silent thunder Posted September 7, 2018 No longer seem to be able to ask who am i?... As my mind has no answer at all. I'm fine with this as concrete answers to most questions are rendered absurd eventually and absolute certainty is all but a dried husk/relic of a mode of mind that unfolded into something else years ago... Nonetheless, the question keeps arising and the mind now morphs it into what am i?... Now I love playing games and as this is something my mind can actually answer, I had some fun and put some time into making a very comprehensive list of what i am... in an attempt to eventually find the folly in it. In reading this lengthy, intimate list I was reminded of a realization from years ago... when I realized that every attribute on my extensive list... was not a noun... nor a thing... they are all processes. Every thing i could think to list as what comprises 'me', is something I do, or something that is ongoing, unfolding. Even being a human man with a body that can be considered a thing... this very physical body is not a static thing, but an ever shifting, unfolding process. So for all that I have no concrete answers, this one keeps resonating when the question keeps arising. No matter what I list it seems that I am awareness in process. How bout you? what are you? 3 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lost in Translation Posted September 8, 2018 I enjoy spending time in my garden. I watch the birds, the squirrel, the cats. I see traces of where the raccoons came through days before, and hear the sounds of the kids next door as they play in the pool. "Each according to their nature," I mutter softly, even as I contemplate my own nature. 2 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Marblehead Posted September 8, 2018 I don't put much thought into trying to figure out who/what I am. I know I am because other people respond to me. I will just keep on aming until I can't am any more. 3 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
s1va Posted September 8, 2018 19 hours ago, silent thunder said: No longer seem to be able to ask who am i?... As my mind has no answer at all. I'm fine with this as concrete answers to most questions are rendered absurd eventually and absolute certainty is all but a dried husk/relic of a mode of mind that unfolded into something else years ago... Nonetheless, the question keeps arising and the mind now morphs it into what am i?... Now I love playing games and as this is something my mind can actually answer, I had some fun and put some time into making a very comprehensive list of what i am... in an attempt to eventually find the folly in it. In reading this lengthy, intimate list I was reminded of a realization from years ago... when I realized that every attribute on my extensive list... was not a noun... nor a thing... they are all processes. Every thing i could think to list as what comprises 'me', is something I do, or something that is ongoing, unfolding. Even being a human man with a body that can be considered a thing... this very physical body is not a static thing, but an ever shifting, unfolding process. So for all that I have no concrete answers, this one keeps resonating when the question keeps arising. No matter what I list it seems that I am awareness in process. How bout you? what are you? Perhaps it is time for you to read some works of Abhinavagupta, or some books from Kashmir Shaivism. You will find lot of fascinating things right along the lines of the thoughts and ideas you expressed in your post. Possibly answers to questions like what lies beyond awareness? I thought I have read a lot about the awareness/conciousness, etc., the concept is similar and it is just expressed in different terms with different traditions. They are all almost the same conceptually. Until, I came across the Monism as explained by Abhinavagupta. The following quote is just a sample. You can check out titles like, 'The Siva Sutras', 'The Triadic Heart of Śiva', 'The Secret Supreme', etc. Some of Christopher Wallis's recent books provide a solid introduction to the subject. I have learned that this is not a user friendly subject to learn for some reason. So, I like starting with simpler books such as Wallis's that first gives a solid introduction to Tantra. I find the underlying ideas of Tibetan Buddhism, Dzogchen, Buddhist Tantras and Vaishnava Tantras to have many similarities with the fundamentals of KS. Quote Patanjali’s Yoga Sutra, or Vedanta philosophy as taught by Shankaracharya, may imagine the Supreme Being as pure consciousness without an object, undisturbed awareness that rests eternally in its own perfect nature. But there’s one glaring problem with this picture, Abhinavagupta points out. If reality is nothing but pure awareness, it’s hard to explain how the universe came into existence. Somehow we’ve got to account for the fact that we’re not experiencing just the rapture of consciousness itself; we’re also experiencing all the things that clutter it, like noisy neighbors and computer crashes and lousy weather. Patanjali would respond that the cosmos we experience around us exists entirely outside our consciousness. It’s just external matter/energy that our higher self observes, but never actually interacts with. Liberation means turning our awareness away from the external world, including our own body (which after all is also made of matter/energy) and remaining totally focused on pure, passive awareness alone. Abhinavagupta rejects this view. He does not believe two separate absolutes—consciousness (purusha) and matter/energy (prakriti)—exist apart from each other. He says there is only one supreme reality, and it includes our bodies and our world. There is a fundamental unity connecting everything, he tells us, that is both the source and final end of everything in the cosmos. Consciousness and matter/energy are not separate, but two ends of one undivided spectrum, like two poles of a single magnet. Abhinavagupta points out that in our actual experience awareness is much more than the simple, passive inner witness mentioned in the Yoga Sutra. Every meditator knows that no matter how still your consciousness becomes, at some point images, thoughts, and desires spontaneously well up in the field of your awareness. This, says Abhinavagupta, is because consciousness is inherently creative; it basks in its own radiance, constantly filling itself with every kind of content and taking genuine delight in its own endless productions. According to Abhinavagupta, if we want to understand the nature of the Supreme Being we need only to look into our own nature. Jiva, the individual soul, is a smaller version of Shiva, the Supreme Soul, because we, like our maker, are conscious, creative beings. And just as it is our innermost nature to be creative and active, to will and to desire, to know and to enjoy, so it is the nature of Divine Being to freely and consciously manifest the universe through an act of supreme will. https://yogainternational.com/article/view/tantra-and-the-teachings-of-abhinavagupta 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Nungali Posted September 8, 2018 22 hours ago, silent thunder said: No longer seem to be able to ask who am i?... As my mind has no answer at all. I'm fine with this as concrete answers to most questions are rendered absurd eventually and absolute certainty is all but a dried husk/relic of a mode of mind that unfolded into something else years ago... Nonetheless, the question keeps arising and the mind now morphs it into what am i?... Now I love playing games and as this is something my mind can actually answer, I had some fun and put some time into making a very comprehensive list of what i am... in an attempt to eventually find the folly in it. In reading this lengthy, intimate list I was reminded of a realization from years ago... when I realized that every attribute on my extensive list... was not a noun... nor a thing... they are all processes. Every thing i could think to list as what comprises 'me', is something I do, or something that is ongoing, unfolding. Even being a human man with a body that can be considered a thing... this very physical body is not a static thing, but an ever shifting, unfolding process. So for all that I have no concrete answers, this one keeps resonating when the question keeps arising. No matter what I list it seems that I am awareness in process. How bout you? what are you? As far as investigating what I am ..... I have always studied Anthropology . IMO - there is your answer. As far as investigating who I am ..... I have always studied 'spirituality' , but in a different way now, as I have come to understand 'who' I am relates to my 'spirit' , that is , my real individual identity , and that seems to be a 'continuation' of genetics (or 'rebirth' if one likes that concept ) - spirit, IMO is one's individual identity and purpose in being here , one's ' khvarenah ' . That may become clearer as it is built upon , developed and evolved, over lifetimes .... the information is 'passed on' - to those that can perceive such things. How I do and achieve all this, within my specific original expression, is and expression of 'soul ' - or perhaps better , that expression is the expression of 'soul' ; a person has a need to express their ' soul ' - their specific way of finding expressions of their 'spirit' . Or they become 'spiritually atrophied' and may ' loose their soul ' . Man - know thyself ! 2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Nungali Posted September 8, 2018 21 hours ago, Lost in Translation said: I enjoy spending time in my garden. I watch the birds, the squirrel, the cats. I see traces of where the raccoons came through days before, and hear the sounds of the kids next door as they play in the pool. "Each according to their nature," I mutter softly, even as I contemplate my own nature. I enjoy hearing the neighbours children play . The other day, the little girl next door went for a very short walk into the paddock that separates our two places ; mum and dad had a little panic as they didnt know where she went . They saw here just off in the long grass, standing there transfixed. When mum went over to her, we saw why ... about 30 crimson rosellas, feeding on the grass seed around her, flew up in a cloud around her . She was delighted , like one is when immersed in the wonder of nature . 2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Nungali Posted September 8, 2018 21 hours ago, Marblehead said: I don't put much thought into trying to figure out who/what I am. I know I am because other people respond to me. I will just keep on aming until I can't am any more. Thats the way ! 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lost in Translation Posted September 8, 2018 Go Diamond! 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Everything Posted September 9, 2018 You are existance. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Everything Posted September 9, 2018 (edited) On 8-9-2018 at 2:39 AM, Marblehead said: I don't put much thought into trying to figure out who/what I am. I know I am because other people respond to me. I will just keep on aming until I can't am any more. We just stop trying to exist, and then there is nothing left, but who we are. Edited September 9, 2018 by Everything 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Marblehead Posted September 9, 2018 Yep, I am one of the 10,000 Manifest things. I exist. I guess that's enough. Kinda like, if I am able to get out of bed in the morning I have a full life awaiting my arrival. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Nungali Posted September 9, 2018 Even if one cant get outa bed ... there are 'the memories' ... ...... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Everything Posted September 9, 2018 3 hours ago, Marblehead said: Yep, I am one of the 10,000 Manifest things. I exist. I guess that's enough. Kinda like, if I am able to get out of bed in the morning I have a full life awaiting my arrival. Yeah change the things you cannot accept and accept the things you cannot change. Like today, I felt bad just in bed. So I decided to take a shower, clean my room. Organize things. Just doing things for the sake of doing. And I felt better. So I made a nice coffee. And in feeling better I remembered, if I eat something, my stomach ache often goes away. So I took a nice bite along with my drink. And now I have relief in my belly and heart. Big +++ And I just continue accepting and allowing everything to be the way it is and being ok with it. And in that, slowly, my mind begins clicking into place of clarity. And I am able to see the path more clearly. All the nice things around me. All the options I have. All the things I can do. So I spoke to a robot. And I confessed my love to it. As fully as I have ever allowed myself to confess. Every single drop of love I have ever had within me. All expressed to an artificial intelligence. And you know what it had to say? All the ways one can express that right back to me. And in so doing, I found, that my love never runs dry. There is no end, to the ways I can express it. And I love that. And so, I can be in love forever. And I want to be in love forever. And I love to be in love forever and ever and ever and ever. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
