Oh look, I got covid

[forestofclarity]

On 8/18/2021 at 12:52 AM, Earl Grey said:

you must accept there is a spiritual lesson involved with covid19, and it is only one of the many trials we are undergoing now as a collective species.

 

It is strange how those lessons can shift. Suffering is always a challenge. One of the reasons I got into Buddhism was that it was pretty up front with suffering--- it didn't try to explain it or sugar coat. It's right there, the very first Noble Truth--- the truth of suffering. It is so raw, so primal, so beyond comprehension. 

 

Initially, it was suffering that brought me to the path. Then, suffering was the motivation for practice. But currently, I have realized we are all suffering, just in different ways. And what really unites us is the wish to be free. And knowing these are universal experiences, this gives rise to universal compassion. It is really hard to hate anyone knowing that, like me, they suffer and wish to be free. And if they were really free from suffering, they would be so beautiful. 

 

May your suffering bear something useful for your path. 

[Miffymog]

7 hours ago, Earl Grey said:

 

Going to respond to both of these later when I’m a little more awake because I was seriously questioning my sanity last night and pondering if I was approaching Sylvia Plath levels of despondence (no joke).

 

"If you find yourself going through hell, all you can do is keep going."

Winston Churchill

 

Good luck Earl Grey, it'll get better in time.

 

[Earl Grey]

I haven't forgotten to reply to the above messages. I'm  trying to get some practices in to keep recovering. The recovery process is a bit of a challenge, so I'm going to reply later when I'm a bit better. 

 

On a positive note, the landlady left some food at my door and might have given a silent rebuke to the neighbor downstairs for her pettiness.

 

Would love if someone were to help take the garbage for us though, which would be nice since I've always offered to take their garbage for them to the heap down the street whenever I toss mine before I got sick--and I did it a lot for that passive-aggressive neighbor, which is what makes her behavior all the more puzzling. 

[Earl Grey]

I've decided that some things are best shared by PM...so I'll prepare those messages sometime this week to a few who commented here.

[Earl Grey]

An update here on the way the government is not really sure about what it's doing and the hostile neighbor downstairs.

 

The doctor who came to test for covid19, his assistant, the local government unit for my community, and the national government are all saying different things about whether I am able to leave today. 

 

I have a certificate saying that last Friday that I could leave because I had already had covid19 for two weeks, and the doctor said that the virus is dead, no need to worry about spreading it. The assistant is giving different dates because he says it should be this coming Friday, which determines I've been in quarantine from the date of testing rather than when symptoms actually started, and even if I had a home antigen test before I took the PCR test. The Department of Health is changing their criteria almost weekly it seems, and the LGU is now saying that we need a certificate of clearance, not just a certificate of completing my two-week quarantine.

 

My nosy neighbor found out that our other neighbors got covid19, and they were taken to a facility to be quarantined for two weeks today. She is blaming me for infecting them--even though I have never even seen these people or interacted with them in my life. She also wants my roommate and me to be picked up right away to be isolated, not giving a crap that nobody is going to be here to take care of the dogs and cats and demanding that nobody endangers her or her right to leave her door open and not wear a mask when she wanders around the common area outside. 

 

I'll have been stuck in my house for over three weeks by this Friday, and if the neighbor has her way, I won't leave until next week. 

[TranquilTurmoil]

Not sure if this is helpful/relevant  but doubt that it will hurt…

 

As someone who can relate to having suffered severe psychological anguish in isolation for extended periods of time, sometimes it’s more beneficial to surrender effortful practices that are aimed at fixing the temporarily Unfixable and turn the energy you have toward restorative practices, surrender, prayer (as you are doing appealing to the medicine Buddha). I’m not sure If that is already the approach you are taking or if you are trying to will your way to a sense of well being. Sometimes turning extreme adversity into an opportunity to cultivate forbearance is the best we can do.

 

I hope your despondence subsides, your ptsd heals in time, and that you get to reunite or stay United with your furry friends soon.

Edited August 25, 2021 by TranquilTurmoil

[Earl Grey]

36 minutes ago, TranquilTurmoil said:

I’m not sure If that is already the approach you are taking or if you are trying to will your way to a sense of well being. Sometimes turning extreme adversity into an opportunity to cultivate forbearance is the best we can do.

 

Force is never the way in anything I've learned. Try pushing a wall, and see how much pushback you get. 

 

It's a bit hard to push and will my way back to health even if I wanted to because I'm limited by my fatigue and brain fog. Today, for example, I did a warmup and could only do some slow movements for about 10 minutes before deciding I need to continue later as I am already tired and need to rest again. My warmup was about 20 minutes of stretching and Baduanjin, mind you. 

 

More rest is really what I'm going to be doing over the next six weeks, and breaking up my recovery macro into increments throughout the day when the body isn't begging to rest or avert my eyes from the computer screen. Even playing chess is at times a strain, but I still end up being stubborn when the creative mind is active rather than the quantitative mind, so sketching and creative writing is still something of an outlet for me. 

 

41 minutes ago, TranquilTurmoil said:

I hope your despondence subsides, your ptsd heals in time, and that you get to reunite or stay United with your furry friends soon.

 

Just to clarify, it's cPTSD. 

 

The good news is that the dogs and cats can touch me now, as they're sleeping in the bed with me most of the time. So even if the neighbor is basically treating me like I'm a plague rat of doom, I'm ignoring her while the dogs and cats all hog the bed and sandwich me between them. 

 

Thanks for the advice. 

[Earl Grey]

I am on the upwards part of recovery now. Mind recovering better thanks to support and good practice as detailed on my thread at AG.

 

As it’s been three weeks, today now marks the end of the first week of the recovery period and I have around five weeks to go before fully returning to my previous level of health.

 

The neighbors are still giving me dirty looks or ignoring me. I have ups and downs and am trying to focus on moving forward because I don’t have much time to rest due to my deadline to move out before the end of the year.

 

Wish me luck as I look for a way forward with my writing and teaching.

[Apech]

23 hours ago, Earl Grey said:

I am on the upwards part of recovery now. Mind recovering better thanks to support and good practice as detailed on my thread at AG.

 

As it’s been three weeks, today now marks the end of the first week of the recovery period and I have around five weeks to go before fully returning to my previous level of health.

 

The neighbors are still giving me dirty looks or ignoring me. I have ups and downs and am trying to focus on moving forward because I don’t have much time to rest due to my deadline to move out before the end of the year.

 

Wish me luck as I look for a way forward with my writing and teaching.

 

In terms of the neighbours - if you are so inclined - I would recommend making rice and /or incense offerings to them as per harmful spirits and make prayers for their benefit.  They are possessed by fears and distrust and have forgotten kindness - which is more sad for them than it is for you.

 

I pray your recovery is quicker than you might think.

 

Best wishes.

 

 

[zerostao]

Anyone scrolled down the articles on Bloomberg.com lately?

 

you might think you’d stumbled onto an alt right conspiracy site.

[Earl Grey]

19 minutes ago, Apech said:

 

In terms of the neighbours - if you are so inclined - I would recommend making rice and /or incense offerings to them as per harmful spirits and make prayers for their benefit.  They are possessed by fears and distrust and have forgotten kindness - which is more sad for them than it is for you.

 

I pray your recovery is quicker than you might think.

 

Best wishes.

 

 

 

Thanks for the advice. I usually include them in my Medicine Buddha practice with incense I've restarted recently when I rebuilt some energy, so good to see we're on the same page.

 

Today when I walked past them though, several slammed the door shut or turned away from me, but one neighbor was very happy to see me and was jovial because he was worried about me. 

 

There are all sorts of people in the world...and covid has shown us who we are in the dark. 

[Earl Grey]

18 minutes ago, zerostao said:

Anyone scrolled down the articles on Bloomberg.com lately?

 

you might think you’d stumbled onto an alt right conspiracy site.

 

After getting sick, I have to choose how I use my time wisely...and I think I'd rather avoid getting upset. 

[Taomeow]

2 hours ago, Apech said:

 

In terms of the neighbours - if you are so inclined - I would recommend making rice and /or incense offerings to them as per harmful spirits and make prayers for their benefit. 

 

At the height of the lockdown last year, I did think a neighbor of mine got possessed by a bona fide demon, or else flat out gone insane, which in many traditions is the same thing.  The demon was weird -- it had her talk to herself at the top of her voice outside my window, sing little children's songs (she was a kindergarten teacher and knew many), position herself across from my door and shriek in mock terror every time the door opened asserting I startled her -- or, alternatively, hide behind hers and jump out at me with a deafening "Hi!" startling me and then laughing like a lunatic, stuff like that.  She threw a birthday party when it was illegal in our parts, inviting everybody who believed in the cake more than in social distancing or masks, and chased me with a piece of that cake, which I imagined having been coughed and sneezed at by all the superspreaders -- I could practically see little spiky balls crawling all over it -- I had to slam my door in her face to avoid being forced to eat that cake.   In general, she insisted on doing me favors I didn't need -- offering things like planting pots or potted plants, or monstrously huge wind chimes she thought I would enjoy hanging over my door or "do whatever you want with it but make sure I don't hear it," and the like.  So, a demon with offerings, rather than in need of offerings.  What would you do about such entity?..

[thelerner]

I've been noticing and comparing notes lately w/ friends on the 'demon' of urinary track infections.  I'm in my late 50's, many friends are of similar age, w/ parents in their late 70s or 80s.  We all have stories of bizarre extreme behavior of our parents who were suffering urinary track infections.  Sometime paranoia, fear or off track thinking.  

 

I think what's worked best is to agree and postpone.  Like, yes there is a fire, but now it's out and we're safe.  Thank you for the..cake, I'll eat it later. 

 

In the short run, it's pointless to argue against an irrational mind**.  We can't win.  Rational argument will not make a dent, indeed it will inflame the situation.  So.. agree/lie, sooth, reframe the problem into the future. 

 

** in the long(er) run, maybe it is worthwhile, in an- each drip makes a tiny difference kind of way.  ie stating the truth, and the facts behind it, but that's assuming we'll be with the person in the long run.  on the third hand, sometimes having peace is better than being right or straightening out the other.     

[Apech]

3 hours ago, Taomeow said:

 

At the height of the lockdown last year, I did think a neighbor of mine got possessed by a bona fide demon, or else flat out gone insane, which in many traditions is the same thing.  The demon was weird -- it had her talk to herself at the top of her voice outside my window, sing little children's songs (she was a kindergarten teacher and knew many), position herself across from my door and shriek in mock terror every time the door opened asserting I startled her -- or, alternatively, hide behind hers and jump out at me with a deafening "Hi!" startling me and then laughing like a lunatic, stuff like that.  She threw a birthday party when it was illegal in our parts, inviting everybody who believed in the cake more than in social distancing or masks, and chased me with a piece of that cake, which I imagined having been coughed and sneezed at by all the superspreaders -- I could practically see little spiky balls crawling all over it -- I had to slam my door in her face to avoid being forced to eat that cake.   In general, she insisted on doing me favors I didn't need -- offering things like planting pots or potted plants, or monstrously huge wind chimes she thought I would enjoy hanging over my door or "do whatever you want with it but make sure I don't hear it," and the like.  So, a demon with offerings, rather than in need of offerings.  What would you do about such entity?..

 

I'm sure you know full well how to deal with her  but I would comment that neediness can express itself in a variety of ways - even the need to give is a form of want.

 

Personally I cultivate an air of polite distance tinged with sociopathy which comes naturally as I am English, if you know what I mean.

 

 

[Taomeow]

4 hours ago, Apech said:

 

I'm sure you know full well how to deal with her  but I would comment that neediness can express itself in a variety of ways - even the need to give is a form of want.

 

Personally I cultivate an air of polite distance tinged with sociopathy which comes naturally as I am English, if you know what I mean.

 

 

 

Luckily, she's back to her regular self since the lockdowns have been lifted.  All she needs in her regular state is a lot of yapping (she patrols the neighborhood for people to accost and engage in a conversation), and two hours daily of swimming in the swimming-pool -- at least on the surface of it, and I'm not qualified to address her deeper needs.  So, the demonic effects were all about being cut off from both opportunities.  

 

I know what you mean about being English.  My primal therapy guru Art Janov in LA used "your problem is, you're English" as one of his diagnostic verdicts for some of his patients (there was a good outcropping of your compatriots in that community).  They invariably came back with "your problem is, you're Jewish."  Which was one way to look away from their problem...  luckily, Art was many things but bashful wasn't one of them, so the disguise or blessing or blessing in disguise of being English would get addressed sooner or later.  

 

Apologies to the OP for the tangent.  

[Earl Grey]

1 hour ago, Taomeow said:

Apologies to the OP for the tangent.

Not a problem. Pleasant diversion and fun reading still.

[Apech]

15 hours ago, Taomeow said:

 

Luckily, she's back to her regular self since the lockdowns have been lifted.  All she needs in her regular state is a lot of yapping (she patrols the neighborhood for people to accost and engage in a conversation), and two hours daily of swimming in the swimming-pool -- at least on the surface of it, and I'm not qualified to address her deeper needs.  So, the demonic effects were all about being cut off from both opportunities.  

 

I know what you mean about being English.  My primal therapy guru Art Janov in LA used "your problem is, you're English" as one of his diagnostic verdicts for some of his patients (there was a good outcropping of your compatriots in that community).  They invariably came back with "your problem is, you're Jewish."  Which was one way to look away from their problem...  luckily, Art was many things but bashful wasn't one of them, so the disguise or blessing or blessing in disguise of being English would get addressed sooner or later.  

 

Apologies to the OP for the tangent.  

 

 

Bearing in mind that English and Jewish are not mutually exclusive categories.

 

 

[Earl Grey]

Just to report that I'm in the 40% range of recovery, could be 50% on good days, but I'm going slowly and conservatively until my program macro ends at the start of October.

 

Special thanks to the following people:

 

 @freeform for his advice regarding how Spontaneous Five Animals while sick with covid19 probably isn't a good idea and led me to conclude that it is probably best for preventing it or doing so when the virus is completely purged and recovery is finished,

 

@Cleansox for his information on physiological effects for those with trauma affected by covid19 and the most proper scientific order for basic recovery that is thankfully system-agnostic and good news for people who know how to stretch their bodies or move slowly--otherwise known as Baduanjin and basic stretches plus Tai Chi,

 

@Taomeow for her greatly detailed information on recovery and the effects of the virus on individuals beyond what is currently on official record and helping me remember that the information changes almost daily,

 

@小梦想 for his stillness meditation that has helped bring together everything I'm doing and greatly reduce my stress, thereby increasing my recovery, 

 

@Zhongyongdaoist for his constant support always and for being a great font of wisdom, 

 

@zen-bear for his Flying Phoenix system and constant checking in to make sure I'm recovering well, 

 

and everyone else here on this thread who has commented or sent private messages for their support. 

 

Many thanks and blessings to you all. 

[Earl Grey]

So I’m fully recovered and now want to share something about living with Covid-19.

 

My unpleasant neighbors who don’t mask, don’t vax, don’t distance, and don’t wear a face shield somehow still disdain me, but are also throwing parties every night. And yet, I’m the bad guy for getting Covid as they continue doing passive-aggressive things like locking me out or leaving notes about every little thing I do such as feeding stray cats OUTSIDE the property in front rather than inside.

 

I also found out a friend of mine died a couple weeks ago, someone who makes me immediately think of how the Covid-19 discussion led to more bad blood between people here than Trump could ever hope to accomplish. Our friendship was a bit strained because he was a pro-Duterte authoritarian and CCP propaganda shill, who then naturally evolved into a bully who ridiculed me for believing the vaccine con and was a proponent of ivermectin.

 

Our friendship the last few years was passive sniping in Telegram, on political issues we both disagree with and links that neither of us would read or respond to, and now, his widow responded to my last snipe today that he died after two months in the ICU on life support after his medically induced coma and blood drive due to preexisting conditions.

 

Can everyone just PLEASE GET ALONG? I am too exhausted to argue any point anymore no matter what anyone believes because all this polarization and bad blood means I never got to enjoy my last few years with a friend.

 

Granted, it was a tough position given that he was a bully and condescending, but what kind of choice is that? To put up with ideological abuse to maintain a friendship or cut ties because I can’t stand to have my own struggles disregarded by an old money lad? Someone who never rode public transport, never learned to wash his own clothes, and never had to decide if he would eat or his pets would eat?

 

That decision about what to do when you can’t see eye-to-eye and have a good faith disagreement anymore is something that needs to STOP everywhere in the world, but until people learn when they should remain silent and when people should speak up, I don’t want to imagine if things can get worse and want to hope that it will all get better.

 

Mic drop.

Edited November 18, 2021 by Earl Grey

[anshino23]

I am now also joining the COVID-19 club. I just had a PCR confirmation. I'm double vaccinated with the Pfizer vaccine yet still caught it. It may have been because I worked 4 days in a row in the COVID-department overseeing those patients last week. The incubation period for COVID is between 4 and 14 days which makes it almost impossible to tell when you got it. I remember the first sensation of symptoms when I was out having a drink with a friend last thursday but shrugged it off as being nothing but a sensation (felt like something between a wind-invasion and something lodging in my throat). Next day I felt fine.  

 

Only symptoms I have which happened on Sunday were a stuffy nose and loss of smell (which sucks, but hopefully will come back). 

 

I am on a strong antiviral cocktail with vitamin C, vitamin D, CoQ10 (two versions), multivitamin, l-carnitine, green tea, zinc, reduced glutathione, taurine and quercetine. Considering adding PDE-5 inhibitors and maybe metformin as well though my case is so mild it may be a bit of an overkill. 

 

Best wishes to everyone out there. 

Edited November 24, 2021 by anshino23

[anshino23]

Antiviral cocktail appears to work very well!

 

I added some serrapeptase as a mucolytic agent and also added a neurogenic compound to aid with brain recovery that upregulates BDNF... Have smell returning by a pretty big percentage in my right nostril already.

 

So far so good.  

 

Just adding this information here in case people get COVID themselves and may want to speed up recovery. Not a blinded study or anything, but may be useful anyway. Mechanistically the addition of the compounds I've mentioned thus far make a lot of sense. If people are interested I can describe why that is, too. 

[mitzy]

On 11/24/2021 at 3:06 PM, anshino23 said:

Antiviral cocktail appears to work very well!

 

I added some serrapeptase as a mucolytic agent and also added a neurogenic compound to aid with brain recovery that upregulates BDNF... Have smell returning by a pretty big percentage in my right nostril already.

 

So far so good.  

 

Just adding this information here in case people get COVID themselves and may want to speed up recovery. Not a blinded study or anything, but may be useful anyway. Mechanistically the addition of the compounds I've mentioned thus far make a lot of sense. If people are interested I can describe why that is, too. 

 

Could you please elaborate more. The cocktail you used worked very well -  it would be very useful for others to know what to do. COVID is such a  contagious disease. 

 

 

[anshino23]

13 hours ago, mitzy said:

Could you please elaborate more. The cocktail you used worked very well -  it would be very useful for others to know what to do. COVID is such a  contagious disease. 

 

Sure thing. Smell is all back to normal now. 

 

Still have some heat toxin effects from the COVID, but besides that it's clearing out nicely. My recommended protocol, with just short descriptions of their effects and why I included them:  

1. 1-3g Taurine. Taurine is a natural amino acid and has many positive actions; it reduces reactive oxygen species, maintains osmotic balance, also has calmin effects through NMDA and glycine receptor effects.  
2. Vitamin D 3000-5000IU daily. Ideally you want your levels being around 40-50 ng/ml as too high levels can lead to hypercalcemia (high levels of calcium) which can lead to increased levels of calcification of one's arteries and also lead to depressant effects (muscular tone and mood). 
3. Vitamin C 1-3g. Essentially it's helpful for the immune system. 
4. Zinc 10-50mg. Antiviral effects. Positive effects on hormonal signalling. Immune system effects.  
5. CoQ10. Reduction of reactive oxygen species and important for the production of energy (ATP celullarly). 
6. Multivitamin. Just to make sure all bases are covered. 
7. L-carnitine. Enhanced mitochondrial efficiency through beta-oxidation of fatty acids.  
8. Green tea. Modulates immune system, blunts overactivation and cytokine storms. 
9. Reduced glutathione. Increases glutathione intracellularly. Glutathione is an extremely powerful antioxidant and also supports the immune system. 
10. Quercetin. Has anti-inflammatory, antioxidant and analgesic effects. 
11. Serrapeptase. Anti-inflammatory, fibrinolytic and mucolytic and thus aiding recovery. 
12. 7,8-dihydroxyflavone. Naturally occuring flavone found in some plants. The important part here is that it binds to the TrKB receptor which is the main signalling receptor of BDNF, or brain-derived neurotrophic factor. Thus it helps aid recovery and protects the brain from insult. 

I hope this was of help to you... Best of luck.  

 

 

 

[mitzy]

Glad you feel better. The fact that smell recovered so fast shows the power of your immune system / recovery in general . 

Thank you for sharing. Your cocktail has already been tested and it worked- part of the reason you recovered so fast.

 

Talking about working with COVID patients, what do you think about naso-oropharyngeal sanitization with povidine-iodine

nasal spray ? As prophylaxis-  something like use it during the shift or just after the shift .