The now is scary

[sketchbo0k]

Peace,

 

I began zazen recently and I'm currently having a very difficult time accepting the mental power of 'the now'. I am constantly stopping mental chatter and unawareness. I'm living in the now and it feels very different, as if I am in a dream. The concentration is very powerful. During my prayers I am more involved and not in thought like I previously was.

 

this is great, but it is a bit scary. Is this an effect of 'waking up'? 

 

Edit: i am also getting very emotional about it. In some of my sittings I feel extremely angry, sad or even want to cry. And I currently feel like crying for some reason

Edited June 12, 2017 by sketchbo0k

[Fa Xin]

It's a lot different than living in your head!

 

emotions will come up, it may be that your letting go of old things. 

 

Just know that emotions will come and go, just like everything else. It's all impermanent. 

 

Focus on relaxing, knowing that whatever your experiencing is okay to experience. 

[RiverSnake]

Just detoxing and adjusting. Keep going at a moderate pace and these things usually work themselves out. 

Edited June 12, 2017 by OldSaint

[qicat]

46 minutes ago, sketchbo0k said:

Peace,

 

I began zazen recently and I'm currently having a very difficult time accepting the mental power of 'the now'. I am constantly stopping mental chatter and unawareness. I'm living in the now and it feels very different, as if I am in a dream. The concentration is very powerful. During my prayers I am more involved and not in thought like I previously was.

 

this is great, but it is a bit scary. Is this an effect of 'waking up'? 

 

Edit: i am also getting very emotional about it. In some of my sittings I feel extremely angry, sad or even want to cry. And I currently feel like crying for some reason

nah

you are fine

right on track

 

p.s. if you want to cry, cry, don't hold it. Cry and be in the "now"... 

[Aetherous]

Emotions come and go like clouds in the clear blue sky.

[Marblehead]

2 hours ago, Aetherous said:

Emotions come and go like clouds in the clear blue sky.

As long as we allow them.  Grabbing hold of them will mess you up big time.

 

[dwai]

On 6/12/2017 at 0:26 PM, sketchbo0k said:

Peace,

 

I began zazen recently and I'm currently having a very difficult time accepting the mental power of 'the now'. I am constantly stopping mental chatter and unawareness. I'm living in the now and it feels very different, as if I am in a dream. The concentration is very powerful. During my prayers I am more involved and not in thought like I previously was.

 

this is great, but it is a bit scary. Is this an effect of 'waking up'? 

 

Edit: i am also getting very emotional about it. In some of my sittings I feel extremely angry, sad or even want to cry. And I currently feel like crying for some reason

So do what you feel like doing and be done. Then go back to witnessing, being in the present. Yes everything is a dream...so if you feel like you're in a dream, is because you are waking up to reality.

 

[Jeff]

On 6/12/2017 at 0:26 PM, sketchbo0k said:

Peace,

 

I began zazen recently and I'm currently having a very difficult time accepting the mental power of 'the now'. I am constantly stopping mental chatter and unawareness. I'm living in the now and it feels very different, as if I am in a dream. The concentration is very powerful. During my prayers I am more involved and not in thought like I previously was.

 

this is great, but it is a bit scary. Is this an effect of 'waking up'? 

 

Edit: i am also getting very emotional about it. In some of my sittings I feel extremely angry, sad or even want to cry. And I currently feel like crying for some reason

 

Hi sketchbook,

 

This is because you have reached the stage where you are starting to connect (and feel) energetically your surroundings. But, at the moment you are more subconsciously focused on the "receptive" side of the energy flows. The emotional impact is greater as you are sensing all of the surrounding energies and it resonates with some of your deeper issues and fears. Maybe think of it like have greatly expanded the range of your "pendulum", but it is kind of stuck on one side. Another way to think of it is that you are receiving more outside energies, but not also letting them go/flow through (transmitting).

 

Best,

Jeff