3bob Posted August 5, 2016 (edited) The silent treatment: when practiced by many people it often cruel or hurtful, when practiced by a true guru it can bring a revelation that speaks volumes, for the guru's heart can never be cruel or hurtful in the same sense... your experiences along this line? (and I know there is that Buddhist saying about not accepting something from someone and then who does it belong to, but that is far easier said than done for most of us) Edited August 5, 2016 by 3bob Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Marblehead Posted August 5, 2016 Looks like you have received the silent treatment for this post so far so I will adjust that. But really, silence is sometimes better than words. I have known situations such that no matter how I would have responded it would have only made the situation worse. Yes, the silence of a wise man is different from what you are speaking to. The silence of someone we need input from can be cruel and hurtful. But then, this need could be considered a destructive attachment or even an ego problem. I have no idea where you want to go with this so I will stop now. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
3bob Posted August 5, 2016 Thanks for the reply MH. This can go anywhere folks may want to take it or how they may want to comment on it... being that there are several aspects to it. For instance: one is that if we get the silent treatment from someone then it is not uncommon to give it back and that could said to be a negative type stalemate along with the possibility of it devolving further, which could mean that if someone is unreasonably ignored and treated as if there voice means nothing then they might not walk away calm, collected and unattached. (some of which we see in the news everyday) Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Marblehead Posted August 5, 2016 Yeah, what you just said is what I feel is at the root of the problems between the Israelis and the Palestinians. They are giving each other the silent treatment. Each side has demanded total submission but neither side is willing to toward a more centered perspective. Same thing happens in marriages and other forms of relationships. A disagreement is had, both hold firm and won't even talk about it without total submission from the other. This leads to isolation and from that point there is no reason to remain together. But then I will admit that there have been times when someone made a statement or asked a question that I felt was out of place or none of their business and I just remained silent. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Geof Nanto Posted August 5, 2016 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Kpa9LtunUcg "Atmosphere" - Joy Division Walk in silence, Don't walk away, in silence. See the danger, Always danger, Endless talking, Life rebuilding, Don't walk away. Walk in silence, Don't turn away, in silence. Your confusion, My illusion, Worn like a mask of self-hate, Confronts and then dies. Don't walk away. People like you find it easy, Naked to see, Walking on air. Hunting by the rivers, Through the streets, Every corner abandoned too soon, Set down with due care. Don't walk away, in silence, Don't walk away. 2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
3bob Posted August 6, 2016 "...But then I will admit that there have been times when someone made a statement or asked a question that I felt was out of place or none of their business and I just remained silent." by MH a good point which is often the best course to follow which btw. reminds me of TTC, chapter 8: "...If you do not strive with others you will be free of blame" 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
3bob Posted August 7, 2016 yea, in relationships I'd rather have someone mad and expressing it compared to the silent treatment, for instance if my wife gives me the silent treatment then I'm or we're probably in much worse trouble ;-) I also know that silence in a passive aggressive variation does not work well for either party 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Marblehead Posted August 7, 2016 I'm sure I have mentioned this before but I don't mind repeating myself: I used to be a silent one. Kept my emotions inside. That's not a good condition. I changed my behavior and started expressing how others were effecting me, both positive and negative. Doing so has at least given me inner peace and has at least let the other know how I feel. It is far easier to discuss disagreements when we set aside our emotions and ego. 2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
