Hi everybody

[Creation]

Wow, my first post on thetaobums! I haven't ever participated in blogging or internet forums before (it took me almost ten minutes to figure out how to post ) but I have gotten so much out of reading the material here that I just had to get in on the fun. So, a special thanks to Sean and all the people who make this possible.

 

Since you asked for it, here's some background on me. But I have a tendency to rant <gets self conscious>.

 

I like to question everything, to understand, and to discover relationships and patterns in the things around and inside me. On the other hand, I like to be expressive, to forget myself, and to experience the world without any tinge of interpretation. Often times I feel like there are many people inside of me, fighting with each other. My mind is very disharmonious. I get depressed a lot, am rather irresponsible, and have trouble focusing and committing. I dropped out of college last year because the aforementioned troubles became unbearable (the ultimate irony for me, since I love learning so much and wanted to get my PhD. in pure mathematics). The number one issue for me now is working through my issues and gaining stability and harmony in my mind/body processes. So I've taken to Taoism, that great philosophy way of life which stresses harmony and integration of opposites above all else.

 

I don't have a teacher and I'm pretty broke. So I got some instructional materials to get started with and am saving money to study with a good teacher. For now, my practice is geared toward laying the foundation: internalizing correct postural and breathing mechanics, developing an awareness of chi, sinking chi and rooting, and stilling the monkey mind. Zhan zhuang and meditating on the breath are my most consistent practices. Here's the problem, though. With no teacher or peer group, my disintegrated and undisciplined nature is a huge obstacle to consistent practice, and since my concentration is in the toilet, I fear I'm not able to get nearly the full benefit out of the practices I'm doing. But I'll keep trying, because I think right now it's my best bet to get better. And along the way, I might make some progress toward self-realization and God-realization, my real aims in life. What a deal!

 

Your fellow seeker,

Tyler

[Mal]

Hi Tyler,

 

Welcome to the 'bums. Glad you worked out how to post.

 

Building a solid foundation is always a smart move, so you don't sound that undisciplined. Take it easy and most importantly have fun and enjoy your practice.

[Taiji Bum]

Welcome to da Bums.