Social Life and Energy Work

[dragonfire]

I'm curious to know how many people here actually have a social life and practice energy work.

 

When I mean social life, I mean go out with friends to eat, drink beers, and hitting the night clubs. I'm only 33 years old and single, and I find that energy work sometimes changes things. I'm more affected by others energy when I am near them.

 

I enjoy having a few beers (usually 3) or a cocktail with friends.

 

How many people actually stopping drinking alcohol completely or socializing?

 

I'm kind of feeling more and more, that I'm forcing myself to be more in solitude because of the extra

energy. Like an increase in anxiety sometimes.

[Oolong Rabbit]

I'm curious to know how many people here actually have a social life and practice energy work.

 

When I mean social life, I mean go out with friends to eat, drink beers, and hitting the night clubs. I'm only 33 years old and single, and I find that energy work sometimes changes things. I'm more affected by others energy when I am near them.

 

I enjoy having a few beers (usually 3) or a cocktail with friends.

 

How many people actually stopping drinking alcohol completely or socializing?

 

I'm kind of feeling more and more, that I'm forcing myself to be more in solitude because of the extra

energy. Like an increase in anxiety sometimes.

 

Cultivation seems to change you in many subtle ways. I started craving healthier foods. I pretty much cut out liquor altogether, as I have no desire for it anymore. In fact, I find it very difficult to even be in the pressence of drunken people. The nightlife crowd just seem like so many hungry ghosts (misguided, deluded, and catering to their lower nature). This obviously effects my social life, and some relationships with friends etc... I could go on, but you get the idea.

 

BTW, I am also 33.

[林愛偉]

I'm curious to know how many people here actually have a social life and practice energy work.

 

When I mean social life, I mean go out with friends to eat, drink beers, and hitting the night clubs. I'm only 33 years old and single, and I find that energy work sometimes changes things. I'm more affected by others energy when I am near them.

 

I enjoy having a few beers (usually 3) or a cocktail with friends.

 

How many people actually stopping drinking alcohol completely or socializing?

 

I'm kind of feeling more and more, that I'm forcing myself to be more in solitude because of the extra

energy. Like an increase in anxiety sometimes.

 

 

Well, I'm 28yrs old, I have friends whom I see on a friday night for a few hours, but no bars, or drinking.

When at home, my father likes to have a beer or two in which I may drink one with him for the sake of conversation, but that's about it, and that's rare as well. I'm not one for drinking though.

 

I go out with my Sifu after Wing Chun class, and we chat over a late night snack just for the hell of it.

But in general, cultivation changes one's mind, and alters one's habits, so a lot of the "usual" things that one may do may not be in a cultivator's lifestyle.

 

It is quite normal to have such a result as not being with friends much, not going out late, and not even watching TV or even listening to the radio. The mind finds no need for such things because there is a transformation of one's views when in the world of cultivation.

 

I've been in that world since about 8, 9 yrs old. I had an active teenage years with friends and the like, but there was always a conflict of interest when it came to hanging out with them late nights, and the like. TUrns out most of them are still doing the same thing, still on drugs, and still drinking. Some tohught I had died, some thought I was in a mental institution...they haven't heard from me in YEARS, and when they did hear of how I am, they were in shock.

 

I remember seeing an old frined about a year ago..his first words were, " can you lend me 5 dollars?" and it was for marijuana...lol I didn't give it to him, and after that he never called me, and I never saw him again..of course, I went back to China, but now that I have returned, still no sign of him or my old friends..lol

 

In the world of cultivation, it is just two different levels of mental state when it comes to meetings with those of no cultivation in this life.

 

As Grand Master Cheng Man Ching said for Taiji Quan and daily life. "Invest in Loss."

 

Peace and Blessings,

Lin

Edited October 17, 2008 by 林愛偉

[shontonga]

great questions.

 

Seems true, seems true.

 

Never been extremely social, lol!

Am a hermit by nature and by choice!

Left the "seen" the day of high school graduation,was never really there anyway!

Was the best thing about graduating! Most folks from back then I see only in passing

... memory sucks... don't even usually recognize them. Sometimes they know me?

I was just there to get out of there! Was often among the missing in school... had rather been outside!

Would still rather be outside!!!

 

This life is odd in many ways, lots not understood by many "normal???" folks.

There is small handful of good friends who come and pull me out of my cave once in awhile.

We go have supper or breakfast or something, they know I'll want to take off soon , my truck is near !

And have other friends that I get to practice with once in awhile, wish it was more often!

They've been friends for a long time, we carry each other's history in a sense.

If we don't see each other for a few years we can still pick up like there was no lapse in time!

 

Have been a "real" hermit at different points in my life with no more than 5 people regularly in my days.

In truth it was more like 2 or 3. But as good as it was and as much as was learned from it,

I wasn't learning enough!!! Me not learning is a sure key to getting depressed !

Need feed back and inspiration and knowledge and stories and smiles and maybe a hug once in a while?

It's a reason for me to work with the public now (NO! Not the hugs!!!).

Work with energy. Earns me a paycheck and I get a lot of feed back, learn a lot.

Have heard it all by now i think,LOL. Don't even blink when someone says they have a "strange" question!

and seen more than anyone in there right mind would believe, Hahaha, It's a daily thing.

 

The more you work with energy the more you perceive it. The more you learn to allow

or not allow it to effect you? It will teach you. Sometimes like it or not!

... am not always so graceful about learning on this end

There is tricks for everything though, worth talking about and sharing them.

What works for one might not work for another but if you just tweek it a little, the right way for you,

and it could be a life saver! I like to learn and teach through foolishness

 

Also don't drink. Don't smoke. Don't like being around it. Won't be around it if I have a choice.

Have had some training where it is REQUIRED. So there are times that i do.

Only ever smoked in prayer.(and no, no wackytabacky.) And rarely have more than two sips of any alcohol.

Worse than drunks are the folks that act drunk as soon as you put a beer in their hand. Can't stand that.

You want to hear how foul mouthed I can be!?! I do have some talent! ...and Pride for that talent!

 

At this stage in the game it is important for me to be around folks with similar (crazy?) ways.

Whatever way that is for them. Peoples spirituality and where they find it is important to me.

Growth inspires growth sometimes. Come winter the pull to withdraw is greater, during warmer weather

what is learned is shared and put into action more. There are seasons for things, i find?

 

Sweet dreams,

Sorry for rambling before sleep,LOL,

goodnight!

 

Shon

 

Thank you .

 

Oh, and I'm *cough*anoldlady*cough*of34*Cough*ithink?

That cough kinda hurts

 

Peace!

[de_paradise]

 

I'm kind of feeling more and more, that I'm forcing myself to be more in solitude because of the extra

energy. Like an increase in anxiety sometimes.

 

I can relate to this. Why go out when my body is hopped up on energy? Its as if it becomes an excuse to not do things.

 

Like Shon, Im attracted to spiritual-minded people, but I dont know many in town. I think I would socialize more if I actually seek these people out. Its terribly rare to find people who give spiritual cultivation more than just bleary-eyed lip service.

 

Like Lin indicated, my mind is not seeking out distraction. Like last night, I was thinking of the new Woody Allen movie, but decided I dont really want the little escapism the movie gives. But Im sure its a good film.

 

Another thing is hormonal swings, sometimes yin is dominant and its nice to stay at home. But when yang and testosterone builds, I get an edgyness and its hard to live with the tranquil habit patterns of a meditator. This is really important to notice and address, because at these times if you dont express yourself, it will lead to frustration and negativity. If I find myself saying something like, ah fuck this bullshit meditation and being impatient, I immeditately start checking for other other signs of a rise in sexual energy.

 

As for alcohol, I cut drastically. I get more of an altered state buzz from meditation. Booze seems like I'm slumming now.

[hagar]

Strange. either I must be doing something wrong, or we're just dancing to the beats of different drums.

 

I really feel that my practice has led me into socializing more, and spending more time with non-practitioners.

Actually, I feel the longer I practice, I find that this separation really is a trap. It's good to force yourself to relate in a conventional, yet mindful way to anyone. Solitude is really not all what it's cracked up to be.

 

I get more curious, less inhibited, less focused on being "special" and "spiritual", and also less careful. Actually, allthough being a family man, the more I practice, the more I feel drawn to enjoying food, drink, nightclubs, and flaunt my practice very little these days. I rarely talk about it anywhere else but here. The one thing I feel is that life is SHORT. Don't waste it on being spiritual!

 

Life is about appreciating the pleasures that are there. I eat meat, drink wine, go clubbing, watch movies, hang out with friends, go on holidays.

 

And everyday after lunch, I have a cake

 

sigh!

Am I being naughty?

[Taiji Bum]

I avoided socializing but not intentionally during my 20's and 30's. I was just obsessed with the alchemy. I think there are times you need to socialize and times you need to be a hermit. The problem is knowing which is which. I'd say avoid socializing like the plague in the beginning of alchemy especially when your building the foundation but in the stage of training your baby shen I'd guess its ok to go to a party or two.

[Spiritual_Aspirant]

Advanced spiritual practices heighten the vibration of the practitioner, and energy attracts like energy. Naturally, those energies that are no longer compatible with you fall away and you tend to attract and get attracted to energies that resonate with yours.

[三江源]

.

Edited April 15, 2015 by 三江源

[ddilulo_06]

I only got drunk a few times... it was kinda nice to be able to let go a little, but it makes me feel like shit. I tried it again 6 months ago, and it still sucks. It wouldn't surprise me it it screws with one's energy system, but that's just a guess.

 

The main reason I got into all of this was to be able to have a social life - I missed out on a lot growing up (I'm 20), but it led me here, so I'm grateful.

 

Now, I find if much easier to just go to school and enjoy people. It's working quite nicely. I find myself having the intention to give + play more and more each day, rather than attempting to suck energy from others in the form of approval.

Edited October 17, 2008 by ddilulo_06

[Unconditioned]

Advanced spiritual practices heighten the vibration of the practitioner, and energy attracts like energy. Naturally, those energies that are no longer compatible with you fall away and you tend to attract and get attracted to energies that resonate with yours.

 

Energy can also give you a certain 'something' about you that pulls all types of people in. Since I've started practicing meditation, cultivation, what have you - I've noticed that more people tend to be attracted to me (in a social way).

 

As we cultivate, we radiate. When we radiate some people may wonder "wow, what is it about him/her that they're always in a great mood, smiling, helpful, such a good leader, etc. etc."

 

In my opinion, I think living as an example is one of the best things we can do. Why light a room when you can light up everything/everyone you're around? A healthy balance of both solitude and social activities perhaps...

[ddilulo_06]

I feel this is appropriate:

 

http://marinko-on-shyness.com/

[Bum Grasshopper]

As a home brewer, I can see the Tao of beer. Fermentation is a natural process in which yeast, a one cell organism which is both a plant and and an animal, turns sugar into alcohol and CO2. The process of beer making is truly an amazing work of the Tao.

 

In moderation, beer tastes good, relaxes us, makes us feel good, and is healthy for us. The amount of alcohol in one or two beers a day is better for you than no alcohol at all. The amount of calories in a beer is less than an equivocal amount of soda or juice. Beer is nutritious. Brewers yeast is very high in B vitamins.

 

If consumed in excess, beer gives you a hangover and causes many problems.

 

Some attribute the cultivation of grain (to make beer) as the facilitator of the birth of civilization.

 

As civilization grew and polluted the drinking water, beer sustained life in the big city.

 

I think of beer as a great gift of the Tao.

 

As for social life, mine has increased since I started cultivating. Most of my socializing is with family. I just seem to be more open and supportive to them lately. I also get great social interaction at tai chi/ chi gung classes.

[fizix]

I think that socialization and energy work can go well hand in hand, I would not recommend anyone to abandon their social life for the sake of energy cultivation; why?

 

Do you remember that feeling, that surge of energy that arose in you after an enticing or unexpected conversation with a friend or even a stranger? You could be feeling like total crap, too tired to even walk without extreme annoyance, and one simple conversation or random act of kindness can totally lift you up and make you feel like a million dollars. I see that in itself as energy work; the energy of human interaction and relationships, something one would be hard pressed to experience while living in solitude.

 

I'm not saying that it is bad to isolate yourself for a time so you can gain a deeper insight/cultivation with your practice, but I truly wouldn't recommend abandoning the trials of society for that sole purpose.

 

Energy cultivation has definitely, drastically altered my perception of relationships and social life, for the better, and some may say you have no social life, others may say you live like a rockstar - it's all relatively arbitrary anyways. I'd say don't worry about living too little or too much of a social life/or training in your practice. Just consider the everlasting Tao, it is the Source that will waive our illusions of priorities and concerns in the end of it all.

[dragonfire]

Wow... such great responses!

 

I think energy work does change a person. It opens our eyes to a new world and new

ways of thinking. I still want to maintain some balance, so I'll continue to drink a few beers but cut out the liquor. I think eventually I'll cut it out completely when my energy levels rise higher.

 

I realized I was starting to be a little too introverted and I don't think it was good. Almost felt like my

personality was changing. I've forced myself to go out more, yet still distance myself from people's energy. I Feel much better just being out there seeing other people running around. I think later, when I start to meditate for longer periods of time with more Chi, solitude will be necessary.

 

Its true, people can sense you are different. I've had times when I'm sitting and my energy gets heated and rises and I'm like a heater. I can see other people's reactions. Like, they are thinking something weird about this person? lol.

[.broken.]

Energy cultivation gives rise to courage, and to sensitivity.

 

Sensitivity allows us to determine the subtle and its effects. The subtle influences everything and connects everything. Alcohol has its effect on the subtle, as much as alcohol is a form of the subtle. The same applies to drugs and socialising... and well, everything else too.

 

Courage gives us the strength to be ourselves, to leave friends of old built on superficiality and continue our own path.

 

There is no universal approach that'll work for everybody, yet conversely balance is key in all aspects.

 

Listen, feel and choose. Your life, after all, is in your hands.

 

Yours, sensing equilibrium,

James

[dragonfire]

I agree with you 100% .broken.

 

Energy cultivation gives rise to courage, and to sensitivity.

 

Sensitivity allows us to determine the subtle and its effects. The subtle influences everything and connects everything. Alcohol has its effect on the subtle, as much as alcohol is a form of the subtle. The same applies to drugs and socialising... and well, everything else too.

 

Courage gives us the strength to be ourselves, to leave friends of old built on superficiality and continue our own path.

 

There is no universal approach that'll work for everybody, yet conversely balance is key in all aspects.

 

Listen, feel and choose. Your life, after all, is in your hands.

 

Yours, sensing equilibrium,

James

[.broken.]

I agree with you 100% .broken.

 

I read a verse today from the Dhammapada which I thought was apt to this thread:

 

"Should a traveler fail to find a companion

Equal or better,

Rather than suffer the company of a fool,

He should resolutely walk alone."

 

Yours, in loneliness,

James

[Fire Dragon]

[Mal]

D asked if I wanted to go out for dinner tonight, as soon as she asked I didn't really want to, besides it's practice day So my friend Mal came over and we did 2 hrs of kung fu after work which was great fun.

(Sifu calls him Cookie but won't call me Mal_S {say it out loud })

 

Then I went out to dinner at cactus jacks with D, had fobbed her off the last 3 times. It was alright. But I'm having more fun surfing the net now and probably would have preferred to save the $$ and have food here. Especially as she is now asleep and I still have heaps of stuff I want to read etc before I go to bed.

 

I'm very anti social. I've always had fun after I go out i.e. in retrospect but I hate the lead up and the actual doing part. How sad is that.

 

p.s. We had margaritas, but I had to drive us home so no fun there!

p.p.s. Although cultivation has made me more social than I was in my 20's I still don't really like socializing.

edit p.p.p.s In the cold light of day it could read like I didn't have much fun with D, which isn't true. I always like spending time with her so I guess going out was good because it let us do some "human watching" which we both enjoy when we are together.

[mjjbecker]

 

I read a verse today from the Dhammapada which I thought was apt to this thread:

 

"Should a traveler fail to find a companion

Equal or better,

Rather than suffer the company of a fool,

He should resolutely walk alone."

 

Yours, in loneliness,

James

 

Thoughts on a Still Night

 

Before my bed, the moon is shining bright,

I think that it is frost upon the ground.

I raise my head and look at the bright moon,

I lower my head and think of home.

 

Li Bai