kino Posted November 1, 2023 Hello all, I've been masturbating since I was 13, I'm now 28. Before I would masturbate about 3-4 times a day when I was about 16 but after my girlfriend left me when I was 20 this habit got destructive. I masturbated out of sheer frustration, thinking about her having sex with another man. This led me down I dark path where I was actively trying to destroy my genitals and myself; I masturbated about 8-10 times per day during that time. I would masturbate until my penis hurt and nothing came out. I've been trying to kick the habit for sometime now but It's proving difficult. When I was 24 i started having complications with what started with the head of my penis (itching/burning) which progressed to the urethra and has now found its way to my scrotum. I'm starting to feel the effects of masturbating on my whole body now when I participate in the behaviour and I noticed that my body does not simply spring back to vitality anymore. Now when I masturbate it hurts my lower back and belly bottom during ejaculation. I regret my decisions so much that i'm filled with dread. Became curious in neidan about a year ago and I've realized that I was destroying one of my 3 treasures all this time (jing). Is it possible to replenish it? is it possible to heal? Sometimes I feel like I've fucked this life up and the only way forward is a restart of some sort. Any advice. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Maddie Posted November 1, 2023 I think it's important to realize that semen is not Jing. Jing is lost through desire not through ejaculation. 5 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
kino Posted November 1, 2023 Thats good news I guess... So the desire for sex depletes jing then right? Thanks for sharing with me Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ChiDragon Posted November 1, 2023 2 hours ago, kino said: Now when I masturbate it hurts my lower back and belly bottom during ejaculation. I regret my decisions so much that i'm filled with dread. I'[m sorry to hear that. There is a solution to stop the pain. I had posted the solution somewhere on this site. Perhaps you might able to fine it. I have to cook dinner now. I will get back with you later. Thanks! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
kino Posted November 2, 2023 @ChiDragon Thank you for replying. I'll be sure to check through your posts. Could you give me a hint of what you were speaking about so i could find it easier? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ChiDragon Posted November 2, 2023 1 hour ago, kino said: @ChiDragon Thank you for replying. I'll be sure to check through your posts. Could you give me a hint of what you were speaking about so i could find it easier? It is somthing that is related to excessive masturbation. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ChiDragon Posted November 2, 2023 (edited) 1 hour ago, kino said: @ChiDragon Thank you for replying. I'll be sure to check through your posts. Could you give me a hint of what you were speaking about so i could find it easier? Procedure to get rid of the abdominal pain due to over masturbation. Place your index and middle fingers along one to two inches below you belly button or one finger on the belly button. Press down within one to two inches until you feel a pulsating pain, then continue to press down with a little pressure. If you can withstand the pulsating pain just continue to hold the fingers down. Otherwise, you can release your fingers then press down again until your abdominal pain is gone. @kino This procedure will work for pains related to over masturbation. To answer your OP, you may perform meditation with deep and long breathing. There is a post that I had posted for the Ultimate method of breathing (UMB). Again, I need to find it for you. Edited November 2, 2023 by ChiDragon Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Cobie Posted November 2, 2023 (edited) There’s also this thread: Edited November 2, 2023 by Cobie Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Cobie Posted November 2, 2023 (edited) 8 hours ago, ChiDragon said: … There is a post that I had posted for the Ultimate method of breathing (UMB). Again, I need to find it for you. It might be this post: Edited November 2, 2023 by Cobie Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Cobie Posted November 2, 2023 (edited) . Edited July 19 by Cobie Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Cobie Posted November 2, 2023 (edited) @ChiDragon should it not say if it’s “in” or “out” where I put […] in the following quote? On 26/02/2020 at 10:59 PM, ReturnDragon said: 吐(tu) is to breathe […] with the abdomen fully contracted inward. 吶(na) is to breathe […] with the abdomen fully expanded outward. Edited November 2, 2023 by Cobie Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ChiDragon Posted November 2, 2023 16 minutes ago, Cobie said: @ChiDragon should it not say if it’s “in” or “out” where I put […] in the following quote? 吐 is exhale 納 is inhale. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Nahfets Posted November 2, 2023 (edited) A good idea would be to use these supplements (tongkat ali, rhodiola, ginseng, safed musli and shilajit) alongside a regimen with daily Medical Qigong, some kind of exercise or cardio as well as some meditation techniques like microcosmic orbit, testicle breathing with eye rolling and purifying the qi with the heart energy with it transverses over the heart area back and front. Also do stillness meditation where you sit still and observe the breath or rest with focus in the dantien etc. Eating more fresh vegetables, smoothies and juices will also quickly enhance your vitality and staying clear from alcohol and cannabis will reduce your relapses not to mention lowering your sugar intake can be crucial to curve the impulsemanagement, so you'll be able to resist the urges. Getting the mind back to a loving vibation can also be very important so remind yourself with gratitude exercises preferably daily too. In general masturbation can be seen as an addiction that can stem from hereditary trauma where certain parts of the energetic and emotional system has been blocked and surpressed leading to a disconnect from the body. A good way to reverse this would be to massage your feet daily as well as practice horse stands where you lock your thighs and buttocks and build weiqi etc. Sometimes it is also from aquired or inherited succubi spirits that can torment the person whenever they try to break the habit. In this case buy yourself some crystals like clear quartz, black tourmaline, obsidian and jade and infuse them with your intent and emotion and preferably wear the necklace to sleep and around. Pray before bed each Night too. Also burn incense like sandalwood and white sage and visualize white energy protection around yourself and your home. Artemisia Vulgaris often grows abundantly too and can be a great incense replacement if you wan't to go out and pick some yourself. Also spend more time in nature, listen to the birds, talk to the trees, ask the spirits to heal you and walk barefoot to absorbe Earth qi and do some sungazing too would be recommended. I know this sounds like a lot and seems difficult to apply but start with the supplements and a few of the recommendations then the energy to get the rest moving will come shortly. I've been there myself and it is hard and I still stuggle with remnants of sexual energy spilled but I can promise you these things will help you and get you back into shape to be able to make progress and get healed again. Keep us updated on your journey in here and you can PM me anytime if you need help with getting going too. You can do this! Edited November 2, 2023 by Nahfets 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
kino Posted November 2, 2023 @Nahfets Thank you so much for your detailed response. I woke up this morning in one of the worst states I've ever been in. Thought I was coming out of the depression but it seems I thought wrong. This sense of hopelessness washed over me that when I sat to meditate I had to stop because of the dread I was feeling. This whole life felt like I've just been trying to heal since the onset of my depression at 14-15. I worry I may never heal and just end up suffering all the way through. I'm still here cause my mom is still alive and I dont want to hurt her, so I continue to suffer for her. I cant connect with anyone and life feels like one big prison. How can I forgive my past hurts, how can I let go of the pain. I keep lugging it around with me like i'm addicted to the suffering. It's all getting too much to hold onto now. I want to let it go but I just dont know how to. Meditation helps to bring me to the immediate now, but it does not help to reframe the way I see the world. I would like to see the world differently but I dont know how. Is there a practice of something I can do to fix this? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Maddie Posted November 2, 2023 (edited) 19 hours ago, kino said: Thats good news I guess... So the desire for sex depletes jing then right? Thanks for sharing with me correct also I don't think masturbation is the problem, I think your guilt about it is. Edited November 2, 2023 by Maddie Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Daniel Posted November 2, 2023 3 hours ago, kino said: Is there a practice of something I can do to fix this? Based on what you've written specifically the magnitude of the symptoms and the compulsion, getting some professional help I think would be a good idea. A licensed therapist, psychologist, or psychiatrist. This is not me judging you in any negative way. 3 hours ago, kino said: I'm still here cause my mom is still alive and I dont want to hurt her, so I continue to suffer for her. I cant connect with anyone and life feels like one big prison. What you have written above is cause for concern. These are symptoms of an illness which can be treated. 3 hours ago, kino said: This whole life felt like I've just been trying to heal since the onset of my depression at 14-15. That's a really long time. You're 28 now. This has been going on for half of your life. You have my sincerest sympathies, but I honestly think this is more than can be addressed on an internet forum. 3 hours ago, kino said: Meditation helps to bring me to the immediate now, but it does not help to reframe the way I see the world. I would like to see the world differently but I dont know how. A good therapist can help with this. That is their speciality. It's what they do. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Nahfets Posted November 2, 2023 14 minutes ago, Maddie said: correct also I don't think masturbation is the problem, I think your guilt about it is. Nonsense, masturbation depletes vital energy and attracks energy vampires that further will drag you down. Don't listen to women on this trust me. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Maddie Posted November 2, 2023 (edited) 18 minutes ago, Nahfets said: Nonsense, masturbation depletes vital energy and attracks energy vampires that further will drag you down. Don't listen to women on this trust me. first of all misogynistic much? also what if that woman is a licensed acupuncturist? what are your credentials beyond "trust me bro" ? anyways I never said that masturbation won't deplete energy. What I did say was that semen is not jing, and what actually depletes jing is desire not fluid loss. It's important to pay attention to detail before spouting off. Edited November 2, 2023 by Maddie 1 2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Nahfets Posted November 2, 2023 (edited) 4 hours ago, kino said: @Nahfets Thank you so much for your detailed response. I woke up this morning in one of the worst states I've ever been in. Thought I was coming out of the depression but it seems I thought wrong. This sense of hopelessness washed over me that when I sat to meditate I had to stop because of the dread I was feeling. This whole life felt like I've just been trying to heal since the onset of my depression at 14-15. I worry I may never heal and just end up suffering all the way through. I'm still here cause my mom is still alive and I dont want to hurt her, so I continue to suffer for her. I cant connect with anyone and life feels like one big prison. How can I forgive my past hurts, how can I let go of the pain. I keep lugging it around with me like i'm addicted to the suffering. It's all getting too much to hold onto now. I want to let it go but I just dont know how to. Meditation helps to bring me to the immediate now, but it does not help to reframe the way I see the world. I would like to see the world differently but I dont know how. Is there a practice of something I can do to fix this? One thing is that this addiction have depleted your kidney qi which opens you up to these emotions of dread, another thing is like Maddie mentions but in another way it might have to do with relationship with your mother or some of the dynamics and inherited patterns of emotions and behavior that might have been plaguing you for generations. When your weiqi becomes comprimized it can lead to all sorts of negative impacts but imagine your energetic field as a white dense layer a few inches outside your body originating from your lower dantien. Then a second layer of blue vibrant energy a feet or so outside your body originating from your kidneys. Lastly a red etheric layer that spans several feet outside of your body originating from your heart. Try to meditate on building these layers and expanding them too for protection and it will benefit greatly with breathwork, breath of fire, zhan zhuang and a clean diet. You can visualize blue light coming into your feet and going to your kidneys too this will help. Also rub your kidneys on the back with your hands. This meditation called Wu Zang from a book about Medical Qigong by Jerry Alan Johnson can also be benefitial. Imagine opening up the Baihui point (at the top of the head) and begin to pull in the Qi from the Heavens. Imagine the divine light as a brightshin ing white light, illuminating and filling your en tire body through the Baihui. Feel the body radi ating this divine white light energy. Next, imag ine this white light energy coalescing into the body's center core, forming an energetic tube of Heavenly energy that extends from the Baihui point to the Huiyin point. The center core vibrates and resonates with the divine white light energy. 1. Now, imagine a golden yellow mist of Qi aris ing from under the Earth and filling your body and connecting with the Spleen organ. Next, feel this golden light Earth energy en velop the center core of divine white light en ergy, merging together and synergizing. This represents the energy of your Yi (Intention), to root and stabilize your power. 2. Begin to focus on your Heart and imagine a portal opening and the Qi flowing out of your Heart like a red swirling wind in front of you, full of power, protecting you with your Shen and the fire of a red phoenix. This represents your innate spirit, alive, graceful yet powerful. 3. Focus your attention on your back and the Kidneys and Mingmen area. Imagine a por tal opening and the Qi flowing out of your Mingmen behind you like water. Out of this water grows an enormous dark blue turtle, The Wu Zang Meditation whose shell protects you like a mighty shield. This represents the energy of your Zhi (Will power), and the Jing and Zhi of all your an cestors, backing you and supporting you. 4. Place your attention on your Lungs and visu alize a portal opening on your right side of your body, under the right ribs. Imagine the Lung Qi flowing out of to the right side of your body like steam, forming a white tiger, as strong as steel. This represents the Po and the body's animal nature, that guards and pro tects you with an animal passion for survival. 532 5. Next, place your attention on your Liver and visualize a portal opening on your left side of your body, under the left ribs. Imagine the Liver Qi flowing out of to the left side of your body like steam, forming a green dragon, sin ewy and resilient as bamboo. This represents the Hun and the body's divine nature, guard ing and protecting you with a spiritual pas sion for victory. 6. Each animal begins to rotate to the left, pro tecting, stalking, and defending the previous animal's position to circle these energies, then increase their speed (like a mighty wind) counterclockwise around your body, blending these colors to gether, to form an energy bubble. After forming a protective rainbow hue around your body, draw the energies back in through the Baihui point and return the en ergy of each organ color back to its origin (the color red returns back to the Heart, dark blue to the Kidneys, white to the Lungs, and green back to the Liver). As the colors return back to their organ of origin, imagine steam (white light) flowing out of the pores and filling up the energy bubble created by the animal rota tion. This forms a solid connection between the body's internal organs and the body's ex ternal field of energy. 7. When the protection of the body with the Five Elementsis done, imagine that there are many sparkling lights like the Big Dipper above your head. Then you can enter the room of the patient, safe and protected. Keep in mind that you can send the five or gan energy outside of your body instantly, any time you need protection. Some schools teach the doctor to extend his or her energy like mist out through the eyes, enveloping the body with the five organ colors (green, red, yellow, white, and dark blue / indigo). Edit: This video is very good also for getting back into shape: Edited November 2, 2023 by Nahfets Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ChiDragon Posted November 2, 2023 (edited) 22 hours ago, kino said: I've been masturbating since I was 13, I'm now 28. Before I would masturbate about 3-4 times a day when I was about 16 but after my girlfriend left me when I was 20 this habit got destructive. I masturbated out of sheer frustration, thinking about her having sex with another man. This led me down I dark path where I was actively trying to destroy my genitals and myself; I masturbated about 8-10 times per day during that time. I would masturbate until my penis hurt and nothing came out. It seems you had done masturbation excessively. It affects your health tremendously. The worse thing that could be affected you is your mental health. Apperently, that is what is happening to you. It is because you had lost interest in everything. Are you still masturbating? You should stop doing it. May I ask does it affect your breathing? How deep can you breathe? The reason I ask is to determine if your body is lack of oxygen or hypoxia. Hypoxia is a state in which oxygen is not available in sufficient amounts at the tissue level to maintain adequate homeostasis; this can result from inadequate oxygen delivery to the tissues either due to low blood supply or low oxygen content in the blood (hypoxemia). Ref: https://www.google.com/search?client=firefox-b-1-d&q=hypoxia Edited November 2, 2023 by ChiDragon Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Daniel Posted November 2, 2023 (edited) 1 hour ago, Nahfets said: Nonsense, masturbation depletes vital energy and attracks energy vampires that further will drag you down. Don't listen to women on this trust me. wow.... your advice is "believe in invisible energy vampires and don't listen to women" You sir, should not be giving advice. Edited November 2, 2023 by Daniel 1 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ChiDragon Posted November 2, 2023 (edited) 8 hours ago, kino said: I woke up this morning in one of the worst states I've ever been in. Thought I was coming out of the depression but it seems I thought wrong. This sense of hopelessness washed over me that when I sat to meditate I had to stop because of the dread I was feeling. This whole life felt like I've just been trying to heal since the onset of my depression at 14-15. I worry I may never heal and just end up suffering all the way through. I'm still here cause my mom is still alive and I dont want to hurt her, so I continue to suffer for her. I cant connect with anyone and life feels like one big prison. How can I forgive my past hurts, how can I let go of the pain. I keep lugging it around with me like i'm addicted to the suffering. It's all getting too much to hold onto now. I want to let it go but I just dont know how to. Meditation helps to bring me to the immediate now, but it does not help to reframe the way I see the world. I would like to see the world differently but I dont know how. Is there a practice of something I can do to fix this? To be honest with you. I had the same problem as you have since I was eleven. I was determined to correct my health problem. My health problem was mainly affected by hypoxia. I have practiced Taiji for more than forty years. It have helped me to correct my health and mental problem tremendously. Right now, my body is like a 25 year old man at the age of 75. Mentally, I am able to cope with the things of interest enthusiastically. PS Taiji is considered to be a form of Qigong. Please note that breathing must be considered in any form of Qigong to be effective. Otherwise, it would be waste of time in the practice. Edited November 2, 2023 by ChiDragon to correct spellings Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
kino Posted November 2, 2023 1 hour ago, Daniel said: 2 hours ago, Daniel said: Based on what you've written specifically the magnitude of the symptoms and the compulsion, getting some professional help I think would be a good idea. A licensed therapist, psychologist, or psychiatrist. This is not me judging you in any negative way. I tried all 3 more than times than I'd like to admit. The psychiatrist diagnosed me as clinically depressed at 24, and gave me meds. I dont like the way SSRI's make me feel or think after awhile taking them so I stopped. He told me I was his most complicated patient to date and he was suppose to be one of the best in the island. All they do is talk and try to get you to figure your own shit out. I've done so much meta cognition and talking to myself that I know all the narratives they can spin. I thought about trying one more time recently but then thought "whats the point". Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
kino Posted November 2, 2023 1 hour ago, Nahfets said: When your weiqi becomes comprimized it can lead to all sorts of negative impacts but imagine your energetic field as a white dense layer a few inches outside your body originating from your lower dantien. Then a second layer of blue vibrant energy a feet or so outside your body originating from your kidneys. Lastly a red etheric layer that spans several feet outside of your body originating from your heart. My heart felt dammed up for the longest while, I was suppressing alot it seems. I cried hard this morning, I had been holding it in for awhile now cause I've learnt over the years that tears does nothing to remedy the situation. I was wrong, crying relieves a sort of pressure that weights down the heart. After crying and typing that message earlier, I feel the urge to meditate. This time I sat through my 20mins session like always but for a brief moment, I felt clarity and heard a still small voice telling me not to fear, that all is as it should be. It lasted maybe like 2 seconds in reality but those 2 seconds felt like a mini eternity. I rarely get so relax and serene when I meditate, guess the cry helped me. I also realized that everything I place out in the universe through my thoughts were causing pain to both myself and others. I will be more mindful of what I think and say. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
salaam123 Posted November 2, 2023 (edited) I have a masturbation addiction too. I have depleted my jing to the point that I feel exhausted the next day after masturbating. I think my urge happens, when I have generated enough jing and it can't go anywhere, so the body wants a release. I think the solution is to learn to convert the excess jing to chi. this may or may not work for you or me. Edited November 2, 2023 by salaam123 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites