is this energy or mental formation or both?

[Edward M]

I'll write this second time but different.  is experience of having leg channels opened and energy flowing through along with changed pace in walking and direction a result of newly opened channels and fear causing theme of remote control, or fear full stop?

 

I dont even meditate any more and qigong goes wrong, interference, so I'm confused.....    

 

fear level its too great to meditate, and wake up in morning consumed by same fear of being taken over. 

 

 

Edited July 10, 2018 by Edward M

[Aetherous]

I'm not sure what you're asking...the language is unclear.

 

Try your best to find a way to be calm and peaceful. Often times, the mind can get overwhelming, and stories that we tell ourselves can get amplified...so best to have no-mind, just forget about all of whatever is going on, and just focus on normal things in the real world.

[Edward M]

Thanks, ill take that advice.

 

 

[Edward M]

Hi again all,

 

listen, I'm really confused, all the experiences I'm having could be just new energy flows and I'm assigning fear based meanings to them, but the experiences are so out there, and involuntary and at the worst possible times (no family life anymore), that its hard to believe thats the case.  Ive had big energetic experiences in the distant past, 11 years and backwards, but like I said I don't meditate now or do much qigong. Could this be a reawakening of energy and I've just not got the awareness/space in mind to handle it properly?  

 

If so, the answer is obvious... if not, well, ill just have to be stronger.

Thanks,

Edward 

 

[Lost in Translation]

4 hours ago, Edward M said:

fear level its too great to meditate, and wake up in morning consumed by same fear of being taken over. 

 

Fear can mean many things, including progress. Pay attention to your fear. What is it telling you, specifically what is it telling you NOT to do? Take a good look at what it is telling you NOT to do then make your choice. This may be a case where the wisest choice of action is to dive head first into what causes your fear.

[Edward M]

Thanks lit , makes a lot of sense, thank you. I get it now, thank you that is a lot of help.

 

Peace,

Edward 

 

[Edward M]

Sorry I do think now I'm in trouble, something has been activated in me that wasn't there before. its to get me under control, this world is not what it seems we are living under an occult regime,  we routinely have magic used on us, in fact it could be said some events are mass talismans for occult energies to manifest. 

 

 

[Edward M]

Ive literally just had an additional sushumna plant come up that is meant to override my own free will.  

[Edward M]

this is overriding my own inner voice, this is the biggest sin ever, the still small voice within, is how God speak to us..... they cannot get away with this! 

[Edward M]

funny how they know I've got a visit by a doctor coming within half an hour and this happens, hmmmm perhaps trying to get me sectioned.... find some other mug, such as yourself to get sectioned you criminals... 

[Edward M]

This is an attempt to initiate me against my will, to bring me under control of some slavemaster who wants to control the general public for their own agenda 

[Jeff]

23 minutes ago, Edward M said:

This is an attempt to initiate me against my will, to bring me under control of some slavemaster who wants to control the general public for their own agenda 

 

Hi Edward,

 

Take a deep breath and try to focus on me.  See if you can stick your finger in my heart right now. No need for complicated visualizations, just feel yourself doing it.

 

See what you get...

 

Love,

Jeff

[Edward M]

Apparently this is for my own good to keep from being murdered, its either slavery or murder, I'm not accepting either!  whoever remote controlled me around this morning, why????????   life is not a game, this is real people, human beings, you cannot just have them do what you want for your own kicks or sense of security and self comfort. thats what it comes down to, selfish motives are the opposite of the true impulse within us, there fore it is the opposite of Gods will, and if followed leads to the dark side.  

[Edward M]

Thanks Jeff, there are too many other people in my awareness, I cant locate you without coming into contact of others... thanks for the support though! 

[Edward M]

This is serious, some occult person invoked something within me to try to attempt to counterfeit the heart voice of my own true will.  This is none other than the beast at work. Christ spoke of the counterfeit spirit in his teachings, the false spirit, spirit of selfishness.  

[Edward M]

If this is government, or monarchy, what have I done to deserve enslavement against my own will?  they are as of present trying to take down the real energy from my system, this is attempted murder via occult vampirism 

[silent thunder]

I recall a potent realization one day many decades ago regarding energy flows and fear that seems to be similar to what you are describing.

 

When my energy flows amped up and "flooded my system", I had a tendency to interpret that sudden flow of raw power as my fear response, even when there was nothing to be afraid of in my environment or my mind.   The two flows were nigh on indistinguishable for me in my early 20's and took some time for sensitivity to attune to the new flows.

 

Upon realizing that what I was interpreting as fear, was in fact, just the raw, neutral flow of energy, I was able to shift away from the association of my personal power, with fear and this triggered unfolding in the heart that generated great shift.

 

In the beginning, new energy flows arrived with such force that it was jarring and unsettling. 

 

Hope this helps, if not, hope you're own insight brings you release and comfort soon.

 

st

[Edward M]

Thanks ST, that is what is was hoping to hear in the beginning when I started this topic, but the stuff I'm experiencing is so bizarre and out there, that I'm having a hard time believing its all fear based now.    it literally feels like an attempt to take over my will.  I really hope you are right and it will settle down.  Thanks again for your good words. its hard to imagine that nightmares of this kind really happen, especially in this era. 

[Aetherous]

At this point, I do think this is all in your mind. I experienced similar paranoia at one point, and ended up being hospitalized twice because of what I believed was happening (delusions).

If your experiences seem a little weird, just ignore it and don't feed into a story of powerful people messing with you.

I know how hard it is to realize that all of our fear is from the mind making up stories, and in psychiatry they actually teach not to confront a person with delusions with the truth...but I think the sooner you can realize what's going on, the better.

If you don't believe what I'm saying and trust your own experience more, I understand...but I hope that this idea, that it's all in your mind and that you can be free of it if you just let go and forget about all of it, sticks with you so as to help you. Best of luck!

[Edward M]

Thanks man, but its not they make it clear each time it seem like that, thats its them having power over me. But whatever happens its an illusion,, no one has power over another,  say hypothetically it was a head of state, with no state subjects there would be no head of state, its all an illusion. So I'm saying you are right, there is no power over me, except spirit, sustainer of the sustained. peace

Edited July 10, 2018 by Edward M

[Kar3n]

Edward, think about it...

 

If there was someone with real power over you do you think they would be allowing you to out them here?  

 

Sometimes energy can feel so real. I have had some hellish experiences but I knew it was just how my mind was interpreting energy flows. It is so hard to get past our own thoughts and inturpretations but it is possible.

 

Go outside, change your scenery for a bit, take a bath, do anything but sit and dwell on it. Do something to help dissipate the excess energy. Hell, do push ups until you can't do anymore and then take a nap.

 

I'm sorry you're dealing with this. It will get better.

[silent thunder]

34 minutes ago, Edward M said:

Thanks ST, that is what is was hoping to hear in the beginning when I started this topic, but the stuff I'm experiencing is so bizarre and out there, that I'm having a hard time believing its all fear based now.    it literally feels like an attempt to take over my will.  I really hope you are right and it will settle down.  Thanks again for your good words. its hard to imagine that nightmares of this kind really happen, especially in this era. 

You are most welcome mate.  I find some energetic patterns in my own life, especially highly charged emotional ones, can take on an inertia of their own when they reach a certain stage.  It can feel like an external source infringing on my self.  I sometimes wonder if some cases of possession are related to this... the force of the raw emotional energy comes to such a peak that it reaches a point of self sustainability and begins to run on its own, even when our conscious mind wants to stop it. 

 

I recall for some time, seemingly randomly, on and off over several years, energy flows would wake me in the small hours with wildly racing panic-like energy.  There was never a focus for it.  I wasn't waking from nightmares, there were no lingering worries in my life that woke me... what woke me was just a raw, powerful energy flow very like panic up the back of the neck.

For a time what would occur almost instantly when this energy arose, my mind would then associate artefacts, memories, and fantasies of fears to the feeling; and then it was easy to fall into a self feeding loop and obsess about all the various things in the world to be upset and fearful of and that loop could manifest and sustain intense suffering for hours, or I imagine days if allowed.

 

What shifted in me in response to an intent to not feed this fear cycle, was chanting mantra.  I was sensitive enough to know that fearful thoughts were not the source of the energy, but an associative response.  Knowing that, it was still not simple to keep the mind from then running amok through all the potential willy nilly fears that an imaginative person can come up with.

 

What occured spontaneously in response, was mantra.  One night, waking into this panic like energy, I recall beginning to chant a (seemingly random) mantra loudly in my mind... over and over I shouted it, drowing out all other thoughts that wanted to arise.  I would not allow thoughts to begin which would reinforce the fear like energy.  I chanted insistently and with intensity (although silently either lying in bed next to my gal, or sometimes getting up and moving about the house).  I chanted until the energy subsided and the impulse for the mind to create artefacts ebbed away.  Sometimes, even though this was silent, I was shouting the mantra in my mind in order to override the artefacts.

 

Looking back, I see some of these episodes were related to unknotting energetic blockages related to deep seated, very old shame and old fears artefacts themselves.  Mantra allowed me to remain in presence with the energy while not feeding or associating with it and allowing the energy pass through, without engaging in it.  Eventually these episodes ebbed away and at present, I don't recall the last time one occured.

 

The mantra I used came to me spontaneously and I don't consider the phrase itself to be important or special.  It was not one I was given by a teacher or read in a book.  It simply arose in my mind naturally as a tool to override the thoughts that began in response to the energy.

 

Compassion and Gratitude for you sharing your thoughts on this mate... it takes courage to reach out with personal matters.  But you have helped me in your sharing... it does me good to recall such matters now, even if they don't directly help you, you have helped me in your sharing.  Reminds me that even though sometimes it feels like I'm spinning my wheels with all this meditation and energy work, the work is in fact, cumulative and looking back I can see where shift has occured and I am bouyed.

 

I'm reminded of something I shared delivering my Father's eulogy.

 

We should share everything.  Our grief and our love.  When we share our grief, it diminishes a bit... and when we share our love, it grows exponentially. 

 

thanks for sharing mate.

 

st

[Edward M]

Thanks Karen, ill do my best to take my mind off it, its gotten out of hand 

 

ST, thanks for your good descriptions of what you went through, and sorry to hear of your fathers passing, and like you said, thanks for sharing, take care, peace.

Edward 

[dwai]

1 hour ago, Edward M said:

Thanks ST, that is what is was hoping to hear in the beginning when I started this topic, but the stuff I'm experiencing is so bizarre and out there, that I'm having a hard time believing its all fear based now.    it literally feels like an attempt to take over my will.  I really hope you are right and it will settle down.  Thanks again for your good words. its hard to imagine that nightmares of this kind really happen, especially in this era. 

Since you are aware of what is happening, ask yourself "Who is aware of all this that is happening?"

You cannot be touched. You are spotless and free. Nothing can harm you. You are infinite and eternal. Just stay as the one who is aware of all this or that happening...

[Edward M]

Thanks Dwai, I'm yet to be of that realisation, thanks for the suggestion....