Hi from Kate

[Birch]

Hi!

 

I'm really pleased to see a forum like this. Not sure what my contribution will be but I'm interested in reading what other people say.

 

I don't really know how to explain what brought me to it except a 'realization' over the past few days. I have had similar experiences in the past but not to this extent and not quite as persistent.

 

The realization (or whatever you want to call it) has brought me by turns both incredible peace and calm and happiness and a sense that anything is possible and some other more 'mystical weirdness' that I feel especially stupid writing about on a public forum given my own set of very concrete non-mystical beliefs;-)

 

I may write about that, but in the private forum...

 

On a less light-hearted note, I also feel somewhat shaken up, not least because I like my ego and was starting to like it even more since I've been making progress to 'improve' it. I've been reading about it's 'death' on here and I'd rather hang on to it.

 

There's also some anxiety there related to some kind dissonance of what all this is (or isn't) and I don't like that at all. Any advice on reducing anxiety in this context would be really appreciated.

 

I didn't intentionally go looking for any of these experiences, I was more interested in improving some personal skills and attitudes (ok 'fears' mostly - fear of public speaking, fear of failure, fear of commitment, fear of telling the man I think I love how I feel, fear of falling off my horse (again, ok, so now that's twice and there's really no point in being scared any more, it can only happen again ;-))

 

I'm pretty pragmatic and I thought that cognitive psychology would help with a lot of the stuff I was trying to fix. And it has/does but I wasn't prepared for this other stuff that comes with it.

 

I'd actually be really happy if someone just told me that this is nothing at all. I'm expecting a Tao/zen joke with 'nothing' in there somewhere;-)

 

Looking forward to reading you.

 

Kate

[Ian]

The realization (or whatever you want to call it) has brought me by turns both incredible peace and calm and happiness and a sense that anything is possible and some other more 'mystical weirdness' that I feel especially stupid writing about on a public forum given my own set of very concrete non-mystical beliefs;-)

 

I may write about that, but in the private forum...

 

On a less light-hearted note, I also feel somewhat shaken up, not least because I like my ego and was starting to like it even more since I've been making progress to 'improve' it. I've been reading about it's 'death' on here and I'd rather hang on to it.

 

There's also some anxiety there related to some kind dissonance of what all this is (or isn't) and I don't like that at all. Any advice on reducing anxiety in this context would be really appreciated.

Kate

 

Dear Kate,

First of all welcome. It's nice to have someone here who sounds sensible.

 

It sounds as if 1) you're having stuff happen without really trying, and are therefore, as they say, "ripe" and stuff will probably continue to unfold spontaneously and all you have to do is learn to enjoy it.

 

to which end, 2) anxiety is only natural because you're not a "seeker" and you haven't been reading and fussing and looking forward to what might happen, so it will be unfamiliar.

 

It may be useful, when anxious, to 1) breathe deeply to your belly and 2) to sink, to whatever extent possible, into feeling the background aliveness/tingliness of your body, thus not identifying fully with anxious thought or whatever physical flutters come with it.

 

The other thing I would suggest is to totally give up trying to define what "it" is and what is happening. Because firstly that's what your most egoic self does, and secondly it won't help as stuff will probably keep changing anyway.

 

Does that help? I hope so. But I'm no expert, so take me (and everyone!) with a pinch of salt unless it resonates with your own experience.

 

Best wishes,

Ian

[Yoda]

Looking forward to reading you.

 

 

Welcome to taobums!

[Birch]

 

Welcome to taobums!

 

 

Thank you Ian and Yoda!

 

@Ian, I appreciate you saying I sounded sensible. I'm not sure of that. I sometimes think I'm 'off it' when I get into talking about this stuff. Must be the upbringing ;-)

 

Many thanks also for suggestions on reducing anxiety. I've often found myself too inside my mind and not enough inside my body (maybe OT there, but maybe you get the gist as well).

 

 

@Yoda, love the name and thanks for the warm welcome!

 

It is possible that I will be both an unruly and incompetent contributor ;-)

 

I may also ask you really stupid questions.

 

Thanks!

[Yoda]

It is possible that I will be both an unruly and incompetent contributor ;-)

 

Kate,

 

It never stopped me, you'll fit right in!

 

Your pal,

Yoda

[Birch]

Kate,

 

It never stopped me, you'll fit right in!

 

Your pal,

Yoda

 

 

Thanks!

 

I have so many dumb questions to ask, it's insane!

 

The 1st idumb question is sparked by @Ian's comment about my 'non-seeker' approach (ok, not a word, but you get the idea).

 

- Why would anyone actually want to seek this stuff out?

- (variation) Why are people seeking?

[Birch]

Thanks!

 

I have so many dumb questions to ask, it's insane!

 

The 1st idumb question is sparked by @Ian's comment about my 'non-seeker' approach (ok, not a word, but you get the idea).

 

- Why would anyone actually want to seek this stuff out?

- (variation) Why are people seeking?

 

 

- OT, ANOTH-T. Last/latest and greatest n00b question Q: For the private practice forum, what is the best way to approach posting?

 

Thanks!

 

Kate

[Yoda]

You can post on anyone's thread in the private practice area. If you want your own private practice forum, you have to pm Sean Omlor.

 

Taobums is like Fantasy Island: we are all here for different reasons. But I'm Tattoo. That is the one certain thing around here.

[Birch]

You can post on anyone's thread in the private practice area. If you want your own private practice forum, you have to pm Sean Omlor.

 

Taobums is like Fantasy Island: we are all here for different reasons. But I'm Tattoo. That is the one certain thing around here.

 

 

Hi Yoda,

 

Thanks for that. Will ping Sean.

 

I'm glad there's a private area because I'm capable of writing so much (crap/weirdness) on a variety of topics that I'd prefer it not be public! Like:

 

'there are only ever 4 reasons for why my cat is pissed at me: food, water, litter-tray or love - I would say the same for myself'

 

or a really pretentious:

 

'how many of us cannot see the horizon because we are too busy looking down at the dirt on our shoes?'

 

It never felt like that last one came from me anyway ;-)

 

See what I mean ;-) ?

 

Kate

[Taiji Bum]

Hey Kate, welcome to da Bums.

[Birch]

Hey Kate, welcome to da Bums.

 

 

Hi Darren, thanks for the warm welcome!