Reasons why I left the church

[TheCLounge]

I grew up in a family of missionaries. At a young age I was dedicated  to serving others and people in my community. I come from a poor neighborhood that was full of issues.

 

My parents loved me deeply. They taught me spiritual matters as a child. My younger days was full of culture, history and music. I was very creative and I was always doing stuff to stimulate my mind. As I got older I became more aware of certain gifts I knew I had. I'm very clairvoyant and I have gifts in healing. This was passed down to me from my mother. I consider her a physic, but since we came from a Protestant background I just considered her a prophet. Lots of crazy things happened during my childhood and puberty. I remember when I was 13 I woke up and there were spots all over me. The doctor said nothing was wrong with me though. It went away on its own..Also had deep dreams and prophetic moments.

 

My Dad taught me how to conduct myself in the streets. Brooklyn is a rough neighborhood and I always stayed to myself and learned to take care of myself.

 

Growing up I knew that there was more to the Bible than what the European church made it to be. The blonde blue eyed Jesus was a joke to me. I always had a deep interest in science and mysticism. I saw the Bible as a book of mysticism and science. Things changed for me when I turned 16..

 

When I was 16 in the year 2007 something happened to me. It was like a flash of light. Afterwards I became EMPTY. It's weird. I no longer felt separate from God. But I saw God as the "heart" of all things. My life changed forever after that. Religion was something I left. I wanted to return to "the essence". I also began understanding the Bible more. I no longer read it in a religious way. But in a spiritual way.

 

As the years gone by 2012 became another year of spiritual awakening for me. I began feeling sharp pains in my chest and more on the top center of my head. Everytime I went to the hospital the docs would say nothing was wrong with me...but there was. And it was the church.

 

My dad realized that although he respected his religion, the church was taking him away from his "real self". And I was resonating with him. He decided to leave his ministry and seek a genuine life where he was free to be "him".

 

I was at this youth group one night and I disagreed with the teacher there. They claimed that if you committed suicide Jesus would send you to Hell forever. I told him no one can truly die because I AM (God) is the life inside all of us. Death is not a physical matter but a spiritual one that brings rebirth.

 

They KICKED me out...in a heartbeat..in front of everyone lol

 

Later that year in 2012 I left the church completely. And that's when I finally established "my path". My spiritual awareness became better and I began understanding things never before. 

 

Im thankful for the events in my life. I have a deeper connection with my "I Am", and that allows me to connect with everything else because everything is an extension of yourself.

 

Im not bashing religion. I still read and study the Kabbalah, biblical scriptures and other esoteric practices such as numerology, astrology etc. But I believe if it weren't for that, I wouldn't be where I am today. I seek to be EMPTY. I seek to be nothing..

 

We should respect religion because it is a stepping stone for us to bring us back to ourselves. But when the ego becomes too deeply involved we lose track, and all we're left with is a "religion". I hope this has inspired someone

 

 

 

[Lost in Translation]

4 hours ago, TheCLounge said:

We should respect religion because it is a stepping stone for us to bring us back to ourselves. But when the ego becomes too deeply involved we lose track, and all we're left with is a "religion". I hope this has inspired someone

 

Thank you for sharing.

 

Some say that religion is a path, and not a destination. It's easy to confuse the one with the other. I am glad you are reconciling the two. Hopefully in time you will find a new home of like minded people. Until then, you always have us. ;-)

[TheCLounge]

Yes. Religion is a stepping stone to spirituality but it does not define it.

 

Like Jesus said the book of Matthew, some seeds fall on rock instead of good soil. They get choked up after a while. 

 

I believe people who spend years in religion eventually realize that something is "missing". When they first joined their religion they were radical, but as the years passed they began to seek for "more".

[Marblehead]

I do speak negatively of the institutions of religion but try to not do so regarding religion itself.

 

But then, it is difficult for me to defend religious beliefs as I am an Atheist.

 

Yes, I have heard similar histories before.  Perhaps the evolution of the "God" concept.

 

And yes, I have heard too of people replacing their external God with the concept "I Am".

 

I view this as a freeing of the spirit.  It is no longer dependent on something external.

 

[Stosh]

Religions tend to reflect the attitudes of the people in them.

Christianity is big and theres a lot of alternative ways of looking at it. 

Some positives, One can actually read the King James Bible. It has some great messages , language , and history.

It provides a common basis for people to get along, and a social venue.

The 10 commandments are explicit. 

Its inclusive overall, yet one can do the religion ,and have a relationship with a spiritual inspiration, directly.. A relationship with the divine that doesnt need to be mitigated by the interference of anyone else. No one can take that direct communication away, unless you let them. 

Understood to be loving tolerant and knowing what is in your heart at all times anyway,,  I dont think it matters much to him whether you profess as christian at all. 

Edited November 19, 2017 by Stosh

[TheCLounge]

1 hour ago, Marblehead said:

I do speak negatively of the institutions of religion but try to not do so regarding religion itself.

 

But then, it is difficult for me to defend religious beliefs as I am an Atheist.

 

Yes, I have heard similar histories before.  Perhaps the evolution of the "God" concept.

 

And yes, I have heard too of people replacing their external God with the concept "I Am".

 

I view this as a freeing of the spirit.  It is no longer dependent on something external.

 

I say "I AM" because in the Bible that's his name. I don't like saying "God". God is vague and it's merely a title.

 

I AM is personal and it speaks directly to me. That's a whole different discussion though that I'm sure you would care nothing about being that you're an atheist 

Edited November 19, 2017 by TheCLounge

[Marblehead]

19 minutes ago, TheCLounge said:

That's a whole different discussion though that I'm sure you would care nothing about being that you're an atheist 

Good observation.

 

[Jeff]

Thanks for sharing. My background is similar in many ways. Grew up active in the Protestant (Lutheran) Church. In my case, it was that I started feeling vibrations in my head. Those vibrations were accompanied with a great sense of “peace”. Soon found that I could move those vibrations all over my body. Since that didn’t fit with the mainstream Christian view, I started diving deep into my self and exploring. Things  sort of expanded from there.

[TheCLounge]

Jeff do you think you can explain why I felt those sensations in my chest and on the top of my head?

 

And when I look back at when I was covered with spots at age 13 I wonder if it deals with a past life. I read that a lot of past life reoccurrences are strongest during childhood. I was covered with spots but I wasn't sick or feverish. Doctors couldn't explain it. It left and never came back..

[ljazztrumpet]

3 hours ago, Marblehead said:

 

And yes, I have heard too of people replacing their external God with the concept "I Am".

 

I view this as a freeing of the spirit.  It is no longer dependent on something external.

 

Again, Marbleman is 'on point'!;-) In the case of using a label such as ‘God’, I think it can be an unfortunate case as it can disempower many of people who use it/believe in it, as there are many possibilities of turning an internal power into an external one.Then are those, I think of certain Christian mystics, who describe God as being within/without/everywhere. I think these types have had certain insights into nondual ‘realities’ and have a much clearer perspective. They probably realize, experientially on a deep level, that what they are is all there is.

 

 Then again, there are people who completely externalize God and they still have healings happening in, and around, them as well as emanating a beautiful loving and devotional energy. Also, I notice there are a good amount of people who use the idea of an external God as a surrender mechanism - Such as, ‘I put it all in God’s hands.’ A lot of these types of people seem to have good success and more peace in their lives. Probably many of us here are aware of the steps 2 + 3 of the 12 steps:

 

Step 2: Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.

Step 3: Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him.

 

So people still can do very well with a totally externalized, more religious conception of God. I just feel that one could go even further, after they reach a certain point, if they realize the power is within themselves. Having studied spiritual healing for a number of years, I go into various belief paradigms where physical healings have occurred. It is interesting to me that in the Christian paradigm, the people who are able to effect healings over others are the ones who seriously believe what the big JC said about, ‘Greater works than me shall you do.’ So that’s definitely a step in the right direction imo. They might be still be thinking JC is still the ‘son’ of some external God but, perhaps, at some point/lifetime of seeing they are doing greater things than JC, the whole external idea just dissolves. 

Edited November 19, 2017 by ljazztrumpet
punctuation

[TheCLounge]

To me the problem with "god" is that it means nothing and directs towards nothing unless you already known what God you're talking about.

 

Titles such as god and lord have a tendency to create fear and repulsion in people. It isn't personal.

 

Its like saying "father". But who exactly is your father??

 

I hear people scream "god!!" all the time and all they're doing is speaking on their delusions 

 

I believe the Roman Church took out his name and replaced it with god and lord because they wanted to control and manipulate people..

 

Names are personal and powerful. Titles are fleeting

 

People of various spiritual beliefs and/or religions know that saying "I AM" has a powerful vibrational effect on your body and mind. 

 

If anything, the God of the Bible's name is really just a phrase meant for prayer and meditative purposes....I AM (absolute, eternal, essence)

Edited November 19, 2017 by TheCLounge

[Jeff]

2 minutes ago, TheCLounge said:

Jeff do you think you can explain why I felt those sensations in my chest and on the top of my head?

 

And when I look back at when I was covered with spots at age 13 I wonder if it deals with a past life. I read that a lot of past life reoccurrences are strongest during childhood. I was covered with spots but I wasn't sick or feverish. Doctors couldn't explain it. It left and never came back..

 

Your heart was more broadly opening and you felt the flow streaming down into and thru your crown. In christain terms, you would say the power of the Holy Spirit descending. Spots or rashes are common signs of body purification with the increased energy flows (happened to me too).

 

Can explain the next stages (mystical Christian path) too, if you are ever interested. 

[Jeff]

14 minutes ago, ljazztrumpet said:

Again, Marbleman is 'on point'!;-) In the case of using a label such as ‘God’, I think it can be an unfortunate case as it can disempower the many of people who use it/believe in it as there are many possibilities of turning an internal power into an external one.Then are those, I think of certain Christian mystics, who describe God as being within/without/everywhere. I think these types have had certain insights into nondual ‘realities’ and have a much clearer perspective. They probably realize, experientially on a deep level, that what they are is all there is.

 

 Then again, there are people who completely externalize God and they still have healings happening in, and around, them as well as emanating a beautiful loving and devotional energy. Also, I notice there are a good amount of people who use the idea of an external God as a surrender mechanism - Such as, ‘I put it all in God’s hands.’ A lot of these types of people seem to have good success and more peace in their lives. Probably many of us here are aware of the steps 2 + 3 of the 12 steps:

 

Step 2: Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.

Step 3: Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him.

 

So people still can do very well with a totally externalized, more religious conception of God. I just feel that one could go even further, after they reach a certain point, if they realize the power is within themselves. Having studied spiritual healing for a number of years, I go into various belief paradigms where physical healings have occurred. It is interesting to me that in the Christian paradigm, the people who are able to effect healings over others are the ones who seriously believe what the big JC said about, ‘Greater works than me shall you do.’ So that’s definitely a step in the right direction imo. They might be still be thinking JC is still the ‘son’ of some external God but, perhaps, at some point/lifetime of seeing they are doing greater things than JC, the whole external idea just dissolves. 

 

While institutions may describe differently, Jesus is actually very clear on the point...

 

Luke 17: 20-21

20 Now when He was asked by the Pharisees when the kingdom of God would come, He answered them and said, “The kingdom of God does not come with observation; 21 nor will they say, ‘See here!’ or ‘See there!’For indeed, the kingdom of God is within you.”

 

[TheCLounge]

11 minutes ago, Jeff said:

 

Your heart was more broadly opening and you felt the flow streaming down into and thru your crown. In christain terms, you would say the power of the Holy Spirit descending. Spots or rashes are common signs of body purification with the increased energy flows (happened to me too).

 

Can explain the next stages (mystical Christian path) too, if you are ever interested. 

I'm all for it and I'm interested in learning..

 

my internet is disabled expect for a few sites (to help me with my mental celibacy). So I can't do any google searches

[ljazztrumpet]

5 minutes ago, TheCLounge said:

 

Its like saying "father". But who exactly is your father??

 

I think this is a cultural thing too. In this day and age I find, in the USA anyway, most people certainly don't have ideal childhoods and suffer from various forms trauma as a result of their upbringing. I would wager that, at the time the label god was used as 'father' that the way children were raised and dealt with was of a psychologically healthier nature. 

 

7 minutes ago, TheCLounge said:

 

 

People of various spiritual beliefs and/or religions know that saying "I AM" has a powerful vibrational effect on your body and mind. 

 

I don't know about that. I do know there is a whole school of belief that believe this does occur. One thing I do feel is that if you are using the term 'I AM' as a replacement for an external god idea, you are most likely taking effective steps in reprogramming your outlook to one of more empowerment and, in that sense, you may be having an actual energetic, healing type of effect on your body and mind.

[ljazztrumpet]

 

17 minutes ago, Jeff said:

Can explain the next stages (mystical Christian path) too, if you are ever interested. 

 

5 minutes ago, TheCLounge said:

I'm all for it and I'm interested in learning..

 

Yes, me too..Any time you have the time and inclination to share...thanks!