The Conflict of Perspectives: the society vs the I ?

[Shad282]

it is been a time since i awakened out of conditioned mind and noticed the reality and what the mind making me see and what the reality actually is.

 

but  whenever i increase my awareness, focus and mindfulness... a trigger reappears and drag me down to the conditioned mind and the misery airse back but in a deep sad way.

 

recently, i m noticing the moment before falling into the mind and become a follower and loosing my awareness of the now and the present moment and dwell in mind and stories...

 

i feel myself standing on the edge between 2 perspectives... perceptive of everything great and wow vibrant and such and another "social" perspective of sadness of seeing what really is and how the world is in a sad way.

 

lets call one the social perspective and the higher perspective.... the social perspective attract me into it.. by saying lets be real.. society is like that and they see you this way.. and u are this and that ... and what u believe in is bullshit ... etc .etc.

This social perspective was raised by society and people, values and such.. and they lead to beliefs in me about myself and about life that serve no purpose and actually hinder and make me struggle in my life.

 

 the higher perspective gets me into it ... when i  focus and allow the "social" perspective to be.. it is great and vibrant the life become, but  it never lasts ... i m always switching in and out of them.

 

There is like an inner conflict between me awakening and trying to manage my life and myself in beliefs that serves my improvement and the other thoughts and beliefs that are conditioned by society and people, culture...

 

the question is how to Merge them ? or how to break free of those social/cultural beliefs implemented in my subconscious ?

 

Thank you! 

[Marblehead]

My opinion only:

 

The two cannot be merged.  You are talking about non-dual but really there is the Mystery and the Manifest.

 

The best we can do is to remain balanced.  I like to say we should harmonize the two.

 

Just the fact that you have observed this condition suggests to me that you are already in a safe place. 

[roger]

it is been a time since i awakened out of conditioned mind and noticed the reality and what the mind making me see and what the reality actually is.

 

but  whenever i increase my awareness, focus and mindfulness... a trigger reappears and drag me down to the conditioned mind and the misery airse back but in a deep sad way.

 

recently, i m noticing the moment before falling into the mind and become a follower and loosing my awareness of the now and the present moment and dwell in mind and stories...

 

i feel myself standing on the edge between 2 perspectives... perceptive of everything great and wow vibrant and such and another "social" perspective of sadness of seeing what really is and how the world is in a sad way.

 

lets call one the social perspective and the higher perspective.... the social perspective attract me into it.. by saying lets be real.. society is like that and they see you this way.. and u are this and that ... and what u believe in is bullshit ... etc .etc.

This social perspective was raised by society and people, values and such.. and they lead to beliefs in me about myself and about life that serve no purpose and actually hinder and make me struggle in my life.

 

 the higher perspective gets me into it ... when i  focus and allow the "social" perspective to be.. it is great and vibrant the life become, but  it never lasts ... i m always switching in and out of them.

 

There is like an inner conflict between me awakening and trying to manage my life and myself in beliefs that serves my improvement and the other thoughts and beliefs that are conditioned by society and people, culture...

 

the question is how to Merge them ? or how to break free of those social/cultural beliefs implemented in my subconscious ?

 

Thank you! 

 

Your words remind me of something Chogyam Trungpa said: "The enlightened mentality is the inspiration for the samsaric mentality; the conflict between the enlightened mentality and the samsaric mentality is the inspiration for the bohdisattva mentality; and the samsaric mentality is the inspiration for the enlightened mentality."

 

It seems that you're a true bohdisattva. The conflict between truth and illusion is your inspiration.

 

Ultimately, you have to see truth as truth, and illusion as illusion. You will still be aware of the illusion, but you won't believe that it's real.

 

Btw I'm not implying that I've accomplished this yet, just saying what I feel the solution to your problem is.

[Shad282]

Your words remind me of something Chogyam Trungpa said: "The enlightened mentality is the inspiration for the samsaric mentality; the conflict between the enlightened mentality and the samsaric mentality is the inspiration for the bohdisattva mentality; and the samsaric mentality is the inspiration for the enlightened mentality."

 

It seems that you're a true bohdisattva. The conflict between truth and illusion is your inspiration.

 

Ultimately, you have to see truth as truth, and illusion as illusion. You will still be aware of the illusion, but you won't believe that it's real.

 

Btw I'm not implying that I've accomplished this yet, just saying what I feel the solution to your problem is.

oh i see... yeah i feel that there is a split between the identity that has the beliefs and illusions set by the society and my awakening state of realising that these are illusions and noticing mind patterns in me and others....

 

I m trying to find a way to move into that awareness perspective all the time and be there maybe by merging the other or by finding a way so i won't get triggered into the state of illusions and not beneficial beliefs to my journey. I can feel that conflict inside of me between these 2 views... each one of them accuse the other for being not realistic and illusory.. hehehe.

 

but i deeply know the truth.