sunshine Posted May 28, 2008 Good day all... in the clinic I am working at there is a "patient" who all her life has defined herself by/through others... sure enough a quite common phenomenon... one is a wife, a friend, fulfulls ones role as a child... etc. etc. etc. Currently all of that is breaking away and she does not know who she is. Her therapist now gave her the task to find out who she is... I wonder if you have striking poems or verses at hands that might help her to find out and start feeling comfortable in herself... thankx in advance for any help in this Harry Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Anette L Posted May 28, 2008 On Self-Knowledge - by Kahlil Gibran (from "the prophet") Your hearts know in silence the secrets of the days and the nights. But your ears thirst for the sound of your heart's knowledge. You would know in words that which you have always known in thought. You would touch with your fingers the naked body of your dreams. And it is well you should. The hidden well-spring of your soul must needs rise and run murmuring to the sea; And the treasure of your infinite depths would be revealed to your eyes. But let there be no scales to weigh your unknown treasure; And seek not the depths of your knowledge with staff or sounding line. For self is a sea boundless and measureless. Say not, "I have found the truth," but rather, "I have found a truth." Say not, "I have found the path of the soul." Say rather, "I have met the soul walking upon my path." For the soul walks upon all paths. The soul walks not upon a line, neither does it grow like a reed. The soul unfolds itself like a lotus of countless petals. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
mantis Posted May 28, 2008 a better exercise would be for her to write down everything she thinks she is Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Anette L Posted May 28, 2008 That`s a good idea mantis Just tell her that she is perfect the way she is, and make sure she knows we all get lost and wonder who we are And once we think we know, then all of a suddon we have changed. We are never really the same... Actually, she shouldn`t really listen to what any of us are saying or suggesting, she`s got all the answers she needs herself. But, one of my first thoughts when you mention poems and verses, is that she could go into a bookstore and just use her intuition to find a book that might give her a start, and maybe some answers. It`s funny how, when you need answers and have faith that they will be provided, they will come to you without you having to look for them. I don`t know how spiritual/alternative she is, `cause it might not be appropriate at all to suggest something like that. But, I do believe miracles occur and questions will be answered just with a little faith. We should never underestimate our intuition and ability to find all we need within ourselves. Then again, maybe it`s questions that are important, and not the answers.... ? I wish her all the best in her quest and hope she finds all the answers she needs Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
sunshine Posted May 29, 2008 Thankx much. Unfortunately the suggested is all not appropriate right here, right now, for the soul we talk about... would be too complicated to explain. Maybe some of us here who know that state of not knowing who we are, after understanding that we were so far in our life just through/by the roles we played... might share how they got out of it? would be cool Harry Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Heidi1975 Posted May 29, 2008 (edited) Is she supposed to figure that out till next appointment? I think that question takes a whole process to be answered, maybe weeks, months, years. It's about recognizing the path you've chosen, you may regret some of it, but you must accept it as a part of a bigger picture, that there is more to come. Nothing is ever wrong, just different so to speak. She is actually blessed to be facing this "crisis". Some people never even get their chance to question their life and identity. This brings growth and new understanding, but it will take as much time that it needs to reconnect with the true self. Here's one of my favorites. I'm not sure it's much help , but it's a beautiful poem by Robert Frost. It might be a comfort knowing that we always have a choice in how we perspect life. Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,And sorry I could not travel both And be one traveler, long I stood And looked down one as far as I could To where it bent in the undergrowth. Then took the other, as just as fair, And having perhaps the better claim, Because it was grassy and wanted wear; Though as for that the passing there Had worn them really about the same. And both that morning equally lay In leaves no step had trodden black. Oh, I kept the first for another day! Yet knowing how way leads on to way, I doubted if I should ever come back. I shall be telling this with a sigh Somewhere ages and ages hence: Two roads diverged in a wood, and I-- I took the one less traveled by, And that has made all the difference.~Robert Frost Edited May 29, 2008 by Heidi1975 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
hagar Posted May 29, 2008 This might sound like wisdom, but it's not: The sage is often envied because others do not know that although he is nourished by the Tao, like them, he too is mortal. He who seeks wisdom is well advised to give up academic ways, and put an end to striving. Then he will learn that yes and no are distinguished only by distinction. It is to the advantage of the sage that he does not fear what others fear, but it is to the advantage of others that they can enjoy the feast, or go walking, free of hindrance, through the terraced park in spring. The sage drifts like a cloud, having no specific place. Like a newborn babe before it smiles, he does not seek to communicate. In the eyes of those who have more than they need, the sage has nothing, and is a fool, prizing only that which of the Tao is born. The sage may seem to be perplexed, being neither bright nor clear, and to himself, sometimes he seems both dull and weak, confused and shy. Like the ocean at night, he is serene and quiet, but as penetrating as the winter wind. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Uncle Fester Posted May 29, 2008 (edited) . Edited September 19, 2021 by darebak Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
.broken. Posted May 29, 2008 Good day all... in the clinic I am working at there is a "patient" who all her life has defined herself by/through others... sure enough a quite common phenomenon... one is a wife, a friend, fulfulls ones role as a child... etc. etc. etc. Currently all of that is breaking away and she does not know who she is. Her therapist now gave her the task to find out who she is... I wonder if you have striking poems or verses at hands that might help her to find out and start feeling comfortable in herself... thankx in advance for any help in this Harry Alas, I do not have my books with me to share some words on inspiration. 'Who am I?' is probably the most profound of all questions. All people are a mixture of who they think other people think they are, and who they wish to become. It's quite rare to come across such an extreme case of exterior self definition. Unfortunately, I have come across many in my life. As such, she may find more balance by finding out who she wishes to become. To know that she is of her own making will be an important lesson for her to learn. Hehe, as the main character in Never Back Down found out, "it's all on me." Yours humbly, James Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
zanshin Posted May 29, 2008 (edited) .. Edited April 19, 2020 by zanshin Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
gendao Posted May 29, 2008 Godseed A fibrillation Of the cosmic essence The flower who forgot It was part of the tree The raindrop between Heaven and Earth All rivers returning To the sea. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
sean Posted May 29, 2008 I would suggest that she simply accept and cherish the "I don't know" just exactly the way it is. With all of the fear and confusion that might swarm around it, just accepting it all. "I don't know" is ok. And it's possible to relate to the world as "I don't know" after the ego crisis reaction. In a sense it's what is already happening anyway, beneath the surface of identity. Who is more lost, the person that is currently stunned and confused by reality, or the person that believes in illusions so thick they obscure the truth? Sean Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Taomeow Posted May 29, 2008 An empty shell will resonate with every wind and sing the song the wind has chosen to dictate: it will tune in and sing along... An empty shell... She may be stunned by silence if the wind should die, or panic when the setting sun spills all his blood across the sky-- But songs and fears will subside... A shell contains no wind, no sun unless a pearl should grow inside and say, Protect me, we are one. My only castle by the sea, my only shelter from the storm! I long to be, I'm meant to be -- Don't crack, don't crush me or deform -- and keep me warm... ©1996 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Wayfarer64 Posted May 29, 2008 here's a poem I wrote back in 1970 when I was 16...it was who I was then... IN A MOMENT (1970) In a moment the heart can feel the eternity of life. The first light sparkle of sun just edging into day. The message of a silent pleasure felt in a touch, maybe someone you like. Or that sigh of motion flopping into a cool bed after a full day of being... In that instant of the ball drifting through the hoop, hitting that special note on your mouth harp... Or gazing into a starlit night as a skyrocket culminates in geysers of fire... Even when you finally accept that tearing realization: she doesn't love you...and... In that moment, when,all you've said, done, felt all flows together into a life, you die. I had been exposed to a love that hurt...& of course I didn't die -but it felt like I had just died! I trust the being here now aspect may be of some use- I hope so and shall say a prayer to that end... Peace -Pat Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
nightwatchdog Posted May 30, 2008 She will eventually have her answer, because she has awoken enough to ask. She will not find her answer by thinking. Only by being. To quicken the process, I suggest "The Power of Now" by Eckhart Tolle "The Book: on the Taboo Against Knowing Who you Are." by Allan Watts Followed by an ongoing Zen, Dzogchen, or Vipassana class. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
thelerner Posted May 30, 2008 When deep in the midst of philosophical angst, its good to take a break every now and then. See a humorous movie. I recommend Jackie Chans "Who am I", humorous and action packed. Sometimes you have lay back and let the truth find you, instead of hunting for it. Michael Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
jan1107 Posted May 30, 2008 some funny little stories, i dont know if you like them or if they fit the situation, so decide yourselve: a spiritual teacher is walking on the street with one of his students. they pass by a man that sits on a bank. the teacher stumbles upon a stone that he didnt see and almost falls. the students thinks: how can it be that my master stumbles upon a stone. i thought he was perfect and always aware of everything around. i am loosing some of my faith in him. the teacher thinks: how embarassing. i am telling my students always to be present and now i stumble in front of one of them. i hope he doesnt tell the others ... the man on the bank thinks: a man stumbled. another story (sorry for the bad translation): a poor man lives at the edge of a village. he has a beautiful white male horse that everyone admires. people think he is crazy because he is so poor but doesnt sell his horse. but he truely loves it and every day he is happy caring for it. one day the horse runs away. the people of the village come and say to him: that was wrong. you should have sold your horse as we always told you, now it is gone and you have nothing! the man answers: everything is the way it is a week later the horse comes back with a beautiful white female horse. the people of the village came and said to him: you were right! now you even have two horses and you are even richer! the man answers: everything is the way it is. so his son tries to tame the new horse but falls and breaks bothe leggs. he will not be able to walk for a long, long time and cannot help his father. the people say: you were wrong. you should have sold them and this would not have happened. the man answers: everything is the way it is. a few weeks later there is a war near the village and the landlord takes all young man of the village to fight. many of them die. they didnt recrute the son of the poor man because he couldnt walk. the people say: you were right! AND SO ON AND SO ON .... actually a good idea, i will open a story-thread!!! love jan. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
seadog Posted May 30, 2008 The spirits journey can often be mapped on the body.This journey can be aided by the movement of blockages in the system. If we look at the names of the of the final six acupuncture points along the kidney meridian before it connects with the pericardium, we follow the spirits journey through the darkness of the unknown k22 walking unto the veranda,k23 spirit seal,kd24spirit burial ground,kd25 sprirt store house kd26 comfortable chest.This journey is a representation of the element of winter, the slumber of death before being reborn into the light of the "heavenly pool"percardium1.Which is are true nature. Often when these enegetic blocks are freed questions such as who am I are resolved,as the true nature of the individual is allowed to come forth. But as the journey of the spirit through the kidney meridian suggests we have to be willing to step out onto the veranda out side of what is safe or familiar, and in doing so much of what we use to beleive and cherish will die and be burried. I believe this a common occurence with many middle aged men and women especially after divorce or when the children leave home. By supporting the kidney energy this transition period can be handled in much more healthy and wholelistic manner. A skilled five element acupuncturist can be very helpful in such transitions. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
sheng zhen Posted May 30, 2008 The spirits journey can often be mapped on the body.This journey can be aided by the movement of blockages in the system. If we look at the names of the of the final six acupuncture points along the kidney meridian before it connects with the pericardium, we follow the spirits journey through the darkness of the unknown k22 walking unto the veranda,k23 spirit seal,kd24spirit burial ground,kd25 sprirt store house kd26 comfortable chest.This journey is a representation of the element of winter, the slumber of death before being reborn into the light of the "heavenly pool"percardium1.Which is are true nature. thats really interesting! I cant imagine you learn these things in a regular acupuncture school, do you? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
seadog Posted May 31, 2008 thats really interesting! I cant imagine you learn these things in a regular acupuncture school, do you? I'am not sure what you mean by a regular acupuncture school?There are many different schools of acupuncture each of which has its strenghts and weakness. The five element school of acupuncture believes that each of us is an expression of the Dao.The lack of true expression as it pertains to the five elements is the cause of much disease. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
sunshine Posted May 31, 2008 THANK YOU GIRLS & GUYS I am bowing to the divine in all of you & hers for sure too with smiles Harry Share this post Link to post Share on other sites