Houston, we have a problem...

[Yoda]

I've owned the aneros for 2 weeks and have tried it 3 times and I've achieved...

 

 

Hemorrhoids.

 

 

I'm not making this up.

 

What should I do? Ebay it?

 

Maybe I'll just hang on to it so it can show up in my estate sale someday.

 

In the words of Avril Livigne, "So much for my happy ending."

 

-Yoda

[spyrelx]

That was so funny I almost fell of my chair. Sorry. I feel for you, really.

 

You're also convinced me NEVER to buy one of those things on ebay.

 

By the way, and completely off the subject of you're rear end, there's an article in the NYTimes today about blind joggers. It discusses the way they train, etc. (they're training for the NYC marathon). Somehow I thought you might be interested.

[Yoda]

WWJD?

 

-Yoda

[Cameron]

I was on the ropes thinking of ordering it but that has helped me decide not to. I will just do the deer excercise Ken Cohen teaches to keep that area in check. Thanks.

[thelerner]

You mean there's not big resale market for a gently used aneros?

 

Peas

 

Michael

[Yoda]

I got the Helix model. Maybe there's a kinder, gentler one out there.

 

I'll sell it "like new."

 

-Yoda

[Yoda]

Seriously, the thingy has potential...

 

Actually, most of the thingies have 100% money back (if you order from the mothership) except for the experimental ones like what I bought, but even that is pretty generous. It sounds like they are giving more refunds on the experimental ones.

 

So I'll get the standard model and see if I fare better.

 

-Yoda

[turbo]

Yoda,

 

start with a beginners model, not the modded pro edition (save it for later). dont expect anything the first ten times you try it. i nearly gave up on it, but it works. its really quite amazing.

 

have you tried more lube? if your tearing/irritating the lining of your colon, then you must be using an awful lot of pressure, slow down, _relax_, be gentle, try a different angle.

 

the reviews and experiences on the aneros website are quite informative as to how other folks have gotten it to work.

 

good luck

 

t

[sean]

Hilarious post Yoda. Yeah, you'll probably want to step it down on a size and go slowwwww. It usually take me 10-15 minutes to open up to it going in. If you think about it, that's a long time. Also it's really really important that you are using a gel lube.

[Yoda]

So I explained my predicament with the nice folks at customer service, and they'll ship out another 'less aggressive' model. I'll give it one more shot. I really want some non-ejaculatory orgasms. It would really take the edge off the retention practice.

 

I'm not exactly feeling like Laotzu at the moment...

 

-Yoda

[thelerner]

Goodness, what is there 'Tech Support' like? How many plunges were you doing sir?, I see, are you exceptionally hairy down there? Right handed or left handed?

 

'Sir, you did order the Giganto model you know, To know if its right for you, you'll need a measuring tape and several well placed mirrors'

 

Peas

 

Michael

 

Like Cinderella its all about finding the slipper that fits, or the fit thats slippery.

[spyrelx]

So I explained my predicament with the nice folks at customer service, and they'll ship out another 'less aggressive' model.  I'll give it one more shot.  I really want some non-ejaculatory orgasms.  It would really take the edge off the retention practice. 

 

I'm not exactly feeling like Laotzu at the moment...

 

-Yoda

6764[/snapback]

 

 

OK, this is VERY IMPORTANT for me to know -- did they have you send your current model back to them (i.e., for resale)?

[Yoda]

All kidding aside, it's an ethical company with a good product--so I didn't have to return it or anything. -Y

[el_tortugo]

what in the hell are you guys doing!

[sunshine]

Just a little question, Yodaman... you haven't possibly tried shooting the Helix out of your butt by building up enormous pressure on the inside???

[Yoda]

that's one of those iron shirt practices we are better off without.