My personal hell, kundalini, kidney energy deficiency, neuropathy/ damaged meridians., Looking for help!

[DodgeFreeman]

58 minutes ago, virtue said:

 

It's unethical of you to give (or actually more accurately: push without consent) detailed nutritional counsel to any person whose constitution and actual condition you are not fit to assess. Even if you were a practicing nutritionist, you simply aren't diagnosing anything remotely on an Internet forum.

Just offering advice the person can take or leave it. I didn't push anything. An seems like you're u need to check your ego. Unless you're a moderator of some type here on the forum and I broke a rule, chill with the criticism.  I legit was in meditation an felt a negativity projected at me an traced it to my phone, an the response to this. Dude know that your emotions project and that at ur level, it can cause issues in others. So train your self discipline for the sake of other ppl u interact with, an learn to not project unless you want too.  That being said, if that advice is somehow not allowed, then petition the moderators to remove it. An moderators, let me know if it is an actual issue. Let's be adults, not criticism junkies. That's the end of it. Sorry to interrupt your thread with this nonsense guy asking for help.

[DodgeFreeman]

On 8/12/2020 at 11:35 AM, manitou said:

I've been K-active for many years.  I have gotten used to the constant buzzing and weirdness.  I'm not sure I've ever read anything that really gives a good answer as to Why the K-energy arises.  I've participated in K-forums.    But does anybody have a real answer as to why this develops, and what it's good for?   I imagine it has something to do with development of the third eye

It arises as the intention for personal growth is stimulated somehow. Could be an opportunity. It's the quintessence of all you are and have absorbed into your being, and all that potential. So it's semi intelligent an does its own thing til it reaches ur conciousness an merges there, eventually cycling thru ur being til it exhausts itself upgrading you. Then over time it replenishes itself an can be cultivated again.  It's similar to but not the same as Tao Cultivation primal qi, at least how I understand it through personal growth experience.

[senseless virtue]

26 minutes ago, DodgeFreeman said:

Just offering advice the person can take or leave it. I didn't push anything.

 

Your advice was completely unsolicited and still remains completely unethical.

 

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An seems like you're u need to check your ego.

 

No, you first.

 

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Unless you're a moderator of some type here on the forum and I broke a rule, chill with the criticism.

 

I can be as critical as I want within the limits of forum rules. You say you are offering golden advice, I say you were offering turds.

 

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I legit was in meditation an felt a negativity projected at me an traced it to my phone, an the response to this.

 

Funny. Meditation and spiritual growth is conventionally aimed for the dropping and leaving of negativity and involvement in such matters, but what did you do by your own account? Straight after finishing you took the phone, found out that someone had posted an disagreeable opinion, and eagerly jumped back into the cycle of negativity you are trying shrug off. How is meditation working for you anyway then?

 

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Dude know that your emotions project and that at ur level, it can cause issues in others.

 

I'm sorry if my (lack of?) level is causing you to experience issues.

 

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So train your self discipline for the sake of other ppl u interact with, an learn to not project unless you want too.

 

Want that too from you? Wow, give me all you got, show me your true level of projection!

 

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That being said, if that advice is somehow not allowed, then petition the moderators to remove it.

 

No, I wish everyone to examine your discernment in public view.

 

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Let's be adults, not criticism junkies. That's the end of it.

 

It's alright, criticism can be very fun, too. Through it we are going on a happy ride where only friendly smiles and laughter reside.

 

 

Honk, honk!

Edited September 8, 2020 by virtue

[DodgeFreeman]

12 minutes ago, virtue said:

 

Your advice was completely unsolicited and still remains completely unethical.

 

 

No, you first.

 

 

I can be as critical as I want within the limits of forum rules. You say you are offering golden advice, I say you were offering turds.

 

 

Funny. Meditation and spiritual growth is conventionally aimed for the dropping and leaving of negativity and involvement in such matters, but what did you do by your own account? Straight after finishing you took the phone, found out that someone had posted an disagreeable opinion, and eagerly jumped back into the cycle of negativity you are trying shrug off. How is meditation working for you anyway then?

 

 

I'm sorry if my (lack of?) level is causing you to experience issues.

 

 

Want that too from you? Wow, give me all you got, show me your true level of projection!

 

 

No, I wish everyone to examine your discernment in public view.

 

 

It's alright, criticism can be very fun, too. Through it we are going on a happy ride where only friendly smiles and laughter reside.

 

 

Honk, honk!

Hey Cloud444 ppl like the person above try to drain ur energy an throw their crap onto you. They are usually ignorant and don't know what they are doing. But here's a technique. 

Think of that person an here should be a weird warm feeling somewhere usually chest or head, that's how they try to dump their garbage into u. Then u sense it an send back all the foulness they sendin ur way, kinda like grounding. An then u pull in everything good they have in them to u. This rebalances u and weakens them. Then you take that connection and sever it with swordfinger. Focus ur energy on ur dantian then send it through to ur aura til it feels good. It's like suing someone an taking payment an using it to repair the damages. 

They vampire this way because they're too weak to cultivate so they try to feed on others, trolls of energy lol.

Hope this helps.

[senseless virtue]

6 minutes ago, DodgeFreeman said:

Think of that person an here should be a weird warm feeling somewhere usually chest or head, that's how they try to dump their garbage into u. Then u sense it an send back all the foulness they sendin ur way, kinda like grounding. An then u pull in everything good they have in them to u. This rebalances u and weakens them.

 

You talk about others draining you, but then you give instructions in the above quote how to do energetic vampirism under the guise of retaliation. It's not just your nutritional advice that is unethical.

Edited September 8, 2020 by virtue

[DodgeFreeman]

13 minutes ago, virtue said:

 

You talk about others draining you, but then you give instructions in the above quote how to do energetic vampirism under the guise of retaliation. It's not just your nutritional advice that is unethical.

There's no ethics when it comes to life or death. Openly an unrepentantly attacking someone's energy is the same as threatening their life. Unaware ppl can be excused to a degree, you are aware of what you're doing so it cannot be excused an is taken for what it is.

Taking someone's energy is a challenge for their power an life. You continue to challenge, unprovoked. I defend myself an reclaimed what was mine. I'm not here for challenges by useless fleas, so this matter is dropped. If brought up again, I will not reply in forum.

[DodgeFreeman]

Again sorry for the disrespect in your thread. 

[thelerner]

Everyone Settle Down, stop with all personal assaults and accusations.

 

The bigger picture, when someone has problems and asks for advice on a public forum like this one, they will get it.  Some good- and there were some very good advice and resources mentioned early on, by people with experience.  You'll also get all kinds of advice, good, bad and dangerous. 

 

If you think someone's advice is dangerous, no problem calling it out,  but do it without trolling or getting personal.   With esoteric problems it can be very hard to say what will work and it is best to go with a professional.  Though with problems like kundalini, just who is professional is usually in dispute. 

 

the mods 

 

[markern]

Damo Mitchel has made a video with a series of a few stretching exercises and a short self massage sequence designed to help people with Chi Deviation. This is the link to the video but in order to access it I think you need to subscribe to his monthly Nei Gong program. If so then subscribe for one month, learn the sequence and then cancel the subscription as Freeform is likely right that you need to step back from energywork. Damo advices that as well:

https://www.facebook.com/watch/?v=3034889196738071

I highly recommend exercising core muscles and gaining precise control of your core muscles they  way you do through for example Pilates. The more you are connected to and move from your core muscles the more your energy will sink to the abdomen and through that stop bothering you so much. It takes time but it works. 

Very slow ankle rotations builds a rooted energy and pulls your energy and awareness towards your ankles which helps ground you.

Intu Flow by Scott Sonnon has, at least for me and one other guy with serious chi deviation, helped with grounding, embodiment, reducing tension and increasing relaxation and unblocking energy in a way that did not exacerbate energy imbalances. 

Squats help ground me a lot (but I can't do them much because of my knees) but I know at least one other person that found it increased his energy imbalances. Try them out and see how they work for you.

 

[markern]

I have also found that standing for long stretches while fishing helps in a similar way as standing meditation but without the aggravation of energy that can come through standing meditation. They key is that when I stand while fishing I don't bring my mind to my energy as I do when I do standing meditation, so the energy isn't stimulated in the same way. But because I do stand energy starts to go down as it normally would in standing meditation. So try fishing or anything else that makes you stand for fairly long without going into a standing meditation "mindset". Just do the activity and focus on that not the energy.

Walking for (reasonably) long stretches also helps a lot if it is regular enough. 

[markern]

You can also try this technique:

Bring your awareness towards your muscles and skin. Notice that there is both sensations that feel physical, gross and sort of "meaty" and there are sensations that feel more energy/chi like wherever you feel into your body. Then focus your awareness more and more towards the gross, physical, meaty, flesh like sensations and NOT the feelings of energy. Whenever awareness goes towards the movements of your energy, bring your attention gently over to the physical, flesh sensations in your muscles and skin. 

This CAN work. But it may also initially work a bit but then make things worse. The key is are you able to switch awareness towards the gross physical sensations and away from energy. When I manage to switch towards the muscles almost all the energy imbalances just disappear. But doing any sort of awareness exercise might still make things worse if you can't properly switch attention. And then you need to rely on doing lots of physical activity over a long period of time to have this awareness shift happen by itself through activity.

Edited September 12, 2020 by markern

[markern]

You can also contact Tao Semko for help. He is known to be quite skilled at helping people work through those kinds of imbalances:

https://taosemko.com/mentorship-program/

[Takingcharge]

Is there really nothing else or nowhere else this person can reach out to? Theres got to be somewhere right

 

Clearly hes in a very bad place, even having nerve damage, with not much of a plan or any idea besides masturbating to keep it down. 

i doubt he has been doing his walks in his condition

 

Is there really nobody that can help this person? That he can consult? Theres gotta be somebody thats skilled, knowledged and in the open? That he can reach out to

 

 

im very sorry that you’re going through this man. i really hope That you find your way out  of this, get the help that you need and return yourself to health!

Edited September 16, 2020 by Takingcharge

[freeform]

1 hour ago, Takingcharge said:

Is there really nobody that can help this person?

Any assistance is a two way street. Not everyone is ready to be helped. 
 

There are many causes behind chronic issues. Things are rarely very simple.

 

One of the big impediments is that there are some big payoffs to being unwell... not needing to take responsibility, not having to work hard or strive, gaining attention and empathy from people, feeling special and unusual, letting yourself off the hook for things, not having to face up to your own delusions or wrong thinking and acting, supporting your preferences and addictions etc etc.

 

I reached out with specific advice - he said he’s doing everything already.
 

I highly doubt it. I’ve met very few people who’re able to consistently do everything I suggested over a long period. 

 

I imagine he’s actually doing very little of what I suggested. Our memories tend to work in a funny way...

 

Ask someone ‘do you eat healthy food?’ and their mind jumps to specific memories of having eaten healthy food. So the answer is a yes.

Ask them to keep an accurate food diary for a month and the truth is that once in a while they’ll have a healthy meal - but the majority of the time their diet is anything but healthy.

 

Its the same with sleep, exercise, keeping mental and emotional stimulation down etc.
 

One’s memory of attempting to start a workout routine for a week often generalises into ‘of course I exercise’.

 

Simple things are hard to implement and hard to make them a consistent, regular habit - a part of who you are. But often that is exactly what would help most. 
 

Trying to help someone who isn’t prepared to face the truth of their situation is almost impossible. Especially online.

 

Even doing specific treatments - while they may help to change the direction of development down a better path - the responsibility of keeping on the new, healthy path is in the patient’s hands. 

[welkin]

On 7/2/2020 at 7:26 PM, cloud444 said:

this is a long story, and im looking for help or anyone that can send me in the right direction. Im going to sum It up as short as I can. When I was younger I abused alcohol and weed, and was always tired. Really draining my Jing at a young age. Later on I went through benzo withdrawal trying to get off pills I really drained the Jing there as well. Where I am now. I had a very very bad head injury that lead me to develop a minor type of epilepsy, then I had to go on more shitty seizure pills that drain yin and Jing. Western medicine wouldn't help me and after a year I did meditation, deep breathing and yoga without knowing what I was doing ( thinking I would heal my body ) My kundalini one day arose and I had a lot of psychic phenonema, dreams of snakes, out of body experience and too much prana or whatever in the body. Once you open this up it won't go away I soon discovered, But the snake only risen half way through my chakras and not piercing the heart.  so as long as I did masturbation it would go down and stay away. . Finally the snake went down and all my symptoms went away after about 4 months of grounding. I am now left with a frail damaged body, with no energy,. Low kidney energy and it literally hurts to get an erection in my lower back, all my joints ache and crack. The only way to keep the kundalini away is too masturbate at least once a week and it will stay away, if I dont then ill start to have dreams of snakes and bliss at my spine and it will start to raise again, but if I DO masturbate ONLY once within a week or so then ill get extreme bad pains in why lower back due to low Jing/ kidney energy and I kept doing this because I felt sooo scared and just sick of living life and not wanting to go through a kundalini awakening while being so ill. I kept doing this for 2 years after it awakened but basically laid in bed. Eventually because of all the emotional stress, my yin Jing or yin went too low and my back pains were so bad it damaged all my nerves permanently. I now have constant, numbness tingling, burning in all my limbs. In Chinese medicine its called bi or Wei syndrome and it permanent and for life and its getting worse starting to make my muscles weak. SO my situation now is this, very low Jing and kidney yin, damaged kidney essence and damaged meridians, it is constant and stuck in bed and the neuropathy is growing and now affecting my limbs as well and my eyesight. Also if I dont masturbate at all my kundalini tries to raise again and I dont want to go through it. IM NOT abusing my sexual energy, its just my kidney energy is so low that I cant even do it once in a couple weeks. Im so screwed because I cant dig my way out of this. I worked SO hard to try and be healthy and heal and balance my body, but now that this Wei syndrome or bi syndrome has started because of all the meridians being damaged and damaging my nerves I dont have It in my to move forward. I consulted with some Chinese medicine people and they say that I can't reverse the nerve problem. So whats the point in even going through with the awakening if im going to be like this forever. I avoided the awakening because before it happened I had suffered for 7 years and just wanted freedom. Being slapped with an awakening and to go through more hell I would have rather died, but now my situation is even way worse. I feel helpless and my body is degernating with nothing I can do about it. I try to be positive and work towards fixing it but whats the point if its degenerating faster then I can fix

 

@cloud444, Are you still returning here? I may i have solutions for you, but i'm not going to write it out unless i know you're here. As it's detailed and would take me putting a lot of my own practices out there for know-it-alls to criticize. Every person is born different, and the opportunities to use methods are not the same for everyone. Sometimes you're the only one who can figure out how to heal yourself because your condition is unique at birth. It goes past, techniques, theories, knowledge made for the masses. It's a deeper journey, that only you can experience and know. It doesn't mean you don't use others' knowledge, techniques, and understanding, but it does mean you need to integrate them with your own intuition, ability, and predestined journey to heal yourself.

 

Let me know if you're on and I will write it all out.

 

 

[Takingcharge]

On 16-9-2020 at 3:41 PM, freeform said:

Any assistance is a two way street. Not everyone is ready to be helped. 
 

There are many causes behind chronic issues. Things are rarely very simple.

 

One of the big impediments is that there are some big payoffs to being unwell... not needing to take responsibility, not having to work hard or strive, gaining attention and empathy from people, feeling special and unusual, letting yourself off the hook for things, not having to face up to your own delusions or wrong thinking and acting, supporting your preferences and addictions etc etc.

 

I reached out with specific advice - he said he’s doing everything already.
 

I highly doubt it. I’ve met very few people who’re able to consistently do everything I suggested over a long period. 

 

I imagine he’s actually doing very little of what I suggested. Our memories tend to work in a funny way...

 

Ask someone ‘do you eat healthy food?’ and their mind jumps to specific memories of having eaten healthy food. So the answer is a yes.

Ask them to keep an accurate food diary for a month and the truth is that once in a while they’ll have a healthy meal - but the majority of the time their diet is anything but healthy.

 

Its the same with sleep, exercise, keeping mental and emotional stimulation down etc.
 

One’s memory of attempting to start a workout routine for a week often generalises into ‘of course I exercise’.

 

Simple things are hard to implement and hard to make them a consistent, regular habit - a part of who you are. But often that is exactly what would help most. 
 

Trying to help someone who isn’t prepared to face the truth of their situation is almost impossible. Especially online.

 

Even doing specific treatments - while they may help to change the direction of development down a better path - the responsibility of keeping on the new, healthy path is in the patient’s hands. 

yeah those are all good points,

 

but you gotta appreciate though how he may have kinda lost hope, his own body fighting against him, messing him up everyday, exhaustion, in pain  - no clear path out.   Not knowing wtf to do, Being in 2 years deep.

 

he may have not seen the point of being extremely consistent and following it to the tee.

 

Its true that there are many secundary gain from being unwell

 

but you also shouldnt underestimate the power or the damage of lack of vision, hope, and belief, Not thinking a way out is possible not seeing any light at the end of the tunnel basking in defeat and learned helplessness

 

thats a real shitty place to be in and tough love isnt always the right way to approach that.

 

i could relate to his situation

he Just didnt  really seem in a place to start proactively engaging in all kinds of plans.

 

 

On 16-9-2020 at 3:41 PM, freeform said:

Even doing specific treatments - while they may help to change the direction of development down a better path - the responsibility of keeping on the new, healthy path is in the patient’s hands. 

some extra help in the right direction via some kind of treatment

 

or maybe just the support and certainty on some kind of path forwards may be just that thing that helps him holdon, hang in there and ultimately find his way out.

he doesnt seem to visit the forum anymore however so its not much use amyway

 

i hope he finds his way out

 

 

[z00se]

I remember having massive anxiety at one stage that was uncontrollable after my surgeon said I might have to have my foot amputated. I remember not sleeping at all for like 5 days and it was unbearable.

 

I agree with what others have said on facing the fear, when the sensations come just ask it "comon then, what are you going to do c**t" to the overwhelming sensations. Let it do it's best. Look I wouldn't say it's fun and I'd rather take another way but it worked, repeating it and gaining confidence the sensations subsided. Once u do it once u know you can do it and have that skill in your back pocket.

 

Then put your attention on the physical. If u want watch the physical sensations of the breath around your nose and let the air going through your nostrils feel like your hand gently stroking a cat's back to sleep, calming your mind. Sensations will come as you start to relax, but just tell yourself the sensations are not the meditation, bring your attention back to the nose. 15minutes at a time is enough 2 or 3x a day. 

 

Dont pay any attention to the sensations or they will get stronger.

 

Best of luck.

[freeform]

14 hours ago, Takingcharge said:

i hope he finds his way out

Me too

[manitou]

On 9/8/2020 at 11:27 AM, ralis said:

 

 

Medical advice is too freely given here from persons that are not qualified!

 

 

I agree fully.

But have you ever tried to explain your symptoms to an MD?  

[cloud444]

On 2020-08-15 at 1:48 PM, ralis said:

Perhaps some will understand what I am about to say and most likely anything I say will fall on deaf ears.

 

Why does anyone here believe that kundalini can be owned? In reading the above posts, some refer to kundalini as 

"my kundalini." No one owns any cosmic force and in this case, kundalini. Furthermore, kundalini awakening is a rare phenomenon.

 

There is only one piece of wisdom that one must take to heart regarding cosmic forces. You don't own it or control it!

 

This is all the advice I will offer which is a warning for anyone that believes that kundalini is kiddy play! It is not!

 

I have been through the worst of this phenomenon and therefore I speak from experience. It is as if I was going into the great abyss.

 

 

when i said "my kundalini" i was clearly saying it so that i could talk about what was going on in MY body. stop the spiritual ego babble. i never once stated i was using it or misusing it did i? NO i was just talking about what was going on. 

[dwai]

On 11/17/2021 at 4:59 AM, cloud444 said:

when i said "my kundalini" i was clearly saying it so that i could talk about what was going on in MY body. stop the spiritual ego babble. i never once stated i was using it or misusing it did i? NO i was just talking about what was going on. 

How are you doing these days? I hope things have gotten better for you?

[cloud444]

On 2021-11-18 at 11:21 AM, dwai said:

How are you doing these days? I hope things have gotten better for you?

I never recovered. the neuropathy got worse and destroyed the nerves in my pelvic region. all throughout my penis and i cant even get an erection anymore. i hate the kundalini for what its done to me. everyday i lay in bed on fire head to toe, and even the nerves in my dick destroyed now. soon i want to die. i will never forgive the kundalini for what it has done, and i hate god and this universe. i will never contribute to this place. im waiting for my grandfather to get killed by his terrible disease ALS god gave him, and i will die shortly after. im only 30 but there is no life left for me. i cannot be free or procreate. all because i didnt want to be controlled by kundalini my entire life. i hope i am sent to hell, because i will spit in gods face if given the chance. i hate this world

[old3bob]

 

I suggest looking up Gopi Krishna if you have not already?   "Living with Kundalini": The Autobiography of Gopi Krishna (Shambhala Dragon Editions) Paperback – November 9, 1993 at Amazon.  There is (or was?) an organization related to his works and people there that might be able to help you in whatever ways?

 

I don't remember if it was this book or another one of his where he goes into great detail about Kundalini gone very wrong  (even though he meant well) and it burning him up... which he very fortunately mitigated and overcame through included descriptions.  There are true and advanced Kundalini masters who can catch Kundalini so to speak, but they are maybe one in several million people, thus I'd say not easy to find but hopefully possible for you.  

 

 

[cloud444]

6 minutes ago, old3bob said:

 

I suggest looking up Gopi Krishna if you have not already?   "Living with Kundalini": The Autobiography of Gopi Krishna (Shambhala Dragon Editions) Paperback – November 9, 1993 at Amazon.  There is (or was?) an organization related to his works and people there that might be able to help you in whatever ways?

 

I don't remember if it was this book or another one of his where he goes into great detail about Kundalini gone very wrong  (even though he meant well) and it burning him up... which he very fortunately mitigated and overcame through included descriptions.  There are true and advanced Kundalini masters who can catch Kundalini so to speak, but they are maybe one in several million people, thus I'd say not easy to find but hopefully possible for you.  

 

 

Thanks but its honestly pointless at this point. im 30 and lost my 20s to illness. I finally got healed and this decided to damage me again to control me. a kundalini awakening takes 10 years to complete on average. you think. I will be satisfied with this when im 40? wasting all that time being controlled? I HATE the kundalini. it took away my ability to have sex and gave me neuropathy. I can NOT forgive this energy, this life is wash. theres nothing left for me. 

[awaken]

這些現象不是Kundalini，而是陽氣

陽氣和Kundalini不是一回事

這裡很多人都搞錯了

你應該找一個分得清楚什麼是Kundalini和陽氣的老師

而不是找一個根本分不清楚什麼是Kundalini和陽氣有何不同的老師

 

用呼吸去激發下腹部的陽氣是非常危險的事情

容易導致早洩

這一點很多中國人都在ＱＱ上面反應過了

但是在這裡，你是我第一個聽到的人

我很高興你很誠實

因為必須先有誠實，才有解決的辦法

 

我的建議很簡單，你必須放棄這個用呼吸去激發下腹部陽氣的方法

你只要放鬆的感受你的身體的存在，找一個公園，輕鬆地讓身體移動，讓雙手移動，讓雙腳移動，按照身體自己的節奏，傾聽身體的聲音

如果你做得到這一點，能令你恢復健康的氣，就會慢慢產生

 

These phenomena are not Kundalini, but yang Qi

Yang Qi and Kundalini are not the same thing

A lot of people here get it wrong

You should find a teacher who can distinguish between Kundalini and Yang Qi

Instead of finding a teacher who can't tell the difference between Kundalini and Yang Qi at all

It is very dangerous to use breathing to stimulate the yang qi in the lower abdomen

prone to premature ejaculation

Many Chinese people have already reacted to this on QQ.

But here you are the first person I hear

I'm glad you're honest

Because there must be honesty before there can be a solution

 

My advice is very simple, you must give up this method of using breathing to stimulate the yang energy in the lower abdomen

Just relax and feel the presence of your body, find a park, easily move your body, move your hands, move your feet, listen to your body at its own rhythm

If you can do this, the chi that restores your health will slowly develop