Attraction and Energy

[seadog]

Once again, thanks for all the replies, and tidbits of wisdom. Someone mentioned you have to not want it, and I've been thinking about this lately. How is it that you make yourself not want something, and if you're trying to not want it doesn't that mean you really do want it? If anyone knows how to make certain desires subside (other than satisfying it), plz enlighten me, cause for sure sexual desire in my case, is given even more preference than food.

 

Thanks

Peace

If your deepest desire is for the benifit of others and yourself then wanting and not wanting disappear in an instant.

[Djshorty]

Hey White Tiger,

Nice to meet ya too . Yeaa, I'm just getting into this whole energy work thing, I never use to believe it. I've always looked for the quick route in my life, and so I would never put in the practice necessary to get results. For the first time I'm actually sticking with something, and enjoying it. What you say about sometimes getting favorable experiences, and other times getting the darker experiences from your energy work, resonates with me. I suppose there is no way of getting around the nastier parts of ourselves, just as we don't have daylight 24 hrs a day, we can't have the good without the bad (no matter how much we try to get it). By the way, we're the same age bro, so I guess we are both going through a lot of the same experiences.

 

I think it comes down to the human desire for happiness; we are all trying to fill a void in our lives. In order to fill that void, some of us sleep with as many women as possible, others watch T.V., some chase money, and there are the few of us that search for spiritual experiences. When I dig deep down to find out why I'm doing meditation, or why I'm going to work, or going to university, I find that the desire is the same. I'm looking for eternal happiness. To me this is the root of the tree, and from this root stem all other desires. Question is, how do we get rid of the root? For now, I'll continue to use my will like you said, in order to stop grasping for the leaves (women), and start trying to dig up the root. As for a taoist transmission, I have my fingers crossed that I'll find a teacher like the one depicted in The Peaceful Warrior. I'm guessing the teacher will come to me when I'm ready, but for now I'm also on my own.

 

Hi Seadog,

Great answer. It would be easy for me to agree and say "yes my ultimate desire is to benefit others, and myself", but I wouldn't be telling the truth. No doubt, I've always tried to help others out, but I don't think that's my main desire. Eternal happiness seems to be what I'm chasing (even through giving to the poor, and helping others). Is it possible to cultivate different desires? Alan Watts made a point in one of his books saying something along the lines of, "you can't force yourself to love someone". Maybe we can't force ourselves to desire something.

 

Thanks all for the input

[joeblast]

in that regard, what is happiness? what makes you happy? sometimes ya just gotta keep digging

[Mal]

It would be easy for me to agree and say "yes my ultimate desire is to benefit others, and myself", but I wouldn't be telling the truth. No doubt, I've always tried to help others out, but I don't think that's my main desire. Eternal happiness seems to be what I'm chasing

 

Happyness is a great place to start. Investigate it like joeblast suggested

 

I remember having a huge argument with my Dad at 18 saying "All I want is to be happy" and he was yelling "Nobody is happy all the time" And he made me Work and go to Uni, which turned out to be good things!

 

This is why I think life experiences helps with desires (an answer that always annoyed me in my 20's) because I was the same. Straight out of high school and into Uni all I was interested in was being happy, I would not even say that I tried to be nice to others, I was very ego centric. Slowly over time as I meet more and more people I've come to want to help others to be as happy as me.

 

But I would not have wanted to be like I am now back at 20. Although it would have been nice to find my Tai Chi teacher earlier in life. But the journey to 34 has been fun and I've tried a lot of cool stuff that made it an interesting ride, and once you get experiences that you would write about like :-

"I always thought the letters to your magazine were made up. Then this happened to me...."

it makes it a LOT easier to overcome desire than it was at 20, where my partner and I once used 24 condoms in 2 days............. good times

 

Enjoy yourself and do what feels right.

[WhiteTiger]

Hey White Tiger,

Nice to meet ya too . Yeaa, I'm just getting into this whole energy work thing, I never use to believe it. I've always looked for the quick route in my life, and so I would never put in the practice necessary to get results. For the first time I'm actually sticking with something, and enjoying it. What you say about sometimes getting favorable experiences, and other times getting the darker experiences from your energy work, resonates with me.

 

I am no teacher and I can not transmit some things I do practice or used to practice.

So i will explain it as best as I can

 

I'm not sure exactly what your talking about what "you say getting favorable experiences and other times getting darker experiences from your energy work, resonates with me" But personally I was talking about illusions. Even the pleasant experiences I have had with relationships with females is in the most idealistic way it is wrong because your lose Jing in any act of sexuality. You can even lose little bits without sexual acts. Even if your in relationship to help them out as they are to help you out. But there is nothing wrong with helping out each other. Its a great and positive thing just my take on it is not at the expense of your own Jing to keep the relationship going. You both would have to be Celibate. Which if i could have a relationship like that, well that would almost be a dream come true. But then again why are you in the marriage or relationship? Are you using your own time while you could be cultivating instead using energy to help out your relationship partner. Its all about Ying and Yang. Polar Opposites. Choices you have to make.

 

 

 

I suppose there is no way of getting around the nastier parts of ourselves, just as we don't have daylight 24 hrs a day, we can't have the good without the bad (no matter how much we try to get it). By the way, we're the same age bro, so I guess we are both going through a lot of the same experiences.

 

I think it comes down to the human desire for happiness; we are all trying to fill a void in our lives. In order to fill that void, some of us sleep with as many women as possible, others watch T.V., some chase money, and there are the few of us that search for spiritual experiences. When I dig deep down to find out why I'm doing meditation, or why I'm going to work, or going to university, I find that the desire is the same. I'm looking for eternal happiness. To me this is the root of the tree, and from this root stem all other desires. Question is, how do we get rid of the root? For now, I'll continue to use my will like you said, in order to stop grasping for the leaves (women), and start trying to dig up the root. As for a taoist transmission, I have my fingers crossed that I'll find a teacher like the one depicted in The Peaceful Warrior. I'm guessing the teacher will come to me when I'm ready, but for now I'm also on my own.

 

I got a few things to say here. One is Ying and Yang. The theory signifies about polar opposites. So the belief is the universe was created when polar opposites happened came into play. Without opposites there could not be any change is as the theory goes. You can not take the good without taking the bad. I think i'm pretty text book correct to say this is a truth of the Tao. So basically to sum this all up. if you accept good, you must accept that bad could befall you. You can not welcome good into your house unless you can let go of the the good when bad comes knocking. I guess if your already in a relationship the best thing to do is just go along for the ride welcoming the good. When nothing is else is left. It is then time to let go of the good.