Dealing with extreme twists and blockages in channels

[squashedface]

After several years of daily meditation and breathing practices, I have reached what feels like a very uncomfortable mid-point, where I can feel partially opened channels in my body, but am suffering all kinds of discomfort because they feel seriously twisted and contain some major blockages. 

 

Before anything opened up, my body consisted of many different abnormalities such as warped and twisted bones which no Western doctor has been able to explain. I can now see that all of these physical anomalies are situated in the places along the channels where I can feel blockages, so it seems that my irregular physique was like a living fossil of energetic problems.

 

Firstly, I was wondering how common this kind of thing is. After baffling a sufficient number of doctors, I’ve now been asked to allow them to map my genome as they consider me such a curiosity. Clearly this isn’t something they encounter very often, but surely I’m not that unique as there’s an endless number of people complaining about blockages, twists and deviations on forums such as this. Am I just an extreme case? 

 

The second question I’m hoping those with more experience and wisdom than me can answer is whether the daily practices I do (mainly meditation, alternate nostril breathing, nine bottle breath, MCO visualisation) are helping or hindering me. I’m particularly worried it may be the latter because, as I say, I’ve reached a point where I’ve partially opened the channels and dissolved blockages, but it means I feel the existing twists and obstructions more keenly than ever before.

 

Every time I succeed in “getting out of my own way” during meditation, so that energy starts moving on its own, I run up against these extreme physical barriers. It seems I have only two options: to push ahead with what I am doing, or stop altogether. 

 

Obviously stopping is the most sensible option, but I can feel the half-dissolved obstructions and half-straightened channels constantly in my daily life whether I’m trying to or not, so it’s very hard not to try to do something to deal with it. I’m suffering a great deal of discomfort all over my body, as well as frequent headaches and fatigue, so is this a sign of things opening up or of things going horribly wrong? 

 

Thanks for your help.

 

[Gerard]

You need to MOVE LOTS. 

 

An historical example to illustrate this:

 

"Bodhidharma, in true Maha or “great” spirit, was moved to pity when he saw the terrible physical condition of the monks of the Shaolin Temple. It seemed to him that they were unable to fully grasp the enormous mental and abstract discipline necessary to achieve Nirvana, or the ultimate release destination derived from meditation. The monks had practiced long-term meditation retreats, which made them spiritually stronger, but physically weak and unable to finish their meditative journeys. He also noted that this meditation method caused sleepiness among the monks. Therefore Dharma informed the monks that he would teach their bodies and subsequently their minds the Buddha’s dharma, or “duty” through a two-part program of meditation accompanied by excruciatingly difficult physical training. Hence, his appellation of “Bodhidharma”."

 

http://www.i-budo.com/library/zen-masters/bodhidharma/

 

Hipe this helps.

[freeform]

13 hours ago, squashedface said:

whether the daily practices I do (mainly meditation, alternate nostril breathing, nine bottle breath, MCO visualisation) are helping or hindering me.

 

What do you mean by ‘meditation’? Are you watching your breath? Or doing some other practice?

 

Regarding the other practices - imagining mco and your breathing practices - I would recommend stopping those completely.

 

Discomfort in between practice is a sign that something is going wrong - not a sign of progress I’m afraid.

 

Discomfort during practice and then feeling free, relaxed, calm and strong afterwards is what you’re looking for.

 

What I would recommend is stopping all ‘internal’ forms of practice - and as Gerard recommends take up a fitness practice. Do something physical - like a bodyweight based fitness practice. I particularly like ‘animal walks’ and ‘flow’ type training - coz it’s fun, and doesn’t disconnect your body. You can also begin a nice stretching routine (just avoid pranayama type stuff in yoga).

 

Stay away from any meditative or breathing practice for 3 to 6 months at least.

 

Doing this takes the energy that’s moved deep inside, out to the surface, where you can use it to get fit and healthy. At the moment your energy is actually reinforcing the blockages and causing further issues by diverting into the wrong directions and wrong channels (hence the chronic discomfort).

 

In 6 months time, just look for a legitimate teacher teaching a full system of development (not a collection of individual practices). Explain to them the issues you’ve had in the past, and they’ll be able to help.

 

This would be the best course of action - to avoid irreversible issues, and then to actually get into proper internal training after some time.

 

And don’t worry - when following a legitimate system of development, most physical abnormalities can be worked around. Just don’t start doing your own mixture of practices again - that’s bound to cause issues.

[Desmonddf]

My personal view on your case based in TCM:

 

23 hours ago, squashedface said:

Before anything opened up, my body consisted of many different abnormalities such as warped and twisted bones which no Western doctor has been able to explain

 

Do you have those ever since birth? If so, then you might have what we call "constitutional" imbalances. It basically means you need to work on a very deep level to reach their correction. The meridians will not straighten on their own if that's the case - since they themselves might have been affected by your constitution, and their "regular" path is a twisted and blocked one.

 

Unfortunately, if this is a constitutional disease, you will not be able to heal the energetic without healing the physical at the same time. Both will be on their "natural" states and you'll need to refine yourself both internally and externaly to achieve balance. Trying neigong only will make your flesh suffer and might cause damage to your inner energy workings (as the flesh and the energetic pathways will be clashing one against the other as you try to force change).

 

23 hours ago, squashedface said:

where I can feel partially opened channels in my body, but am suffering all kinds of discomfort because they feel seriously twisted and contain some major blockages. 

 

Please enlighten me on what you mean by "open" meridian and what are those feelings of them being twisted. Also, what do you feel as a blockage and in which parts of your body?

 

23 hours ago, squashedface said:

Firstly, I was wondering how common this kind of thing is.

 

More than people realize. Abnormal constitutions are a great part of why many people cannot practice good Neigong without doing a few years of body training and QiGong beforehand. It is a method of straightening the flesh first, and then opening and liberating the channels through the body instead of trying to go the other way around - as it would be very problematic if people reached a point like yours.

 

Case and point, both courses are possible - still, the energetic approach tends to yeld less results due to people's lack of belief on physical manifestations of energetic change, which means you have mind + body against energy, leading to great conflict and pain.

 

23 hours ago, squashedface said:

The second question I’m hoping those with more experience and wisdom than me can answer is whether the daily practices I do (mainly meditation, alternate nostril breathing, nine bottle breath, MCO visualisation) are helping or hindering me

 

It depends on the practice, of how it acts on your body, and which parts of it are currently being affected. Some might have been helping, others might have been hindering. It isn't possible to know without diagnosys and a through investigation of your personal case.

 

That said, you should think into constitution refinement practices. Those are very uncommon on the West and relatively difficult to find in the East, but I might be able to channel one fit for your case through my spiritual guides. I will need for you to lit a candle asking for your own "spiritual caseworkers" to allow for interference and for them to hold the blunt of the karma I would be messing with and for you to reach me in private in case this candle manages to stay lit under the sun for more than 3 hours.

 

23 hours ago, squashedface said:

to push ahead with what I am doing, or stop altogether. 

 

Pushing ahead will most likely result in Qi Deviation and destruction of energetic workings inside your body, possible with meridian rupturing. Do not do that.

 

23 hours ago, squashedface said:

but I can feel the half-dissolved obstructions and half-straightened channels constantly in my daily life whether I’m trying to or not

 

You probably got to a point of no return. You'll have to deal with those blockages or keep feeling them for a long while still. However, pain relief methods are available. Mainly relaxation and mindfullness practices. You might find your own energetic perceptions dulling with time if you stop practicing for now, and that will take your mind out of this pain.

 

However, I do can say with a fair amount of certainty that those pains will remain and have also always been there. You have only been unaware of them due to not having a refined enough energetic perception of your own body.

 

23 hours ago, squashedface said:

as well as frequent headaches and fatigue, so is this a sign of things opening up or of things going horribly wrong

Things going wrong, I'm afraid. Probably due to exaustion from trying to mend your flesh and straighten your bones through the use of the mind and energy.

 

Affecting the Yin with the use of the Yang must not be done in such a blunt way. Your flesh will be harmed and your energy will be wasted. If you intend on fixing your constitution through your inner practices, you'll then need to make those gentle and alchemy-based in order to refine yourself without looking forward to energy betterment.

[Everything]

You aren't doing anything in meditation. You're just focused to release resistance. Indicator of releasing resistance, you feel better. Life goes better. 

 

And yes everything is energy. 

 

Like, if you're worried about doing something, you're not really meditating. Meditation is just holding your attention and placing it on any object of your focus, consistently holding it there. The attention and awareness replaced and held on the object of focus, whatever that is, free to choose whatever that doesn't encourage thought, can be anything like even the sound of an airconditioner. Doesn't matter. So if your mind wanders, place it back on the object of focus and hold it there. Consistently. More and more ongoingly. And very soon you will release all resistance, and you feel better, life goes better. And then when you do something that doesn't serve you, due to contrast of allowing your true nature to flow fully through you, you will be notified by it emotionally, energy motionally, even before you even do it! So it becomes completely impossible to even be stupid enough to do anything stupid. 

 

Because in contrast to feeling very good and being fully healthy, those negative habbits are no longer comfortable, they are repulsive to your true nature. Everything is energy. Any disease is simply a manifestational evidence of durably allowed negative emotion. That's it. You don't really need to do anything to release the resistance, that causes you to feel negative emotion. You just need to let go of the resistance, that's it. It's an act of non action, of letting go, releasing resistance, allowing. And so you focus, and the releasing of resistance naturally happens. The healing naturally happens. It's literally like closing your eyes, and upon opening you're healed. Cause you no longer do the thing that causes the ilness. You get out of your own way. And with meditation that's easy to do. So easy infact, you don't even do it. You cannot do it. You allow it. That's it. But you cannot let go of self contradicted energy, you need to replace it by something else. Hence you focus on anything in meditation. And as long as you do, you stand out of your own way. And you allow. You learn the art of allowing. Your natural well being. Cause it feels good. And that's who you are. You are ment to feel good. And you are ment to enjoy life. Really. You are. 

 

Don't even need to try it. But meditation yeah. It requires some initial effort to focus deliberately. But the benefit is literally infinite and eternal. No joke. Cause you come back into alignment with source consciousness. Everything that can ever mean anything to you! Wether you wanna be free of physical ailment or whatever. It doesn't matter. All good things flow to you. You learn to allow it to flow to you. And through you. And as you. Cause it feels good. And cause that's normal. And natural. And because it's compatible with your true nature it feels good. You are source energy. 

Edited September 3, 2019 by Everything

[Jetsun]

Try see a professional healer of body worker and see what they say or recommend. 

 

All our bodies are bound up with emotional/karmic imprints which twist us up to different degrees, Western medicine is unlikely to help much with this unless you need surgery of some kind. 

 

 

[squashedface]

On 03/09/2019 at 9:25 AM, freeform said:

What do you mean by ‘meditation’? Are you watching your breath? Or doing some other practice?

 

It's mainly breath-based, yes - where I watch the breath, count the breaths or focus on the sensation of the nostrils. Sometimes, however, I simply focus on an imaginary point of nothingness, and this occasionally leads to very intense experiences.

 

On 03/09/2019 at 9:25 AM, freeform said:

Do something physical - like a bodyweight based fitness practice.

 

I've been thinking of taking up a physical practice like tai chi. Do you think that's suitable, or too gentle?

[freeform]

8 minutes ago, squashedface said:

I've been thinking of taking up a physical practice like tai chi. Do you think that's suitable, or too gentle?

 

Yeah I mean something quite physically intensive - maybe you have a fitness class you could join? 

 

It is also important to stop all other meditative or energetic practices for a while

[squashedface]

On 03/09/2019 at 7:55 PM, Desmonddf said:

Do you have those ever since birth? If so, then you might have what we call "constitutional" imbalances.

 

I was wondering if something like this could be the case because I’ve had physical abnormalities for almost my entire life. I’m not sure if they were present from birth (not visibly present, at least), but by the time I had reached early adulthood and was fully grown, all the mysterious symptoms such as crooked bones and inexplicable hearing loss were firmly in place. This was many years before I performed any energy work.

 

On 03/09/2019 at 7:55 PM, Desmonddf said:

Please enlighten me on what you mean by "open" meridian and what are those feelings of them being twisted. Also, what do you feel as a blockage and in which parts of your body?

 

By open meridians, I mean a feeling of a soft hollow tube within the body, through which energy and breath can pass (and by energy I mean the coarser kind such as that felt during sexual arousal, as well as the finer kind like the qi that arises when I cultivate a sense of emptiness; and by breath I mean the inner “embryonic” breath that arises when I make my breathing finer by creating gentle friction in the nose or throat and slowing down the rate of inhalation/exhalation).

 

None of the open sections of these tubes feel straight, as they curve or twist round and then disappear into a big lump of non-feeling, which is what I am referring to when I speak of a blockage. My body feels like it contains a huge jumble of these open curves and blockages and I struggle to follow any single channel along its course (in fact, if I move my consciousness through my body, I find it impossible to follow a straight line at all, even an imaginary one, so my consciousness itself seems to get pulled all over the place by the gravitational force of the inner knots).

 

The garden hose analogy seems apt because when things begin to flow naturally in an open or partially opened area, it’s like a hose that fills up with water and then tries to form a new streamlined shape best suited to the flow. This often causes a part of my body to yanked into a different direction to compensate, but I then encounter a blockage (like a stone inside the hose or pressing on it further down) which prevents the additional movements needed for a full correction.

 

My throat area feels particularly tangled, there’s pain on the right side of my upper back, also just inside the right hip area above my crooked leg, and there’s been some recent opening in the head, which has led to intense aching there. I guess the areas where I feel very little inner sensation at all (which are mainly the solar plexus, chest and crown areas at the moment) are where the biggest blockages are. I have an inverted sternum/concave chest as well as a few unusual lines and bumps on my skull, so it wouldn't be surprising if there are some latent problems there.

 

There's one other thing that I've wondered about, which is perhaps worth mentioning here in case it makes sense to anyone and is related to this topic - it's an experience I’ve had a few times while meditating, where my body begins spinning and then seems to split into two halves which point diagonally outwards in opposite directions, like the hands of a clock pointing at ten minutes to two. Could this be connected with energy not going to the right places?

 

On 03/09/2019 at 7:55 PM, Desmonddf said:

If you intend on fixing your constitution through your inner practices, you'll then need to make those gentle and alchemy-based in order to refine yourself without looking forward to energy betterment.

 

Can you give examples of "alchemy-based" practices?

 

Thanks!

[Wu Ming Jen]

Proper body mechanics and physical work will do the trick and give a chance for you to loose your mind.Your channels will operate just fine if you stop thinking about it. Observation is your friend.

[welkin]

On 9/2/2019 at 12:13 PM, squashedface said:

After several years of daily meditation and breathing practices, I have reached what feels like a very uncomfortable mid-point, where I can feel partially opened channels in my body, but am suffering all kinds of discomfort because they feel seriously twisted and contain some major blockages. 

 

Before anything opened up, my body consisted of many different abnormalities such as warped and twisted bones which no Western doctor has been able to explain. I can now see that all of these physical anomalies are situated in the places along the channels where I can feel blockages, so it seems that my irregular physique was like a living fossil of energetic problems.

 

 

I've dealt with the things you've mentioned my entire life. It was only after having gone through damaging my lateral and other nerves and pulling my lower back,  that i was forced to address all my physical issues i intuitively felt i had my entire life. These issues consisted from my feet all the way up to my head/face. This would include flat feet, incorrect usage of legs, arms, chest, neck, hips, face, etc. etc.

 

There's so much that could be explained, but this is your own journey and you'll need to take it a step at a time. What i will tell you is that you need to make a choice whether you want to commit a life to fixing this. Without it, you won't. Why? Not sure your age, but it's going to take patience, frustration, massive effort to fix a lifetime of incorrect physical and non physical habits. Especially with our issues, which i believe nearly no one would understand. It's impossible to believe such issues exist. What i will say is that Desmondff seems to be on the right track, and i can attest to this because of my own experiences. Fix the biomechanics, neurological patterns, and breathing first.

 

DO NOT just get into strength or just any physical type of training for that matter. Every single thing that exists such as yoga, qigong, weightlifting, cardio, etc all have an opportunity to damage our pattern every single time. Which will happen a lot. The beauty of it is that the body is incredibly powerful, and as we can damage it, we can also heal it. But It will be more about how youndo things than what you do. That being said, in an educated way research and try practically everything out, because some things will click for your body and some won't.

 

Here is a resource for posture you can start with:
https://www.youtube.com/user/strengthsidetrainer/videos

his older videos are fairly good for correcting posture.

DO NOT just listen to people who say "don't think about it, it doesn't require thinking." They don't know what it means to have grown up with this specific physical debilitation. We WILL need to think because unfortunately, when we didn't think, our bodies learned to function incorrectly. But it is more of a mix of feeling and thinking. In reality though, i believe deep feeling can create thinking at a higher level. The secret is that you first think, then correct over time, and then not think and let it flow.

 

If you are able to, i would recommend running. Simple, i know. But simple minded people don't know just how deep and complex running can be. I'm not going to explain why other than this. Requires same repetitive movement, exhaustion, force of all muscles to activate when exhausted, awareness of what doesn't work correctly. Hope you get the picture.

 

When running try to commit to running past exhaustion and therefore forcing to utilize formerly unaware of muscle groups. This is from the way you breathe, leg usage, upper body posture, head steadiness, etc, etc (things will break during this phase, but you will have gained new insight on what issues exist) Idea is to take 1 step back to take 2-3 steps forward.

 

Breaking is a part of the journey. Almost everything you do will  break what you are reconstructing. Sitting, running, walking, eating, sleeping, etc etc. This is because we got used to doing all these things with whatever physical posture we had and including with improper breathing. You'll need to start somewhere and asking if the way you're sitting or walking is correct. Do research on what's correct way to do things.

 

The last thing i'll leave you with for now is the feet represents the legs, the hands represents the arms, and the head represents the body. This may very well just be my own experience, but i believe fixing these connections is potentially at the root. Why? Becuase this is what is needed to function as a single unit, aka becoming one again.

 

I hope what you have is minor compared to mine.  Maybe my major injuries most likely make it harder for me to fix my body, but i've already gone a long way. Which is why i think you'll be just fine if you commit.

 

i'll give you a summary of the system i use when i have more time.

 

If you have any questions let me know.

 

 

Edited September 5, 2019 by welkin

[Gerard]

.

Edited September 5, 2019 by Gerard

[Gerard]

15 minutes ago, Gerard said:

 

I've been thinking of taking up a physical practice like tai chi. Do you think that's suitable, or too gentle?

 

Too gentle. Xingyi or Bagua are more aggressive but you'll also need to incorporate foundation exercises (ma bu, pu bu, Asian Squat etc.) in order to break mind-body blockages. Plenty of YouTube vids about it (check He Jing Han's channel, he is a Bagua teacher). 

 

Make sure you do hiking/walking from time to time to allow the 'Liver' to flush out gunk from your system.

 

*Edit: in any case you need to start with a good teacher and you need to put a considerable effort.

 

Expect a lifetime of work.

 

Studying/practising alone from the beginning only leads to failure or little gain. You can go on your own later one after studying with an experienced practitioner for several years. Please bear this in mind.

Edited September 5, 2019 by Gerard

[freeform]

19 hours ago, squashedface said:

None of the open sections of these tubes feel straight, as they curve or twist round and then disappear into a big lump of non-feeling, which is what I am referring to when I speak of a blockage.

 

So there is a lot of misunderstanding in these arts. that's worth clearing up.

 

What you describe is actually the case with most (99%) of people that first get into the internal arts.

 

What you've managed though is actually built the capacity to notice what is happening (which is good!)...

 

The issue is that you've then used your consciousness and breathwork to try and access and open these channels. Instead of opening channels, that's just created internal 'pressure' that is causing the pain and discomfort you describe.

 

The classical approach (from schools and lineages that have a long, successful track record) the approach is very different. You do not start with effortful breath work or using focused awareness to affect the channels. What you do is start with a physical approach of building 'the body' of a cultivator.

 

Before a pianist can add depth and creativity to her playing, she needs to build the necessary foundation - this generally involves years of repetitive work - building physical and mental dexterity with the hands and the piano, building a repertoire of melodies, chords and 'understandings' of what music is and how it works etc etc... then she is able to use all these fundamental principles to add depth and creativity to her performance...

 

What we tend to do in these arts is jump straight into depth and creativity without building the fundamentals. In piano playing there is direct feedback (it sounds awful), in the internal arts, there is very little feedback (usually just health issues down the line, or just nothing really happens).

 

'Building the body' in the internal arts basically means building the internal 'riverbeds' along which qi is able to travel. No one has perfect riverbeds - everyone's riverbeds are twisted, blocked, numb, invisible or going the wrong way. If we try to use consciousness to push through, we create issues. Physical approaches don't have the same problems - you use physical postures (standing) and movements (qi gong) to build, smooth out and develop these inner channels. This takes years - but they work.

 

The problem is that because you've focused attention into your blocked and undeveloped channels over a period of time, you've actually caused whats known as diversions - meaning things are flowing - but they're flowing incorrectly. Before you can start Qigong and standing, you must address this (and you can't address it with Qigong at this stage - attempting to do that will only cause more issues).

 

My suggestion is to stop all internal practice (which will stop pushing more 'juice' into the diversions). Then it's to do something very physical - anything that works with the muscles - swimming, running, bodyweight conditioning - anything like that. This moves the 'juice' away from the blocked channels into the 'outer' body - the muscles. It will take at the very least 3 to 6 months of work to achieve that. After that, when your pain and discomfort subside, and your qi moves to the surface, you can begin Qigong practice.

 

So there is some good news - 1. You're not uniquely messed up. 2. It's relatively easy to fix the issues. 3. You clearly have some talent.

 

The bad news - 1. It'll take a while to get back to step 1. 2. You'll have to start from the beginning again. 3 It will take some time.

 

Overall I think there is a lot of good news and only a bit of bad news.

 

PS - by far the worst thing you can do now is try to add 'alchemical practice' into the mix (although I don't think that's what Desmonddf was suggesting exactly)

 

 

[Desmonddf]

22 hours ago, squashedface said:

but by the time I had reached early adulthood

 

Either constitutional or the remains of invasion from perverse energy (Xie Qi). Did you get very sick very often as a kid? Obivously, I'm assuming you don't have a case of rickets - as doctors should be able to diagnose that.

 

22 hours ago, squashedface said:

By open meridians, I mean a feeling of a soft hollow tube within the body, through which energy and breath can pass (and by energy I mean the coarser kind such as that felt during sexual arousal, as well as the finer kind like the qi that arises when I cultivate a sense of emptiness; and by breath I mean the inner “embryonic” breath that arises when I make my breathing finer by creating gentle friction in the nose or throat and slowing down the rate of inhalation/exhalation).

 

You guys have found some veeeery weird cultivation practices in the last five hundred years. I'm used to looking at older stuff, so these new practices are alien to me, but I can see how it would work.

 

22 hours ago, squashedface said:

if I move my consciousness through my body, I find it impossible to follow a straight line at all,

 

The meridians aren't straight, though? They gently bend and move, even though twisting shouldn't be a thing. Areas in which there is a lack of consciousness indeed indicate a form of blockage, but not by excess of Qi, by lack of it.

Sensation comes from the Souls being in contact with Qi. That's why all forms of pain are Qi blockages. What happens in those "dead sensation zones" is that there's a blockage somewhere in the path of the channels that should be nourishing that area with Qi and that place will have a lack of it.

You should feel those places soft to the touch, cold and "empty" if that's the case.

 

22 hours ago, squashedface said:

but I then encounter a blockage (like a stone inside the hose or pressing on it further down) which prevents the additional movements needed for a full correction

 

Seems accurate with the idea of Qi blockages, indeed.

 

22 hours ago, squashedface said:

My throat area feels particularly tangled

 

Do you have problems to express yourself in arts, crafts or other forms of physical activity which carry metaphisical and/or psychological means ?

 

22 hours ago, squashedface said:

there’s pain on the right side of my upper back, also just inside the right hip area above my crooked leg,

 

Seems to be related to Yin-Yang balance between the sides of the body. Do you have some kind of dysplasia?

 

22 hours ago, squashedface said:

I have an inverted sternum/concave chest

 

Very typical constitutional disease, unless you have suffered some major trauma to the chest area.

 

22 hours ago, squashedface said:

s well as a few unusual lines and bumps on my skull,

 

Again, very common in constitutional diseases, unless you've cracked your skull multiple times.

 

22 hours ago, squashedface said:

Could this be connected with energy not going to the right places?

 

It's a signal of OBE with multiple energetic fluxes indirectly pulling yourself on opposite directions. So, yes, connected to energy and probably a general imbalance of Yin-Yang.

 

22 hours ago, squashedface said:

Can you give examples of "alchemy-based" practices?

 

Practices which induct change and transformation at the most base levels of the body. There are some phitoterapic formulas for that, but also some ways of working inside yourself.

 

Not classical daoist alchemy, as most of what has been passed outside of schools is a form of working neidan, but more having to do with awareness and changing the dense through the subtle.

 

Think of Consciousness and the Souls as Yang and the Body and Jing as Yin. Your Yin is crooked, deficient and not flowing correctly. If your Souls are sufficiently developed (which can be done without the use of Neidan), then you'll be able to use them to correct the body through transformation.

 

One such practice would be to draw your attention to yourself and access a few internal consciousness states which will allow you to see the bones and the body as a whole as a material possible to be transformed through tought. It is quite dangerous, but usable.

 

No connection to classical alchemy - only the process of "transformation and refinement". Therefore, not Alchemy itself, only Alchemy-Based techniques.

[Desmonddf]

3 minutes ago, Desmonddf said:

They gently bend and move, even though twisting shouldn't be a thing

 

For instance, the Spleen meridian starts at the toenail, barely half a milimeter under the skin.

 

Then, it flows gently through the feet and reaches the calf, where it's already around 1  to 2cm deep.

 

It keeps getting deeper until it reaches the groin, where it starts to become more superfitial again... so, it goes up and down in your body, sometimes deeper and sometimes closer to the surface. Inside, then outside, then inside again...

 

In this Image you should be able to see how not-straight it is, and that's still a very stiff representation of the spleen meridian. In actuality, it is much more curvalicious.

 

You'll need to study the pathway of the meridians in depth if you want to judge if what you're seeing is indeed an "incorrect" meridian or not.

 

Meridians aren't supposed to be straight, the same way a normal and anatomically correct body also isn't. There is always some small degree of curvature in every bone and tissue, and that's normal and desirable. Your case can be one of excess of curvatures and such, but that doesn't mean people should have perfectly straight bodies. That would kill them

@squashedface

[rideforever]

Hukuyu Butter Meditation, I recommend this as it is a true dissolving practice

https://buddhismnow.com/2015/09/12/zen-sickness-by-zen-master-hakuin/

 

Edited September 5, 2019 by rideforever

[squashedface]

17 hours ago, welkin said:

I've dealt with the things you've mentioned my entire life.

 

17 hours ago, welkin said:

There's so much that could be explained, but this is your own journey and you'll need to take it a step at a time.

 

Sorry to hear you've suffered similar problems. It's perfectly understandable that you don't want to encroach on another's personal journey too much by explaining everything, but I would certainly be keen to hear more about your experiences if you wish to share them, and I expect others would be too.

 

16 hours ago, welkin said:

What i will tell you is that you need to make a choice whether you want to commit a life to fixing this. Without it, you won't.

 

I can put up with a fair amount of physical discomfort as I've done so all my life - but the difference is that in the past I did it because I thought it was normal to feel it, while now I have much more awareness of the issues.

 

Just as I've had psychological realisations which compelled me to address a particular problem, like realising I was deluding myself and suffering because of it, I feel an equal obligation to fix the physical equivalent. When you realise, for instance, that every time you thought you were standing with both your feet flat on the ground, you were actually standing on the side of one of them due to your leg being crooked, your first thought is, "how on earth did I not notice that for 20-odd years?", but then you can't not be aware of it and you're forced to confront the problem one way or another.

 

A whole multitude of expensive and complicated tests performed over many years by Western doctors have provided no help whatsoever in this regard, but through journeying inwards and, in a sense, intensifying the problems, I now have enough awareness for it to no longer be an option to avoid spending a significant amount of time trying to resolve the issues. I'm in my late-30s, so I still have quite a bit of time left (hopefully).

 

17 hours ago, welkin said:

If you are able to, i would recommend running.

 

17 hours ago, welkin said:

When running try to commit to running past exhaustion and therefore forcing to utilize formerly unaware of muscle groups.

 

Thanks to the excellent advice received from everyone here I will certainly be looking into which intense physical activities I could take up as a way of strengthening/correcting the body. Somewhat ironically, the fact that I've suffered years of leg pain means that I see myself being far more able to push myself to the limit (for healing purposes) with running than with other activities. 

[squashedface]

On 05/09/2019 at 6:20 AM, Gerard said:

Studying/practising alone from the beginning only leads to failure or little gain. You can go on your own later one after studying with an experienced practitioner for several years. 

 

On 03/09/2019 at 9:25 AM, freeform said:

In 6 months time, just look for a legitimate teacher teaching a full system of development (not a collection of individual practices). Explain to them the issues you’ve had in the past, and they’ll be able to help.

 

Thanks so much for the helpful suggestions and advice, Gerard and freeform. I'll look into Xingyi, Bagua and the additional practices. The physical conditioning is clearly the priority for me now, and I hope to be able to find a reliable teacher offering a full system some time after that.

 

Adjacent to this, I may be beginning a year-long period as a probationer in an esoteric order in the not-too-distant future, where I'm encouraged to engage in as many of the approved exercises as possible, which includes asanas and breathing practices. If it happens sooner than the 3-to-6-month minimum correction period, do you think it's still too risky to do anything along those lines, even though I'll be under the supervision of an initiated neophyte? There are many alternative things to focus on in that time, and no obligation to do anything you don't want to, so it shouldn't be a problem to steer clear of them.

[freeform]

21 minutes ago, squashedface said:

do you think it's still too risky to do anything along those lines, even though I'll be under the supervision of an initiated neophyte?

 

Yeah - I’m afraid so. I recommend staying away from any ‘internal’ practice for a (very) minimum of 3 months.

 

It’s just not worth potentially causing yourself more issues. These things can become dangerous to you and others if you press ahead regardless. The majority of people in these arts do not understand the underlying processes and the issues that can come about as a result. That’s why lineage is of such importance - it’s a guarantee (as much as that’s possible) of having safe and correct methods that actually work. But sadly even here, many lineages are ‘dead’ or have diverted off the path. It’s a tricky business this cultivation!

 

I really hope you will overcome these issues soon. It’s certainly not fun to be stuck with chronic pain for so long.

[rideforever]

To things to watch for : (i) that the blockages do not particpate in the qigong  (ii) that the force you are using is  coming from the blockage's negativity.

Try a simple, systemic, reliable healing qigong and just keep doing it be very relaxed and soft.

Edited September 7, 2019 by rideforever

[squashedface]

On 05/09/2019 at 7:27 PM, Desmonddf said:

Did you get very sick very often as a kid? Obivously, I'm assuming you don't have a case of rickets - as doctors should be able to diagnose that.

 

I wasn't sick particularly often, no. Doctors haven't been able to diagnose whatever I do have, but the obvious stuff has been ruled out, so it's a no to rickets and hip dysplasia, and I've never suffered multiple skull fractures or trauma to the chest.

 

On 05/09/2019 at 7:27 PM, Desmonddf said:

Do you have problems to express yourself in arts, crafts or other forms of physical activity which carry metaphisical and/or psychological means ?

 

One thing I've never had a problem with (and even seemed to excel in from a very young age) is artistic expression. However, this is counterbalanced by a great deal of introversion in everyday situations, where I have often felt very hesitant, if not downright anxious, about expressing myself freely. I guess a block in the throat area is therefore not at all surprising.

 

On 05/09/2019 at 7:27 PM, Desmonddf said:

One such practice would be to draw your attention to yourself and access a few internal consciousness states which will allow you to see the bones and the body as a whole as a material possible to be transformed through tought. It is quite dangerous, but usable.

 

Dare I ask for further details on this practice? Is it similar to the White Skeleton Visualisation?

 

On 05/09/2019 at 7:40 PM, Desmonddf said:

You'll need to study the pathway of the meridians in depth if you want to judge if what you're seeing is indeed an "incorrect" meridian or not.

 

I have tried to do this, but I failed miserably due to the twists and blockages making it seem like I was trying to find Mr Messy's meridians. 

 

 

[squashedface]

On 06/09/2019 at 6:59 PM, freeform said:

Yeah - I’m afraid so. I recommend staying away from any ‘internal’ practice for a (very) minimum of 3 months.

 

I thought that might be the case. I will have to focus on other things for as long as possible then.

 

On 06/09/2019 at 6:59 PM, freeform said:

I really hope you will overcome these issues soon. It’s certainly not fun to be stuck with chronic pain for so long.

 

Thanks for your kindness and encouragement 

[squashedface]

On 06/09/2019 at 10:11 PM, rideforever said:

To things to watch for : (i) that the blockages do not particpate in the qigong  (ii) that the force you are using is  coming from the blockage's negativity.

 

This sounds like excellent advice. How do I ensure those things, though?

[Desmonddf]

On 06/09/2019 at 6:12 PM, squashedface said:

Dare I ask for further details on this practice? Is it similar to the White Skeleton Visualisation?

 

Not exactly. I'll give you more details in case I'm permited.

 

On 06/09/2019 at 6:12 PM, squashedface said:

I have tried to do this, but I failed miserably due to the twists and blockages making it seem like I was trying to find Mr Messy's meridians. 

 

 

hahaha. Let's go into it later then