joeblast Posted March 7, 2009 I wish I had posted this in off topic haha granted, now its in off topic and noone pays attention to it! I wish...I could think of a wish I have what I need to get where I want, I just have to collect my impetus Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Mal Posted March 7, 2009 Granted you collect your Impetus and have now thought of heaps of better wishes. I don't like having to wait and wait for items I've brought to arrive in the post. I wish there was teleport technology. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Wayfarer64 Posted March 7, 2009 I wish I had a great reason to take my pants off... Oh no not here, not now! 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Taomeow Posted March 7, 2009 Granted you collect your Impetus and have now thought of heaps of better wishes. I don't like having to wait and wait for items I've brought to arrive in the post. I wish there was teleport technology. Items you bought you mean? Granted. A teleport hacker intervening on your purchase of a new Taobums Rule! T-shirt, unaware of the fact that you're already wearing it since it arrived instantly and you put it on right away, teleports you to Fargo in the process of stealing the T-shirt. Oops... Welcome to America, dude, he says apologetically as you show up in his living-room. Wish I knew how to send you back, the program I'm using only teleports things toward me, not away from me... Wanna beer or something?.. I wish all the sci-fi books in my head had already been written by me. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
forestofsouls Posted March 7, 2009 Granted. All the writing, and the whole of your life are behind you. You are 99 years old now. Good run, if only you'd been there to see it! I wish everyone ran blissful energy all the time. I wish all the sci-fi books in my head had already been written by me. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
thelerner Posted March 7, 2009 Granted. All the writing, and the whole of your life are behind you. You are 99 years old now. Good run, if only you'd been there to see it! I wish everyone ran blissful energy all the time. Granted. Everyone is fantastically happy and does what they want. Food production plummets, garbage pick up non existent, world spirals into ruins. I wish everyone at the tonights party loves my Chili. <hard to conceive they wouldn't, I'm a Chili master!> 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
forestofsouls Posted March 7, 2009 Granted. All the people at your party become enamored with your chili. Obsessed. So much, in fact, that all reason and control leaves them, turning them into Chili Zombies. They roam the party, eyes dilated, barely awake, moaning "CHIIILII!! CHIIILIII!" Eventually, when the chili runs out, they turn to human brains. Thanks! I wish for a nice cup of tea. I wish everyone at the tonights party loves my Chili. <hard to conceive they wouldn't, I'm a Chili master!> 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
TheWhiteRabbit Posted March 8, 2009 (edited) I wish to bring this thread back, without people having something to prove and twice as much so. Edited March 8, 2009 by TheWhiteRabbit Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
zanshin Posted March 8, 2009 Granted. All the people at your party become enamored with your chili. Obsessed. So much, in fact, that all reason and control leaves them, turning them into Chili Zombies. They roam the party, eyes dilated, barely awake, moaning "CHIIILII!! CHIIILIII!" Eventually, when the chili runs out, they turn to human brains. Thanks! I wish for a nice cup of tea. the tea is so nice, you'll never have tea quite as good again though so you will always be terribly disappointed after this one. And for White Rabbit- I'm granting yours no problem, to the best of my ability, the downside is I don't have much power in that regard. I wish I could do 100 pushups with good form. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Machin Shin Posted March 8, 2009 I wish to bring this thread back, without people having something to prove and twice as much so. Granted I wish that I had missed the day in class that Max attained union with the Tao. Can you smell what the rock is cooking? Max was pushing hands with John. I stood there watching and their shadows flickered in and out of reality... Then the whirlwind of envy Class pretty much ended but I had the sense of mind to remember to pay him with Tea Then the wall of wind..... (they don't talk about that part very often.....) Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Apech Posted March 8, 2009 I wish anyone that wanted to could teleport themself anywhere. Like in The Stars My Destination by Alfred Bester TaoMeow Granted... oh, hi, nice to see you ...oh! he's gone again (I'll never get used to that). I wish everyone would give everyone else a nice big hug. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
TheWhiteRabbit Posted March 8, 2009 Granted... oh, hi, nice to see you ...oh! he's gone again (I'll never get used to that). I wish everyone would give everyone else a nice big hug. Granted, The world becomes a more caring place, especially with all the free transportation via being able to turn yourself into light, slip through the mesh of space and rematerialize. With all the hugging going on, people find more time to focus on more interesting things like whats for dinner... Of course this is to the disgust of a few of the population who are insensitive scabs... I wish zero point energy generators (water devices) were in mass production to produce unlimited energy cheap and that they were used instead of gasoline engines... The patent is going to expire in a year or so. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Machin Shin Posted March 8, 2009 Granted. Since you now have no experience of Max you and constantly bewildered by all the conflicting information and debate. You are now so confused you are unable to let go. Bester[/s] TaoMeow That's right I always called him Dorje, as for letting go I still have to meet Segal Rinpoche and talk about the phurba of Padmasambhava, not to mention myself being the lineage master of some book...... Also debate is pretty much pointless for me. Not many westerners can actually do buddhist debate. Fargo North Dakota? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
NeutralWire Posted March 9, 2009 Fargo North Dakota? Granted. Your inchoate wish causes the North Dakota State Bisons to 'go far' in the Division II National Championships; however, they are disqualified for the use of Taoist magic in a crucial 4th down play. I wish everyone would just settle down and get on with it. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
seadog Posted March 9, 2009 Granted. Your inchoate wish causes the North Dakota State Bisons to 'go far' in the Division II National Championships; however, they are disqualified for the use of Taoist magic in a crucial 4th down play. I wish everyone would just settle down and get on with it. Granted earth population climbs to over 50 billion. I wish that I could talk to the animals Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Mak_Tin_Si Posted March 9, 2009 Granted, one day you became a new type of animal and now you can understand and talk in many animals language but no friends because you are alien that have over millions of faces... I wish taoism in the east can get to the west finally with full version and not just the TTC. Granted earth population climbs to over 50 billion. I wish that I could talk to the animals Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
zanshin Posted March 9, 2009 Granted, one day you became a new type of animal and now you can understand and talk in many animals language but no friends because you are alien that have over millions of faces... I wish taoism in the east can get to the west finally with full version and not just the TTC. Full version of official Chinese government sanctioned teachings only becomes popular in West. I wish my retirement funds were doing better. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
TheWhiteRabbit Posted March 9, 2009 Full version of official Chinese government sanctioned teachings only becomes popular in West. I wish my retirement funds were doing better. You get a tip that is highly illegal and you become filthy rich! 45 billion to say the least. Now that you can do anything you want you find it hard to find the time for things you enjoyed before. Eventually you move to Bhutan to avoid the onslaught of people after the economy goes south, and make the native people very happy with the wealth being distributed there, you build a mansion and the natives erect a Daoist Temple in your honor... I wish my right foot would stop hurting (club foot+ surgery) and would be normal... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
thelerner Posted March 9, 2009 I wish my right foot would stop hurting (club foot+ surgery) and would be normal... Granted. Your foot stops hurting, is perfectly normal and on display (in glass jar) at orthotics museum I wish for a beatiful productive garden this year. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ThisLife Posted March 9, 2009 (edited) Granted. Your foot stops hurting, is perfectly normal and on display (in glass jar) at orthotics museum I wish for a beatiful productive garden this year. GRANTED : Your garden blooms , blossoms and thrives like it has never done before. Just as the first of the bumper crops are getting ready to harvest, your gums start to ache in a most disturbing way. A visit to your dentist and you find that you have a rare gum disease that even the wisdom contained in the 2,200 replies to Yoda's "Tooth Regeneration" post could not heal. The only choice is to have all your teeth out and a full set of dentures. You won't be able to eat anything except canned soup for the next 3 months till everything has settled in. I wish for full and complete Enlightenment. Each of these other wishes all have major flies in their ointment !! . Edited March 9, 2009 by ThisLife Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
TheWhiteRabbit Posted March 9, 2009 GRANTED : Your garden blooms , blossoms and thrives like it has never done before. Just as the first of the bumper crops are getting ready to harvest, your gums start to ache in a most disturbing way. A visit to your dentist and you find that you have a rare gum disease that even the wisdom contained in Yoda's "Tooth Regeneration" post cannot heal. The only choice is to have all your teeth out and a full set of dentures. You won't be able to eat anything except canned soup for the next 3 months till everything has settled in. I wish for full and complete Enlightenment. Each of these other wishes all have major flies in their ointment !! . You gain complete enlightenment, more so than any other human being... You get to keep your body though still being able to travel as a spirit, unfortunately since your energy vibration is higher than anyone elses, you get to a place no one else has reached, and become lost in one of the higher planes of existence... Lifes rough that way. Since the wish about flies in ointment was not specific, the worlds oil supplies organic as well as inorganic turn into large gad flies. Ugh, so bad they name the flies after you. Due to some severe imbalance that occurs, the insects that decay and clean up decayed material have decreased and the stench becomes horrible. I wish everyone on Taobums gets five million dollars after taxes! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Oolong Rabbit Posted March 10, 2009 You gain complete enlightenment, more so than any other human being... You get to keep your body though still being able to travel as a spirit, unfortunately since your energy vibration is higher than anyone elses, you get to a place no one else has reached, and become lost in one of the higher planes of existence... Lifes rough that way. Since the wish about flies in ointment was not specific, the worlds oil supplies organic as well as inorganic turn into large gad flies. Ugh, so bad they name the flies after you. Due to some severe imbalance that occurs, the insects that decay and clean up decayed material have decreased and the stench becomes horrible. I wish everyone on Taobums gets five million dollars after taxes! Everyone on Taobums sinks into materialistic depravity with their new found wealth. They all fall off the spiritual path, and taobums no longer exists. Way to go money grubbers. I wish all sentient beings achieved buddhahood and ended their suffering. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
thelerner Posted March 10, 2009 Everyone on Taobums sinks into materialistic depravity with their new found wealth. They all fall off the spiritual path, and taobums no longer exists. Way to go money grubbers. I wish all sentient beings achieved buddhahood and ended their suffering. Granted All mankind lives in harmony according to their innermost buddha nature. Alas Lions, tigers, dogs, cats and other carnivores achieve there buddhahood and live according to there true nature. Soon mankind is lunch. I wish..for fish. (sorry, creative juices dried up) too thoughtlless . . I wish I could get through all 10 steps of Initiation Into Hermetics by Bardon quickly easily and effortlessly Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
