New here, hello, really need advice how to handle those things

[Banana357]

Hey guys, exited to be here, very interesting forum, I have been reading some threads and wanted to join because I have all sorts of questions

My thread goes longer so I write different sections if you want to skip

Long story short, I am looking for help regarding the process I am going through right now, not any sort of "please help me or I kill myself help" but some practical advice from experienced people to help me with the process I am going through right now

 

personal story

 

(past)

some sort of event, read on the internet and in books many would say some spiritual awakening like 6 or 7 years ago

with no preparation for that at all and not being spiritual to that time in terms of reading literature of that sort or doing any sort of spiritual practice, it just happened by reaching all my life goals and being depressed by it because I was very sad, happiness seemed not being reachable didn't matter how much I tried, I was far from home, a book I was reading at the time basically came down to the question of who am I, what is my inner core, when I was so sad because my logical thinking has let me to that point and I wasn't happy so I thought damn you logical thinking, thanks for that.

I just let go and then it happened

state of bliss for weeks, everything easy, I had everything I needed, it was magic, extreme knowledge and stuff

after that I jumped back into my old life and somehow my old conditions came back and then I was trapped in all sorts of things.

It has been for years and at some point I got really depressed, actually at several points, I couldnt get back to this feeling, sometimes 

I got there but it faded again.

 

(last few months)

I am going through a very hefty psych therapy right now. It is awesome and helps me on so many levels, it literally destroys all sorts of fears and stuff, feeling of I am getting free and more and more independent. In retrospect I really was depressed and adopted a lifestyle of slowly killing myself by not caring on health anymore.

So basically what happens is I am exploring everything there is inside of me and go through all the emotions I can find but it can be hard sometimes, I cry and scream and stuff, all part of the therapy

I am also working at home on going deeper 

 

conditions

due to not enough sleep the last 18 months or so feeling tired, even got my first grey hairs, 20 or something, I am 33

Sugar addiction, very hard one, I have been eating a lot of it for the past 2 or 3 years

Doctor said I am fine, only my immune system is weak, no Diabetes or something, but I feel if I wouldn't have made this therapy

I would get some serious conditions in 1 or 2 years or something

feeling very weak all the time in general, feeling of not being able to lift anything, it is like being separated from my strength because I feel

it is there, at least more than I feel right now.

bad posture

lots of sadness, couldnt even watch sad movies or news or something

had a ton of stress, not anymore

cold hands and feet very often, improving now

tons of time in front of the computer, improving now as well

lots of nausea, gets stronger with burping

Kundalini teacher and psych therapist both say I need more grounding

super weak hara centre, I am thin and flexing my muscles I have a sixpack, not due to tons of training but vegetarian diet for 7 years and also my body doesn't accumulate much fat at all, but the point is, this area feels superweak, like a finger could pierce it through

very sensitive to peoples emotions, dependency to give in to negative emotions of others fades due to therapy.

developed an allergy, dry skin at the eyes, 1,5 years, we had 2 cats for almost 3 years now, my mother has a strong cat allergy, tests say I do not have any sort of allergy, doctor cannot say anything helpful here

 

practicing nofap due to this therapy, no problem anymore with this.

I had 2 orgasms in the last 60+ days, none due to masturbation. as I said I am 33 so having tons of orgasms wouldn't be a problem

the psych therapy and nofap and some Kundaliniyoga push my energy through my body upwards it seems

it started in the first chakra as a warm circling feeling, had some sensations at the second chakra and the third one takes some time right now. Felt increased activity there, sounds and stuff for quite some time.

I have some hefty blockage in my chest area. got through it a few times now, cried a lot and stuff when it happened and then it came back

I cannot take a deep breath without burping, burping like a crazy person, all the time, when doing Qigong it is extreme, at least 200 times in less than 10 minutes last time.

coughing now and then, spitting slime same as with a flew, but there is none...

 

I feel like interests change and stuff fades away

less interested in reading, I have read a ton of spiritual literature since the event happened, so basically I am in the head very hard right now. I am going through all sort of layers now. 

 

So what to do now? I am to weak for Kundaliniyoga all the time. Also it drags me to "soft" stuff like Qigong, I know it can be superhard, but

the movements are so soft, it just feels right.
 

I am trying to learn Yi Jin Jing from a DVD and a book right.

Also have a book on Zhan Zhuang, but not doing anything with it right now.

I did yang style taichi for almost 1,5 years but never learned the whole form, but somehow I dont connect with it.

 

any recommendations from you guys in terms of what to learn, what to do or whatever?

Thank you sincerely

 

Cheers 

 

edit1: grammar & added symptoms

edit2: more symptoms

Edited October 25, 2017 by Banana357

[Marblehead]

Hello, Banana357 and welcome.

 

Your membership is approved and we're happy you found your way to us. We look forward to accompanying you on some of the way that you still have to go.

 

Please take the time to read the post pinned at the top of this Welcome page and take a look at the forum Terms and Rules.   This covers all you need to know when getting started.

 

For the first week you will be restricted to ten posts per day but after that you can post as much as you like. Also, until you’ve posted fifteen times in the forums, you’ll be a “Junior Bum” with somewhat restricted access and will be allowed only two private messages per day.

 

Good luck in your pursuits and best wishes to you,

 

Marblehead and the TDB team

 

 

Hi Banana,

 

Yes, that is a bunch of bananas.  I wonder if you are seeking to be someone else or just develop who you really are.  I'm sure you will find many to speak with you concerning your conditions.

 

You are welcome to jump right in ongoing discussions, revive an older thread, start a new thread of your own, or start a discussion in the "Newcomer Corner" sub-forms to expand on your introduction or ask general questions to help you get started.

 

May you enjoy your time here.

 

Marblehead

[Mudfoot]

Yo Banana! 

 

You might find that a standing qigong with more focus on the physical movement (rather than a focus on energy)  lays a really good foundation for emotional work,  including self-image, agency, and all the other terms popular within the psych circles. 

 

Taiji is usually too complicated in the beginning to get these results, and starting with kundalini based stuff might really strain your emotions, making the ride harder. 

 

But then again, some like it the hard way. 

[Lost in Translation]

Welcome!

 

I don't have any advise, but I do respect your candor. It takes courage to be honest like that, even on a mostly anonymous forum.

[Banana357]

Hey guys, thanks for the replies!

Keep it coming

 

@Marblehead 

dont know, I hope to get to my inner core, release and live my potential, I try to be honest to myself and others about it, progression in therapy demands it, I am sick of myself the way I am right now, trying to integrate everything that hasn't been looked at for so long

 

@Mudfoot

which kind of standing Qigong are you thinking of? Should I try Zhan Zhuang? This is mostly standing right?

usually I love the hard way but I am exhausted somehow, I also need some alternative for the weak days

 

@Lost in Translation

thx mate, I appreciate!

 

 

 

[RiverSnake]

Welcome to TDB. Sounds like your body is processing a great deal of energies. A useful trick i use to tell me where i need to go: 

 

Ask yourself this: "What questions do i need to be asking?" (then ask those questions). This can give indications of useful trajectories for your path.  

 

The goal is to get a response from the intuitive mind rather than the monkey mind. The monkey will always deceive you while the spontaneous answers will guide you towards fresh water on the path. Hope this helps, cheers. 

Edited October 25, 2017 by WayofChi

[thelerner]

Welcome, here are my thoughts.

 

In my opinion there is fundamental work that comes before energy and psychological work.  In this case Get some Sleep.  A regular sleep pattern established.  How.. well you got the internet, look around see what makes sense and try a few things, experiment until you get regular, which might take weeks or months.   Check your diet too, being vegetarian is great but make sure you're getting good nutrition, nothing fancy, super foods and whatnot but good fats, enough protein etc., 

 

Allergies are draining, find pills that help, keep the cats out of your bed room, get an air cleaner etc.,  

 

I've seen high level practitioners who burp like mad when they meditate so I don't know if that means anything.  There are many meditation apps out there that set breathing patterns.   Its nice to start short like 5 or 6 breathing in same number breathing out and over time work up.  Slow breathing leads to relaxed mind and body. 

 

Mentally seems like you need to not worry so much.  Easy, hard.. it's all just life.  I'd recommend listening to a dharma(wisdom) talk every now and then.  Look up Infinite smile (http://www.infinitesmile.org/) podcasts or something similar.  There are dozens of them, soothing wisdom. 

 

I collect guided meditations.  When I'm out of sort I'll listen to something like Kim Walsh https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=veETG-PczWk turning it into an mp3 for listening or something else uplifting. 

 

Lastly in fundamentals don't forget the value of connecting to other people.  It's good that you're here but also make time with friends and/or new things and classes, from group meditation to beginning guitar and billiards, 2 things I'm working on now. 

 

 

 

 

 

[Limahong]

20 hours ago, Banana357 said:

Hey guys, exited to be here, very interesting forum, I have been reading some threads and wanted to join because I have all sorts of questions

My thread goes longer so I write different sections if you want to skip

Long story short, I am looking for help regarding the process I am going through right now, not any sort of "please help me or I kill myself help" but some practical advice from experienced people to help me with the process I am going through right now

 

Hi Banana357,

 

You seem to know yourself pretty well - but need to sort yourself out. For one who can write the way you do, I am sure you can help yourself.

 

Quote

 

personal story

 

(past)

some sort of event, read on the internet and in books many would say some spiritual awakening like 6 or 7 years ago

with no preparation for that at all and not being spiritual to that time in terms of reading literature of that sort or doing any sort of spiritual practice, it just happened by reaching all my life goals and being depressed by it because I was very sad, happiness seemed not being reachable didn't matter how much I tried, I was far from home, a book I was reading at the time basically came down to the question of who am I, what is my inner core, when I was so sad because my logical thinking has let me to that point and I wasn't happy so I thought damn you logical thinking, thanks for that.

I just let go and then it happened

 

I went through a similar phase. I was logical and philosophical to my own detriment. But "thanks for that ... I just let go and then it happened" - it happened to me too.

 

Quote

state of bliss for weeks, everything easy, I had everything I needed, it was magic, extreme knowledge and stuff

after that I jumped back into my old life and somehow my old conditions came back and then I was trapped in all sorts of things.

It has been for years and at some point I got really depressed, actually at several points, I couldn't get back to this feeling, sometimes 

I got there but it faded again.

 

I am now hearing some similar bells ringing.

 

Quote

 

(last few months)

I am going through a very hefty psych therapy right now. It is awesome and helps me on so many levels, it literally destroys all sorts of fears and stuff, feeling of I am getting free and more and more independent. In retrospect I really was depressed and adopted a lifestyle of slowly killing myself by not caring on health anymore.

So basically what happens is I am exploring everything there is inside of me and go through all the emotions I can find but it can be hard sometimes, I cry and scream and stuff, all part of the therapy

I am also working at home on going deeper 

 

You appeared to be destroying yourself; yet you are recreating yourself. Creative destruction? You are in the middle of a ying/yang limbo?

 

Quote

conditions

due to not enough sleep the last 18 months or so feeling tired, even got my first grey hairs, 20 or something, I am 33

Sugar addiction, very hard one, I have been eating a lot of it for the past 2 or 3 years

Doctor said I am fine, only my immune system is weak, no Diabetes or something, but I feel if I wouldn't have made this therapy

I would get some serious conditions in 1 or 2 years or something

feeling very weak all the time in general, feeling of not being able to lift anything, it is like being separated from my strength because I feel

it is there, at least more than I feel right now.

bad posture

lots of sadness, couldnt even watch sad movies or news or something

had a ton of stress, not anymore

cold hands and feet very often, improving now

tons of time in front of the computer, improving now as well

lots of nausea, gets stronger with burping

 

Good for you. You are keeping track of your self. You are very insightful. A self acknowledging fighter.

 

Quote

Kundalini teacher and psych therapist both say I need more grounding

super weak hara centre, I am thin and flexing my muscles I have a sixpack, not due to tons of training but vegetarian diet for 7 years and also my body doesn't accumulate much fat at all, but the point is, this area feels superweak, like a finger could pierce it through

very sensitive to peoples emotions, dependency to give in to negative emotions of others fades due to therapy.

developed an allergy, dry skin at the eyes, 1,5 years, we had 2 cats for almost 3 years now, my mother has a strong cat allergy, tests say I do not have any sort of allergy, doctor cannot say anything helpful here

 

Have you self-determined if your Kundalini has awoken?

 

Quote

practicing nofap due to this therapy, no problem anymore with this.

I had 2 orgasms in the last 60+ days, none due to masturbation. as I said I am 33 so having tons of orgasms wouldn't be a problem

 

You were into the conservation of sexual energy? Why?

 

Quote

the psych therapy and nofap and some Kundalini yoga push my energy through my body upwards it seems

it started in the first chakra as a warm circling feeling, had some sensations at the second chakra and the third one takes some time right now. Felt increased activity there, sounds and stuff for quite some time.

I have some hefty blockage in my chest area. got through it a few times now, cried a lot and stuff when it happened and then it came back

I cannot take a deep breath without burping, burping like a crazy person, all the time, when doing Qigong it is extreme, at least 200 times in less than 10 minutes last time.

 

Again Kundalini.

 

Quote

coughing now and then, spitting slime same as with a flew, but there is none...

 

I feel like interests change and stuff fades away

less interested in reading, I have read a ton of spiritual literature since the event happened, so basically I am in the head very hard right now. I am going through all sort of layers now. 

 

So what to do now? I am to weak for Kundalini yoga all the time. Also it drags me to "soft" stuff like Qigong, I know it can be superhard, but

the movements are so soft, it just feels right.

 

I am trying to learn Yi Jin Jing from a DVD and a book right.

Also have a book on Zhan Zhuang, but not doing anything with it right now.

I did yang style taichi for almost 1,5 years but never learned the whole form, but somehow I dont connect with it.

 

any recommendations from you guys in terms of what to learn, what to do or whatever?

Thank you sincerely

Cheers 

 

Develop your mind. Listen to your body. One step back, two steps forward. Be humble and helpful to others. Impermanence. Middle path. Laugh. Sunshine and rain. Experiential learning. No pain, no gain. Simplicity. Wu wei.  ....

 

Banana357 - you are apparently doing great. Carry on checking yourself. Be patient. Be a nobody.

 

- LimA

Edited October 25, 2017 by Limahong
Enhance ...

[Mudfoot]

10 hours ago, Banana357 said:

 

 

@Mudfoot

which kind of standing Qigong are you thinking of? Should I try Zhan Zhuang? This is mostly standing right?

usually I love the hard way but I am exhausted somehow, I also need some alternative for the weak days

I wouldn't start with zz. 

Your emotions are motivating you to move. So find some easy movements to start with. In general,  you might want to experiment with approach/withdrawal and opening/closing. 

But,  as many are fond to say here, these are the principles, but you need a method and preferably a guide if you want to approach your emotions in a nice way. 

Gung-ho will probably not be the efficient way to proceed, at least not in my experience, at least not in the beginning. If you save energy the strong days, there is more left to work with you on the weak days. 

[Banana357]

thank you all so much for those replies, very kind of you, I really need to improve and try a lot of that!

 

@WayofChi

really interesting technique, I will give it a try, thx

 

@thelernen

ye you are right with the sleep, got to do that!

about nutrition, any more specific advice? I mean easy to cook recipes or something, a site you can recommend?

there are so many different systems out there, dont know which one to follow

thx for the rest as well! tried apps, will try the talks, need to learn guitar too
 

@Limahong

thx for this detailed reply!

Quote

You appeared to be destroying yourself; yet you are recreating yourself. Creative destruction? You are in the middle of a ying/yang limbo?

nothing creative there, in hindsight I was just depressive and didn't want to see some things, now I am coming back

 

Quote

Have you self-determined if your Kundalini has awoken?

Actually I was just doing stuff, Kundalini yoga felt right to me and now different stuff happens, but process is slow and not overwhelming right now.

 

Quote

You were into the conservation of sexual energy? Why?

actually sadness I guess, I dont want to be so dependent on sex anymore. it is all so sad. I would love to be in a fullfilling relationship with sex and stuff, but somehow me and my girlfriend cannot manage to do that. dont know if this gets better.

I used prostitutes and felt ashamed for that, we have a little child, I love it, there is a feeling of not being able to leave now.

I am sick of how Sex is such an important part of my life, also I want to use those energies for healing purposes

but probably my thinking is wrong on the lifestuff here. part of the therapy is to figure it all out i guess, walk through this hell of emotions waiting for me in this corner

Thank you Lima!

 

@Mudfoot

so any further qigong recommendations?

you are probably right, I need to save life energy, trained kundaliniyoga too hard today, got dizzy...

 

Thank you all for the comments guys! 

[thelerner]

10 minutes ago, Banana357 said:

thank you all so much for those replies, very kind of you, I really need to improve and try a lot of that!

 

@thelernen

about nutrition, any more specific advice? I mean easy to cook recipes or something, a site you can recommend?

there are so many different systems out there, dont know which one to follow

thx for the rest as well! tried apps, will try the talks, need to learn guitar too

 

These days I don't have any nutritional 'systems', I probably don't have the self discipline for them.  Rather I do recipes.  Finding ones I like and making them my own.  All the better if they're healthy and well rounded, plus its nice to have a big pot of something in the fridge.  So I'll spend a month or two on chili, bone broth, paleo chocolate desserts or cassoulet..   

 

The internet probably has almost as many recipes as it does porn, so if you're interested in anything, take a look at some recipes and go for it, experiment.. make'em your own.   I blog about my cooking hopes and dreams here: 

 

[Limahong]

5 hours ago, Banana357 said:

nothing creative there, in hindsight I was just depressive and didn't want to see some things, now I am coming back

 

Good morning Banana357,

 

Let's cut to the chase. You are bright and breeze - made for greater things. Why are you 'coming back'?

 

5 hours ago, Banana357 said:

Actually I was just doing stuff, Kundalini yoga felt right to me and now different stuff happens, but process is slow and not overwhelming right now.

 

Have you thought of this - Kundalini is seeking you out not vice versa? If so, you patiently embrace 'K' like a novice? A nobody?

 

5 hours ago, Banana357 said:

actually sadness I guess, I dont want to be so dependent on sex anymore. it is all so sad. I would love to be in a fulfilling relationship with sex and stuff, but somehow me and my girlfriend cannot manage to do that. dont know if this gets better.

 

Sex misunderstood = sadness? You have thought of  sex as 'fulfilling' - so why are you sad? 'Don't know if this gets better' - sure it will but you...

 

5 hours ago, Banana357 said:

I used prostitutes and felt ashamed for that

 

'Prostitutes' are not for using. They are human beings in the first instance. Do you still visit them? If not, it is water under the bridge and shame had flowed on and washed...

 

5 hours ago, Banana357 said:

we have a little child, I love it, there is a feeling of not being able to leave now.

 

Great that you love the child! Whose the mother? 'There is a feeling of not being able to leave now' - what do you mean?

 

5 hours ago, Banana357 said:

I am sick of how Sex is such an important part of my life, also I want to use those energies for healing purposes

but probably my thinking is wrong on the lifestuff here. part of the therapy is to figure it all out i guess, walk through this hell of emotions waiting for me in this corner

 

Work on your mind. At one stage in my life I was told this - the mind is the biggest sex organ.

Don't ask me why. Use your mind to work this out. It is 'waiting for me in this corner'.

 

Don't keep your mind waiting. I know you will not. Why?

You are bright and breezy!

 

- LimA

Edited October 27, 2017 by Limahong
Enhance ...

[moment]

Banana357,

 

If you are not keeping a detailed journal, start one right away.  Make it more detailed as you go on.  Do not try to focus on too many things.  Deconstruct down to very few and get the balance of them.  Then add single items cautiously.  Healing yourself is where true power lies.  My thoughts are with you.

[Mudfoot]

10 hours ago, Banana357 said:

 

@Mudfoot

so any further qigong recommendations?

You know how it is with methods. 

 

Marblehead likes the method of no method, I only like what I do,  and there is a traditional discussion here on TDB on the subject of level zero dead-end practices 

[Spotless]

You stated that you have a hard core sugar addiction - for the past 2-3 years.

 

You need to end this and along with it stimulants.

 

In exchange eat decent food - not synthetic heavily processed food with lots of sugars and salt.

 

- 

 

After at least 4-6 months you will be at a good starting point for some of the other parts of the story. It all fell radically apart at "hard core sugar addiction".  In "hard core sugar addiction" your afflictions are pretty much exactly what one might expect and they will not change much accept for the worse.

 

Stay away from Kundalini Yoga until you have rectifi d the sugar intake problem - in fact it would be advisable to consider simple physical workouts and meditation - no moving forms for a bit.

 

A hard core sugar addiction is like a full time alcoholic on a drip - you are not looking at anything straight.

 

All the best!

[Limahong]

3 hours ago, moment said:

If you are not keeping a detailed journal, start one right away.  Make it more detailed as you go on.

 

Hi moment,

Very good suggestion re a detailed journal. By putting pen to paper we can also be more reflective. Such a journal provides a framework for temporal comparison/progress.  It will keep banana357 in good stead as he writes well and is re-collective. 

 

I kept one when I was at the nascent phase of my '100 days jing => chi => shen' journey. It gave me a feeling of good 'control' over the unknown. I was relaxed as I could free my mind - the faintest ink is stronger than the strongest memory.

 

3 hours ago, moment said:

Do not try to focus on too many things.  Deconstruct down to very few and get the balance of them.  Then add single items cautiously. 

 

Yes. Try and differentiate the primaries from the secondaries. Prioritize the primaries. Balance the prioritized primaries by understanding their inter-connectivity. Step by step with caution.

 

3 hours ago, moment said:

Healing yourself is where true power lies.  My thoughts are with you.

 

Great encouraging words. TDB will rise with you as a member. 

 

A great weekend.

 

- LimA

[moment]

On 10/27/2017 at 2:52 AM, Limahong said:

.

 

 

Yes. Try and differentiate the primaries from the secondaries. Prioritize the primaries. Balance the prioritized primaries by understanding their inter-connectivity. Step by step with caution.

 

Yes!

Edited December 23, 2017 by moment
typo

[Limahong]

There are some commonalities between banana357 and Zlogic (from another thread)?

 

Salutations from a Western student

Started by ZLogic, 21 hours ago

Edited October 29, 2017 by Limahong
Enhance ...

[Limahong]

If there are commonalities, banana357 and ZLogic listen to this silence:

 

THE SILENCE OF YOUR BODY + MIND

 

- LimA

[Banana357]

Hey guys, thanks again for sharing!

My work is consuming me and I try to get more sleep, thus the later answer

btw, adreanl fatigue seems to be a good term to describe my condition, at least a huge part of it

 

@thelerner

ok I will check thanks
 

@Limahong

Quote

Why are you 'coming back'?

1 To be the best possible father I can be

2 Therapy has invoked the wish in myself to find and live my potential, whatever that means

 

Quote

Have you thought of this - Kundalini is seeking you out not vice versa? If so, you patiently embrace 'K' like a novice? A nobody?

 

Ye I need to chill about that, it just happens or doesnt. Right now I just to get some sleep, more than usual

I had a kundalini session a few days ago which literally depleted all my energy, I was capable of doing much more than usual and now I am tired 

 

Quote

Sex misunderstood = sadness? You have thought of  sex as 'fulfilling' - so why are you sad? 'Don't know if this gets better' - sure it will but you...

 

There is so much sadness in the past, how the things went, and somehow for some reason on rare ocasions this sadness comes up, right now when I am typing it is here, I try to look at it without changing it.

 

Quote

'Prostitutes' are not for using. They are human beings in the first instance. Do you still visit them? If not, it is water under the bridge and shame had flowed on and washed...

 

ye of course, just a term I used, met some wonderful people there, and the answer is I dont know, right now no, in a month? maybe? lets see how things turn out.

 

Quote

Work on your mind. 

 

how exactly? reading? Zazen? Meditation? anything else?

I will also read into the thread you mentioned.

thank you!

 

@moment

I did for some time, how exactly regarding few things and stuff, any examples`?

my life seems to be too full right now, I am trying to get stuff out, you are right about that, helps a lot, and thx! 

@Mudfoot

ok I need to check that, I dont understand yet

@Spotless

ye but any tricks on that? This is hard, I am improving but I dont know to be honest, now and then it hits me pretty hard.

Therapy seems to help as well, Sadness and stress bring me there

any practice to balance out cravings or something?
 

Thanks guys!

so nr 1 priority is sleep right no

nr 2 is order around me

other important things are in no particular order

cleaning my inner house and watch what else is there, sugar addiction because I dont know how to take it full front,

exercise here and there, 

 

thanks guys! I will reread all of it as soon as possible and try to improve.

all the best to you

 

 

 

[Limahong]

19 minutes ago, Banana357 said:

so nr 1 priority is sleep right no nr 2 is order around me

 

Hi Banana357,

 

But of course. SLEEP as much as needed and order will turn around.

 

I am going to sleep myself - it is now approaching 4 am at my end.

 

Good night.

 

- LimA

 

[Kar3n]

Welcome, @Banana357. 

 

Your screen name reminds me of a local act in Phoenix.

 

Banana Gun

[ZLogic]

Hi Banana,

 

Welcome! Like Lima once said, this is a journey and I'm glad you're on your way!

Some points from your posts:

Maybe give up the vegetarian diet? It can lead to weakness and sensitivity. We should treat animals better, but tribes and shamans understand that giving animals a humane death when the time is right is better than a slow death in old age or from another predator. 

 

Burping is good! It's a sign that things are moving and readjusting for the better.

 

Forget about Kundalini.  Maybe some of your practices aren't right for you. Kundalini comes only when it decides. If you'd like to rouse Kundalini safely, bota.org offers a course of meditations that awakens it safely. This will also help you work on your mind.

 

SLEEP ALL THE TIME.  Seriously. Forget everything else and just sleep. Nothing else is as important as your health and how you feel inside. It will make you productive.

 

The rare sadness that comes up might be repression.  Face it, don't sweep it under the rug. Become the sadness for a time. It has a lesson to teach you that you haven't learned yet. Then remind yourself of your great qualities.

Posture is super important! Just be happy every time you remind yourself, and it will correct over months.

[Banana357]

Hey guys,

 

sorry for the late respond, I am working a lot right now and also try to get more sleep than usual.

thx for all of your replies!

 

@Limahong 

ye  I will do thanks, why so late? 4 a.m.? nightowl?
 

@Kar3n

thx

 

@Zlogic

valid points with the vegetarian diet, but I will try everything else first

the burping is making me crazy because it doesnt stop, it has been like this for months now.

I even wake up with nausea the last few days.

I dont try to force the kundalini, I just like kundalini yoga because it feels right, I love the dynamic of it, the movement and also

that I can do anything from the get go, not after 1 year of bending and strengthening bodyparts.

Also it was just some observation, a feeling and other sensations, that my chakras seem to open or something, I simply felt stuff there and when I think about the chakras I can see changes in my life regarding to every single one of them

in terms of the sadness and stuff, ye I try not to avoid it as much as possible, also in therapy and due to it,

there is so much stuff in my life I have to deal with right now that I cannot overdo that because that process is exhausting, 

it literally is draining me of my little energy, I really think I have adrenal fatigue right now, trying to fix that as well.

I am going to sleep soon  

also quite a story you have, I have gone through your thread, I see similarities between what you have written and my story,

very interesting, will observe

I dont want to comment much on this, because I really dont have any valueable things to say besides: cool that you are here and working on your stuff, awesome community has a new member. 

 

Cheers guys