When sadness comes, and you don't want it to go away?

[awake]

Why is it that when a sad or bad state of being comes over me, I don't want it to go away, I don't want to let it go?

[bailey]

Why is it that when a sad or bad state of being comes over me, I don't want it to go away, I don't want to let it go?

 

Everything has its own time. Forcing sadness away might do more harm than letting it run its natural course. Maybe part of you senses this, and prefers a more natural timing.

[DaoChild]

Like attracts like; additionally, humans love wallowing in our own self-pity and misery.

[freeform]

Why is it that when a sad or bad state of being comes over me, I don't want it to go away, I don't want to let it go?

 

Check out the enneagram... you're most likely a type 4 personality...

[Aetherous]

The way I view it, we are entertained by and addicted to negative feelings. They make up who we think we are, so it feels normal to have them around.

 

A person can actually feel empty when they stop feeling sad. They will assume (on a subconscious level) that there's a hole where the sadness was, so they need to fill it back up again.

 

Or they'll feel like they are free falling, and so they desperately try to grab onto the branch of despair in order to gain some stability again.

 

It's almost as if feeling normal emotionally is like traveling in a foreign land, and feeling anxious/depressed/pissed off is like the comfort of home. Some people are really hooked on their pointless feelings.

 

Kinda weird.

 

No one can let go of any emotion. It's almost more accurate to say the emotions let go of us, in time. Or even more accurately: that it's impossible to stop feeling the way you do...so just accept it!

 

But it can be beneficial to make a very clear declaration to change your life, and work hard at it. Qigong can also help neutralize the emotions. All we have to do is keep living life, and eventually things balance out.

 

Edit: ...or they don't.

Edited May 9, 2009 by Scotty

[trailmaker]

The way I view it, we are entertained by and addicted to negative feelings. They make up who we think we are, so it feels normal to have them around.

 

A person can actually feel empty when they stop feeling sad. They will assume (on a subconscious level) that there's a hole where the sadness was, so they need to fill it back up again.

 

Or they'll feel like they are free falling, and so they desperately try to grab onto the branch of despair in order to gain some stability again.

 

It's almost as if feeling normal emotionally is like traveling in a foreign land, and feeling anxious/depressed/pissed off is like the comfort of home. Some people are really hooked on their pointless feelings.

 

Kinda weird.

 

No one can let go of any emotion. It's almost more accurate to say the emotions let go of us, in time. Or even more accurately: that it's impossible to stop feeling the way you do...so just accept it!

 

But it can be beneficial to make a very clear declaration to change your life, and work hard at it. Qigong can also help neutralize the emotions. All we have to do is keep living life, and eventually things balance out.

 

Edit: ...or they don't.

 

 

hear, hear!

 

and in the meantime put on a good blues cd and enjoy.

 

or read some li po or even better on the blues, basho.

[Fire Dragon]

This seems to be weired! That you want to stay with the sadness feeling. You have to look at the alternative, what do you mean by letting it go away, is that to just think you could just let it dissapear. If you just let it dissapear where is it then? If a bad emotion not is dealt with it will be stored in your body and it will make you out of ballance in another way. So maybe you have to be in the bad feeling for awhile to be able to let it go in a better way. It is actually through feeling it that it eventually will dissapear and that process is cyclical I think. What you have to do is to learn how to deal with it and not to let it take ower the whole you, to be able to feel sadness and anyway be able to function in some way and doing the good stuff in your life is perhaps the tricky part. And to know when you do best in letting go to the bad feelings completely to then later let it have less influence on you.

 

 

This is not completed, just some associations in this moment...

 

 

F D

[Gerard]

Why is it that when a sad or bad state of being comes over me, I don't want it to go away, I don't want to let it go?

 

 

You have a deep emotional scarring that needs to be removed. Practice walking meditation and/or quality IMA, that is from a teacher with a strong traditional Chinese background (preferably Taoist).

 

edited: forgot word.

Edited May 10, 2009 by durkhrod chogori

[Apech]

Melancholy is creative - read any poet.

[Gerard]

Poets are loaded with emotional blockages.

[awake]

I am indeed getting into walking.

 

I think the true question I am trying to ask here is, is feeling through these feelings is eroding them from myself, or making the power of those feelings over me stronger?

[joeblast]

Love the fractal AV!

 

 

Just see them objectively for what they are. Treat them like a visitor...have a conversation if there's something to be gleaned from it, but understand that you can ostensibly look at your watch and say 'well, its getting late, time for you to go'...in whatever words

 

Dont forget that you're the one in control, happiness is a decision. Convince yourself you're in a funk and you'll be the only one that can really get you out of it.

[Deepbluesea]

Man ... I really feel for you. I'm dealing with the same thing, only its anger. I just figured it out yesterday, so I'm really interested in some ideas. I don't think that I can just "wait it out" a) that's not me I don't think that will work. But it is exactly as you say ... the attachment to it is the sickness, its like an addiction, you know its a problem but there is a part of you that enjoys it and won't let you stop.