Neec some advice Panic Attacks out of fear that my heart w

[Takingcharge]

Good day people,

 

i seem to have done a bit of a number on myself

i seem to have developed a pretty serious case of panick attacks in a short amount of time. And would like to ask for input and advice, i need to get passed this.

 

plz note that while this probably reads really dumb and  Stupid this has been a serious debilitating issue. For 11 days at this point.

 

The panick started when i started 

 

A while back mental processes, and visualisation processes started getting out of hand during a period of extreme mental fog,  basicly i was being displaced out of my mind so automated patterns started to run themselves without me interferring or correcting it,       And i started to fear that i would accidently intend unhealthy things.

This is how it started.

 

>i started to become afraid that i might affect my heart accidently 

>i became afraid of it

>i tought i accidently affected my heart with my thinking
>then i became extremely scared of my toughts to avoid doing it again

>but the more you fight your toughts the more they fight back to get expressed

>eventually i lost and tought it again with more severity and got a more severe responce on my heart

i started to freak out in fear because i didnt have controll.   I felt all kinds of sensations i couldnt keep track of it all

it spiralled out of controll, couldnt breathe, entire body tight, Blurry vision   Called an ambulance

 

went to the e.r twice 

they decided to have me there for the night

I had panick attacks through the sleeping pill in a drug spacing haze

And then panick attacks in the following days staying up for 17 hours

getting woken up in my sleep with panic

 

it had quite a run of constant activating - being retriggering and building  - stopping -retriggering etc a perfect way to quickly train up a big web of bad asociations well rehearsed responces, responsiveness 

 

It just kept going because it was  my own thinking triggering it, it became a self enforcing loop i couldnt escape from.
i was afraid that i was gonna accidently stop my heart, 

i ordered measuring tools whitch helped me objectvely identify big chunk  of symptoms as “stress/panic responce”  and not real.

i found some ashwaganda calm caps that allowed me to get some foodhold back. It diminished the high alert state i couldnt escape from.  During that i got to regain some bearings and notice alot of sensations were just useless sensations and reprocess

since then the “0 to a 100” severe  panic responces ive gotten out.

but i havent won yet,

its become rather ocd

 

-im still afraid of thinking the wrong things,

-theres still a chunk  of involuntaryfear responces that re-triggers the whole web, that launch me into it,   

-im afraid if i might start thinking this to long and start believing it to strong it might actually get dangerous

i had some pretty serious fright responces

-i have a nervous system issue that creates all kinds of sensations and pressures  that makes it harder to think things are ok 
 

 

So on reflecting what im afraid of. 

 

-i visualised a cut in my finger and felt pain and lasceration in my finger for an hour or so.  This started the becoming afraid of my own thinking.

-i seem to now be afraid of even thinking words, like heart.  Or heart attack or stop your heart,,

 

-That pressure sensation that sits on my heart erea, but isnt actually my heart.  Its most likely nerve and some kind of muscle tissue but it feels inside my chest. And when it moves to my heart erea it scares the shit out of me.    
 

So  im just trying to confront it, and stay with it, i start feeling sudden pressure in my chest, then  the built up involuntary fear responces get triggered.  And i get filled with fear.  
 
-then im afraid  that if i stay with it in that fear not having controll of it believing something might happen, that something might actually happen because of that

 

-i had my heart slow down abrubtly a couple of times only to return back to rhytm, thats what started the beginning of it, together with those strong pressure sensations on that erea

 

I think the slowing down of the heart was most likely just caused by me feeding a fright responce into the system.  Rather then then the action that was performed

 

how do i best move forward and rid myself of this completely?

 

thanks for your input!

 

 

Edited December 20, 2020 by Takingcharge

[idiot_stimpy]

I'm sorry you're in a state of distress.

 

Quote

-im still afraid of thinking the wrong things,

 

Stop fearing the fear itself. You're creating fear on top of fear. 

 

Quote

but the more you fight your toughts the more they fight back to get expressed

 

So if the fear and thoughts come, don't fight. Surrender to the feeling of fear. Just watch them passively without fighting them. I don't mean you must act out the thoughts, just passively watch them. Surrender into the uncomfortable feeling and you will liberate this energy.

 

I wish you wellness.

Edited December 20, 2020 by idiot_stimpy

[Maddie]

I think you need to get a therapist if things are that bad, and see a doctor.

Edited December 20, 2020 by dmattwads

[Takingcharge]

1 hour ago, dmattwads said:

I think you need to get a therapist if things are that bad, and see a doctor.

 

Hah, yeah it got real bad real quick, thats for sure,   It was not fun. 
 

Dont let the backstory fool you however,   A big part of this ive  resolved now. Im just very bad at deciding what to exclude and include i always end up telling every detail of the story. Due to perfectionism. Its an Issue.

 

the thing is

I tought i was really dying, my entire body got tight, trouble breathing and my wrist pulse as well as jugular pulse would get fainter and weaker in sync with the rate of getting tighter - so that made it pretty scary.  
as soon as that got ruled out by the doctor. meaning The pulse is still there if you put the blood pressure band on and wait. Along with some extra checks with my own equipment i was able to start taking back controll.

together with the ashwaganda to calm down my body enough.

 

So the worst part is over.

 

BUT i need to uproot it completely,   im left with the artifacts of it.

if i dont eradicate this pattern completely from my system it will at some point  repeat itself or otherwise cause disruption.

 

 

ive made the ask for a therapist,  not because im such a huge fan,  but because i could really use  a feedback mechanism In this.

its basicly has become a form of ocd

so theres a protocol for unwiring it.

however the waiting lists are useless whitch is why im asking advice Here

 

Im winning, but i need it fully uprooted.

 

-ive seen the doctor as well.

 

 

what i seem to be running into now, 

is 

 

 

[Maddie]

13 minutes ago, Takingcharge said:

 

Hah, yeah it got real bad real quick, thats for sure,   It was not fun. 
 

Dont let the backstory fool you however,   A big part of this ive  resolved now. Im just very bad at deciding what to exclude and include i always end up telling every detail of the story. Due to perfectionism. Its an Issue.

 

the thing is

I tought i was really dying, my entire body got tight, trouble breathing and my wrist pulse as well as jugular pulse would get fainter and weaker in sync with the rate of getting tighter - so that made it pretty scary.  
as soon as that got ruled out by the doctor. meaning The pulse is still there if you put the blood pressure band on and wait. Along with some extra checks with my own equipment i was able to start taking back controll.

together with the ashwaganda to calm down my body enough.

 

So the worst part is over.

 

BUT i need to uproot it completely,   im left with the artifacts of it.

if i dont eradicate this pattern completely from my system it will at some point  repeat itself or otherwise cause disruption.

 

 

ive made the ask for a therapist,  not because im such a huge fan,  but because i could really use  a feedback mechanism In this.

its basicly has become a form of ocd

so theres a protocol for unwiring it.

however the waiting lists are useless whitch is why im asking advice Here

 

Im winning, but i need it fully uprooted.

 

-ive seen the doctor as well.

 

 

what i seem to be running into now, 

is 

 

 

 

As an acupuncturist I might be biased but I was suggest going to see an acupuncturist there's quite a bit that can be done with acupuncture and herbs in stitutions like this.

[Limahong]

8 hours ago, idiot_stimpy said:

Surrender into the uncomfortable feeling and you will liberate this energy.

 

Hi idiot_stimpy,

 

From the way he writes ~ he is taking charge.

 

- Anand

 

[Limahong]

6 hours ago, dmattwads said:

acupuncturist

 

Hi dmattwads,

 

Is the puncture from 'acupuncture' as a general/generic term acute?

 

- Anand

 

 

[Maddie]

1 minute ago, Limahong said:

 

Hi dmattwads,

 

Is the puncture from 'acupuncture' as a general/generic term acute?

 

- Anand

 

 

 

It's descriptive, as in the needles "puncture" the skin.

[Limahong]

1 minute ago, dmattwads said:

It's descriptive, as in the needles "puncture" the skin.

 

Hi dmattwads,

 

I am thinking of prescriptive acupuncture.

 

 

 

- Anand

 

[welkin]

8 hours ago, Takingcharge said:

 

-i visualised a cut in my finger and felt pain and lasceration in my finger for an hour or so.  This started the becoming afraid of my own thinking.

 

-i seem to now be afraid of even thinking words, like heart.  Or heart attack or stop your heart,,

 

-That pressure sensation that sits on my heart erea, but isnt actually my heart.  Its most likely nerve and some kind of muscle tissue but it feels inside my chest. And when it moves to my heart erea it scares the shit out of me.    
 

So  im just trying to confront it, and stay with it, i start feeling sudden pressure in my chest, then  the built up involuntary fear responces get triggered.  And i get filled with fear.  
 
-then im afraid  that if i stay with it in that fear not having controll of it believing something might happen, that something might actually happen because of that

 

-i had my heart slow down abrubtly a couple of times only to return back to rhytm, thats what started the beginning of it, together with those strong pressure sensations on that erea

 

I think the slowing down of the heart was most likely just caused by me feeding a fright responce into the system.  Rather then then the action that was performed

 

how do i best move forward and rid myself of this completely?

 

thanks for your input!

 

 

 

I would say it's not about trying to control, instead direct your intent. If you know in your heart you only want the best for yourself and as a result others, assert that you wouldn't hurt yourself. Tell yourself powerfully that you love yourself and there's nothing you would do to harm yourself. Then let it go. You don't need to control, you simply need to create the intention and things will work out on their own.

 

Whenever you mind decides to start making noise with thoughts, simply observe. You don't need to confront or "stop". Just observe it as if it is communicating on its own, you will know what to do or not do after.

 

 

[Limahong]

5 minutes ago, welkin said:

Just observe it as if it is communicating on its own, you will know what to do or not do after.

 

Beautifully simple.

 

 

[thelerner]

my wife had panic attacks.  It can be a tough nut to crack by yourself.  It's as if a deep program, a stupid one is running and you're powerless to stop it.  What helped her was finding a behavioral therapist who prescribed awareness of the triggers, relaxation techniques, a few self hypnotic scripts and strong muscle relaxants.  

 

The good news is, once they stopped, they've been gone for good.  A few times she felt them coming on, used all the tools, body relaxation (piece by piece) and took a muscle relaxant.  It didn't many disruptions to stop the programming. 

 

You could replicate some of it.  Check online for some good yoga nidras.  They are excellent for learning relaxation techniques.  see https://www.yoganidranetwork.org/downloads for many free samples.   See if any connect to you.  Think about the triggers, be mindful of them.  See if you can get a prescription of muscle relaxants or see the strongest over the counter.

 

Good luck.

 

 

[freeform]

Regular daily walks. Spending time with others. Get your mind out of all this and into something outside of you. 
 

The most powerful advice (but one that is almost always not taken by anyone) is to find a way to volunteer your time to help others less fortunate than you. Such as working at a needle exchange, soup kitchen or some other charitable project... might be tricky to find during the pandemic though

[Limahong]

10 hours ago, freeform said:

The most powerful advice (but one that is almost always not taken by anyone) is to find a way to volunteer your time to help others less fortunate than you.

 

 

That is when we can/will start to count our blessings?

 

 

 

 

 

Edited December 22, 2020 by Limahong
Enhancement

[sagebrush]

I  highly recommend Acupuncture as a modality to help treat anxiety.

 

I was contemplating as well observing last evening while having dinner with a four other friends last evening...

 

after dinner everyone began picking up their iphones and tend to them which I thought not only was RUDE

 

but really showing me and affirming to me how obsessed people are and addicted to technology. THis is also true with this forum.

 

Although I am not being critical of others regarding this forum I find it most restful to leave the forum for long periods of time to just get a break from it all.

 

Nature is truly healing and inspiring.

 

But of course everyone here already has perfect balance and equinimity.

 

Yeah....right

 

 

I was once offered some advice on panic attacks because as a IBD sufferer I often would be tuning into my stomach listening to any activity especially in public. Many times I would go through unbelievable waves of anxiety. "standing in the middle of it" and  letting it have you. not always easy but it was helpful to me.

thanks

 

Hope you get relief soon.

 

 

 

 

 

Edited December 22, 2020 by sagebrush

[Creation]

15 hours ago, freeform said:

find a way to volunteer your time to help others less fortunate than you. 

Does this include animals?

[freeform]

8 hours ago, Creation said:

Does this include animals?

yes

 

Though humans is better (and usually more challenging)

[dwai]

Sounds like you have what is called a “vata imbalance” in Ayurveda. The symptoms of vata (wind/air humor) imbalance is mental fog, confusion, anxiety, panic attacks, negative and often neurotic thoughts arising in the mind. It can lead to heart palpitations too. There can be pain in the joints and bones too, with sensations of cold/shivering and sharp pains. 

 

Try to eat items listed below and keep yourself warm, close your ears with small cotton balls, don’t expose yourself to windy/cold weather. 
 

https://www.banyanbotanicals.com/info/ayurvedic-living/living-ayurveda/diet/vata-pacifying-foods/

 

maintain a vata pacifying lifestyle —

https://www.banyanbotanicals.com/info/ayurvedic-living/learning-ayurveda/lifestyle-recommendations/vata-pacifying/

 

Edited December 23, 2020 by dwai

[Limahong]

17 hours ago, Creation said:

Does this include animals?

 

8 hours ago, freeform said:

yes

Though humans is better (and usually more challenging)

 

How about Nature in general ~ from an environmental perspective that will include humans, animals...?