostly assembly line work. 

[Aetherous]

Any thoughts?

 

What we cultivate is similar to what we attract. I've personally noticed that being angry and vengeful brings more shadow beings around...but cultivating love and high spirituality makes them go away. They also tend to be around unclean places, so keep your place nice and clean. And dispel them, as you have already done. Just what I think.

[ganjaboy]

I've read a lot of Jewish mysticism and am now of the opinion that certain acts of sexual immorality can actually cause demons to come into being. I think masturbation and porn is relatively harmless in a boy's childhood or early teens, but once his mind has the understand and reasoning to know better, I believe it becomes far more detrimental. 

 

Basically I think that when you cum to an image of a woman.. even if she's not there, you've still had sex with her, the girl in the youtube video, the porn video, on craigslist, whatever. Again, when a guy is young, i think all it does is get rid of your sex drive for awhile, which for a young horny guy isn't always a bad thing. But when you get older i think it starts to really suck your Qi. I can already start to feel it, and I don't like that feeling.

 

Especially because for a lot of guys the hookup culture, porn and jacking off is accompanied by bad health habits on the whole...things that really speak to a lack of self respect. How many guys do you know who let themselves go in their late teens or early 20s...like shitty diet, drinking too much, etc. 

 

Thing is, the woman you fapped to got your Qi, even on a cosmic level. You might not know it immediately, but you've lost something temporarily that will take effort and time to replace, energy that could have been used creatively, or to bring a new life into the world, or it could have been during actual lovemaking (not just 'fucking') where you're exchanging Qi energy with your lady friend and ideally you don't even come. 

 

I believe this is the reason women usually live longer than men, why men seem to get more hollow, angry and withdrawn with age, and why women generally seem to have more energy and be happier on the whole. I also believe it's at the root of a lot of violence in the world and the misunderstandings and lack of respect between the genders. 

 

This has been discussed elsewhere on the board but I think overload of porn, masturbation, and male orgasm / ejaculation changes your body too, i don't want to say for the worse but it definitely is a less gentle lifestyle. Your body gets harder, more heated, more Yang and also you will need more Yang in your diet to account for what you've lost. It's the basic reason why boys' bodies change into men's. But my personal definition of a man is very non-physical. 

 

I'm taking a good year or so to really take some care of my own health which hasn't been great lately due to poor diet and a lot of work. Yoga, mediation, walking, and changing up what you eat goes a long way. The key word, for me at least, is gentle. It takes time to see change in the body and it also takes time to repair damage done. The secret is doing so before it's too late. 

Edited June 27, 2016 by dhiggs

[EmeraldHead]

Besides what Kar3n said, I have two things. First, you must will to abstain and keep doing other things. The desire will go away on its own. Your increase in energy is an increase in vitality and with this comes more chi. When chi is free it goes up to the brain and because the brain is not pushed that free energy causes lust -IMHO at least. So the second thing is, hardcore concentration exercises aka neuroplasticity. I have discovered this guys work only recently myself:

 

I am on day 20 something and I am looking to stay in full bramacharya for a while at least. I have been struggling with this for a bit now but anyway in these 20 days I have not had one urge, absouletly zero lust. And I have pumped up my brain all day long almost everyday. I've had no free chi running around and still don't have much. 

 

I have abstained for longer periods before and right now I am having the same desire for sex as if I were about 2 months in (60 days) or so. With increased concentration powers comes attention control which is mental strength/toughness/concentration which pumps more acitvity/heat/chi into the brain which produces more neuroplasticity/changes/re-wiring or old habits.

 

Also no nocturnal emmisions which are usually a problem for me after about 2 weeks of abstaining. Healthy lifystyle, working out, fasting one day a week, etc. plus this kind of training all day long will make your celibacy WAY WAY easier than you can imagine. (check out the whole youtube channel and join the facebook group).

[Chi Boy]

Besides what Kar3n said, I have two things. First, you must will to abstain and keep doing other things. The desire will go away on its own. Your increase in energy is an increase in vitality and with this comes more chi. When chi is free it goes up to the brain and because the brain is not pushed that free energy causes lust -IMHO at least. So the second thing is, hardcore concentration exercises aka neuroplasticity. I have discovered this guys work only recently myself:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l9wdPPBYuJ4

 

I am on day 20 something and I am looking to stay in full bramacharya for a while at least. I have been struggling with this for a bit now but anyway in these 20 days I have not had one urge, absouletly zero lust. And I have pumped up my brain all day long almost everyday. I've had no free chi running around and still don't have much.

 

I have abstained for longer periods before and right now I am having the same desire for sex as if I were about 2 months in (60 days) or so. With increased concentration powers comes attention control which is mental strength/toughness/concentration which pumps more acitvity/heat/chi into the brain which produces more neuroplasticity/changes/re-wiring or old habits.

 

Also no nocturnal emmisions which are usually a problem for me after about 2 weeks of abstaining. Healthy lifystyle, working out, fasting one day a week, etc. plus this kind of training all day long will make your celibacy WAY WAY easier than you can imagine. (check out the whole youtube channel and join the facebook group).

 

The whole neroscience thing feels like its putting age old techniques into a scientific category.

 

The subject of Brahmacharya interests me greatly. Is there any reading materials that could help me understand this further?

Edited June 29, 2016 by Chi Boy

[EmeraldHead]

The whole neroscience thing feels like its putting age old techniques into a scientific category.

 

The subject of Brahmacharya interests me greatly. Is there any reading materials that could help me understand this further?

It feels like it but it is not like it. You are going to ignore something valuable just because you don't like the atmosphere it gives ?!? Get some cold water and have a good look at those exercises and start practicing, you will thank me and yourself later, I promise. 

 

Brahmacharya...well: 

http://yoga108.org/pages/show/96-brahmacharya-control-of-the-senses-or-chastity-one-of-the-ethical-precepts-of-yoga

http://www.dlshq.org/teachings/brahmacharya.htm

http://www.yoga-age.com/modern/brahma.html

This video sums it up nicely :

[EmeraldHead]

Also practice concentration. Chi gathers in the lower centers and then it every now and then send in bulk amount through the spine to the brain to balance energy the human system. All that free energy results in lust because the brain is functioning in energy saving mode for normal people. By practicing concentration hardcore I not only find I am pushing my mind to the max in terms of chi all the time but sometimes I may get a small erection and then I do some special concentration. Slowly, slowly the chi that pumps my sexual organ is dissipated into the upper region, in the brain. The same way you fast with the body, mental development allows the sexual organs to fast and be regulated = controled. 

 

Hence the reason for all this religious talk and virtue practice. After a while the sexual energy is absolutely IMMENSE. If you live a normal life in the a normal city you have little chance of succeeding. I know people who have and have been celibate for years. But are you going to be one of them? Concentration will help you a ton!

Edited June 30, 2016 by Arramu

[misterziegler]

Also practice concentration. Chi gathers in the lower centers and then it every now and then send in bulk amount through the spine to the brain to balance energy the human system. All that free energy results in lust because the brain is functioning in energy saving mode for normal people. By practicing concentration hardcore I not only find I am pushing my mind to the max in terms of chi all the time but sometimes I may get a small erection and then I do some special concentration. Slowly, slowly the chi that pumps my sexual organ is dissipated into the upper region, in the brain. The same way you fast with the body, mental development allows the sexual organs to fast and be regulated = controled. 

 

Hence the reason for all this religious talk and virtue practice. After a while the sexual energy is absolutely IMMENSE. If you live a normal life in the a normal city you have little chance of succeeding. I know people who have and have been celibate for years. But are you going to be one of them? Concentration will help you a ton!

Question about fasting with the body, what does that essentially do? i fasted for 16 hours a few weeks back and i reached some states of mind i havent been in for a while and it was nice.

[EmeraldHead]

Question about fasting with the body, what does that essentially do? i fasted for 16 hours a few weeks back and i reached some states of mind i havent been in for a while and it was nice.

Lol man, do some more. I do 30-40h in one go every week. Well it heals it. Science says grow hormone (HGH) goes to 2000%-3000% after 24h of fasting and even more as you continue to fast. So 20 to 30 times more! And you are going to feel that. I notice my bones feel REALLY fresh after a good fast. In other words some deep growth and healing happens that would not happen otherwise without fasting. I mean it feels like my bone borrow is better. From how fresh my bones feel and how strong and flexible they feel after when I come out of the fast and I start working out and tensing and stuff if I were to not fast and just work out and live healthy it would take probably MONTHS if not years to do the kind of deep healing for my bones that makes feel that fresh, strong and flexible.

 

And you can feel a lot of detoxification going on. I sometimes feel in my abdomen or so as I have many tubes (of blood, lymph whatever) and because of the fast it feel like my body is pumping high pressure liquid in there to clean then properly. Feel good and healthy. But around that time is when I get hungry too  

 

So the timeline I noticed so far is it takes 6 hours for the start to fast aka for you to start being light headed or easy going because you haven't eaten. Although lately I barely notice this because I've been cultivating. The 24 hours are bad, because the body keeps asking your for food. After 26/27 hours it gets easy and you won't be hungry anymore. At that point you start to notice your bones like your shoulder and your arms tendons are more flexible and they just feel younger. 

 

Your aura also is cleaner while fasting for some reason...

 

I notice fasting makes me as if I have jerked off. My body kind of smeel like then and my body language and my performance kind of takes me 2 weeks back on my celibacy progress. But after I come out and I have 2 nice meals, yh its good. I feel awesome. The deep bone and bone marrow growth feels good, my body feels awesome and strong and my brain feels like it had some needed fresh air. Its awesome. Do as much as you can every week. One fast, for the rest of your life. In a few years years, accoridng to bodri's timeline of bigu your lifespan should have increased by a bit because of your efforts. 

 

But stay celibate man. Dont jerk off to porn to 2 days in a row then go fasting...lol I'm not even sure if its okay to fast the body right after going solo. So stay celibate, cultivate and your fasting will make your stronger instead of starving you. 

[misterziegler]

Lol man, do some more. I do 30-40h in one go every week. Well it heals it. Science says grow hormone (HGH) goes to 2000%-3000% after 24h of fasting and even more as you continue to fast. So 20 to 30 times more! And you are going to feel that.............

 

Arramu, this makes good sense to me. Of course, the body is going to produce its own food, tapping into stowed away supply in the most precious ways in the absence of food. Sort of also a reward for the discipline of fasting also. The weirdest secrets are waiting to be unlocked.. I am glad i began this thread back in may. Thanks Arramu. I am going to begin my own fasting journey at this very moment and see what fasting can be for me personally.

 

I've stayed up, without the help of caffiene or drugs for 48 hours plus before (7 years ago) (however i was eating off and on during this time, just very little, as eating would make me sleepy) and i recall having waking dreams , and also my brain was producing solutions to "problems" without my barely trying. i was enlightened in that time, and it was a spiritual experience really. not that i acheived the answer to some great mystery, but i may as well have. it was simply a beautiful experience.

 

your thoughts on staying up during a fast?

 

also, when fasting, do you limit your physical activity?

[EmeraldHead]

your thoughts on staying up during a fast?

 

also, when fasting, do you limit your physical activity?

You lack chi during fasting, thats what makes the brain dead. Train concentration. And earth (earthing) and sungaze if you can.  Yes I dont work out, maybe a bit in the morning of the fasting day. After 2-3pm I try to stay away from people because I am quite 'dry' by then. I dry to just chill in the evening, personal time

[ganjaboy]

The celibacy and mind training has gotten easier for me in my early 20s, I think that as a very young man or teen it's borderline impossible because the energy is just too intense yet. It's not that i'm less virile or sexual, I still intend on having a sexual relationship some day, but the thoughts and impulses are not helping me at present. I've learned now to be able to see a beautiful women, appreciate it but let the thoughts go, and the same when I feel myself becoming aroused. 

 

Fasting does wonders, I am one of the few who believes it can heal the body (as long as you eat right and use your body as well). Once you realize that in many cases eating can actually sap you of energy it changes everything. 

 

I'm doing all this now so that i can actually make something of my 20s and not be ruled by base impulses like so many other young men are. The young men who squander it all very early are the ones who end up homeless, jobless, drug addicts, or still doing shitty work later in life. 

 

It is my hope that it will result in a more positive lifestyle in my 30s and a very fulfilling relationship with the right woman. 

[RiverSnake]

Useful: http://www.thedaobums.com/topic/13922-making-love-with-the-earth/?hl=%2Bsemen+%2Bretention

[ganjaboy]

Useful: http://www.thedaobums.com/topic/13922-making-love-with-the-earth/?hl=%2Bsemen+%2Bretention

 

That is very useful. As a single guy myself I have found that there is a strong impetus to increase your yang in order to gain more attraction from women. 

 

The truth is that women are, with some exceptions, usually more attracted to men who are more yang. But i have found the probably with trying to increase your yang, too quickly or for the wrong reasons, leaves you imbalanced; I've noticed I just feel empty and a lot of subtle feelings i like to call "inner child" have faded. Also if you are simply trying to gain attraction of that type - you have to remember it's at a base level...formed in desire and ending in reproduction, thus loss of your essence. Death, really. 

 

That i guess, is the reason i'm discriminating with regard to relationships yet, because I would like to find a woman who understands what i'm really trying to find. A lover AND a partner. Easier said than done, but again, balance. My hope is that eventually the cultivation energy will supersede a lot of the other barriers, and I get the feeling that will become easier with age. 

 

Gandhi weighed 100 lbs and was a very slight unassuming man physically. But he led his followers in protest. People who become stuck at the physical barrier are lacking heart-fire. 

 

I make music, i think it's my calling, and there are a lot of advanced ways to channel your energies into it. 

Edited July 9, 2016 by dhiggs

[ganjaboy]

Double post but just another thought: i dunno if anyone here buys astrology but i think the cultivation path is different for everyone, as the linked post above by OldChi mentions, and knowing your specific type might help a lot. 

 

example: I am a Taurus. When you think of a bull you think of a very virile animal, a lot of times the adjective "fertile" is used, so in a way it makes sense to cultivate essence with this sign because you become more radiant.

 

The key for Taurus is to overcome the primal bull nature and evolve to a higher state. I think two of Taurus' largest vices are food and sex. For instance, some Taurus people started out early in life in less evolved states and then progressed.Malcolm X for instance was a pimp when a young man and then turned his life around for the good. A lot of Taurus people also over indulge in food and drink and become overweight. With the bull you also think a masculine animal, but ironically Taurus is a female sign. Female signs are receptive and magnetic, and draw their strength from internal reserves, which is the path I am feeling is calling me deep down. For some people taking a very aggressive, direct approach just burns them out too fast, and I feel that is the case for me. Better to practice meditation and abstinence, and take a powerful, persistent and more subtle approach. 

Edited July 9, 2016 by dhiggs